From Life to New Life

by Blue Breeze

Things get Strange

Author's Note: Damn you Fimfiction for making me write another chapter just to get this crap officially published. Anyway, I'm well aware that the whole dying to get into Equestria thing is very cliched, but it goes much deeper than that. I promise that this mess won't be completely cliched the whole way through.

Ever since I can remember I have wondered what it would actually be like when I really die. I guess I should consider myself kinda lucky that my death was so quick and painless. From the second the bullet left the gun and found a new home in my skull I felt I had an out of body experience and like I wasn't even on Earth anymore.

Most TV shows and movies tend to describe dying as feeling very weak and cold and seeing a long, dark tunnel that ends in a bright light. I always assumed what followed after that, depending on the person, would either be some golden gates in a sea of clouds filled with people in white robes and rings above their heads, or fiery mountains of ember with rivers of blood and little, red guys with horns and pitchforks.

But I never see a single bit of any of that. I see the dark tunnel, but it's much more like a dark void of nothingness. There is not a single speck of anything but darkness all around me, which is even worsened by the fact I can't feel any of my muscles.. It seems as if it's just a void to hold me for the rest of eternity to do nothing but sit there with my thoughts until I eventually go mad from them.

But just as I think I'm about to be trapped forever, I try to move my fingers and actually get a response. I start to fell the feelings in my other nerves returning as well. I start to feel around to find that I'm somehow lying in grass. I start to slowly open my eyes as a bit of light shines through them.

After rubbing my eyes from the sudden change in lighting, I look around to find I'm in some kind of forest. I look myself over to find I lost my money, but I still have all of my clothes and glasses. At least I've got the essentials for now.

I pick myself up off the ground in a hurry as I quickly look around my new environment, stunned by what I'm seeing. No sea of clouds or fiery mountains, just a normal looking forest area.

I put my hand up to my head. 'What the hell is all of this?' I think to myself. 'I know it was never clear where people go when they die, but this? Some kind of big forest.' My eyes shoot open as I get an idea. 'Hey, maybe I'm just dreaming. This could all just be one big, realistic nightmare.'

To test this out, I decide to do the one thing that people say is the one clear sign of dreaming: whether or not I can feel any pain. I walk over to a nearby tree and pull a fist back as I slam it into the tree in front of me. I instantly feel a burst of pain in my knuckles as I grab my hand and say a few muffled swears.

I start to calm down as I let my hand go once the pain starts to die down. I move my digits a bit, still a tad sore, but nothing I can't put up with.

'Okay, so this definitely is not a dream.' I think. 'But if it's not a dream, then just where the hell am I?' I look forward and shrug my shoulders before walking. 'Guess the only way I'm gonna find out is walking around until I find something.'

I simply walk, not really looking to go anywhere specific, just out of this forest and hopefully into some civilization. I always think a lot while just walking, and right now I've got hundreds of thoughts flying through my head. What is this place? Why am I here? If I died, then how did I get here? And will I be able to find something to eat? I'm getting pretty hungry.

What? Coming back from the dead and walking through a mysterious forest is hungry work. It's a legitimate thing to think about at a time like this.

I continue my walk until I see an opening poking through some trees in the distance. I start to pick up my pace a bit as I near and come out through the other side. I take a breath of air as I get out before noticing the town off in the distance.

My eyes go wide at the sight of it. It has a fairly colorful and almost story book look to it, as if it were something out of a child's fairy tale. The look of the world actually reminds me of... Ponyville?

I slap myself in the face. 'No! Stop thinking like that! Don't go getting ahead of yourself, man. Just stay calm and figure things out before jumping to any conclusions. You don't wanna start any kind of wars or set off any nuclear explosions.'

I look off to my right to see a musty looking shack that looks like it hasn't been cleaned in years. I also see a wheel barrel set next to a hill and an axe set next to a stump where it looks to be where the person living there chops wood.

I decide to check the place out and try to find someone who can tell me what's going on. As I approach, I start to notice just how small the house really is in comparison to me. Heh, maybe I'm in Oz and just landed outside of Munchkin Land.

I smirk at the thought before remembering what I'm doing and knock on the door. Ther's no response, so I try knocking again. I start getting a bit irritated as I continually knock without a response from inside.

"Alright! Alright!" a cranky voice shouts from inside. "Hold your horses! I'm comin'!"

