Tapestry: A World Apart

by Star Scraper

Ch.02: Destiny and Death

The sun hung low over the horizon, bathing Sweet Apple Acres in amber light. The horizon was crowned with the oranges and deep blues of a late afternoon. A tired, sweaty Applejack hauled a heavy, heaping basket of apples towards a stack of crates sitting next to her barn. She dumped them inside, dropped the basket, and sat back against the barn to take a moment to rest her sore body.

"Applejack!" her ears perked as she heard a distant, familiar voice call – Twilight's.

She turned to the entrance of her hilltop property.

Spotting her, her alicorn friend cantered to her through the gate.

What does she want this time'a day? the workhorse wondered, getting on her tired hooves, approaching an open barrel of water, setting down her hat and splashing herself to clean off the worst of the sweat. She turned back towards the gate – Twilight's anxious face was right in her own, startling her.

"Woah! Oh-uh, hey, Twilight. What brings ya here this evenin'?" She reached down and grabbed her hat, putting it back on.

"Applejack – there's something I need to ask you about – something really, uh... big? Can we uh – maybe find someplace where nopony else will overhear us?" she nervously asked.

"Somethin' big you say? I suppose we could head over to the backhill. So it's really important, huh?..." As if showin' up at this hour didn't say that, her tone and face sure do. Gentle concern came over her voice, "Kinda private or somethin'?" She started walking away from her home, leading Twilight past the white fence around her barn and house, into the orchard.

"Well, I mean... That's the thing, I'm not sure if it should be private or not. I kind of want your opinion on that." She followed behind the farmpony. Though the hilltop where the Apple house and barn sat was still lit, the orchard was blanketed in shadow from all its trees, making them walk into growing darkness.

"Aiight," AJ acknowledged, then turned and yelled back at the farmhouse, "Got important friendship business, I'll be back in an bit!" she turned to face Twilight again, "they'd start gettin' concerned if I were out too late an' nopony knew why. Let's head on out -" Applejack glanced at the darkening orchard. "Oh, maybe I should head back and grab a lantern -" just as she turned, Twilight lit up her horn, casting a bright glow around them. "Oh. Uh, would a lantern be easier..."

"No, let's go. Lead on." The alicorn kept walking, passing her friend.

Applejack trotted forward a re-take the lead, slowing back to a leisure walk when she was ahead and guiding Twilight off the path and up a hill to the right. "Well, you know who you're talkin' to, right? I'm not one that's big on secrets. I mean, some things just ain't nopony's business, like, you know, some private things, but most things just ain't right to keep secret. Secrets just hurt ponies and friendships. So, uh... what kinda thing is it? And are you sure you wanna talk about it with me, sugarcube? I ain't one to sugarcoat things or tell ponies what they wanna hear or, well -"

"That's exactly why I want to talk to you," Twilight pressed, her breath getting faster as they began climbing the steep hill, "I don't want this sugarcoated. I want your honest opinion. And I've always trusted you to have kind of a... sensibility about these kinds of difficult decisions. I – I just don't know, Applejack, it's a really hard choice and it's just tearing me up inside and I want to make the right choice but so much is at stake. Spike thinks I shouldn't tell anypony, but he's so young – and the book is just there, hidden, but what if somepony stumbles on it – I could leave a note or a lock but if it's too short it might be ignored in favor of curiosity – when you really keep a secret ponies want to know even more and if I write a big long warning then what if whoever finds it just throws the warning away - " she began wheezing from ranting while climbing the steep slope, " - and the biggest thing of all is I can't protect – huff – everypony from it if they don't know what I'm doing – huff – and Celestia said all of you – my friends – have often helped me out so maybe she was hinting I should tell you – huff – but – oh I just don't know," she broke into long wheezes, suddenly slowing on the climb.

Applejack stopped, turned around and set a hoof on her friend's shoulder, "Slow down, sugarcube. It's ten times easier to climb the hill if you just breathe while ya do it. But since ya didn't we can stop for a moment for you to get your breath back," she politely explained, taking her hoof off only after the bookworm sat down.

Twilight just looked up at her, still wheezing, and gave a nod.

AJ sat in front of her, "Now, I don't know nothin' about this -" she waved a hoof in the air, "-so I don't know what you're talkin' about, to be honest. Celestia's involved? Protectin' everypony? This sounds like scary stuff. Honestly I was expectin' a different kinda 'secret' life issue but Backhill should serve just as well for this. So, explain it to me, but don't go windin' yourself this time," she got back up, waited for Twilight to stand, then led the way up the hill again.

"Well, remember that one time Rarity – or, rather, Spike found that 'Inspiration Manifestation'-cursed book, and it mind-controlled Rarity? -"

"Yep. That was sure a time and'a half..."

"-Well, I think me and Spike found something like that, but cataclysmically worse."

