There's Always Room for Jello
Getting called into the principal’s office is always an ominous thing, especially when it’s Vice Principal Luna doing the talking. It was no secret that she and her sister liked to unleash the classic good-cop bad-cop act, and Luna was the mean one. Well, not exactly mean, but you pretty much never got called into her office unless you were in trouble. With Celestia, it was even odds whether you were going to get a maternal lecture or a pat on the back for doing a good job. Luna was the one who handed out detention and other lovely things.
The one bit of nominally good news was that I had a pretty good idea why I’d gotten called in, and I wasn’t the one who was in trouble. Though that didn’t make me feel much better.
Sure enough, when I got to Luna’s office the first I spotted was Rainbow Dash sitting opposite her desk. She was shuffling in her seat, making a conscious effort to avoid eye contact with the vice principal as her feet tapped impatiently. I couldn’t blame her for not being able to meet the suspicious, disapproving glower Luna was hitting her with. Luna and Mom must’ve swapped notes at some point, because they both had the ‘I know you’re guilty, so don’t try to pretend you’re not’ glare down pat.
I knocked on the door, and the VP broke her staredown with Rainbow to open the door for me. “Miss Kicker. Thank you for joining us so promptly.”
I cleared my throat and did my best to look like a model student who had no idea why I was there. “Vice-Principal Luna. What’s going on?”
“It’s a total misunderstanding,” Rainbow blurted.
That at least distracted the VP from me for a bit as she shot Rainbow an arch glare. “I’m not sure how our entire swimming pool being turned into jello could be the result of a misunderstanding, Miss Dash.”
Oh for the love of—I told her not to do that! Sure, turning the entire swimming pool into jello was awesome and hilarious, and there’d be plenty of time for cleanup before the swim team needed it again, but it was just too big. Something that huge and public would have to draw a response from the powers that be.
Rainbow bit her lip, plainly struggling to contain her laughter. “Well, leaving aside the fact that even Principal Celestia thought it was really funny...” She caught herself a second later. “I mean, I wasn’t there when it happened or anything, but I heard about it. I heard people are already taking pictures and putting them all over the internet. Whoever pulled that prank is gonna be famous as an awesome prankster.”
I groaned inwardly. She was barely even making a token effort to pretend she was innocent. That had always been Rainbow’s biggest weakness when it came to pranking: she wanted the credit for it. She knew this prank would go down in CHS history, and she wanted her name attached to the legend. While I could completely understood that, wanting everyone to know it was her made it rather hard to avoid getting caught and slapped with a ton of detention.
I decided to feign ignorance a bit longer. “Okay ... so why am I here?”
Rainbow jumped in before Luna could say anything. “Because you were totally with me in study hall when it happened, remember?”
Luna regarded her with a skeptical frown, then shifted her attention to me. Her arms crossed over her chest as I got the full force of Luna’s dubious glare.
“Uh...” My first instinct was to back Rainbow up. She was my girlfriend and I should have her back, even if that meant being less than entirely honest with a principal. However ... well, lying to Luna was kind of a big deal. And she’d probably know if I did, even if she couldn’t prove it. There was no way Rainbow was the first student who’d ever thought of calling in their girlfriend to provide an alibi.
And really, Rainbow had picked study hall as her alibi? Sure, if it was Twilight nobody would have blinked at the excuse, but Rainbow?! The closest she got to doing any sort of voluntary studying was when she did it to avoid lectures from Twilight or badgering from me, not to mention there would be other kids there and there was no way Luna would just take my word for it. I was pretty much the epitome of an unreliable witness. If I backed Dash up, I’d just end up in detention with her.
But maybe I could tweak things around. There was no way Luna would buy the study hall story, but perhaps if I changed it to—
“Cloud!” Rainbow hissed desperately.
Luna stared down at me for a second longer, then nodded to herself. That’s when I figured out what I’d done wrong: I’d been thinking too much about it. Innocent people usually don’t need to take a minute to hammer out their alibi and make sure there’s no obvious ways to poke holes in it. I’d already given away that Rainbow was lying just by thinking about my answer.
“I thought as much. Thank you for your honesty, Miss Kicker.” She rounded on my girlfriend, unleashing a disapproving glare that would’ve made Mom proud. “That will be three weeks of detention. Two for making a mess of the pool, and one more for lying to me.”
Rainbow sputtered indignantly. “But that’s not—Cloud! Back me up here!”
Luna held up a hand in Rainbow’s direction. “One more outburst like that, Miss Dash, and you might be adding more to your sentence.” She shifted her attention to me, fixing me with a piercing stare. “Was there anything you wished to add, Miss Kicker?”
