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It Always Starts With Beer (Edited)2,603 words
One Night Stands Aren't Guaranteed (edited)2,691 words
9 Years Later (Edited)1,900 words

It Always Starts With Beer (Edited)

It's funny. When I was a completely irresponsible teenager (as opposed to the completely irresponsible adult I am now), and I was doing hormonal teenager things in the Stable, I used to be the easiest lay in the world. It's not something I'm proud of, but on the list of things I'm not proud of, it's only really in the middle. I will also say that when you're locked in an underground fallout shelter full-time, reputations like that circulate, so it didn't take long before I was getting absolutely none at all.

In one of my more desperate moments, flirting with... I don't remember who. Not even sure whether it was a mare or a stallion. I attempted to coax them into my clutches with the pickup line 'my parents aren't home'. This was entirely true, by the way – my mum was several years dead, my dad had fucked off to San Palomino at that point, and my brother had buggered off after him, leaving me with no legal guardians. If there was ever a dream situation for a desperate horny teenager, this was it.

It didn't work, though. Maybe at that point my status as the Stable bicycle was putting people off. Anyway, that's my awkwardly personal and undignified disclosure for the day. I hope you're happy. Let's jump forward to today, shall we?

I walked down the desert highway between the base and Isotope City. Nevada was up about five or so meters ahead of me. He was enjoying his morning walk in the crisp desert air. I was going to miss it when we headed out, but traveling in the desert was a winter thing. I looked up at the stars. The glow of the giant atom over Isotope City was becoming visible as I got closer. It made the town look radioactive. Fortunately the cutie mark on my butt didn't do that, despite the time I chugged nearly a gallon of water a day. Hey. you have to stay hydrated, and I walk to across a desert to get to work every day, I'm sure that stuff isn't nearly as clean as they say it is.

"Hey, Living Tumbleweed I'm here for my shift!" I called as I approached the gate to Isotope City. Yeah, I'm a security guard for Isotope City now. I know, the irony isn't lost on me. To be honest I needed the caps, and the Rangers were starting to lose patience with me, so Rainbow Code suggested I get a job somewhere else. Which was fine by me, because I was coming down with the most horrendous disease: boredom.

"For the last time Atom, that ain't my name!" The living, walking, sentient, bush that was now my employer called down to me. "If you call me that again I'm going to see if I can hit the atom on your butt at a hundred paces." Winchester poked his head out of the shattered window of the second floor concourse.

"Good morning Atom." Caliber poked his head out next to his dad, the helmet spun around on his horn. "Hey I got you a surprise!"

"Hey Cal, what are you doing up? I thought you were working for Sam. That means you get to sleep in now." I waved up to the stallion. Nevada walked up to the gate and started pawing at it.

"Well yeah, but... I wanted to get this to you first thing in the morning," he answered. "So I joined dad for the third watch of the night."

"Sorry to hear. Now are you going to let me in or not? Come on, Cal even got me something. You have to let me in now, Winnie."

"That's enough of that little Missy." Winchester pointed his rifle out of the window.

"Oh come on, Winnie, just let me in so I can start my shift!" The old walking hair ball pulled its head back into the closure. A second later the gate opened. I chuckled and walked in, the gate closing behind me. I walked up the stairs, and Winchester and Caliber were having a conversation. I could have sworn that I heard my name at least once, but I couldn't be sure because the two of them were keeping their voices quiet. I tried to sneak my way up the stairs to see if I couldn't eavesdrop on what the two of them were saying about me. I poked her head around the corner. Both of them were waiting for me. They both gave me this flat look. At least Caliber did, I wasn't sure what kind of look Winchester was shooting me behind all that facial hair. "Hey," I said with a sheepish grin. Nevada ran past me and ran around Cal and Winnie a few times before running over to his favorite spot. It looked like one of them had already put his food in his bowl.

"Really?" For some reason Winchester looked at Caliber. He only nodded once. "Eh, fine do whatever you want, you're not a foal anymore." Winchester sighed. He patted Caliber on the back and walked past me down stairs.

