• Published 14th Jul 2018
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Applejack's Butt - Vedues



The new stallion in town is strangely obsessed with rear ends. Especially Applejack's.

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Chapter 3: Putting it Behind Them

Applejack walked into Sugarcube Corner the next afternoon tired, sweaty, and covered in dirt. Dash stood at her side, looking just as bad.

“Ugh,” Dash said, stretching her wings out with a wince, “I didn’t think planting trees would be such a pain.”

“Nopony ever said running a farm was easy.” Applejack took off her hat and fanned herself with it. “Still, you did a real good job last night and this morning. Order whatever you want, my treat.”

“Thanks, AJ.” Dash approached the counter. “Pinkie, one Rainbow Dash Special.”

Pinkie covered her nose. “Ew, would you like a bath with that?”

“Har har.” Dash stepped out of the way and motioned for Applejack to step up.

Applejack smirked. “One eclair, and no bath for me neither.”

“Coming right up.” Pinkie grabbed an eclair from the display case and gave it to Applejack. “Dash, your food will be ready in a jiffy, however long that is. I think it’s less than a minute.”

“Sounds good, Pinkie.” Dash looked around the room. “Where do you want to sit?”

“Dunno.” Applejack noticed a familiar stallion in the same booth as the day before. Surprisingly, Sketchy looked even worse than her and Dash. One of his eyes was swollen nearly shut, bruises covered him, and his mane and tail both looked like they’d been electrocuted. A stack of papers covered the table in front of him. “What in the hay happened to him?”

“What happened to who?” Dash asked. She followed her friend’s gaze. “Wait, isn’t that the guy who was staring at your butt yesterday?” She whistled. “Looks like you beat him up bad for it.”

“I didn’t beat him up. I dunno how he got looking like that.” Applejack fished some coins out of her bag and paid Pinkie. “C’mon, let’s see what happened.” She walked over to Sketchy, who was leaning over the stack of papers, drawing. “Mind if we sit here?”

He looked up at her. His eyes were still doing that weird thing where they seemed to be looking everywhere except into her own eyes. “Wait, do I own this booth for some reason? If so, how much should I charge ponies to sit at it?”

Applejack chuckled and sat down. “No, Sketchy, you don’t own the booth. It’s just polite to ask permission before you sit next to somepony.”

“Oh, okay.” He reached for his saddlebags and then paused. “Should I pay you for telling me that?”

“Nope.” She looked at one of his sketches. It was a near-perfect recreation of Pinkie standing behind the counter with a smile on her face. Huh, looked like he wasn’t kidding when he said he was a professional artist. “By the way, this is my friend, Rainbow Dash.”

Dash sat down next to her. “Yeah, you’ve probably heard of me, but let’s not make a big deal of it.”

Sketchy frowned slightly. “Should I have heard of you?”

Applejack put a hoof over Dash’s mouth before she could say anything. “She’s part of a group called the Wonderbolts. They’re the best stunt fliers in Equestria, and most ponies will know at least the basics of who they are and what they do.” She turned to Dash. “He spent his whole life in Griffonstone, so he don’t know much about Equestria yet.”

Dash deflated a little. “Oh, well then, I’ll have to get you some tickets to our next show, so you can see what you’ve been missing.”

Sketchy gave her another one of those slight frowns. “How much do they cost?”

“Dude, don’t even worry about it.” Dash grinned. “Everypony should get to see the Wonderbolts perform at least once.” Her expression turned more serious. “Hey, why were you staring at Applejack’s rear the other day?”

Sketchy turned to Applejack. “Should I charge her to answer?”

She facehoofed. “No, Sketchy. Ponies generally ask and answer questions free of charge.”

“Okay.” He returned his gaze to Dash. “I sell pictures of models or do commissions to earn bits. Yesterday, I noticed many stallions staring at Applejack, especially her posterior, and so wanted to observe both it and her.” He reached into the stack of papers and pulled one out. “What is your opinion, did I represent it well?”

The picture, unsurprisingly, showed Applejack’s butt. Specifically, it was a picture of her standing at the counter with Dash yesterday. This sketch was the same high quality as the last one, but … Sheesh, did her butt really poke out that far?