Applejack perked an eyebrow, glancing back, but kept walking and listening.

Twilight continued, "We were going through the Royal Sisters' old castle in the everfree and we found this book... It was secured in its own special secret chamber and protected, so I decided to write Celestia about it..." she kept pausing to breathe, "And she summoned us to Canterlot! She even gave us a pass to make sure even none of the guards found out about the book..." as she took a longer break from speaking, her down-to-earth friend piped in.

"Well what're ya doin' tellin' me? I mean, I'm no fan'a secrets, for sure, but if Princess Celestia herself told'ya not to tell... We're almost to the top'a this hill."

"Well, she told me I could... choose whether or not... to tell everypony. She told me... a lot of confusing things... about the book. That I had to read it at some point... to fulfill my destiny. That it was part of learning – that it would allow me to grow in some special way... That its knowledge was special – like if the world knew about it... they would 'clamor for it with armies', but that 'reading' it... meant going through some horrible thing, they said I couldn't comprehend the horror it would do to me... that the 'closest thing I could understand', is it would kill me... But it was necessary, for some reason, something to do with becoming an alicorn..." She looked on her back, flexing her wings.

"Speakin' of, I could'a just told you where we were goin', then you could'a flown up..."

Twilight shook her head, "No, I like walking with you. Plus, clearly I use my wings and magic so much I don't exercise my legs enough." She gave her a little friendly smile.

Applejack shot a "heheh, yeah..." and a smile back at her, then turned on ahead, breaking through a treeline. Just above was a single tree sitting on an otherwise barren peak. As they entered the clearing, the entire valley down below came into view, the orchard on one side, and the barn, house, and Ponyville on the other.

"Mighty kind'a ya. Now, to be honest, all that... I mean that just sounds like nothin' that makes sense. I mean..." she paused, carefully considering. It was the princesses sayin' all this

"...nothin' we humbler folk can make sense of, at any rate. Must be some kinda big princess thing about bein' super long-lived like they are and rulin' Equestria," she waved her hoof over the horizon, then set it down, and continued, turning back to face Twilight. "But that's kinda what you got goin', isn't it? Since you're an alicorn now an' all. But you said – it was necessary to become an alicorn – but ain't you one already?" humility tempered her confused tone.

"Well, yeah..." Twilight looked at the orange sun, halfway hidden under the horizon, slowly dipping behind distant lands. "I'm an alicorn, but I don't have the same sort of... presence as them. There's something very different about them. Maybe it's the centuries of age? The flowing manes? But that's not it either, it's deeper than that. They just have this air about them like a profound apparent serenity, this sort of majesty."

"Like somepony you really respect and admire?" Applejack suggested, finally coming to a stop next to the tree on the peak, sitting down, and patting the ground next to her.

Twilight walked up and sat down next to her while she spoke, "No, more than that... Granny Smith or any number of other ponies in Ponyville are respectable and admirable, but there's something... almost godly about the Sisters – Celestia in particular. Where does it come from? It sounded kind of like that's what they were talking about..." she mused on.

"So... what is it you were wantin' to ask me about? Whether to read it or not? I mean, ya said that they said that reading it was 'necessary', so ya gotta eventually, right?"

"Yeah..." Twilight looked away to where the sun had disappeared. "She said, since I had to read it at some point, I should keep it, and that's why I have it now. But she also forbade me from reading it because of how horrible it would be – but said I had to have that option to 'progress', and fulfill some kind of destiny. And here's what's been really bothering me, AJ... She said its security was my responsibility. Which means it's my job to make sure nopony suffers from reading that book. And I – I don't know if I should tell our friends. It would only endanger them, but at the same time, we always overcome our problems by facing them together, and if I don't tell you, I can't warn you about the books' danger... So I'm just so confused in all this, I can't decide! - so I decided to come to you for help in making this decision."

"Me?" she looked at Twilight, leaning back in surprise. "I mean, I got a reputable sorta, well, reputation, but uh... I'm not known for bein' the smartest pony in Equestria or 'nothin. Just bein'... well, hardworkin' and honest. So why'd you come to me?"

Twilight met her eyes, "well... you just 'got' this sort of down-to-earthedness -" her ears flopped as she tried to find the right words, then flipped back up "- this practicality. A sort of sensibleness. I've spun this thing in my head again and again and I just end up getting dizzy, lost and confused and I don't know what to do - I need your grounding."

"Well..." Applejack tipped her hat, turning to the sunset and leaning back, "I'm the Element of Honesty. Whatdoya think I'm gonna suggest? In my humble opinion, secrets just divide friendships, and whatever bad thing is in that book – we're all gonna need to stick together to face it. An' plus, if somepony comes across it and reads it, an' you didn't tell nopony, then it's your fault for not warnin' them. But if we've all been warned, then it's our fault for readin' it after that..." she sighed, then faced Twilight again with concerned eyes, "Look, Twi, most of all... ya need to trust yourself more.

