October 24th - October 27th, the Year MCCCXLVII
October 24th, the Year MCCCXLVII
… I truly do not know what to say. How could I put words to how I feel at this moment? Elated? Terrified? Ecstatic? Petrified? No word I can conjure is good enough.
Actually, I may start with shame. I think my shock hurt poor Ford’s feelings. I certainly didn’t mean to do so. It just was… so sudden. I am still stunned, leaving me no option but to bring myself here to put my thoughts on paper. I cannot confide in Luna just yet, though I doubt she would be of great help for such a dilemma as this. She is too biased. Cadance, perhaps? She is busy with her family in the Crystal Empire, as well as assuring its rule. Let her rest. Besides, I cannot be influenced by any outside source. This decision must be mine alone.
I don’t really know where to begin. Is there anything I should say? Maybe I should just state the obvious, and perhaps the astonishment of it all will start to fade away…
Ford asked me to marry him. Of course that was his end goal through all of this. Not a position of power; that is not what I mean at all. But he saw it all as a courtship, a journey towards something greater. What else would he hope to see after these past two years?
The evening seemed all so simple. There was no great momentous build-up, no wondrous, romantic night. Just a normal, peaceful night together. We walked through the mountain caves, took refuge in the warmth of the garden where the early winter could not reach us. It was our place of solace, and though it was wonderful to be with him, I saw no indication of his motives. He was not particularly nervous, no signs of pre-occupation.
Oh heaven help me, how confident was he that I was to immediately say ‘yes?’ Did he expect some great rapturous delight from my side, or perhaps tears? I must have crushed him.
We had both said little through the evening, simply enjoying the presence of one another when he struck up a conversation. He seemed so relaxed- it must have been his lead-up.
“Celestia?” was all he said at first.
“Yes?” I replied.
“I probably have asked you this before, but do you love me?” he asked.
I laughed. “As if you need to ask such a thing,” I told him. “I love you more than anyone I have ever known.”
“Even though I am mortal, and you are not,” he said.
“That is true. Do you wonder if it makes me hesitant at times?”
“The thought has crossed my mind,” he confessed.
“It has before. Not any longer. Early on I did wonder, but now I have accepted my fate. I will love you to the end, no matter which end we face. I hope you know that,” I said.
“I do. Sometimes I just need to hear it to be sure. Today, especially,” he said.
“Oh? What makes today so important you?”
He had been facing ahead, his eyes focused on the horizon rather than on me. But suddenly he turned to look at me, an unusual focus in his eyes. Had he become nervous at that moment? “So you love me?” he asked again.
“Of course I do.”
“No matter what?”
“No matter what,” I assured him.
“Then will you marry me?”
I admit, when his words first met my ears, I did not truly comprehend the gravity of what he had just said. I’m sure he was hoping my reaction would be instantaneous, but instead my reaction was, “What?”
“Celestia, I love you, from the end of my days into eternity. And I want to marry you,” Ford said, a fire in his voice unlike anything else I had ever heard. “What do you say?”
Finally, what he was asking sunk in. My eyes went wide, my mouth slightly agape as my breath fled from my lungs. Marriage. A royal engagement. The soldier marrying his princess at last. An avalanche of thoughts rushed to my brain as the enormity of what he was asking truly broke through. I couldn’t think, couldn’t speak. It was not that I didn’t love him in return, but for it to have finally come this far...
Distantly I saw his face falter? “Princess?” he asked quietly. “I do need an answer here.”
“Ford…” I whispered. “My dear Ford, I- I don’t know if I can answer that question right now.”
“Is something… wrong?” he asked, his countenance plummeting. I began to panic all the more as I knew I had just destroyed him.
“Ford, the only thing wrong here is me. Simply the shock of it, I don’t know what to say. You do understand what you’re asking, don’t you?” I said to him. “What they’ll do to you when the truth is finally revealed?”
“I do. I’ve made my decision. I’m sick of skulking around and hiding as though I’ve something to be ashamed of,” he said firmly, regaining some of his lost confidence. “A long time ago, you told me I wasn’t the first to love a princess. All I’m doing is proving that someone does love you- and I want to for a lifetime.”
I was still reeling. Poor Ford, you deserved someone with more certainty, more grace and kindness than I offered- and less power. If only it had been so simple in my mind!
“Ford… I am sorry, I cannot answer that right now,” I told him. “I am truly sorry, from the bottom of my heart. I need to think this through, and give you the answer you deserve. You deserve a better moment than what I have given you.”
He struggled to keep his expression serene. I am certain I saw tears begin to form in his eyes. But when he spoke, his voice remained steady and calm, just as it had been all through the night. “Then perhaps this,” he said. “Let us be apart from one another for now. I will not press you for an answer. When you have made your decision, just… let me know. I will accept whatever you give me. At least I’ll know it is the truth.”
