Three Heads are Worse Than One

by ShadowedKnight68

Three Heads Clash

Joshua and...Joshua were now laying on the ground waiting for their third roommate sharing their body to wake up.

“So...you wanna tell him when he wakes up?” The tiger head Joshua asked.

“Hello no, I got a headache just trying to explain it to you” the goat head Joshua said back with a frown

“Ughhh fine” he huffed and waited for the third head to wake up, the main noise heard was the third head snoring loudly “jeez do we really snore that loud??”

“How should I know? We're asleep when it probably happens” the goat Joshua replied.

“Well now we're awake and it's really annoying, I'm gonna wake him up” tiger Joshua said and nudged the third head before the goat head could stop him.

The snake head suddenly blinked his eyes open waking up, he lifted himself up yawning, he then looked at the two of them his mind slowly starting up, when it finished his eyes went wide and he screamed.

“Ah damn!” Tiger Joshua groaned as his ears laid back on his head from the loud screaming.

“Nice going numbnuts!” Goat Joshua yelled as he laid his ears down as well.

Tiger Joshua growled and yelled at the snake head “shut up already!!!”

He shut up instantly and was shaking “w-what do you two want with me?? Ssss” he looked around for the source of the hissing.

“Well first we don't wanna hurt you, second your attached to us, and third we're all the same person” tiger Joshua said nonchalantly.

The snake head Joshua blinked for a second before slowly looking down and finding himself connected to the body of the heads as well as seeing he was just a snake “what?...what?...WHAT?!?!” he started flailing around panicking but since he was just a snake he just wiggled around “my armsss are gone!!!!”

“Real nice moron, you really helped calm him down” goat Joshua said sarcastically.

“Hey I didn't want to spend an hour trying to ease the surprise onto him, might as well cut to the chase and get it over with, like ripping a band-aid off” tiger Joshua growled.

Snake Joshua was looking at the two with one eye twitching “thisss issn't happening” he hissed uncontrollably which didn't help his panicking.

Tiger Joshua and goat Joshua were butting heads now both growling at each other.

“Wait if your both me why are you two girlsss?” The snake head questioned.

“I was wondering why miss goat over here was a girl too...wait you two? I'm not a girl!” Tiger Joshua yelled at the false assumption.

“I'm a girl?!” The goat Joshua yelled as well.

“Yesss well...I think...both of you have girlisssh featuresss…” snake Joshua said looking between the two.

“Mirror! I need a mirror!” Tiger Joshua said panicking.

“We're in the middle of the god damn forest!!” Goat Joshua yelled both panicked and annoyed.

Tiger Joshua looked around before spotting a puddle not to far away “there!” he went to run to it but was yanked back when the rest of his body didn't follow “dammit you two!”

“Don't look at me, I've been trying to run thisss whole time but I can move my legsss...or armsss” snake Joshua said sadly.

“I didn't know you wanted to move, you do realize you need to tell us when you wanna do something right? We're all stuck to the same body and me and you seem to be the only ones who control the legs” goat Joshua huffed and lifted his side off the ground with shaky legs.

Tiger Joshua did the same with his side “ok...this is gonna be hard but let's do it together, I'll move my front leg, then you move your back, then I move my back, and you move your front, then just repeat k?”

“Sounds easy enough” goat Joshua said looking down at their shared paws.

“What do I do?” Snake Joshua asked.

“Well unless you got telekinesis and can levitate us over to that puddle just sit there and be a tail” tiger Joshua said not even looking at him

Snake Joshua glared “fine…”

“Ok on three, one….two…. there” tiger Joshua said as he moved his front leg.

Goat Joshua then moved his back leg.

The two of them continued this slowly making their way to the puddle, all while the third head sat there frowning annoyed that he was basically a passenger to them, the words tiger Joshua said still running through his mind until a wicked smile grew across his face, he proceeded to move himself down towards their back legs and wrap around them, the moment they tried to take another step they tripped sending them all to the dirt.

Tiger Joshua slammed his chin into the dirt “gah fuck!” He turned his head back glaring.