"About damn time." I say under my breath. I hear the door unlock as the owner of the building opens the door and my eyes go as wide as baseballs. The creature before me does much of the same. The door was not answered by a person, but a donkey wearing an extravagant, blonde toupee.

Both of us stare at each other in disbelief before we both let out loud screams. I try to walk back, but stumble and fall before picking myself back up.

The donkey backs up in fear as well. "Ah! It's a monster!"

I put my hands up as I continue backing up. "No no! You don't understand! I'm no monster, I'm-" my speech is cut off as I back right into the wheel barrel and set it to roll down the hill. We watch as it speeds further and further down before smashing into a million pieces upon hitting a large rock at the bottom.

"My wheel barrel!" the donkey shouts.

I look at him with an apologetic look. "Guess that was poor parking on your part."

He is not amused as his face begins turning red and a bit of steam is coming out of his ears.

Suddenly, a female donkey comes out from the other room. "Cranky? Is something wrong, dear? I thought I head screaming, and I-" she stops as she sees me and looks at me in terror. "Good Celestia! What is that thing?!"

The donkey named Cranky turns around to her. "Matilda, stay back and go grab my shotgun. I've got a monster to take care of."

"Shotgun...?" I whisper. My first thought is "what", but my next one is "fucking run!". I already got shot once today. I'm not about to let it happen again.

I quickly turn atound in an attempt to escape, but I trip and fall down the hill, tumbling as I do so. I stop just a bit short of the rock and wheel barrel and I groan.

"Great move, genius." I say to myself. I bring a hand to my face and realize my glasses are gone. I look around frantically for them before spotting the crushed frames of them. I must have fallen on them when I fell down the hill.

I look back to the top of the hill and realize that saving myself is more important than the glasses. I pick myself back up before bolting in any general direction. I'm not the most athletic guy, but you'd be surprised what the human body is capable of doing when in a desperate situation. I don't care where I go, as long as I get away from that literally crazy jackass.

It doesn't matter if my life was threatened by a talking donkey, the only thing I can even think of doing is running right now. But once I believe I'm a good distance away from danger, I stop and take a seat underneath an apple tree. I breath heavily as the effects of all of that running start to catch up with my body. My heart is beating a mile a minute, my lungs feel like they're gonna explode, and my legs are very tired.

After a moment to catch my breath, I start putting my mind to work at what I just saw. 'Okay, that was a talking donkey with a toupee. The other donkey called him Cranky... just like Cranky Doodle Donkey from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.'

I slump my arms and look out at nothing in particular. It doesn't make any kind of sense, but there's no other explanation for what I just saw other than that I'm in Equestria. I had always wanted to go there, of course, I'd have to be crazy not to. But I had always reminded myself that it wasn't real and not to dwell over that. I was firmly grounded in my reality and believed that there was no real Equestria. But there's no other explanation for it.

My stomach interrupts my train of thought as it grumbles. Remembering I am in fact under an apple tree, I get up and pluck one off of a branch. I know this may technically be stealing, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Besides, one apple isn't going to break anyone.

I begin thinking once again as I eat the apple. 'I'm in Equestria.... I guess my dream really has come true. But what do I do now? I never expected to get this far. If fanfiction has taught me anything, human humans that come here always have much rougher times than those who are changed when coming in. I need to think up a plan to get into contact with civilization without freaking anyone out and causing a panic. But how? Being that I was near Cranky's house, that obviously means I'm near Ponyville. That's at least a good start. Guess I'll go the obvious route and try to find the mane six. I know it won't be that easy, but it's better than nothing.'

Over the ways a bit, an orange farm mare and a large, red stallion work together and harvesting the fruit from the trees.

"Hoowee. This harvestin' sure is goin' well. Right, Big Mac?" Applejack asks her older brother.

"Eeyup." he replies characteristically.

Just then, Applejack stops her working as she hears a noise. She puts her ear out to get a better listen. "Ya'll hear that, Big Mac?"

"Eeyup." he says. "Sounds sorta like some critter's eatin somethin'."

Applejack's eyes narrow. "Some thievin' varmint's tryin' to steal a bite o' our apples." she turns to the noise and motions for Big Macintosh to follow. "Come on, Big Mac."

The two farmer ponies carefully trot to the source of the noise. They peer behind a tree and go slack-jawed at what they see.

They get back behind the tree and exchange nervous look. "What the hay is that thing?"

"Ah have no idea, sis. Ah've never seen anythin' like it before."