Dash leaned over to look at the picture as well. “Okay, that does look pretty good.”

“Thank you,” Sketchy said, “but I still need a model; my savings won’t last forever.”

“And you want it to be AJ,” Dash said.

“Preferably,” Sketchy said.

Applejack just sighed and passed the picture back to him.

Pinkie appeared next to their table with a big bowl of fruit arranged to form a rainbow. “Here you go, one Rainbow Dash Special.”

“Thanks, Pinkie.” Dash took it and turned back to Sketchy. “Anyway, what happened to you? You look like you picked a fight with a rabid, electric sheep.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Electric sheep?”

“Shut up, it sounded cooler in my head.” She turned back to Sketchy. “So?”

Sketchy sank down in his chair and blushed a little. “I’m not entirely certain what happened.” He shifted his gaze to Applejack. “I went to that friend you mentioned, I think her name was Rarity? Regardless, I asked if I could look at her butt in return for a lot of money. The next thing I know, I woke up in a trash can outside of her business.”

Dash busted up. “Wait, you seriously asked Rarity something like that?” She fell over in her seat, laughing hysterically.

Sketchy’s face got even redder. “That’s what Applejack told me to do, so I did it.”

Applejack facehoofed. “I didn’t mean for you to do it that way.”

“I … I don’t understand.” Sketchy sighed. “I wish I could be back home.”

Right, Applejack reminded herself, he wasn’t from around here. She sighed. “Look, Sketchy, there’s a world of difference between asking somepony to model for you and asking to look at their butt.”

He looked down. “Would you mind explaining the difference, please?”

And just like that, Applejack’s mind went blank. This stallion had a talent for taking the most obvious things and making them so confusing that she couldn’t understand them herself. “I guess they mean the same thing in the most basic sense, but the difference is …” She paused. “I dunno, the difference is in the presentation or something, I guess.” She looked to Dash for help.

Her friend shrugged. “Asking somepony to be a model just sounds nicer than asking to stare at their butt, but if you need someone awesome to pose for you, I’m up for it.”

Sketchy shook his head. “I don’t think you’d work very well as a model. The same stallions that were talking about how attractive Applejack’s butt is were calling you ‘flat flank,’ which sounds like an insult.”

Dash’s cheeks colored. “H-hey, I’ll have you know that my butt is just as good as anypony’s. Here, watch.” She got up and walked to the center of the dining area. “Listen up, everypony! Raise your hooves if you think Applejack has a great butt!”

Confused looks and murmurs filled the room, but one by one, hooves began to rise. Soon nearly everypony had a hoof in the air.

“Okay, now put them down and raise them again if you think I have a great butt!”

Most hooves stayed down, and their owners found something interesting to look at elsewhere.

“What?” Dash pointed at her flank. “Don’t you ponies realize how much work it takes to maintain a flank this toned? You could bounce a bit off of it.”

A stallion cleared his throat. “That’s kind of the problem. It’s too toned. There’s no curve at all.”

Dash sat down hard, jaw hanging open. “But, but …”

“Hey, this looks fun!” Pinkie bounced up next to Dash. “What does everypony think of my cute rump?” She gave it a shake. “Get your hooves up there!”

A lot more hooves went up, though not as many as with Applejack.

“Ah,” Pinkie said, “the Pink Posterior only gets second place. Oh well, that’s still pretty good.” She bounced back to the counter.

Dash, meanwhile, looked about ready to faint. “But, I always thought I had a good butt …”

Sketchy turned to Applejack. “That does illustrate why you’d be the perfect model for me. Would you be willing to do it?”

“Eh, that’s flattering and all,” Applejack said, not meeting his gaze, “but I’d really rather not have pictures of my rear getting passed around town.”

Sketchy looked disappointed, but he nodded. “Do you know where I could find a model willing to do such modeling?”

Nowhere in town, hopefully. In fact, Applejack could only think of one way a local stallion could see mares in sexy poses …

She let out a long groan and stood up. “I know I’m gonna regret this, but stay here a minute. I’ll be right back with something that may help.”