“Oh what happend? I'm sssorry I wass bussssy being a tail” he said innocently.

“I'm gonna kill you!!” He lunged at him but couldn't reach.

“Oh it'ss like a dog chassing it'sss tail” he cooed.

“ARGHHHHHHH!!!” Tiger Joshua roared trying to get him.

“God you two…” goat Joshua huffed putting his paw on his cheek.

---

After a few minutes tiger Joshua tired himself out trying to bite snake Joshua, he was left panting “ok...ok I quit…”

Snake Joshua smirked at his win.

“Cool can we get to the puddle and see ourselves now?” Goat Joshua said as he finished building a fourth little rock tower to pass the time.

“Yeah let's go” tiger Joshua said standing his side up.

Goat Joshua followed doing the same and they continued their walking process. Now unimpeded by their their head who simply just laid on their back bored, angry, and sad at his lack of limbs and options.

The group finally made it to the puddle and proceeded to look into the brown water, the reflection showed three female animal heads, one a tigress sabertooth, the second a goat with tusks protruding from her bottom lip as well as two gold hoop earrings in her floppy ears, and the third a green snake with red eyes, each spotted the same shock and scared expression.

“No...nonononono no!!” All three said at the same time as they shook their heads.

“Come on!! First I'm stuck with two other mes in the same weird animal body, now I'm also the opposite gender?!” Tiger Joshua yelled.

“Ughh I hate goats…” Goat Joshua whined.

“Atleassst you two fuckersss got armss and legssss!!! I'm a ssssnake!!! And I got thissss ssstupid hissssss!!!” Snake Joshua thrashed around in anger.

Goat Joshua rubbed her face with her paw while looking at her reflection frowning, she pulled on one of the hoop earrings in her ear “why would a goat even get it's ears pierced?”

“Don't farmers do that to their goats?” Tiger Joshua asked.

“Yeah but usually a tag, not a golden earing….” Goat Joshua answered

The two then suddenly jumped to their feet feeling a piercing pain in their thigh, both heads spun around to see the snake head biting their thigh.

“Oh that get your attention? Good!! Ssstop ignoring me!!!” Snake Joshua hissed as she was steaming with anger.

“You bit our butt?!” Tiger Joshua asked shocked.

“Technically thigh but still!” Goat Joshua was just as shocked.

“You weren't lisssstening to me!! And since I don't have handsss or feet that had to do!” She moved closer to them “now that I have your damn attention, how about we make ssssure we're female before we all ssstart moping around? I would but once more I cannot stressss thiss enough….I...have...no...limbsss!” her tongue flicked out surprising her.

“Ok threes got a point” Tiger Joshua looked to the goat head.

“Oh so we're going by numbers now? And I'm guessing your one then?” Goat Joshua asked squinting angirly.

“Yeah actually I am!” Tiger Joshua butted her head against the goats.

Goat joshua butted hers back and they pressed against each other growling and gritting their teeth, the snake head huffed rolling her eyes before moving towards their back end sliding between their legs.

The bickering two these up as their eyes widened at sudden thing between their legs, both their right eyes twitched as they blushed.

Snake Joshua moved back out blushing “gotta admit….not my greatesst idea….king hard to angle mysself but uh…. we're girlss..” she looked at the two glaring blushing heads and chuckled nervous “oopsss…?”

“Never” Tiger Joshua growled still blushing.

“Do” Goat Joshua growled blushing.

“That Again!” They said at the same time.

Snake Joshua nodded scared “no problem…”

---

After an hour of sitting in silence after that experience Goat Joshua finally spoke up “ok we need out where the heck we are and how to get back home as well as back to normal, cause frankly sitting here in the forest ain't to much fun”.

“I agree with uh...Joshua…” Snake Joshua said.

“Yeah fine…” Tiger Joshua huffed lifting her side up.

Goat Joshua then lifted her side up and they began moving, now getting the hang of walking though triping and having to look down at their feet from time to time, snake Joshua mostly laid on the back of the two heads but from time to time would lift herself up and look around to see if she spotted any roads or exits to this forest “Hey hey I sssee a path!” She called down to the two.