"The princesses trusted you to decide what to do. My destiny is to farm apples, be a member of my Apple family, raise Applebloom an' my own little ponies someday, an' be best friends with you an' the others. But big, scary decisions like this... That's your destiny, not mine. I can offer my opinion, but really you need to make the decision. Your decision. An' whatever you choose... ya just gotta be okay with whatever happens. I mean, you gotta read that book sooner or later anyways, right?"

"Yeah, I just..." Twilight's gaze fell. "You should've been there. They said I'd die when I read it, and Celestia forbade me to protect me. She was comforting me the whole time and even gave me a hug. I just... I'm deciding to be obedient to her. But I don't want to die." She looked up at Applejack again, "I've got good friends, a good life, a loving family – I'm not ready and I feel scared, not like it's time. She said I'd know when the time is, and it's not now. So maybe I could read it and the danger to everypony else would be gone, but the time's not right." She looked back to the sun as it began to sink the rest of the way beneath the horizon. "And I hope it doesn't come anytime soon, either."

"I'm glad to hear that. I wanna be able to help you whatever happens. So are you gonna tell everypony?"

She narrowed her eyes, watching the sun disappear. "...no. I'd rather just... Hide the book. I don't feel ready. I'll keep it under the library. If nopony knows where it is, it's as good as non-existent, right?"

Why'd you come askin' for my advice if you're not gonna take it?... "Well, I'm glad you came to your own decision. But... Didn't the princesses say you gotta read it sooner or later? If ya got somethin’ -"

"Yes!" she yelled, then immediately threw her hooves over her mouth "- I mean, sorry, yes, they did..." her ears folded down and her gaze fell again. "I – I'm sorry, it's just, you keep reminding me and I... I don't want to die, Applejack, I'm not ready," her voice grew pitiful.

Applejack moved a little closer, then put a hoof around Twilight's shoulders to comfort her, earning a surprised look. "Look, sugarcube, I don't want that for you either, but... If'n the princesses said ya gotta read that book, then ya gotta, and puttin’ it off to later ain’t gonna change that. I don't think it's really gonna kill ya. They said it was just somethin' like that, right? I mean, when..." She paused. Her head bowed slightly.

"When pa, and then ma passed away... I would'a called that dyin', if I had to explain that to my younger self. It felt like I died inside. Like there was no reason to keep livin' anymore. I just couldn't live in Ponyville anymore – I changed my whole life around by movin' to Manehatten just 'cause I had to escape from my life. I couldn't have ever imagined how much that hurt before I experienced it, but... But since then..." she used her other hoof to lift Twilight's chin, and meet her eyes. Her own were shimmering wet.

"Since then I've learned what it's like to raise Applebloom. To become responsible. Granny Smith helped out best she could, but... losin' ma'n pa almost broke this little Apple family apart – we were mad, lonely, scared..."

She shifted around to face the farmhouse below, pointing at it while sniffing. "But now look at us. An' look at what we've become. How close we Apples are – that's no mistake. How honest'an hardworkin' we are – I mean, I don't mean to get all braggin', here, but – I got to be an Element'a Harmony! Just some random farmpony! That didn't happen on its own, sugarcube. It took some real hell for me to find out who I am, an' where I fit in this world, and become the pony that would stand shoulder'ta shoulder with you'n the others to defeat Nightmare Moon, Discord, Sombra, Tirek, an' everythin' else this world's thrown at us."

She turned back to Twilight, who in turn met her gaze again, "I guess I'm sayin' all this to say... Whatever it is the princesses got for you in that book, if'n ya gotta read it to fulfill your destiny, it's gonna be good, no matter how bad it is. If you make it that way. Now, the stuff I went through with my parents – I still miss'em, of course..." she paused for a moment "...so badly so... But we could'a just made things worse by gettin' all angry. By demandin' Celestia or Luna do some dark magic to bring'em back, or gettin' angry when they'd refuse – oh we could'a gotten so mad an' bitter an angsty...

"But instead we turned to each other and we made ourselves the warmest slice'a Apple heaven in Equestria, an' sometimes... Sometimes I feel like ma'n pa are just right here smilin' over us, so proud an'happy of what we've done, that maybe there was some purpose in those dumb accidents that took'em from us – that maybe it was Harmony's way of makin' sure our family would stay together an' happy forever... Maybe if they stuck around, we wouldn't be so happy'n together now. They would'a gladly died to keep us together like this, like they did, like we are. An' we wouldn't know what it's like to really love somepony, an' appreciate every opportunity to be best friends with our family if we didn't know what it was like to lose that opportunity..."

She sighed, bowing her head slightly. "An' you know... 'till you been through it, yourself, it probably just looks like I'm blabberin' on about nothin'..."

