• Member Since 31st Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Aug 15th, 2019

Elusive Phoenix


If a tire was on fire during a blizzard, would you stay close to it and keep warm, or run from the awful smell?

T

Do you think the Royal Guard just stands at doors with a blank face? Or were you aware that there is a war outside Equestria?
That's how Rainbow Dash felt when she was asked to join the guard. She could be the one to prevent more innocent deaths, or to halt the war altogether. But no matter the outcome, she will still save more lives than she realizes...

(Military experience is from my own knowledge, which is very limited.)

Chapters (8)
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Comments ( 49 )

woo hoo! :yay: More Guard stories! and this one has Rainbow Dash!

Interesting concept.
Good idea, I'd like to see where you take this.

I forced myself to get the next chapter out.
I'M TOO EXCITED, AND I'VE BEEN WRITING ALL DAY!!!

Good idea for a story.

Remember to chop it up into paragraphs though and I thought that a recruiter saluting a recruit was a little weird.

Anywho, it was decent and it was enough for a like! :pinkiehappy:

Silver out!

Wow, this was fast. Coming from me that's saying something...

and a bit of criticism that has nothing to do with the plot of this: Ever thought about putting spaces between the lines? Kinda helps out in reading.

1007459 Thanks! I'll fix the paragraphing, and I can remove the salute.
I appreciate the help!

Too tired to read at the moment, looks promising though.

This went a little fast, you might want to break up dialogue chunks, but otherwise, THIS IS AWESOME.

ah yes guard dash is best kind of dash, keep up this awesome story!

I want to put this out here now, I'm sorry this was so freakin' fast, I just want to get the first few chapters out of my way before I get into detail because I'm lazy.
I might edit it someday to make it better.
K, bye.:pinkiehappy:

This story is not popular enough.
It's at least 10 times better than anything I could possibly write, and its not even as popular as The Tale of Lightning Dash:twilightoops:

SO SHORT.
I didn't know what to do.
Twi and Dash never do anything together in the show, and any fics with the two of them together alone in a ship.
I know what to do with Applejack.

CIAHFOBIA.
May your skies be ever orange with fire.

1020157 Thanks!
I'm surprised I have as many views as I do.
And my Notifications is filled with "So and so favorited Equestrian Royal Guard!"
That's right.
I bragged on my own fic.:trollestia:

OH GOD.
SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING.
PLEASE, IT BURNS.
YOU MADE PART OF A SENTENCE INTO A WHOLE NEW PARAGRAPH.
THAT'S JUST WRONG
SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING SPACING spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing spacing...

1020198 Dear Princess literature:
I HAVE NOTICED THIS TOO AAAAAAAHH.
I'M NOT SURE WHERE TO EDIT!
HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
SOMEPONYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!:twilightoops::pinkiegasp:

I like this story, I can't wait for more.

And the Fluttershy tag is proven true!
New chapter!
Full of pain and sadness!
TOTALLY HAPPY.:pinkiecrazy::pinkiesad2:

CIAHFOBIA.:duck:

“I took an arrow to the knee.”


LOL

Now, what can we expect from a Pinkie Pie in a Twilight's house?
I HAVE NO IDEA!!!:pinkiecrazy::pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy::pinkiesmile::trollestia::moustache:

This was a little fast, and Twilight's and Fluttershy's personalities were a little off. But, other than that, no mistakes and a good chapter!

1063346
I know...
I'm bad at characterization that aren't created by me...

Six hundred more words than the last one!:yay:
Slightly better.
BUT NOT ENOUGH.

Finally have this chapter out!
At points, I think Pinkie was too Pinkie, and others I think she wasn't Pinkie enough.

I'm bad at capturing personalities.

CIAHFOBIA.