“Really? Where??” Goat Joshua asked with excitement.

“Over there…” Snake Joshua smiled before looking down at the confused two and got confused herself before remembering a crucial thing that helped show where she was pointing “shit….no arms...ok” she huffed and then stretched her body to the north “behind those trees and bushes.

The three made their way there and found a path which brought excitement to all three of them since a path meant it had to lead to civilization, it as well wasn't as creepy as walking through the the forest.

“Haha! Thisss long...neck? Body? Whatever iss very ussseful! I can sstretch sssuper high up” Snake Joshua stretched up “and sssee sso mu-pah gah!” there was a web up in the branches and she had gone face first into it “get it off! Get it off!!” She yelled thrashing around.

The two laughed at the third heads struggle to get the webs off.

“We would, but your to high up” Goat Joshua chuckled

“Get lower genius” Tiger Joshua smirked and blew the webs off when she got lower.

“Oh how I missss my armss…” Snake Joshua whimpered laying on their back.

“Don't worry once this is fixed you'll have arms and legs” Goat Joshua said reassuringly.

“Well unless you got magic super powers that can turn people back from a female monster then we shit out of luck” Tiger Joshua huffed.

“Oh glad we're all so hopeful!” Goat Joshua said sarcastically before glaring at the tiger head who just rolled her eyes.

Following the path they came to a fork in the road, two large leading away from each other, the group looked between the paths.

“I say we got the right one” Goat Joshua said.

“I say left” Tiger Joshua said.

“Right is right, so we go that way” Goat Joshua glared.

“We're gonna follow a path based on that idea??” Tiger Joshua glared back.

“It's the best we got!” Goat Joshua yelled.

“We'll since I'm the one in charge we go left” Tiger Joshua declared.

“When did we decide that??” Goat Joshua yelled.

“Just now, I call dibs!” She smirked.

“You chat call dibs!” She yelled.

“Well I just did so dibs!” Tiger Joshua tried to move them down the left path but her other side wouldn't budge.

“No no I call a vote for which way we go!” Goat Joshua yelled.

“Fine!” Tiger Joshua growled.

The two heads then turned to the third, Snake Joshua looked between them “wait shit I'm the deciding vote….”

“Yeah you are and I think we go left” Tiger Joshua growled.

Goat Joshua rolled her eyes at the tiger head “I say right”.

“....I vote right” Snake Joshua said and gulped looking at the tiger head.

Tiger Joshua growled extremely mad “ughhh!!!”

They went down the right path while Goat Joshua smirked, snake Joshua kept herself on boat Joshua side of the body as Tiger Joshua looked very mad and kept growling.

The very tense walk continued into night and the forest had now become far more creepy, things seemed more active at night as they heard howls and roads echo through the air, snake Joshua looked around frantic unlike the two who had the ability to fight or run she had nothing to defend herself or run with, she was defenseless.

“Uh...c-can we maybe make a fire tonight?....o-or hide sssomewhere?” Snake Joshua asked scaredly.

“Oh is the wittle Shakey wakey scwade?” Tiger Joshua teased looking back at her.

“No sshit! I'm a sssnake!!!” She hissed.

“She's right, it's dangerous to wander around at night we could get lost or attacked by some animal” Goat Joshua said.

“Oh come on! What animals gonna wanna attack us? Were a three headed tiger, goat, and snake monster!” Tiger Joshua yelled.

At that moment they all heard a loud howl and rustling in a bush before a large wooden wolf brief from the bushes and blocked their path growling.

“Shit…..” all three cursed.

Comments

[Alicon Glactistar]

Surprising this was updated. Just going to hope for some more.

[Fancy Fox]

neat, an update! i really like the premise so far so thanks for the chapter!

[Princesolarecilpse]

I am wondering what happens next

[Princesolarecilpse]

I wonder if there is going to be more

[LH45]

This needs to get ahead in chapters. Pun intended