Chapter 1: Opportunity
“You...quit?”
Slowly, the noise in the mailroom stopped. Conversations died down, letters gently came to rest, and everypony around the receiving area listened in, with only a few even trying to be subtle.
“Yep! I quit,” said Derpy cheerfully, her smile bright as she dropped her mailbag onto the desk. “Right now.”
Slowly, the mailcolt looked around the silent room, suddenly nervous as he saw the rumor mill already starting to turn. “But you've been working here for fifteen years. Why now?”
“Sixteen years,” corrected Derpy. “And I'm quitting because I want to leave this job.” Her voice remained cheerful, oblivious to the menacing aura that was building behind her, directed towards the supervisor.
“This...isn't because of the muffin ban, is it?”
“Nope!”
“You're not mad about the hour cuts, are you?”
“Nope!”
“If this is because of the time I shouted at you-”
“Already forgiven!”
Sweating now, the postmaster looked around the room for a lifeline. As a recent transfer from Manehatten, he'd immediately singled out Derpy for her less than stellar performance and accident prone nature, only to quickly learn how well liked she was by every pony that worked there. The week after he'd publicly taken her to task had been one of the most miserable in his life.
Lowering his voice, the stallion tried to keep his volume to an absolute minimum. “If it was anything I've done-”
“Nope! Well, I mean, you did make me cry that one time, but this isn't about that.”
The postmaster fought the urge to whimper as Derpy's voice carried to everypony in the mail room. Finally, he asked, “Then why leave now?”
“I've found a new job!”
“You did?” The surprise clearly wasn't his alone this time. “What place would possibly hire...I mean, we'll be very sorry to see you leave. Where are you going to be working now?”
Derpy straightened her posture, bringing a forehoof to her chest as she looked off into the distance. “I...am going to be a Royal Guard! Princess Twilight's Royal Guard!”
“That's...amazing,” said the postmaster, finally recovering from his shock. “Well, there will always be a place here for you.”
Flashing him a bright smile, Derpy turned, her tail flicking out and accidentally brushing against the coffee mug on his desk. Fortunately, the mug was devoid of coffee. Unfortunately, the mug itself landed precisely on a fracture point on the floor, the weathered boards breaking apart and making a hole. A second later, the leg of the postmaster's desk slid into the hole, the entirety of the desk tilting at precisely the right angle to send all of the papers and objects on it sliding to the floor.
The stallion didn't even bat an eye. “That poor, poor princess.”
---
“Position yourself exactly fifty meters from the entrance of the castle and face the door,” read Derpy aloud. “There will be a giant red X at your hooves.” Looking down between her forehooves, Derpy spotted the symbol on the ground and shifted her body so she was right in the center. “Wait there for further instructions.”
Nodding resolutely, Derpy rolled up the scroll and took a seat as she faced the door.
“Incoming!”
Derpy's head snapped skyward at the shout, her eye immediately catching sight of the orange and blue streak in the air, twisting her way through the clouds on a direct path towards her. Eyes wide, Derpy raised a hoof...and waved at the approaching pegasus as she wildly careened out of Derpy's path and crashed into the bushes beside the road.
“Are you okay? That looked painful,” said Derpy, still rooted to the center of the X.
With a groan, the orange pegasus pulled herself from the shrubs, knocking away several twigs and leaves from her messy blue mane. “Oww...why didn't you move? I could have crashed into you.”
Derpy held up her orientation scroll. “They said to wait on the X.”
“You're not supposed to take the instructions that literally!”
“Why not?”
“Hey you! Move it!”
The sudden shout from above, this time phrased in the form of actual instructions, made Derpy bolt from her spot. A second later, a green pegasus landed, kicking up a cloud of dirt as she touched down perfectly in the center of the X. “Heh. Nailed it.” She flicked her golden mane back behind her head and turned to the mare she'd displaced. “Who are you two?”
“My name is Derpy,” said the gray pegasus cheerfully. “Nice to meet you.”
“Flare Warden. Miss...?” asked the other pegasus, far less cheerful.
“Lightning Dust.” Her eyes passed over the pair, a small smirk visible on her muzzle. “Don't tell me you’re gonna be Royal Guards, too?”