"Hey Cal, you said you have something for me?" I trotted over to the window and leaned against the wall. With a yawn I put my hooves behind my head. It's not like the caravans show up before sunrise anyways, so I could relax until then. I looked at that stallion. He wasn't bad looking today. I guess he did something with his mane or something.

"Yeah, I was out looking for parts for something special. Anyway. while I was out I found this. I thought that you would like it." He held out a small box. It was wrapped with a bow and everything. I chuckled and held out a wing.

"Right. And it came wrapped too, huh?" He put the box in my wing. Was he blushing? Was I? What the fuck was wrong with me? You would think I was a total spaz. He looked away. "It's fine, I was joking." He nodded with a smile.

"I know, just uh... go on and open it up. I-I think you'll like it, hopefully." He fiddled with his hooves. Nevada had finished his breakfast and had come over to see why Caliber was still up here with us. Cal patted him as I undid the wrapping. "I know that you like these, and I didn't know if you had this one or not." I opened the box inside was a pair of novelty shades. The frame was white, and the eye lenses were colored - one was red, the other black. In the middle of the black lens was a heart, and in the middle of the red lens was a spade.

"Wow! Awesome score!" I put them on. "This is pretty cool! How do I look?" I winked and struck a pose with my new shades on. Nevada barked his content at my new awesome shades.

"Amazing."

"Yeah, I am pretty amazing, aren't I? I love these. Thank you!" I gave him a quick hug and a kiss on his cheek. Was he blushing? Little hard to tell through the shades.

"N-no problem Atom. I-I should probably head back to town, and get to work at the repair shop."

"Sure thing, man! See you later." He walked to the stairs before stopping and turning around.

"Hey Atom, do you - uh... never mind."

"What, mate?" I idly patted Nevada.

"Would you mind having a drink or two with me at the bar later?" He gulped. "I mean, if... you want to."

I shrugged. "Sure, I mean, I was going down there after work anyways. We can call it a date, so you can flip the tab for me and I can get a few extra shots." The was no mistake. I could see him blushing from the other side of the room.

"A-a date." He had such a goofy grin on his face. The fact that I'd just explained to him that I was exploiting him for free booze seemed to have flown right over his head.. "Oh, and I like your perfume." He pushed his helmet up, and went down the stairs.

"Perfume?" I put my hoof to my nose and sniffed. "I'm don't wear perfume." Nevada barked a few times wagging his tail. He was happily content to just lay down next to me. He barked twice at the stairway. "Yeah, he's not bad. Once he gets some gumption he'll be alright." I returned to my slouch, and spent the early morning watching the stars and petting my dog.

***

It was around two in the afternoon when my shift finally ended. I say "around two" because I wasn't allowed to leave until the mouth breathing idiot that was the next shift showed up. Maybe there was a line at the brain cell rental that they all shared. I think that was why Winchester didn't let them guard the gate until the heat of the day. The morons would probably shoot at anything that moved. I hoped he took the bullets out of their guns, just to be safe. Anyways once the buffoon showed up, I headed down with Nevada to the town. There were a lot more ponies here than when I first showed up. Almost everypony was sleeping in the shade at the bar. Almost everypony. Cal was waiting at a table over in the corner. Nevada ran ahead of me into the shade. He looked almost normal when he wasn't wearing the silly jacket and helmet. He scratched Nevada behind his ear before putting some water down. Nevada gulped cheerfully.

"Sup?" I sat down at the table. There were two beers at the table already. I took one, popped the lid open and took a quick swig from the bottle.

"Well I-I uh. Well I was thinking that, um... you don't have an actual gun, do you?" I shook my head.

"Nope! Never really needed one. I've always been able to out-nerve anyone that came here looking to cause trouble." I took another swig. "You know Cal, a little liquid nerve would do you some good too." I grabbed his beer, and after popping the top of slid it over to him. He took a long swig, and put the bottle on the table. I was actually surprised that he took his alcohol pretty well. "Whatcha think?"

