• Member Since 20th Feb, 2017
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

Ravenwood18


E

Jack Crusher is a just another duelist entering an academy with some of the best around. Little does a lot of others at the academy know about his 4 time world championship career, and what an inspiration he is to others. Little does he know that his past is coming back for him, and everyone he's surrounded by. Sooner or later, many ugly truths about Jack will come out to face Jack that he has to deal with, and for the sake of the Academy, he has to do what he can to fight them off. (BTW, many other ponies will appear in this story that aren't mentioned, there aren't link rules nor monsters in this story, and i tired to be funny so the cover art is the best I could find)."

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 6 )

“Don’t look at me like that. You act like I don’t study.” Pinkie Pie replies, looking back at the arena.

Pinkie Pie? I thought they were looking at Twilight.

Overall a little hard to read with very fast pacing.

oookkkayyy I got to ask what the hell happen in this. It feel like it just dropped in the middle of the story with no background and with how the enemies just lost so easily there felt like there was no tension at all. I mean man Spikes whole team had some Tier 3 or 4 decks. Even Jack's deck and and his team felt meh, but I guess that does follow the show where it is all main character powers lol. It just honestly felt super weird to be frank. Not to badly written even tho I think the duel could have been spaced out more to make it easier to follow and the LP could have been written in a way to make them easier to follow.

9170242
Forgive me. My writing is a little edgy right now. I'm just getting back into it. Thanks for the like though.

9170941
I'm sorry if it was confusing. I'm still working on my writing. I'll take your feedback into consideration. Since you brought up the life points, how do you think i should set it up? I'm just asking for an opinion since I looked back on the story and completely understand what you mean. Any suggestions? I'm always open to ideas.

9171260
Well I think something as simple as

Opponent A: 4000
Opponent B: 4000

Would work so it would be much clearer to see how many LP the duelist have.

9171272
That'll work perfectly. Thank you for your opinion. I'll make sure to change that.

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