“What's that supposed to mean?” snapped Flare, her eyes narrowing.
“Nothing. I just thought you'd need reflexes for a job like this.”
“We do?” gasped Derpy.
“That's funny. I thought social skills were more important.”
“They are?” squeaked Derpy, looking worried.
Ignoring the increasingly antsy gray pegasus, Lightning Dust pushed closer to Flare. “I'd at least think they'd want pegasi that can avoid crashing during landing.”
“They probably also want someone who isn't a total bi-”
“Um, excuse me!”
“What?!” Flare and Dust both yelled at the same time.
Derpy blinked and shook her mane as it was blown back by the dual shout. “Do either of you know who we're supposed to be waiting for?”
A moment of silence passed between them before Flare replied. “I guess I assumed Twilight would be meeting us here.”
“Why would she want to meet us outside the castle?” asked Dust.
“She doesn't. You're here to meet me.”
As one, the three pegasi turned to the new voice. A small squeak escaped Derpy as she saw the large, purple colored and black-armored unicorn.
Lightning Dust looked unimpressed. “And you are?”
“Tempest Shadow. And I'm here to kidnap Twilight Sparkle.”
Flare blinked. “You what?”
Without a word, the unicorn pushed past them and headed on a straight path towards the crystal castle.
“So...should we stop her?” asked Flare. “I mean, it's our job, right?”
“It's obviously a test,” scoffed Dust. “Just stand back and try not to get in my way.”
“Wait! Lighting, that's a really bad-”
Derpy barely had time to form the words before Lightning took off, zipping through the air fast enough to leave a trail in her wake, forehooves extended for a quick, powerful strike.
At the last possible second, Tempest shifted her weight to the side and rolled, Lightning passing above her, close enough to brush against her side. Tempest’s hind leg struck out, hitting Lightning in mid-flight and sending her spiraling into the brush by the side of the road.
“...idea,” finished Derpy, wincing in sympathy. Quickly, she and Flare rushed over to the bush while Tempest continued her leisurely stroll. “Lightning, are you okay?”
“Gah!” The foliage burst as Lightning Dust jumped not, nearly knocking Derpy over in her haste. “Lucky shot,” she growled.
“Was it?” asked Flare mockingly. “It looked more like she kicked your ass.”
Shoving Flare aside, Lightning spread her wings and crouched, readying herself once more. “I just underestimated her, that's all.”
“More like you're overestimating yourself,” retorted Flare, but Lightning was already gone.
Her path was far more chaotic this time, zipping back and forth around Tempest in a complex pattern of feints and glancing blows. Tempest didn't break her walking pace, but Derpy could see her eyes moving back and forth, tracking Lightning's movements. Suddenly Tempest lept, meeting her in mid flight and tackling Lightning straight out of the air as she flew above.
With her forehooves at her sides, Tempest pulled Lightning headfirst into the ground, and in the next motion her hind legs slammed into Lightning’s stomach, putting her down for the count.
“Yeah, you definitely almost got her that time,” mocked Flare, following leisurely behind the worried Derpy as the gray pegasus rushed to Lightning's side.
Groaning and rolling over, Lightning glared up at Flare. “Shut up! I'd like to see you do better!”
“Um, maybe we should try-”
“Not like you set the bar very high,” said Flare, cutting off Derpy as she stretched her wings. “Watch and learn.”
“-working together?” finished Derpy as she watched Flare take off...only for her to return a second later, hurtling past Derpy at precisely the right angle to send her crashing into Lightning Dust. Neither of them seemed in a hurry to get up again.
Derpy trembled. Tempest was less than ten meters from Twilight's castle now, and she was the only one left standing. But what could she possibly do against...no, she was one of Twilight's Royal Guards. She needed to be confident! She needed to be brave! She...needed a better plan, but there was no time for that now! Determined, Derpy flew past Tempest and landed between her and the door.
The surge of confidence quickly waned under the cold gaze of the much taller unicorn.
“Um...I'm sorry miss Shadow, but I can't let you go any further!” Derpy raised her hooves, readying herself, only to yelp as Tempest took a menacing step forward...and then a second menacing step right past her. The third menacing step left Derpy with her hooves raised against empty air as Tempest continued towards Twilight’s castle.