"Warm and old." He wiped his mouth. I couldn't help but laugh. He took another swig before continuing. "I was thinking, that maybe, well... maybe I could get you a gun, just in case you know you had to use it." He took another pull. "I asked around, you used to have a toy gun with special ammo right?" He was slamming that thing down, but the Dutch courage was starting to flow.

"Yeah, back when I was in the Stable and back in Manechester. I use to have this amazing Nerf™ gun, and I got these explosive darts from these to traders I met as soon as I got out of the Stable. They bit it, so I didn't even have to pay for them. Anyway, it's currently in an impound out east where a bunch of Rangers decided to play customs officers. Bunch of jerks." I chugged the rest of my bottle. He had already finished his.

"Yeah well, I wouldn't be able to get that one back, but I did find something while scavenging." He held up a hoof ordering two more bottles for us.

"Wait, you went outside the wall? Really?"

"Well yeah, Sam needed some things, and so he sent me out to get them. Folks is less jumpy these days." He took his beer bottle and started chugging it. I was having a hard time keeping up with him.

"Maybe you shouldn't drink so fast, Atom." The bartender told me. A couple of stupid traders from a nearby table chuckled. Cal and I chugged our beers in one go just to spite them. The buzz was really starting to hit me now. "Atom, don't you think that it smells a little sweet? Maybe you shouldn't be drinking." What? It smelled like it always did here - beer and sweat, maybe something else, it was hard to tell. But there wasn't a chance that I was going to stop. For once Caliber was actually being chatty, and he was buying the beers. After all, this was a date. Free beer and good company - no way was I passing that up.

"I'm fine, now two more bottles of your room-temperature finest." She facehoofed and mumbled something about not coming to cry to her. "

Cal smiled and got started on the bottle that arrived. The last time I was here they were a lot more tight hoofed about all their drinks. I guess they had a lot more in stock now that the caravans were coming in. I did my best to keep pace with him. At this point I was starting to notice the beer goggles kicking in, and he was starting to look less like a scruffy dork and more like a rugged scoundrel.

"Where was I... oh yeah! You had something for me. Gimme." I held out my front hooves for more gifts.

"Sorry Atom, I don't have it on me. It's back at my place, I'm working on fixing it up for you."

"Then take me to your house! I want to see the thing that you have for me."

"You should come to my place see what I have for you little filly." We ignored the greasy trader behind us.

"Well I haven't finished it yet. I just wanted to know if you had used a special Nerf gun before." I put one and one together.

"You got me a Nerf sweet, which one? Tell me! No, show me, show me! I want to see it."

"I don't know why I didn't think you'd figure it out. Maybe I'm a little drunk." He sighed. "I guess that I can show you. I'm heading home to go to bed for a little while." My ears perked up. I was still sleeping on a couch in what might charitably be described as a bombsite.

"Yeah, bed sounds nice!" I walked over the table and climbed on to his back, which was difficult and awkward, given that he was only a little bigger than I was. Take me to the bed!" I cheered. I was feeling a little bit warmer once I had managed to get onto Cal's back. My tail swished side to side trying to cool myself a bit.

"I'd take you to my bed filly, but you wouldn't get any sleep!" One of the traders behind us said, getting a gross guffaw out of his slimy buddies. Cal didn't answer them, he just stumbled around, trying to carry me on his back, while the drink started to catch up to him. I noticed his horn glow for a second before the chair under said trader pulled itself out from under him and he fell to the floor. I spat at him. Drunk Cal was fun Cal. The bar mare only sighed and facehoofed again. She was right though I was noticing a sweet smell. Was Cal wearing cologne? Was I blushing? Was this a good idea? I was beginning to doubt that going with him was a good idea.

"I've got a bit of whiskey at my place." I relaxed. Very good idea. Nevada thought so too, barking and walking next to us, wagging his tail.

Author's Note:

Caliber, Atom Smasher, Winchester and the setting were all created by hahatimeforponies and Fallout Equestria the original story was done by Kkat.
Fallout is owned by Bethesda.
MLP belongs to Hasbro please support this content creators.

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