“That’s not ... she was...” I trailed off under the pressure of Luna’s glare, my half-formed story falling apart in my mind. “Never mind.”
Rainbow glared at me like I’d just planted a dagger in her back, but she kept her mouth shut. Luna looked back and forth between the two of us, a faint frown creasing her lips. “Ah. Well, I think you can both go now. I am going to be quite busy making arrangements for the pool. Your detention begins on Monday, Miss Dash. I expect I’ll have come up with something for you by that time.” She opened the door for both of us.
Rainbow went through the door first, bumping into me on the way out. I started to follow her, but Luna put a hand on my shoulder to hold me back for a moment. “You did the right thing, Miss Kicker.” Rainbow must’ve overheard that, because after Luna said that she picked up the pace and somehow managed to look even more pissed than she’d been before.
I was tempted to say something that would burn away whatever good will I’d earned by not going along with Rainbow’s lie, but I resisted the urge. Not like yelling at Luna now would make Rainbow less mad at me.
I trudged out of the principal’s office, moving at a snail’s pace compared to Rainbow’s furious exit. I hadn’t expected to see her for a while, so I was a bit surprised when I found her waiting for me not too far down the hall. She was leaning back against the wall, her arms crossed over her chest and a scowl on her lips. The glare she was hitting me with wasn’t quite on par with Mom or Principal Luna’s, but it looked way more hurt and angry than either of them.
I took a deep breath and tried to explain. “Dash, I...”
“You what?” she snapped, cutting me off before I could get any further. “You couldn’t have backed me up? Was that was too much to ask for?!”
I flinched. “Rainbow, do you really think she would’ve bought it?”
“She might’ve if you’d supported me!” Rainbow stomped over to me. “I always stood up for you when your mom was getting on your case. ‘Cause I’m your friend, and I knew you’d do the same for me.” She scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Shows what I know.”
“Or I’d just be doing detention with you,” I shot back.
“At least then I’d know you would back me up no matter what!” Rainbow snarled. “I thought you would want to be with me through thick and thin, but it turns out that being a team only counts when it’s convenient for you!”
Okay, I was done feeling guilty. She was acting like I’d sold her out and snitched! “Oh what the hell, Dash?! Excuse me for not being able to lie fast and convincingly enough to fool Luna without any advance notice! Especially when you had such a stupid cover story!”
Rainbow groaned. “Oh please. This is just typical of you! Whenever there’s some authority figure who frowns at you, you snap to and fire off a salute, then do whatever they say!”
Oh joy, she was getting into this nonsense again. Because the same thing we’d been butting heads over since middle school was definitely worth dredging back up again. “It’s called discipline and thinking more than five seconds into the future, Rainbow. I told you that prank was too big for you to get away with.” I groaned and massaged my temples. “You’re always doing this. You do stupid things that I tell you in advance are stupid, then get mad at me when it turns out that—what a shock—it was stupid and you shouldn’t’ve done it!”
Rainbow growled and poked me in the chest. “So now I’m stupid?! What’s next? Going to rub it in my face that I need help with my homework?!”
I threw my hands up in the air and let out a sound halfway between a groan and a scream. “Oh for the love of Shadow! You know that's not what I meant!”
“I don’t know what to think of you anymore,” Rainbow snapped. “After all, I thought that maybe my girlfriend would back me up no matter what, because that's what I’d have done for you! But I guess that’s not how our relationship works!”
“I did back you up!” I shouted. “I warned you exactly why turning the entire pool into jello was way too big to get away with, and that if you did it you’d get busted! Do you really think we would’ve fooled Luna?! She probably would’ve just tripped us up by asking what we were studying, or checked to see if anyone else could verify our story. I’m sure you’re not the first person who thought about having their girlfriend cover for them.”
“That's not the same!” Rainbow bit her lip, and I saw anger starting to fade away for a moment as pain took its place. That hurt a lot more than when she was yelling at me. “We’re not the same. We’re ... we’re special. We’re supposed to be on the same page and be out for each other no matter what but ... but you weren’t.”
For some reason, seeing her like that just made me even madder at her. Like I was some horrible person who made her cry just because...
I growled and shook my head. “I am there for you, Dash. I did the best, most supportive thing I could and told you it was a bad idea. I’m just not gonna go along with every harebrained poorly thought-out plan you cook up. Especially not the ones I tell you that you shouldn’t do in the first place!” I groaned and tried to rub away my budding headache. “Maybe if you actually listened to me when I told you things instead of just treating me like my opinion doesn’t matter, then doing whatever it is you want and expecting me to be your sidekick with a ready alibi...”