Derpy blinked in confusion. Had she just been brushed off?
“H-hey, don't ignore me!” She squeaked, firming her resolve before turning and leaping at the 'fleeing' unicorn. To her surprise, her tackle landed, her hooves managing to wrap firmly around Tempest's hind legs. Great! Now all she had to do was...um...
Derpy yelped as she found herself being pulled forward. “Wait, stop!” she pleaded, her body being dragged forward at Tempest's walking pace as though she were nothing more than dead weight. “H-halt! Stop where you are...please?”
Finally, the two of them came to a stop in front of Twilight's door. Raising a powerful armored hoof, Tempest brought it down against the castle doors...and knocked politely.
“Tempest! It's good to see you!” The voice of a familiar princess rang in Derpy's ears, and a moment later, Tempest was on her back hoof as Twilight hugged her tight. For the first time ever, Derpy saw a crack in her steely facade.
“We've been planning this for weeks, princess.”
“That doesn't mean I can't be happy to see you,” said Twilight with a laugh, releasing Tempest and finally catching sight of the scene behind her. Lightning and Flare were only now starting to untangle themselves and Derpy was still clinging tightly to her hind legs.
“Fizz...I thought we agreed not to do the Princess in Peril orientation,” chided Twilight gently.
“It was the fastest way to gauge their abilities,” said Tempest, sounding almost sheepish.
Twilight sighed. “So what did you learn?”
“Well...they've got a ways to go. I'd still take them over the Canterlot Royal Guards though.”
---
Lightning groaned softly as she held an ice pack to her stomach while casting an annoyed look in Derpy's direction. “So why didn't she kick your flank, huh?”
The uninjured Derpy squirmed in her seat, guiltily. “I'm sorry, I tried my best.”
“Maybe it's because she's not irritating or annoying,” retorted Flare, nursing her own ice pack against her head.
“At least I didn't go down in one hit.”
“I thought you were both really cool.” The bickering cut off abruptly at Derpy’s interjection. “She didn't even think I was a threat.”
Lightning and Flare shared a look, the two seeming to come to a truce of sorts in the second that passed.
“Well, we all have to start somewhere,” said Flare.
“Yeah, and besides, getting kicked really isn't all that fun,” added Lightning.
The door to the classroom-like area opened and cut off further conversation when Tempest entered, followed closely by Twilight. “Heads up and on your hooves! Salute your princess properly!” barked Tempest, her voice making the three would-be guards jump from their seats and into hurried salutes.
“Thank you, Tempest. At ease everypony,” said Twilight as she moved to the front of the room and behind a desk. “Thank you all for coming here today. You three are the first of what I hope will one day be a robust Royal Guard squadron for this castle. I know you might be wondering why there are only three of you right now, and the truth is, we're all a little new at this. Myself and Tempest included. I've worked with previous guard captains to put together a training course, but the only real way to see if it works is to test it, and that's something I hope the three of you can help me with, in addition to being my future guards.”
Letting her gaze pass over each of the three recruits, Twilight continued, “I realize we've all technically 'met' each other, but why don't we formally introduce ourselves?” Her eyes briefly paused on Lightning Dust, giving her an encouraging smile.
With a sigh, the green pegasus stood up from her seat. “My name is Lightning Dust. I used to work as a weather pony for Cloudsdale, and then I was a Wonderbolt Trainee before I decided to take a job here.”
“Thank you, Lightning Dust, I look forward to seeing what you can do,” said Twilight, nodding to the next in line.
“I'm Flare Warden,” said the blue maned pegasus. “Pretty much everypony in my family has been a guard of some kind or another, so that's why I'm here.”
“Do you have any family in the Royal Guards right now?” asked Twilight.
“Well, my parents are retired, but my brother Flash Sentry is one of Celestia's guards.”
Twilight's smile became strained at the edges. “Oh… him. Well, we're happy to have you.”
“You know my brother?” asked Flare, tilting her head slightly.
“In a sense,” said Twilight vaguely. “Let's move on.”
As the only one left, Derpy got to her hooves and smiled. “My name is Derpy Hooves. I used to be a mailpony, but then Twilight accepted my application.”