He left without another word, disappearing into the mountain and out of sight. I stood there, simply a bundle of wrecked nerves and feeling as though I had just destroyed my beloved.
I retreated to my chambers over an hour ago, and I am sure my evening pacing has left a trail on the wooden floor. I feel just as confused as I did the night he kissed me that night two years ago. I said I love him- and I do. So why am I so hesitant in all of this?
I do not think I will be able to sleep tonight. But I also doubt my ability to properly think through this at the moment. I will retire for the night. Maybe a fresh perspective on all of it will be revealed to me tomorrow.
October 25th, the Year MCCCXLVII
Every time. I swear, every time I try to sleep on a decision, I only allow the tumult within my heart to multiply. The only thing greater than my uncertainty is my shame! Oh Ford, I am so sorry. I wish I had simply said yes, but then I would not have given you the most truthful answer. You deserve the best I can give you. Right now, the best gift I can give you is not love but honesty, and that will take time to bring forth.
I love Ford. That I do not doubt. Not an immature, girlish thing, nor the passionate, quickly doused flames of a weekend fling. It is not summer love that exists only for a moment before disappearing in the coolness of winter. This is greater than the sum of it all, a deep, heartfelt thing. As steady and sure as the flow of a river, full of life and gentle as a spring rain. I love Ford more than I could love anyone else, in this age or the next.
So what is my hesitation? Partially, as much as I would like to not admit it, the uncertainty comes from what will be said of me. They will claim I seduced him, or that I bewitched him. It is a fair thought for the people to think- I am the Princess, they will say. I can do whatever I wish, so I took a young man from my Royal Guard and married him. Political ties may become weakened because of my decision. Those who see themselves as potential suitors will withdraw their support of the kingdom. Would the Griffons react in anger? Peregrine gave his proposal in earnest.
I hate to think such things, particularly when I should hardly be the focus of this rumination. What they will say of me is inconsequential in the long run. Far, far worse things will be said of Ford. Every rank he has ever gained will be called into question. His very position in the Royal Guard will be suspect, believing it all came because of his romance with me rather than his own skill. They will hurl insults at him, mock him, and throw everything they can at him in the hopes of destroying his integrity. His will be raked over the coals worse than any name in history, all for the simple crime of loving me. My blood boils just thinking of it. It is not fair to him at all! Ford’s boyhood love grew into the affection of a man, and all he has ever done is prove his worth over and over. He would not be deserving of the vitriol he would receive.
What would become of his place within the Solar Guard? Shining Armor, as the Crystal Prince, has come to lead the military. Would a position be made for Ford to do the same? It would only bring more criticism, saying that he married me only for a grab at power. If they dare compare him to vile monsters such as Sombra or Tirek…
He is young, in the political world. Ford may not truly be ready to handle what would be asked of him. Equestria’s first true Prince…
I can go no further tonight. I have laid out my anxieties so as to have them extracted from my spirit. I can do no more. Now I must ponder them, and finally discover my true answer.
October 26th, the Year MCCCXLVII
I have not forgotten. I am uneasy. Afraid I will act rashly.
But Ford and I crossed paths today. The longing in his face is undeniable. He was with his fellow soldiers. He could have revealed himself. I do not think he can stand waiting any longer, lest his feelings break him completely.
I must make my decision soon.
October 27th, the Year MCCCXLVII
I have made my choice. With help from an unexpected source.
I have made it a habit as of late to travel through Canterlot at least once a week. To keep myself well reminded of the people I serve, to remember how to cherish and truly care for them. It as a wondrous way to relax and simply let go of my royal position.
A few shops and other places are among those I have become familiar with. One of them being Rarity’s boutique, where I can often find a sharp-witted conversation in Sassy. She is intelligent, and has –though she does not know it- a well-refined sense for sleuthing. If I was to ever have a spy network… I am becoming distracted.
The weather became unusually blustery as the afternoon drew in, so I found myself retreating for shelter, and with the boutique nearby, I decided to visit a bit early- and in so doing found an unexpected surprise.
“Princess Celestia!” The gasp was so dramatic it could only belong to one woman. “It is a wonderful surprise to see you here, Your Highness! I am sorry for the clutter, if we had known you were coming!”
“You are perfectly fine, Rarity,” I said, a small laugh at the edge of my voice. How long had it been since I had last laughed? “I hope I am not intruding on anything important.”
“Oh heavens no, Your Highness, not at all!” Rarity said, snapping her fingers and sending a nearby box into the ether. “Is there anything I can help you with, or are you just dropping in for a visit?”
