• Member Since 24th Jun, 2018
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

cheerful9


E

Synopsis-When Twilight and her friends are given a task to find a missing draconequus, they enlist Discord to help them. As they search for clues that might lead them to the missing draconequus, Fluttershy starts to develop some feelings for Discord. Will it be enough to help them solve this case?


I worked on this story in 2016 when season 6 came out. There are some changes that are different from the show. For example, instead of Flurry Heart being the daughter of Shining Armor and Cadance, it's an alicorn oc I made named Pure Heart. The new form of the changelings doesn't appear until the next generation in my universe stories I plan on working on and there are more draconequuses besides Discord that live in a dimension called the Chaos Realm.

I began to work on it after seeing the new Disney movie 'Zootopia'. This story contains references from mostly Zootopia, other movies, and shows. Most of the ocs in my story are references to the characters that are from movies and shows. My brother and I worked on this story together and completed it by the end of 2016.

Chapters (15)
Comments ( 66 )

My brother and I worked on this story together and completed it by the end of 2016.

Then why'd this story come out in 2018?

9013769
I posted my story on fanfiction in 2016 and I didn't have an account on Fimfiction. My brother suggested that if I posted this story on Fimfiction, many people would read it. I thought about it for awhile until I finally decided to have an account on Fimfiction and post my story. Hope this makes enough sense.

She held out her tongue and said, “Bleah. Blood, blood, blood! And... death.” She pretended that blood was squirting out of her stomach and then laughed at the CMC. “Ha ha, ha!You should have seen the look on your faces!”

Zootopia reference

9014905
I know. I put that reference in the author's note.

“As I was saying, draconequuses were pretty monstrous back then. However, as time passed, they evolved beyond their primitive instincts and began to use their magic. Now they are the creatures we know today.”

I feel like “draconequi” would be more grammatically correct

9015546
Well people on fanfiction are okay with it.

The zootopia references are off the CHARTS

9015628
I know. I loved that movie so much I watched it 5 TIMES!!!!!

Sounds of laughter got Fluttershy's attention and she turned her head. Across from her, the pegasus saw Big Mac and Cheerilee. The two ponies were sitting together on a bench, watching the sunset.

In my mind I’m just gonna think “sugar bell “ instead of “cheerilee” if you don’t mind

9016935
That's okay. I thought of the shippings between Big Mac and Cheerilee and Party Favor with Sugar Belle in my fanfictions and other stories before season 7 came out in 2017. I'm okay with Big Mac and Sugar Belle shipping on the show.

9021930
I'm glad you do! :heart:
What do you like about it?

9021973
I hope you'll comment on what parts of the story you like.

First chapter, and already I am struck with Nostalgia. THE THEIF AND THE COBBLER?! I honestly never expected to see that in an MLP fanfic. So far, the story is interesting, it may take me a bit to get used to fluttercord since this is the first time I’m reading a fanfic of this ship, but I watched the bride of discord, so it shouldn’t be that different. I’m not so on board with the ship personally, but I won’t let that get in the way of me reading this story. I will not allow that to make me biased,

If there was one nitpick, it would be that why did Spike suspect someone’s would steal the emerald? And why Spike specifically? It doesn’t make sense why Spike so out of the blue would assume someone would steal an emerald he knew next to nothing about. Kind of feels out of nowhere. And why only Spike would be concerned? Why not a royal guard, or perhaps so you can keep Spike, make it that he somehow noticed something off about it (maybe some unknown dragon sense or something) and then that would give his suspicions more weight.

If a character is going to do or feel something, there should always be a reason. I hope this didn’t come off as mean, just some constructive advice to make the story points connect.

Of course, it’s on,y the first chapter, so who knows what can happen. 😄

9025620
I'm glad you're enjoying it. I'm also glad that you won't be biased on my ship of Fluttercord as you read my story.

To answer your question about why Spike was worried about the emerald, my brother and I want to add elements from the Thief and the Cobbler movie because we loved watching that movie when we were little and what better way to add something that would cause Spike to worry.

Can't wait to see what other comments you'll post for my story.

9026910
I can understand that, but in context, it would make sense for him to have a reason rather than it being because it's a reference. Even references should have a purpose in a story.

I'll be sure to leave my thoughts in later chapters.

Will you ponies please look out the window?!

Also I always think Spike gets his worrywart side from Twilight.

Missing draconequus that’s kinda a weird thing more importantly what do they look like?

Love the introduction of Discord’s sister, Antic.😊

9059860
I know. My brother and I thought it would be funny.

Dang, things just got real. This chapter was more of a setup, no not much happening aside from a few antics. I hope Antic will show up more.

Spike twiddles his claws in concern as he said, “I don’t know why, but I have the strangest feeling that somepony will try to steal the emerald.”

...later:
"Phew. I'm glad nobody stole it. I've saving this lil' nugget for a while. Come to poppa!" (Crunches on tasty emerald)

I have a plan that’s so cunning, you could tape it to a gopher and call it a squirrel.