“Sorry to interrupt,” said Twilight suddenly, “But isn't your name Muffins?”
“Well… you could call me that, if you wanted to,” said Derpy with a slight blush.
Twilight fidgeted as she hastily checked her notes, stealing a glance towards Tempest who was absolutely not smiling. Not even a little bit. It was clear that Derpy wasn’t going to clear this misconception up. Clearing her throat, Twilight gestured with a hoof. “Please continue.”
“Right! Well, I don't have any experience as a guard, or family in the Royal Guards...but I've been a mail pony for a long time so I'm pretty good at flying.”
“Well, that's certainly a useful skill to have,” said Twilight. Finally, she nodded to Tempest.
“My name is Tempest Shadow, but you will refer to me as Commander Tempest. I’ve been a conqueror of Equestria and a leader for the armies of the late Storm King. I’m a villain in every sense of the word.”
Silence followed her statement. Even Lightning Dust seemed a little taken aback at that.
“But that's all behind me now. Today, I am the commander of Twilight's guards, and I am looking towards the future. I expect everyone here to be doing the same, becoming the best royal guard you are capable of being regardless of past failures, family expectations, or lack of experience.”
Pacing the room now, Tempest walked back and forth in front of the three pegasi. “For the next month, all of you will undergo intensive training. You will learn to navigate this castle as though it were your second home and develop a mental map of every corner and potential hiding place. The second most important thing to know as a guard is everything about the place you're guarding. I shouldn't need to say what the first is.”
As one, the three recruits shook their heads, all of them glancing towards an increasingly sheepish looking Twilight.
“Sounds easy enough to me,” said Lightning suddenly.
“Oh?” asked Tempest.
“Yeah, it's just a castle. Not even a very big one. How hard could that be?”
“Glad you asked,” said Tempest, walking right up to Lightning's seat and pulling out a piece of paper from the front of her armor before setting it down in front of her.
Lightning gave it a wary look. “What's that?”
“Your first assignment as a Royal Guard,” said Tempest with the hint of a smile. “Use this map and find the guard barracks.”
“That's it? That's easy. We'll meet you there, commander,” said Lightning, snatching up the piece of paper with her wing.
“Feel free to surprise me,” replied Tempest as she returned to Twilight's side.
---
Lightning Dust held her breath as she slowly opened the innocent looking door and peeked inside. It was dark, but she couldn't feel anything leaning against it, nor did she hear the sound of shifting objects. More confident now, she opened the door the rest of the way, the light from the hall spilling inside.
Her eyes widened as she saw exactly what the room contained. “Oh come on!”
CRASH!
Behind her, Derpy and Flare winced as a myriad of brooms, mops, buckets, and various cleaning supplies spilled out, burying her. A moment later, the pile burst outward, forcing Derpy and Flare to duck and cover.
“How many broom closets does this stupid castle have?!”
“At least four that we know of,” said Derpy helpfully, brushing off a mop head that had fallen over her eyes.
“And about six different studies,” grumbled Flare, kicking some empty buckets to the side.
Noticing that the map had landed next to her, Derpy picked it up and smoothed it out. “Maybe we're looking at the map wrong,” she suggested, slowly rotating the paper in her hooves as her eye moved up and to the side.
Flare glanced over Derpy's shoulder. “You've got it upside down.”
“Ooops!,” Derpy said while quickly rotating the map.
Flare's head tilted in confusion. “Wait, maybe this is upside down...”
“Ugh, gimme that!” snapped Lightning, snatching the map out of her hooves and glaring at it. Reaching a decision, Lightning turned to the door next to the broom closet and kicked it open before immediately flying up and away.
Flare peered around the frame. “Well, it looks safe enough.” And indeed, the room seemed devoid of cleaning supplies and books.
When it was clear that there was no collapse imminent, Lightning landed and entered the door. “Finally! Now where the heck-”
BHWEEEE!
A loud bang echoed throughout the hallway, making all three of them jump and recoil. Party streamers erupted from the innocent looking room, followed by a shower of confetti. By the time the brightly colored paper settled, almost none of Lightning's fur or mane was visible.
“Ohh...so that's what 'Party Room' means,” said Derpy as she looked at the map that had been blasted back into her hooves.