Twilight's ears flopped. "No, not at all – I get what you're saying –"

"No. You don't." She said sternly, then continued gently again, "Nopony can know what it's like 'till they gone through it. You can hear a pony talk about how wonderful a fresh splash'a water feels, but that don't mean nothin' to ya unless you spent hard days sweatin' your brains out in a hot, burnin' sunny field. I just... It makes so much sense if I think'a it like that. That's probably why that book is so great an' terrible. I'm sorry I got to blabberin' on so much, but... I don't think ya gotta be scared as you think you do. Just hang in there, an' you'll find, eventually, some meanin' in all'a this... I trust the Princesses. But... Do what ya gotta do. I'll do my best to keep this secret outta respect for ya. I wouldn't wish the pain I been through on nopony, 'specially not a pony good as you, Twi." She gave her friend a little squeeze with the foreleg around her shoulders.

"Oh... Okay, thanks. I – I... I know what you're saying, but I'll admit I don't understand it. I trust the princesses, too... but I just really don't feel like it's time yet - I’ll read it, but… now’s just not the time." Twilight gently said.

The sun had set, and crickets began to fill the air with their nightly chorus.

"Nopony should ever push ya into such a thing. I'm not sayin' ya gotta do it now or nothin'. Don't take me wrong, it's awful, an' it's not like we go lookin' for trouble – murder's still murder, an heaven forbid if I ever found out what happened to ma'n pa weren't accidents – so I can't go puttin' you through the same thing on purpose any more than it'd be okay for somepony to come along murderin'... so you take it at your own pace, nopony can tell ya when to read it 'cept for yourself. Just... I'm just sayin' when the time comes... Have some faith it'll turn out alright, okay, sugarcube? The princesses wouldn't give ya anythin' ya can't handle, terrible as it may be. They trusted ya with this, an' I'm sure they didn't do it without thinkin' about it."

Twilight took a moment to take in everything AJ said, then nodded. "Okay," she quietly answered her farmpony friend.

Long minutes passed with them looking down at the valley below, the breeze coming and going many times, and the dusk turning to twilight and slowly to night. The fiery orange hues of the sunset gently bowed behind the horizon, making way for the gentle, dark evening sky.

"Thank you, Applejack. It's... been a real night, and you know what?..." she turned back to her farmhorse friend, "I think I've changed my mind. What you said about the princesses trusting me..." she paused for a moment, then finally said it, "I think I trust you, and all the other elements, just like Celestia and Luna trusted me. I'll tell everypony."

Applejack found no words came to her. She pursed her lips as she thought, and just slowly nodded. After a few more seconds, the words finally came. "That's... a brave thing, Twilight. I can imagine you'd really like to just hide it away and pretend this all never happened, but... To tell ya the truth, I don't think I'd have the strength to face it, either. But I really think you're doin' the right thing. Hidin' it away is just dangerous... Thank you for trustin' us."

Twilight leaned into her. She flinched a little in surprise, but the feeling was familiar. She remembered a younger Applebloom snuggling up to her when she heard a frightening storm outside, or the Timberwolves howling at night. She put a hoof around her.

"Tomorrow morning, I'll tell you, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie what I know. Or at the very least, warn them that the princess kept the book secret and said it'd kill me if I read it, yet that I have to, and trusted me to keep it," Twilight laid out, determination meeting anxiety in her voice. "Yeah I'm afraid, but it feels like the right thing to do."

On the next day, with an anxious, racing heart as she addressed her five closest pony friends gathered in the map room, she would do exactly that.

Comments

[Star Scraper]

9119231
9127881
There were a lot of narrative reasons I really didn't want to just scrap that whole scene altogether, and the first of those will be apparent next week. But I do admit it doesn't have a lot of momentum nor offer a particularly sharp hook, unless the reader is explicitly looking for something deep about meaning. I do feel kind of bad not leaving it in the prologue to hook that kind of audience, but I think having a prologue with over 4k words might have been turning a lot of readers off, too.

So I've decided to make it a separate entry, as chapter zero. Hopefully that'll make more people willing to give the prologue a try, while not compromising too badly on things like establishing Rarity as a main character, where she finds meaning in life, and the largest overarching theme the story will eventually end in addressing with Twilight.

[Antiquarian]

Love Applejack's wisdom here, especially on the profound blessing that suffering can be. I'm reminded of this article on the subject, which delves into a statement from Tolkien on the salvific nature of suffering. It comes from a Catholic perspective, but I don't think it's inaccessible to non-Catholics. (Heck, it also talks a lot about Stephen Colbert, who I don't much care for, but I still find it profound). Loving this story so far.

[Star Scraper]

9687626
Thanks. I've really enjoyed your comments. If I got comments like these regularly, I probably would have finished the sequel by now, lol. Not even exaggerating, though.