Oh wow I like this chapter. Dialogue is getting better and you captured Pinkie perfectly. I like that bit of foreshadowing with the reflexes. I can't wait for the training to start!
This story has been boosted from an 8.3 out of 10 to a 9.1 out of 10.
Which is amazing. I have very high standards. I only have 2 stories with a 10 out of 10.
My Little Dashie
Tiny Wings
Both made me cry. A lot.
And of course Wild Blue Yonder, which is a 9.8
Great read as well.
So this story is AWESOME.

1076644
Wow, thanks!

I don't know why I just thought of this, and why I didn't think of it until now.

Later in the story:

*Boom*.:rainbowdetermined2:

'nuff said.

Great story! The dialogue is really good and I absolutely loved how you used the song from 'Friendship Is Witchcraft'! :pinkiegasp::rainbowlaugh::pinkiegasp::rainbowlaugh:

Keep it up!

Silver out!

1077060
If you paid close attention, you'd notice I referenced Pinkie's brew!

1077070

I actually saw that line, great work again!


Silver out!

I wrote the first half of this chapter three days ago, and totally forgot about the RVB reference I had!:pinkiehappy:

Light red is TOTALLY NOT PINK.

And so begins the journey to meet her new teammates and friends.

Poor sad Pinkie:pinkiesad2:, losing one of her best friends.
Don't worry, we'll see them again!

IT'S FINALLY DONE YAY.
Why did I describe Rainbow take a shower?

I DON'T KNOW:pinkiecrazy::applejackconfused::derpyderp1::derpytongue2::rainbowwild::pinkiehappy:

CIAHFOBIA

Rainbow Dash doesn't know what hiatus means. She should walk up to Twilight and whisper, "What does hiatus mean anyway?"

1082560
Yeah, I kind of failed. I'll fix that.

Here it comes. I felt almost as anxious as she did. :pinkiesick::rainbowdetermined2:

Rainbow is in for a helluva surprise when she gets yelled at for the first time, experiences running around confused for the first week of training or the 30-45 second showers and 3 minutes to eat your meals. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Standing at attention for hours straight just because the instructors like screwing with you! I can't wait! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Silver out!

1082974
Oh, how much this would SUCK if I hadn't read the Halo books!:rainbowlaugh:
I would have no idea what I was doing... well, actually, I don't... but at least I know something!:pinkiehappy:

CIAHFOBIA.

If anyone cares, there will be another story about Fluttershy in the Nurse Corps. Not any time soon, but someday in the soon-ish future.:ajsmug:

Nevermind! Not a short chapter!
Almost 2000!
Better than normal!

Now prepare for a whopping more than 2000 words!
Probably 3-5000!:yay:

CIAHFOBIA

Interesting. What a great alarm clock.

1094785
Oh, military! You're a 'buck'in awesome alarm clock:trollestia::facehoof::rainbowlaugh:

1094992
I feel terrible right now. This amazing story has comments from 9 different people. That is just sad.

1095015
70% of the comments are mine.
It makes me feel better the more comments I have.

Other than the Equestrian military structure being screwy, I am really enjoying this!

Your dialogue is great!

...Oh, and if Rainbow doesn't get yelled at or something in the next chapter, I will be greatly disappointed. :fluttercry:

Keep it up!

Silver out!

1095306
Like I said:
Halo books.
And by reading those, I'm pretty sure it'll have too much yelling (If that is a thing :unsuresweetie:).

And it seems to me that you and Literature do not understand the concept of a wake up call.
A painful wake up call.
To the spine.

From another pony.

And totally not RD bucking herself.

Totally not a dream.

Totally not spoilers.

75% crap I did it again!:flutterrage::fluttershyouch::twilightoops::twilightangry2::derpyderp2:

It actually isn't spoilers.

I may be a moron, but I'm not an idiot!

You know, these are the kind of guards I like, not the ones that are all like "BLERGGH IF YOU SPEAK OUT OF TURN I'LL FUCKING DO BLOODY MURDER ON YOU"
Or whatever that means

Well, maybe not commandos, but you get the point.

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