“Buck this, I'm going outside!” Shaking off the party favors, Lightning took flight. “We're just wasting our time here.”
“Try not to get lost finding the exit!” shouted Flare after her retreating form. “Sweet Celestia that mare is a piece of work.”
“Well, getting lost can be really frustrating,” said Derpy sympathetically as she studied the map. “It happened to me a lot when I was first starting out as a mailmare.”
“I feel like you're giving her too much credit,” grumbled Flare. “Still, for a princess famous for being organized, there's a real lack of signs around here. Seems like we've run into more dead ends and useless rooms than anything else.”
“You know, it kinda reminds me of Discord's place,” said Derpy with a nod.
“Discord's...place? That 'thing' actually lives somewhere?”
“Yep!” said Derpy with a smile. “I've delivered mail to him plenty of times. His place is full of dead ends, pointless rooms, and magical traps.”
“Huh, do you think Discord is messing with us now?” asked Flare curiously.
“Well...no, but it’s a magic castle, right?”
Flare paused for a moment, looking between the two opened doors. “Okay, let's assume for a moment that this castle is giving us the runaround. How do we beat it? It's not like either of us can use magic.”
Derpy shrugged her wings helplessly. “We could ask a unicorn for help.”
“That would kinda defeat the whole purpose of the test,” said Flare, only just managing to keep the exasperation from her voice. “How did you get around Discord's place?”
“Um...well, usually I just wandered around and ran into things until Discord showed up and said he felt sorry for me.”
Flare sighed. “Okay, we'll file that under plan B. Got any other ideas?”
Derpy scrunched her nose as she really put her mind to work, her left eye slowly rolling back towards the center. “Maybe?”
---
Lightning growled as she kicked a nearby cloud into vapor. Far from helping her calm down, she only felt more frustrated. The only point of reference on the outside of the castle was the balcony, and even that seemed to shift position every time she circled the place.
“Fresh start my ass,” grumbled Lightning, slumping backwards onto the last unburst cloud. “Just another test I was set up to fail.”
“Lightning!”
Wincing slightly at the overly cheerful voice, Lightning peeked her head up above the cloud. “Easy Lightning, you want to keep this job, remember?” she muttered to herself before Flare landed next to her. A hoof length's behind, Derpy landed face first, briefly burying her upper half in the cloud before pulling herself free.
“What are you doing here?” asked Lightning finally.
“Dunno,” said Flare, pointing a wing at Derpy. “This was her idea, not mine.”
“We figured it out! Twilight's castle is magic!” said Derpy, shaking away the cloud vestiges clinging to her face.
Lightning’s eye twitched. “Yes Derpy, I'm well aware.”
“No, not that kind of magic. I mean, the weird kind of magic. The kind that makes it impossible to navigate!”
“What kind of stupid magic is that?”
“Well...we were kinda hoping you would know,” admitted Derpy, pressing her forehooves together as she looked at Lightning with hopeful eyes.
“Do I look like a unicorn to you?”
“Well...no, but you're a super good pegasus!”
Ignoring the sight of Flare gagging, Lightning smirked. “Well...you're not wrong.”
“Does that mean you have an idea?” asked Derpy eagerly.
“I've got one better. I have a plan. Is there any place in Ponyville where we can get a bunch of yarn and tape?”
Flare stared at her. “Seriously? You think something like that is going to work against the power of a magic castle?”
“Got a better idea?” retorted Lightning.
“...Carousel Boutique. Rarity always has extras,” said Derpy helpfully.
---
“You know, they're probably going to make us clean this up, right?” said Flare irritably, shifting carefully to balance the dozen or so balls of yarn on her back.
“You won't have any trouble finding a broom closet then,” Lightning shot back as she affixed another piece of yarn to a door with tape. Behind both of them, Derpy slowly walked, trailing yarn behind her to mark their path.
“Why am I the one carrying everything?”
“Because for one, it's my plan, and for another, Derpy dropped a ball of yarn in Rarity's shop, caused one of her customers to trip into a mareiquinn and topple over nearly two-dozen displays,” said Lightning flatly.
“Oh...so that’s what all that shrieking was about,” murmured Flare.