“For the love of—” Rainbow stomped down on the floor, letting out an exasperated sigh. “I did that to cheer you up, you big stupid butthead! I know you were bummed ‘cause you had to miss out on that thing with your cousins.”
Ugh. That. Missing out on the chance to shoot my family with toy guns was a bit depressing, but I was dealing. All the test work Sunset had me going through to stabilize my weird magic powers was going well, but even if they were ninety-nine percent safe, that meant they were one percent unsafe. I wasn’t going to risk accidently blasting off someone’s arm with an airsoft pellet.
However, that wasn’t the point. “I didn’t ask you to turn the pool into jello, so don’t try to say it was for me. I told you not to do it!”
Rainbow rolled her eyes. “So I should just do whatever you tell me to?”
I scoffed and not-quite-murmured, “You’d get in a lot less trouble if you did...”
“I heard that!” Rainbow snapped.
“You were supposed to!” I threw right back at her.
Rainbow scowled and crossed her arms over her chest. “You’d also get in lot less trouble with your mom if you hadn’t started dating me.” She clenched her teeth and glared at me. “That make us a bad thing too?”
“That’s not what I said!” I growled and paced around, trying to blow off a little steam. It wasn’t working, so instead I spoke my mind. “At this point you’re just making stuff up so you’ll have more things to yell at me about!”
“Oh, please!” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “You think I just sit around coming up with evil schemes to give me an excuse to start a fight with you?! I just wanted a little support for something I thought would be fun for us to do together!”
“And I told you it was—” I cut myself off with a frustrated growl before I said something I’d end up regretting later. “You know what, forget it. I’m sick of going in circles with you. I'll see you around, Dash.”
“Fine!” She snapped. “I’m sick you being such a ... stupid ... head ... jerk ... dumb ... butt ... face ... GRAH!” She turned her back on me, storming off.
“Yeah, well, same to you!” I stomped off in the opposite direction.
After the fight with my butthead girlfriend, I went driving for a while. I didn’t really have any destination in mind, I just wanted to blow off a little steam before I went home. I was way too mad to want to be around anyone I cared about after putting up with Rainbow being so ... Rainbow. It’s not like it was the first time we’d fought, but this was one of the nastiest ones we’d had, and the first big one since we’d become more than just friends.
Gyah! Why did she have to be such a stupid, stubborn, mule-headed...
By the time I got home, I was almost late for dinner. Or maybe I should upgrade that to actually late, judging by the smell coming from the kitchen. I shut the door behind me, and was a bit surprised by how loud it was. I hadn’t exactly been trying to sneak in, but I hadn’t meant to shut it quite so ... forcefully.
Mom being Mom, it took her all of five seconds after I came home to find something to get on my case about. She didn’t even wait to see me, just called out from the kitchen. “Don’t slam the door, Cloud.”
“I didn’t,” I grumbled under my breath. Sure, maybe the door had closed a little louder and harder than I’d planned, but that wasn’t my fault.
Dad was helping Mom out in the kitchen, but the others were already waiting for me at the dinner table. Alula seemed to be more interested in the food than me, but Sparks just couldn’t resist the chance to be her usual annoyingly bratty self. “Good morning. You’re just in time for breakfast.”
I grunted and flopped into my chair, doing my best to ignore her. Even at her most irritating, Sparks had nothing on a certain butthead with multi-colored hair. A minute later Mom and Dad brought in dinner. Meatloaf. Yay.
Once all the food was in place and my sisters started digging in, Mom turned her full attention to me. “And where have you been all evening?”
“Out.”
Shock of all shocks, that wasn’t enough for her. “Out where?”
I really wasn’t in the mood to put up with this. Not after the day I’d had. “Out. You know, as in not here.”
Mom’s eyes darkened, and I caught the hint of a warning growl that usually came before I got grounded or assigned extra chores. “Cloud...”
I ignored her, carving off a big chunk of meat before loading my plate down with mashed potatoes and vegetables. After putting up with Rainbow being a complete pain, the last thing I wanted was another lecture from Mom.
From the way she was frowning at me, I had a feeling I was going to get a talking-to whether I wanted it or not. However, Dad put a hand on her shoulder and whispered something to her, which was evidently enough to make her drop it. He then pointedly changed the subject. “So how was your day, Sparkler?”
Sparks shrugged. “Not too bad. Did the whole school thing. Got that history test back, and it was an A.” She gave that news just enough time to sink in before making her move. “Anyway, Star said she’s got an airsoft thing next month that she can take a Plus One to—if s’cool with you...” She shot a hopeful look Mom and Dad’s way.