“Just a visit, I’m afraid. But please, if you need to complete any tasks, do not let me interfere.”
“Oh, we were just about to go through a new series of shipments, Your Higness,” Rarity said. “I’ve been trying to create a new line- have it ready for the spring, was my thought. Now that the orders have finally come in, we were about to give them a quick check.”
“A new line?” I asked. Fashion was not truly my forte, but I enjoyed hearing someone speak on a subject they enjoyed.
“Yes, my latest inspiration!” Rarity immediately began to fall under her own spell. “I toiled night and day, struggling to find my muse! Until at last, before I had lost all hope, my inspiration fell from the heavens! It was music to my ears, and suddenly I felt more alive than I had in years! It will surely be the talk of Canterlot for years to come!”
I held my laughter in check, trying my best not to hurt her feelings. “I am truly glad for you, Rarity. I know it means a great deal to you.”
“Rarity! I just received a letter!” Sassy appeared from the back of the shop, in obvious distress and yet to notice my presence. “The model from Manehatten won’t be arriving for the evening shoot, the train’s been delayed!”
“What? What happened?” Rarity asked, her attention now focused on this new problem.
“Late fall flooding coming from the north. They’re afraid to take the train over the bridge into the central region. Do you want me to call the photographer and cancel?” Sassy suddenly noticed my standing nearby. “Oh, I’m so sorry, Your Highness, I didn’t mean to ignore you so!”
“You are fine, Sassy, don’t worry about me. I am sorry about the train. Is there anything I can do to help?” I asked, sealing my fate.
“I don’t think so, Princess. It was all set in stone for us to do the photoshoot today, but with no model-” Sassy stopped speaking instantly. The two women looked at one another, dared a glance at me, and then stared back at one another. They were debating something silently, perhaps weighing the risks of the action.
“Princess Celestia,” Rarity said, her voice taking on a nervous giggle that so often plagued her during moments of duress. “I hate to ask such a thing- it’s quite unbecoming of me, really. But it is a bit of an emergency for us, and- well, the opportunity is right there, I don’t want it to go to waste. And only if you agree, we won’t force you- well of course we won’t force you, you’re a Princess, we can hardly force you to do anything-”
“Rarity, please,” I said, trying to cut through her worries. “It is fine. Please, what can I do to help?”
“Well, since the model won’t be able to show- and it’s too late to find a replacement easily… would you- would you be willing… to maybe model a dress or two for us?” Rarity asked meekly.
“Of course, I would be happy to!” I said pleasantly, hoping it would be a welcome diversion from my own thoughts. “Is there anything you need me to do?”
Rarity gave a squeal of delight and looked ready to faint. “Oh, Sassy, think of it! A picture of Princess in Celestia in- we’ll never be able to make enough of them!”
“I’ll go through the shipment, start selecting the best one we can!” Sassy said, eyeing my figure. “Princess, I hope you don’t mind, but we’ll need to get your measurements before we try anything on. We’ll want to have you wearing what will flatter you best, of course! It would hardly do for a Princess to appear poorly!”
The two ecstatic women practically dragged me into the back, ushering me to the side while they bent over a series of dresses that sat obscured in their garment bags, I unable to see what they looked like. I heard a few snatches of their muttering, and caught an occasional glance in my direction. “No, not this one. It doesn’t work… not enough curve on the waist, this one won’t do… we’re overthinking this… No, I will not settle here… This one? Yes, I think so, too. And so timeless!”
They set to work with a series of measuring tapes immediately afterwards. “Please, Your Highness,” Sassy said, taking a black bandana in her hands. “I know it is unbecoming of us, but before we can begin to put you in your dress, we will need to blindfold you. It is a bit of a thing of mine, not letting initial impressions ruin the dress. We’ll help you through it all, of course!”
“Very well, then,” I said, allowing her to tighten the blindfold across my eyes and my world went dark. As they began their work, my royal garments were gently taken away from my body and set somewhere aside. In their place, I felt a wonderful softness brush against my skin that felt as though water against my fingertips. I wanted to sneak a look at the garment, for surely something that exquisite to the touch must be glorious to the eyes.
“Please lift your arms, darling. Hold your hands out straight…”
“A quick breath, please. We don’t want it to be too tight.”
“Just stand still for a moment…”
“A bit more, I think… and there! We’re done! The blindfold is coming off now, Princess, just a moment, please!”
Suddenly my world regained sight and I felt a wonderful lightness all along my body, a sensation so marvelous that I wondered what it was made of. I turned to Rarity who was just to my side, and upon her face was a look of absolute awe. “Oh my,” she whispered. “Princess…”
“Is something wrong?” I asked.