“I just don’t know what went wrong,” Derpy said for what was the third time today.
“Point is, I'm not trusting her to carry more than one thing at a time,” concluded Lightning.
“I do fine when it's a bunch of things in one bag,” insisted Derpy.
“We could have asked Rarity for help. Twilight's friends visit her here, right? They have to know what's going on with the castle. It's not like Commander Tempest forbade it,” Flare complained.
“Yeah, that’ll look real good to the Commander,” said Lightning with an eyeroll as she marked off another door. “Might as well give up at that point.”
“Pretty sure you already crashed and burned your first impression,” retorted Flare.
“Um...girls?”
“Not like you did much better. I got up after I got kicked down though.”
“Girls?”
“After charging in recklessly without assessing the situation.”
“You know you'd still be wandering around like an idiot if you didn't-”
“Girls!”
“What?!” Flare and Lightning both yelled at the same time.
For the second time that day, Derpy found herself nearly knocked over from the force of their shouts. Fortunately, she'd managed to brace herself this time, although the ball of yarn she'd been holding was blown away, rolling down the hallway before hitting a slight groove and turning at a sharp angle down the stairs, right as Spike was coming up said stairs with an armful of scrolls.
Ignoring the yelp, the crash, and the gout of flame that erupted behind her, Derpy stood completely still. “We missed a door. It's right behind me on the left wall.”
Lightning's eyes narrowed. “I don't see anything. Where are you looking?”
Without moving her head, Derpy gestured with her hoof. “Whenever I try looking at it, I can't see it.” Her left eye was rolled up almost entirely to the far corner.
“Wait, Lightning, close your eyes,” said Flare suddenly.
“How the heck is that going to-”
“Just trust me,” Flare interrupted. “Now, Derpy, use your voice to guide her to the door.”
“I'm starting to think this stupid castle doesn't want guards,” grumbled Lightning as she closed her eyes and pressed her hooves against the wall.
“Okay...left, a little further left...no wait, my left...no, my other other left.”
“Derpy...” growled Lightning.
“There! You're touching the handle!”
Cautiously, Lightning opened her eyes, her head slowly looking at the unmarked door in front of her. To the left and right were two doors, both with a piece of yarn taped to them. “I really hate this castle.”
“Well, at least your plan almost worked,” said Flare while she approached the door with a bright pink yarn ball in one hoof and several strips of tape in the other. “Just pin that there, tape that here, thread the S and...ta da!”
Pulling away, Flare revealed her work, a large squiggle of pink cursive letters that spelled out the word 'Barracks' across the door.
“Great. Now we just need to do that for the other five hundred doors,” said Lightning as she reached for the door handle, only to suddenly jump away as the door was pushed open from the other side.
“Fifteen minutes slower than I was expecting,” said Tempest, looking at each of them in turn. “I will be sure to adjust my expectations accordingly.”
“You expected us to wander around this castle for forty-five minutes?” asked Flare incredulously.
“Yes. It’s a magic castle after all.”
“You don't say,” groused Lightning.
Turning, Tempest beckoned them inside a rather spacious room with beds lining the walls. “Pick any bed you want as long as it's those three in the corner.”
“Huh? But there are beds everywhere,” pointed out Flare.
“And you don't get any of them except those three,” repeated Tempest.
“Right, got it.” Taking to the air, Flare landed on the corner bed while Derpy crawled onto the one next to her, leaving the opposite one for Lightning.
“Don't get comfortable,” warned Tempest. “Orientation isn't over yet. Until you can navigate this castle without yarn and tape, you're going to be useless as a guard here.”
“Yeah, okay, but how?” demanded Lightning. “None of us are magic users.”
“Never been a problem for me,” said Tempest, turning and letting a few sparks fly from her broken horn. “But if you're not feeling confident in yourself, the castle will happily show you the way out. Entrance hall, ten minutes. And pick up your yarn trail on the way down.” And with a final flick of her tail, she was gone, the door to the barracks closing firmly behind her.
“You know...she's pretty cool when she's not trying to take over Equestria,” said Derpy cheerfully.
Flare and Lightning groaned.
---
“I told you not to meet me here. This place is being watched.”