Mom let out one of her noncommittal thinking grunts. “That should be alright, so long as you keep bringing home A’s on your tests and it doesn’t run up against anything on the schedule. But make sure to wear proper safety equipment while using those things.”
“We’ve had more than enough scares lately,” Dad agreed, his eyes flicking over to me. I flexed my right hand at the memory of the ... incident with the nerf gun. Thankfully, everything had healed up quick and easy, and about all the trouble I had now was a few exercises I was supposed to keep doing to make sure I kept full range of motion. Knowing I hadn’t permanently messed up my hand was definitely a relief.
Sparkler rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry, Star’s been through all the safety stuff with me, and she’s got some spare gear I can borrow—facemask, goggles, even a tactical vest. S’a step up from that Nerf gun fight we had last month, and we should be fine as long as Cloud stays far away.”
While I rolled my eyes at Sparks, Alula wasted no time jumping in. “So if Cloud’s not allowed, can I come? That sounds cool.”
Sparkler shrugged. “I suppose Team Kicker is down a player for all things toy gun related until Cloud’s stuff gets worked out. I’d have to ask Star, but I bet she’d be cool with it.”
“Doesn’t matter if she is,” Mom grunted out. “Alula’s still a bit young for airsoft guns.”
“Awww!” Alula unleashed her best pouting frown. “But Mooom! I’ll be careful!”
“That’s what everyone said before the Nerf fight last month.” Mom’s eyes flicked over to me, leaving the rest unsaid. “You can have plenty of fun with that nice Nerf gun we got you a few weeks ago.”
Alula scowled and crossed her arms. “But I don’t wanna play with that stupid little kid toy, I wanna play with Sparky and Star!”
Mom and Dad traded a look, and he took over. “Maybe next time, ‘Lula. Most of the safety gear they have probably wouldn’t be the right size for you anyway. Tell you what, next time we have a free weekend we can go shopping and look around.”
That managed to make a tiny dent in Alula’s grumpiness, but only a little bit. Though speaking of weekends and my plans for them... “You’re still good to take me and Sparks to the wargaming tournament this weekend, right?”
Mom cut in before Dad could answer. “I thought part of why we bought you a car was so you wouldn’t have to keep asking us for rides to spend time with your friends? And not so you would stay out late at night?”
“S’a matter of storage space,” Sparks answered for me. “Cloud’s car is cool and all, but it’s a compact. Between Cloud’s army of World War I wannabes, my army of stripper elves, Rainbow’s Legion of Awesome, and all the padding to keep ‘em safe...” She grinned at Dad, then added, “Plus he likes watching.”
Dad shrugged. “It’s fun. And really, wargaming is good practice for the girls.” He grinned. “Not to mention I heard Lieutenant Armor was bringing an army to the tournament, and the prospect of seeing him lose to Cloud or Sparkler...”
While Dad was chuckling at the idea of me or Sparks beat an actual soldier at a wargame, I had something much bigger on my mind. Dad was giving Rainbow a ride along with me and Sparks. Back when we’d first set up the whole wargaming tournament thing, that hadn’t been a big deal at all. Now ... well, I guess me and Miss Stupid Butthead would have to figure that out. Not like I wanted to kick her out or anything just because we’d had a fight but ... ugh. Why did she have to be such a...
Mom stared at me with a raised eyebrow. “Something wrong with your meal, Cloud? Meatloaf usually doesn’t require that much stabbing.”
“It’s fine.” The tiny part of my brain that wasn’t preoccupied with Rainbow noticed that my angry grunt of an answer sounded far too much like Mom.
Sparkler smirked and nudged our mutual little sister. “Maybe we can work together to hunt Cloud down next time we’re allowed to play as a family.” With a particularly evil glint in her eye, she added, “”Course, that’ll be easy—we just have to figure out where Rainbow is. Cloud’ll probably be too busy staring at her to actually focus on the match, assuming they don’t just sneak off to find somewhere to suck face.”
“Eeeew!” Alula whined. “That’s gross.”
Sparkler snickered. “Speaking of sucking face with Rainbow, who wants to take bets that’s why she was late in the first place?”
Willingness to tolerate stupid bratty little sisters fading ... fading ... gone. My fist slammed down on the table hard enough to rattle the plates and make everyone jump. “Oh shut up!”
Painful silence descended over the table for several seconds, until Mom broke it. “Sparkler, stop teasing your sister. Cloud, we don't tell family to shut up.”
Sparkler shuffled in her seat, staring guiltily down at her food. “I was just kidding,” she mumbled. “Didn’t have to bite my head off...”
