• Member Since 7th Dec, 2016
  • offline last seen Dec 16th, 2023

AliceLiz


Aspiring writer and insatiable SciSet shipper. She/her. https://twitter.com/CraftableAlice

T

Twilight is having a sleepover with her best friend (and crush) Sunset Shimmer, and they have the house all to themselves. Unbeknownst to Twilight, Sunset has some plans for the evening.


Contains: Pet play, no actual sex, consensual mostly-innocent fun.

Cover vectors:
Sci-Twi by Uponia
Sunset Shimmer by CaliAxian

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 33 )

This was so amazing! You should continue to write stories!

I'm a simple guy... I see SciSet romance, I give Instant Fav...

This was actually pretty damn good.

I liked it, it was nice to see a premise like this not just turned into hardcore porn.

That was kinda super adorable.

adorable. if this is your first story then keep it up!
nothing terrible about it

Comment posted by cuentadea_a deleted Jul 22nd, 2018

This started off kinda cute, then it got weird, then it went back to cute again.

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Well, I hope you enjoyed it regardless :twilightsmile:

Well I for one enjoyed this, whenever I feel bord I definitely know I’m coming back to read this again. Well done.

Very cute! I'd definitely be into seeing more from you in the future.

Absolutely adorable.

Well done, I love to see nonsexual pet-play stories. Also loved how there were pauses for each activity, giving Twilight the option to stop being Sparkles each time, all winding down with the after-care.

Hope to see more from you!

Don't you just hate when you go over to a friend's house and you accidentally end up in petplay?

In all seriousness.

This was a very cute fic, and pretty good firstfic at that.

Keep up the good work.

I thought this story was very well written and a pretty unique slice-of-life plot. I was hesitant at first on how this could've poorly led, but in my opinion you incorporated the pet playing organically, staying true to the characters while also giving a little devious side to sunset (playful, but never to the side where it was ooc of her). I could see this happening in the actual show as there aren't any major barriers that would make it difficult to form in a non-au fanfic, but I think I see your reasoning on doing so as you could include the "family" relationship that Sunset had with her previous mentor. It was a great choice!

The only nitpick I have is early on in the story from a writing perspective. I found that you used a variety of synonyms wonderfully as any author should do, but at the start of the story you used the same word, "demurely", relatively close to both instances of when it was used. It was a little distracting only due to the word not being used often, so I may have noticed more than I should've due to that reason.

I'd disregard that nitpick. Great TwiSun fanfic!!! And congrats at writing your excellent first story!

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Thanks for pointing out that I used 'demure' twice in quick succession. I try to be more careful with that stuff, but I guess I missed that one. :twilightsheepish:

I'm glad you enjoyed my story!

This is a very enjoyable read. Also, given the way in which you wrote it, I think you could get away with an E rating.

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It might get away with an E rating, true. But I made it T so I could include the Fetish tag since i consider pet play to be a fetish, even if it's very tastefully done here.

I'm glad you enjoyed the story. :twilightsmile:

I've been coming on this site almost daily since I fell in love with FiM's characters, and every day I look for a story worth my time to read.
This was time well spent. :twilightsmile:
Your writing is crisp and clear, and well defined in both style and flow. It's detailed, but not to the point where it beats the reader over the head or gets boring–a balance, I'm loathe to admit, I myself struggle with finding a lot of the time. And it builds a simple idea–innocently-intended play between two high school friends–into a story readers can enjoy. For this, my friend, you get an instant Upvote, a place in my Favorites, and a Follow so I can see what you do next.
Please, for the love of Heaven, God, and all that makes FiM one of the greatest, most wholesome children's shows a grown adult could get hooked watching for a smile or a laugh–and for the love of literature–don't ever stop writing. We need writing like this in the world. It honestly made my night to read this. :scootangel:

"The noblest art is that of making others happy." - P. T. Barnum

P.S. - I think Mr. Barnum would salute you–he, too, had a respect for the written word. :yay:

A wonderful start to your writing on here.

The dynamic was good, the initial reluctance and eventual acceptance were both believable, as well as her enjoyment. The acts of adding multiple rewards together to support behavior was well executed, and at the end of the day I could never say no to some cute, consensual, BDSM play.

Definitely going to follow you, and definitely going to share this with some friends to look at. :twilightsmile:

P.S.

I left out the best bit: after-play snuggle at the end. Aftercare is important, and these two seem to take to it naturally.

Not just good, but damn good. Particularly for your first time. I look forward to any possible sequels and what you write in the future. You've earned upvote, favorite, and follow.

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Thank you so much for your kind words. I am in literal tears reading this, I never thought someone would feel so strongly about this, or any story I might write. :heart:

My story may have made your night, but your comment has made my week. :twilightsmile:

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I'm so happy you liked my story! The two of you were pretty big inspirations for this story. :twilightblush:

Aftercare is important, and these two seem to take to it naturally.

The aftercare came really naturally to me to be honest. The story would have felt incomplete without it. Also, aftercare is something I wish was included in more stories. :twilightsmile:

9078185
D'awww, now I feel all fuzzy inside. But seriously, Damaged was a big inspiration for me when I first started, so it really warms my heart to see that we have been something of an inspiration for you. Keep going as you are and you can't go far wrong.:twilightsmile:

This was a good first story and you should write a second story.

Cute, but I'm a bit sad Twilight didn't have to strip. After all, pets don't wear clothes.

That was nice! I like how you managed to keep from going full on into smut territory. That’s no small feat. Though with this tantalizing taste, I kinda want to see a fic where SciTwi gets comfortable enough to go all the way.

Charming little story, have a like and a fav. (And a comment too I guess.)

I love it and it was funny:rainbowlaugh:

That was really sweet

This is cute. Its one of the few pet play fics that doesnt just gloss over how awkward it can be. Really well done.

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