PENALTY! It's: "Clever like a fox..."
...although I have known a few clever squirrels in my day. That and the 3000 ants that were accused as dressing up as grains of rice and held up a Chinese Food restaurant...
...
I don't think they did it. I know some of them, and they wouldn't do anything like that.

Truth be told the only reason I follow and read your story first place because it has fluttercord in it don't get me wrong I love the story but fluttercord was the main reason

9451507
Thanks! I understand. Hope to see what other comments you'll post.

Discord turned away from his conscience for a moment before he turned his head to ask it something, but his conscience had disappeared.

What was the video below meant to be?

10176828
It was suppose to be the song "Am I Feeling Love" from The Thief and The Cobbler. I'll fix it.

I think that this was an interesting chapter. I like the thief a lot, though I felt sort of sorry that he got beaten up by Granny Smith... Sort of.

10667504
Thanks! Wait til you see more of the Thief in the story.

I think I saw a Big Hero 6 reference in here, too. :rainbowlaugh:

(P.S: this story is so underrated, like it’s so well done. :fluttershbad:)

I don’t get the joke that pinkie pie just did.

10855502
The one with the four headed dog being gifted.

10855618
I'm sorry that you didn't understand it. It was a reference from the joke from the movie 'The Lion King 1 1/2.

Who do you think Antic‘s Voice actor should be?

As the ponies and Spike walked to the train station, they passed a male, light brown earth pony. He wore a brown tweed suit, a white shirt, and a red tie. He had brown eyes, short and neatly combed black hair, a long black tail, a small mole on his upper cheek, and a 5 o’clock shadow beard. For his cutie mark, it was a brown teddy bear.

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10974954
It's Kaley Cuoco. She played as Penny in Big Bang Theory.

Nearby, three small unicorn mares had just walked out of a department store, carrying bags with stuff they had just bought and were chatting. One of the unicorns had a white coat and her mane was black and was styled in a fashionable way. Her eyes were a cerulean blue color and her cutie mark was a purple shoe that looked fashionable as well. “Sweet Celestia, did you see those diamond-styled shoes?” the unicorn said to her friends in glee while using her magic to carry her bags.

When you mean small ponies, do you mean like midgets?

“But, Princess Celestia-!” Twilight began to speak before Officer Gruff interrupted her. “Do you think the princesses asked what I wanted when they assigned you to help me?” He said angrily.

Even so, I don’t think it would be wise to disobey the princess, And seeing how Applejack is the element of honesty, I doubt she would lie about them having other things to attend to. Besides, unlike chief Bogo, Gruff is only second in command as number 2 said in chapter 3. So it’s not really his call to make. Speaking of Bogo, I never did like that guy. Always being disrespectful to Judy Hopps just because she’s a smaller creature and thinking he could get away with it because he’s in charge. That’s what I call abusing power. Makes me think that he should be the villain and not bellwether. After all his voice actor was the same one who played Shere Kahn In jungle book 2016.

10978872
I know. My brother and I worked on this story together.

“Yeah,” Pinkie Pie said as she hopped in front of Fluttershy. “It’ll be fun!” Pinkie Pie smiled. “You’ll be up there with us, basking in front of the cameras! One of the centers of attention! A shining celebrity!”

Fluttershy nervously wrinkled her muzzle in fear as Pinkie Pie continued. “Everypony will be taking pictures of you, staring at you, and asking you questions that you can't answer quickly enough!” At that part, Fluttershy stepped back in shock.

Pinkie Pie continued talking happily, unaware that she was making her friend uncomfortable. “Not to mention that they’ll be seething jealous of you, thinking that they could be way better than you! ‘Why wasn't it them?’ ‘Why wasn't it them?!’ ‘Why couldn't they get chosen by the princess to solve a dangerous mystery?’ ‘Why didn't they get the chance to be chased by a savage jaguar draconequus and live to tell the tale?!’”

Tears began to form in Fluttershy's eyes as she trembled in fear as Pinkie continued. The pink earth pony was on a roll. “And then,” she said. “When you fail to answer a question and you choke, they’ll turn on you, becoming aseething, angry mob!

Fluttershy was on the verge of crying her eyes out as Pinkie said, “They’ll drive you out of Canterlot, and you’ll be so horribly, humiliated that you’ll lock yourself up in your cottage, NEVER ABLE TO SHOW YOUR FACE IN PONYVILLE AGAAAAAINN!!!” Pinkie Pie finished the sentence as if she was a deranged lunatic.

Honestly pinkie pie, when are you ever going to learn to keep your big mouth shut.

10986865
I know. She never learns. Wait till you see what happens to her when ponies try asking her questuions.

10986991
I know. Instead of Fluttershy getting nervous about answering questions, Pinkie Pie was the one getting nervous instead that she was caught in a loop.

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