“By who, the janitorial staff? This is your office. Why wouldn't you take meetings here?” asked the exasperated pony across from him. “Wouldn't it be more suspicious if you were meeting people outside of your office?”
The elderly unicorn fought the urge to sigh and rub his head. Such a thing would be undignified for a pony of his position after all. “Was there something you wished to say?”
“Yeah, you're gonna wanna take a look at these,” said the standing pony, levitating three photos from his bag and spreading them out on the desk. “You're looking at Twilight Sparkle's new Royal Guard force.”
The unicorn's eyes widened as he picked up each of the photos in turn. “When did this happen?”
“Like...a day ago? Today was orientation day.”
The gray maned unicorn frowned. “This is a problem.”
“Why?”
“What?”
“Why is it a problem? You're trying to break into a castle that houses Twilight Sparkle, Starlight Glimmer, and Tempest Shadow. Three of the most dangerous magic users in Equestria. What difference are three pegasus guards going to make?”
“I don't know, and that's the problem,” replied the pony behind the desk. “I have plans for Twilight and her entourage. I do not have plans for these three, and therein lies the problem.”
The standing pony sighed, forced to concede the point. “What do you want to do then?”
“For now, we observe. Watch them carefully. Learn their habits and report everything back to me. One way or another, our plan will move forward, but I have not come this far by being careless.”
“Right, of course,” said the standing pony, already mentally planning out another several days of tedious surveillance.
“And from now on, you meet me in the cafe across the street.”
“You know you're far more conspicuous in public, right?”
“I mean it.”
“Fine, but you'll be picking up the bill. Hey, don't look at me like that, you're the one getting a government salary here.”
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Well, this is definitely an interesting idea... I'm looking forward to see where it goes.
Wonderful to see this up!
I somehow guess that Tempest was part of some secret test.
Give me a thumbs up if you guessed that as well.
This is good, i like it.
Hope to see more of this soon.
I was with you right until you made a negative remark about Flash Sentry.
My god, the meme needs to be dead. Let it die.
I am ammused by there antics
9527169
What negative remark did you mean?
So Derpy I can see how she's going to be helpful. A mix of friendly peacemaking, insight, and utter chaos. Imagine that accident power applied to invaders...
Now we just need to see what Lightning Dust and Flare Warden bring to the table.
It's understandable why Derpy is qualified. She's already demonstrated a willingness to take a bullet (aka petrification spell) for Twilight. I'm surprise Tempest didn't remember that. Add to this the obvious chaos she can unintentionally create and the bad guys are going to have a rather bad time of it.
9527169
The fact you react like that is part of why people still dislike Flash. His fanbase is defensive to the point of cringe. You jumped the gun on trying to put down this story and author over Flash Sentry. And most importantly?
Unless we're talking about an 'Author Mouthpiece' issue, the author is NOT THEIR CHARACTERS.
An author can write about Twilight Sparkle not liking Flash Sentry, hating his guts even, but be a nutso-for-him fan. Let alone this OC of theirs is Flash's sister so they likely don't hate Brad all that much - if at all. Twilight's not even confirmed to dislike Flash yet. You come out looking like a jerk, instead.
9527543
Well said.
Also as one could point out. This is pony Flash. A stranger. I imagine it's as awkward of a thing for Princess Twi and Pony Flash as it was for Sci-Twi and Human Flash.
Ohh tracked. This looks interesting.
You have my attention.
I will be keeping an eye on this.
This is something I'll certainly enjoy reading
I would say something about "regret" with these, but... Let's face it - it'll be an interesting journey regardless.
Wait I know this story I met you at ever-free northwest! You were part of the group I was in with my gf at the time.
9528385
Glad to see you still remember it! It took me a while, but I finally got it up and working. If all goes according to plan, you should have the whole story by the time the next Everfree Northwest comes around. I hope it was worth the wait.
9528546
Yeah, I'll have to find time to read this when I can. If you noticed I put the story I mentioned at Ever-Free on a long hiatus I got other more popular stories grabbing my attention. I took a lot of what was talked at EF and applied it to my writing. Anyway, keep up the good work I look forward to seeing more.
9527587
IF he's a stranger, then why did Twilight speak with a dismissive tone about him?