"Looks like kind o' hairless monkey, but it's wearin' a bunch o' strange clothes."

"Well, we can't just let it take our apples. We're gonna need to catch it."

"Right. Ah'll get mah rope."

While those two are doing that, I finish off my apple and toss the core away as I continue my thinkng. 'I wonder why I of all people was brought here, and how for that matter. Kind of feels like I'm in a cliche fanfic if I just die and wake up in Equestria. There's gotta be more to it than that. I also gotta remember to play it cool. Don't try to come on as threatening or try to hurt anypony. And for the love of God, don't start acting like a fanboy and let them know about you being a brony. That could be REALLY bad if they find that out. You need to play it natural here.'

My thoughts are interrupted yet again as a rope ties itself around my ankles and starts pulling on me. "What the hell?! Woah!"

I get dragged a bit as Applejack pulls me in with her teeth. "Ah don't know what ya'll are, but ain't no varmint stealin' mah apples!"

My eyes widen and a smile grows on my face as I see who my attacker is. "No way. You're..." I stop myself as I realize what's going on. I may not wanna hurt anypony, but the least I can do is try to explain myself. Or else this may get even worse.

I grab the rope with both hands and tug back. The sudden force makes Applejack fall forward and release the rope. I grab the knot around my feet and get it off as I quickly get to my feet.

Applejack gets back up and glarees at me. "Oh, you wanna fight, do ya?"

"No, you don't understand, I'm-" my sentence is cut off as I feel an extremely hard kick get me right in the back. The sudden of pain is so much that fall over and collapse.

The shock is so much I can feel myself slipping out of consciousness and back into the darkness.

Applejack smiles at her brother for doing a job well done. "Nice goin', Big Mac."

"Eeyup." he replies.

"Now you grab that thing and take it to the barn. Ah'll get the rest o' the girls down here so we can find out just what the hay this thing is."

Big Mac picks up my limp body and puts me on his back as he takes me to the barn as Applejack hurries off to grab her friends and bring them back.

I knew this wasn't going to be easy.

Comments

[Zephyr]

Oh, the classical meeting with Applejack, with the more classical defensive/agressive reactions of her.
Well, even if it's written right in the story, it is cliché, sorry Blue :S

But above that... it was a good chapter, even though it had a sour taste in my mouth after reading the last part of it.

[Blue Breeze]

1006292 everything in this story is a cliche!

[Zephyr]

1006311
It's not that bad, this type of story is just overused, but if you have a unique idea, then it'll be good!

[Quad Ruple]

'As you walk through the forest, you come across a bad drawing of a faceless man wearing a suit.'

[Blue Breeze]

1007227 oh hell no

[Rhino]

Cliche or not the very nature of these kinds of stories makes it to where if you truly want to gauge their quality you wait till we get past introductions. After all not everyone goes out of their way to make it unique, would be way too much work. I prefer to think of this as classic, still looking forward to next one Blue!

[Ice]

"Hell, Hell, Heaven, Hell.....says here your not suppose to be dead for another month....Mr..*Adjust glasses* Thissen......well I guess the rational course of action would be to send you back and make it look like you barely survived but.....RANDOM DIMENSION!"

[Jeff Belinger]

1010202
ikr

[Blue Breeze]

1010101 if theres a next one. im unsure if i actually want to continue or not.

[Atomic Vortex]

AJ's just way too good for you Blue! XD

More proof she's best pony!

[Blue Breeze]

1011166 big mac's the one who got me from behind

[superfunnelc]

10 bucks says that Flutters goes ballistic on Mac and applejack

[MLPDavester]

1011250 How'd that feel? Sounds like it might have stung a bit.

[Gutter_Cat]

Oh boy how are you goin' to get out of this pickle?

[Blue Breeze]

1014604 by sticking it in a barrel with some kumquats while i eat some chimicherrychongas

i.chzbgr.com/completestore/2012/1/23/78fbc293-bd58-4c0c-a066-0ec3686f66d4.jpg

[Gutter_Cat]

1014638 Novel ideal sir Bluebert!

[Blue Breeze]

1015249 lazy with descriptions? i just prefer to give whats a full accurate look. cant get dead on accuracy without an image

[Cobra 1]

HAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAH You almost got killed by an Ass and then got your ass kicked by a pony... hold on I got to answer the door... Big Mac you can't be owww son of a bitch.