• Published 10th Sep 2018
  • 2,791 Views, 51 Comments

Fizzlepop's Number One Assistant - milesprower06



Settling into his new life in Ponyville, Grubber wonders how he can best help out with Fizzlepop's duties around the castle.

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101 Questions You Had About Assisting But Were Afraid To Ask

The haze of the slumbering realm was lifted from around Grubber as he slowly woke to a claw poking him.

"Come on Grubber, time to get up. Rise and shine." He heard Spike say.

"I can't believe you get up this early when you don't have an early morning raid scheduled." He grumbled, throwing the blanket aside as he got up out of the small bed that Fizzlepop had set up right next to her bed in her bedroom.

Spike scoffed.

"Heh, if you think this is early, then you're definitely going to have a hill to climb." The dragon replied.

Grubber glanced up at the clock on Fizzlepop's nightstand, and saw that it was 8:00 in the morning... And also saw that Fizzlepop was nowhere to be found, and her bed had been expertly made.

"Yeesh, I slept through her alarm clock and her making her bed? 'Hill to climb' is right." Grubber said as he walked over to the base of the nightstand and opened the bottom drawer, which Fizzlepop had cleared out for his use. He pulled out a clean shirt, similar to the one he had with the Storm Corps insignia, but now thanks to Rarity, he now had five with the six-pointed purple star, the insignia of Princess Twilight's Kingdom of Friendship. It was a belated and custom-made Hearth's Warming gift.

"No sweat; I still oversleep at times, and I've been assisting Princess Twilight for years. But you wanted a crash course in becoming an assistant, so let's get started." Spike replied, and together, the two of them left the bedroom and made their way down to the dining hall.

It had been roughly two weeks since he had come into Ponyville during the town's Hearth's Warming Celebration. Not too long after that, Equestria had rung in a new year. As a considerable portion of the town was made up of farmers, a lot of them were taking time off. The population annually dropped around this time of year when farmers took family vacations to warmer destinations like Las Pegasus or Appleloosa, which now had a budding tourism industry.

But for others in town, life went on as normal. One group in particular was Major Fizzlepop Berrytwist and her E.U.P. Royal Guards for the town. After a tearful reunion on Hearth's Warming Eve, Fizzlepop had done her best to make him feel at home, but she could only do so much before she had to return her attention to her station. It hadn't even been a week before Grubber started feeling restless; apparently, one could have too much spongecake before you began to go stir-crazy.

In his trips to and from the kitchen and attempting to get a better claw on the layout of the castle, he noticed Spike in his role of Princess Twilight Sparkle's assistant, and had asked him to show him the ropes, hoping that he could fall into a similar role with Fizzlepop, just like the old days. Spike had cleared his schedule for the day, and now here they were.

But how did one assist the Captain of the Guard? What were the key differences between the Storm Corps and the Ponyville E.U.P?

Getting up earlier was apparently the first step, and it was something he was going to have to work on.

"So how does she usually start her day?" Grubber asked as the two of them ate their spongecake breakfast, Spike's with a topping of gem dust.

"At 6:30 in the morning, or 'zero-six-thirty' in military time. They start with morning role call, then PT, or physical training, and the night watch is usually relieved after that." Spike answered.

"So what is she usually doing now?"

"Hm... Quarter after eight... I believe she'd be down in the barracks with the squad members not on watch for sparring practice."

The 'barracks' was comprised of almost half of the castle basement, re-purposed for E.U.P. use. Down here, her squad could maintain their armor pieces with a forge, catch forty winks if they didn't feel like walking home after a shift, and frequently drilled and sparred with each other in the training room. Training sessions had initially taken place in the library, but Fizzlepop had quickly felt that they deserved an area of their own.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, they were passed by two departing night watchponies, who gave curt nods as they ascended to the ground floor. They didn't get too much farther down the slowly curving hall before they heard sounds of fighting. Grubber followed Spike up to the door, and the dragon momentarily turned to him before opening the door.

"I'm sure they won't mind if we watch. Let's just stay against the wall and stay out of the way." He told the hedgehog, before quietly opening the door and the duo slipped inside.

Indeed, the outer edge of the circular room was ringed with a dozen E.U.P. guards who were standing at parade rest. Grubber spotted Tempest in the center of the room. He wasn't sure if she noticed them come in, because the attention of the resting guards were on the pair of pegasi in the center of the room; Captain Rainbow Dash and Commander Thunderlane, who were currently in the middle of a sparring match.

They, in addition to the rest of the guards present, were in full gear, and they seemed to have a... Shimmer about them.

"Did they dip themselves in hoof polish or something?" Grubber whispered to the dragon, just loud enough to be heard over the periodic clang of spears that they each held.

"Nope. Shielding spell, compliments of their Battlemage. It minimizes injuries while still letting them use full contact maneuvers." Spike replied, subtly nodding over to the heliotrope unicorn who stood next to Tempest, horn faintly glowing. Instead of platemail, she wore a cloak with the E.U.P. colors.

Grubber was certainly no stranger to sparring practice. He and Tempe- err, Fizzlepop, had participated in drilling the Storm Corps for months in preparation for the invasion of Equestria. It was the best way to keep soldiers at their best, and prepared at all times.

Both Thunderlane and Rainbow Dash were incredibly agile. Every swing of the spear was either dodged or countered by the other. Grubber gathered that the goal was to make contact with your opponent's body.

Rainbow tightly gripped her spear with her left hoof. Keeping her eyes on Thunderlane's spear, she faked a lunge to the right, then as she began to turn around, she tossed her spear up, and her right wing caught it as she completed the rapid 360-degree turn, and it was enough to catch Thunderlane off guard, who couldn't get his spear in place quickly enough, and the front end of Rainbow's spear slammed into his left side. His shield crackled, but Grubber was wondering how exactly it protected as the blow was enough to knock Thunderlane on his side, and quickly found the tip of Rainbow's spear inches from his muzzle.

'Eeesh, wouldn't want to be him right now...' Grubber thought to himself.

The room was quiet for only a second as Rainbow retracted her spear and smirked at Thunderlane before offering a hoof to him. As she helped him to his hooves, the room erupted in thundering hooves as the rest of the squad applauded the match. Thunderlane seemed no worse for wear as he accepted a hoof bump from the cyan pegasus. Grubber assumed that the shields protected from piercing injury, but allowed the full transfer of momentum from weapons. Incredibly effective, he surmised.

But what he didn't understand was the applause and encouragement. In the Storm Corps, the losers were subjected to lashes, or the most menial of tasks such as scrubbing the decks, and they were also last to get food. But here, Thunderlane and Rainbow shared friendly banter as they left the center circle, and two more squad members took their place.

Spike was right. Clearly, he had a lot to learn.

Author's Note:

Well, I'm going to go ahead and file this story into the 'I have no idea if this will go anywhere nor where it will go' drawer.

As always, perhaps suggestions and conversation with my awesome readers will stir my creative juices.

This chapter has been on the back burner of my brain for awhile, and I finally pushed myself to get it written.

But again, no idea what to do next.

Thanks for reading!