9529051
I am not sure what you expect her to say? Twilight’s life is pretty weird even for a pony.
vs what we got:
But to be more serious. Flash is not a bad character. He got a lot of hate in the day as an extension of backlash against Hasbro of trying to turn twenty-something hero and co-ruler princess Twilight into a high school girl blushing and stammering and wedging in a save-the-damsel plot when Twilight in every other situation has been competent.
But Human Flash as a character himself? He helped out a cute girl he saw once. Danced with her and oops turns out she’s a magical horse girl. Oh well. Happens to the best of us.
What did Pony Flash do wrong? He bumped into Twilight once and gave her a smile of acknowledgment in a random two second appearance in an episode. He doesn't deserve the hate he gets and I'll be the first one to tell you.
But I’ll bring back to what you said about the story before:
That’s a bit worrying? The bar is that a negative seeming remark can’t be said about Flash, ever, in any context?
If that’s the case you’ll likely never see Flash used in stories because if people have to walk in eggshells or else they get downvoted why go through the effort of ever trying to give him characterization or interaction?
I won’t spoil anything that happens in the story, but… look at the description. Flare’s relationship with her brother is literally written out there. Throwing a downvote on a kneejerk to saying this fic is bashing Flash when his sister is a main character and their relationship a story plot point is heartbreaking. Maybe see where the story takes it before passing judgment? I hope you give it a chance.
9529438
9529051
It was a two-sentence throwaway gag. Do we really need to fight about this?
Mmkay, I'll bite and see where this goes for awhile.
It's really nice to see this make it to publishing at last; the stories we sit on for ages trying to get right are the ones that mean the most.
I liked how it felt like a cartoon, matching the show in tone with the slapstick moments. I'm a little wary about the inclusion of an OC, but she's been fairly harmless so far. This is definitely a nice take on Derpy
9527664 Actually, it's a Fave. I'll read later
Derpy is clearly the superior guard they should just pushing her into the mirror pool so she can guard the whole castle by herself
It's rare that I favorite a story on just the first chapter by itself. Usually if it looks interesting the story goes under tracking. You had my curiosity, and now you have my attention.
Also I read through looking for the supposedly "negative" comment about Flash and saw nothing worth whining about.
9529438
You... You do realize that she literally ran into his pony form? And blushed about it. And the girls teased her about it.
9529679
I don't really call this a fight. So far we haven't thrown insults. I've stated I'm tired of the meme in the fan of and they are defending it.
9532968
I addressed this in my post? I wrote:
I know my last post was a little bit on the long side, but the TLDR was that I agree that Flash doesn't deserve hate in either version of him.
But if you think this fic is bashing him, it's not. You said before you were liking this fic. I rather you not give it up on a perceived fear or make people think its going to trash someone when it doesn't. Really, give it a chance!
"To be fair, I did give them all the day off for the Festival of Friendship."
"And decisions like that are why you're not in direct command of your personal guard."
"I didn't want Starlight Glimmmer either, but no one asks me how I feel. They just fill my hallways with yarn."
In any case, odd choice in introducing Flash's identical twin sister, but you definitely have me intrigued. Looking forward to more.
Good start so far. Although the part where they have to find the barracks was a bit confusing. And I wish we could've seen more of Flare Warden's personality, but I feel like we'll see more of it shine as the story progresses. It does make me wonder why these three specifically decided to become guards to Twilight, like what their motivations are.
And then Tempest Shadow tries to take over one of the Grimdarkquestrias... and is impaled by 500 crossbow bolts the instant she strides down the ramp of that (horribly 1990s-level CGI-animated) airship.
It's mental images like that which always bring a smile to my ancient, withered face.
But really, the movie didn't even try to make it's plot make sense.
9538933
*Her eye twitches as she spots a possessive "it's".*
9620460 Best you just ignore Alondro. He's been a blight on this website for a very long time. You wont ever persuade him (her? it?) that the grammar that was used was wrong.
9623647
I mean at least it's better than that TheRedButcher guy who openly insults authors that have any forgiveness in their stories. Sometimes even if they don't have forgiveness in their stories.
9538933
if it was grimdarkquestria she wouldn't do that in the first place you clown
9629034
Well then
Glad i joined in the later years