“No, not- not at all,” Sassy said faintly. “Princess, just look over here, please…”
I turned and became rigid. It was a whiteness clearer and purer than snow. Upon my arms were gloves made of soft lace, ending just before reaching the shoulder. The neckline was conservative but daring, a jewel-neck style that flattered the breast but did not focus attention on it. The silhouette was hardly different from my normal attire, but the silken fabric glowed faintly in the light, as though the sun I represented had come down to shine upon it, with the gown ending at floor length, a small train just behind me. It was extraordinarily, unfathomably beautiful, and my heart seized at the sight of something so wondrous. “A wedding dress…”
“Yes, Your Highness! Oh, and it fits you perfectly!” Rarity said delightedly, jumping up and down where she stood. “I came to the idea months ago- what girl doesn’t want to feel radiant at her own wedding? I was having trouble finding inspiration, but suddenly I thought of you and your sister! Something serene, elegant, and a dash of timeless beauty to make it all work! Of course, this style is best for your figure, but I have others that are similar, for those wishing to try something a little more suiting to their tastes- Princess, whatever is the matter?”
I felt my face begin to crumple at the sight of it. The dress was flawless from head to toe, perfect in shape and form. It was the last word of beauty I had ever seen in such a thing. Any girl would be desperate to wear such a thing on her wedding day… including me. I could hold it in no longer and began to cry.
I didn’t think it was some trick to convince me. Rarity and Sassy certainly could not have known of my decision. The moment had simply come at the right time, as all moments do, and in this one, I was overwhelmed by a mixture of delight, fear, and grief that it had taken me so long to come to the one conclusion I had always known I would. As I wept, the two women gave cries of sympathy and came to my side, shushing me until the tears began to cease their flow.
“I am sorry. This is so silly of me,” I said thickly, pushing my tears aside. “I do not know what came over me.”
“Oh, Princess, you have nothing to apologize for!” Rarity said kindly. “Every girl wants to feel beautiful, including you! Just the passion of the moment, that’s all! A bit of the touch of romantic longing.”
She had no idea how true her words rang. “Does it still strike you from time to time, Rarity?” I asked.
“You can hardly imagine, Princess. It’s my only dream that may never be fulfilled,” she said wistfully. “The world’s still spinning, and I’m not getting any younger. But when I find my Prince…” she sighed, staring away blissfully. “I’ll cherish him for as long as I can. I promise that! Maybe you just felt the same, Princess Celestia.”
“I believe I did,” I said, a laugh growing in my voice. “I know exactly how you feel.”
“But certainly you must have suitors! Anyone would love to be with you, Princess!” Sassy cried. “I can only imagine how wonderful the moment would be! The whole world would come here to see you be married! Every man, woman, and child would adore you! Every man be envious of your husband, I can hardly dare to think of how it would be…”
"Oh, I can imagine it already! Princess, if you ever choose to marry, I beg you to let me design your wedding dress!" Rarity said, riddled with emotion at the very thought of it. "You wouldn't be charged for it, of course! Just to be the one who made your wedding dress would be more valuable than any gold or jewels on earth!"
I gave a hiccup, wondering if she already had designed it. "I'll make it a promise," I said.
We acted like silly girls the rest of the day, the photoshoot brief but simple. Rarity was nearly in tears the entire time, certain she would sell out the entire line the moment it was revealed. As the evening came across the sky, I said my goodbye and disappeared, flickering towards the garden. Should I summon Ford and announce it immediately? Keep it private until the proper moment? I summoned forth parchment and ink, trying to write a letter to summon him before simply throwing it aside and snapping my fingers, Ford appearing before me in an instant.
“Holy jeez!” he cried, likely having received the shock of his life. In his hands was a book and he stood in his civilian clothes, I hardly caring that I had likely made him vanish before his own friends. He suddenly recognized his surroundings, peering about wildly until his eyes settled on me. “Princess! What on earth-”
I kissed him so tightly that I didn’t give him a chance to speak, holding him close as though each moment we shared together was worth a thousand lifetimes. Finally, we broke apart, Ford stunned and delighted at my excitement.
So I told him yes. And now, we are left with a problem unlike anything he or I have ever faced:
How on earth are we going to break the news to everyone?
Stats
Page generated in 0.028 seconds
Total duration
1,039 users online
1,924,761 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Oh my, marriage!
OOOOooOOOOO... YEEEAAAAAAHHHHH BOIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love love love it. (I ought to, been married 25 years)
9595655
Damn, I'm envious. Well done!
9595742
For some of us, love is a hard thing to find. But that just means it will be worth it when we do find it right?
9848356
It does not have to come about. We are guaranteed nothing in this life, including a companion for the journey we take. Do not forget that, so that you may not waste your life waiting for a dream that may never be realized.
Live well while you can. Let the rest take care of itself.