For a dark moment I was almost tempted to point out that Sparkler wasn’t really family, but Sparks already looked way too miserable for me to keep hitting her while she was down. And as soon as I calmed down enough to not go after Sparks again, I also realized I probably needed to go cool down before I said something horrible I’d regret later. “Forget it. I’ve got homework.” I got up and headed for my room, ignoring Dad when he called out after me.
Once I was all by myself, I flopped down on my bed and groaned. Contrary to what I’d just told everyone else, I didn’t have any homework to worry about. Well, nothing serious or urgent—what I had could wait until after I decided whether I wanted to call Rainbow to scream at her, or just apologize and try to fix everything. Maybe both at the same time.
Before I could figure it out, someone knocked on my door. Clearly they hadn’t gotten the message at dinner. “Go away.”
“No,” Mom’s voice answered. “We’re coming in.”
I thought about trying to lock them out, but knowing Mom she’d just kick the door down or pick the lock. Soon enough both my parents were in my room, frowning down at me. Dad broke the ice. “Mind telling us what that was all about?”
Ugh. Parents could be so clueless sometimes. “Nothing.” I rolled over in bed, turning my back to them. You’d think they would’ve realized that the whole reason I came up here because I didn’t want to talk to anyone.
Mom pointedly closed the door behind her, locking it. “You just made a scene in the middle of dinner. That’s a lot more than nothing.”
Dad nodded along. “Exactly. Now what’s going on?” He frowned and rubbed his chin. “If I had to guess ... considering it was Sparkler teasing you about Rainbow that seemed to set you off, was she right about you two?” He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “It’s ... I can’t say I’m wild about you sneaking off with her for a few hours of private time, but all things considered it’s one of the least worrying things you could be doing.”
I scoffed and rolled my eyes. “You wouldn’t understand.”
Mom shook her head, more to Dad than me. “I think I know what this is. You had a fight with her, didn’t you?”
“Oh.” Dad cleared his throat, trading a look with Mom. “Well ... I can’t say this is exactly the same, but your Mother and I have had a few disagreements in the past. If you’d just tell us what happened, I’m sure there’s something we could do to help.”
I groaned and buried my head in my pillow. “It’s not the same. I mean, you two are married and stuff. Not to mention, you know ... the whole gay thing.”
“Do you really think that makes a difference?” Dad asked. “Relationships still follow most of the same rules regardless of that. I’m sure that if Wind were here she’d tell you that gender doesn’t make any difference when it comes to the importance of communicating clearly and respecting each other. And if you’re really that worried about it ... well, your mother had her own girlfriend issues before we met.”
“Wait—what?!” I tried to wrap my head around what he’d just said. “Mom?!”
Mom coughed and did one the last things I’d ever expected: she seemed to be looking at something over my shoulder, and her feet shifted a bit. If I didn’t know better, I’d think she might actually be a little bit ... embarrassed. “Your dad wasn’t the first person I dated. We didn’t even meet until during college.”
I knew that much, the big thing was... “And you—um ... with other girls?”
“Yes.” She hastened to add, “Of course, that was a long time ago. I’ve been happily married to your father for twenty years now.”
“Huh.” That was ... huh. Out of all the things I ever could’ve learned about Mom, finding out that she was bi was pretty much the last thing I’d ever expected. It’s just ... well, by definition she and Dad had been a thing since before I was born. It was weird enough thinking about her being with someone else. Finding out that she wasn’t even straight was...
Dad cleared his throat. “The point being, there’s nothing you could say that we wouldn’t understand. We’ve had relationship issues, we’ve had girlfriends.” He grinned and added, “We were even teenagers, back when dinosaurs ruled the earth and everyone still used stone tools.”
Well ... between finding out about Mom and the fact that they clearly weren’t going to let this drop until I spilled the beans, I might as well see what they could do. “Uh. Right. Um. Well...” I tried to think of the best way to sum it all up. “Rainbow’s a butthead.”
Mom snorted something that almost sounded like a laugh. “So what did she do?”
I sighed and sat up to make this a proper conversation. “She pulled a prank today. I told her it was stupid, she’d be caught, and she shouldn’t do it. When she did it anyway and got caught, she asked me to lie to cover for her. I ... well, she’s got three weeks of detention now, and she’s blaming me for it.”
Mom frowned at me, then nodded to herself. “Ah, that would explain it. Blaming you is hardly fair, though. If she hadn’t done something she shouldn’t have been doing in the first place, then she wouldn’t be in detention.”
“Exactly,” Dad agreed. “If you don’t want to get punished for breaking the rules, don’t break them. As it stands, I think we’ll have to have a word about asking you to lie for her. You certainly shouldn’t feel guilty for doing the right thing.”
“Yeah, but she's mad at me ‘cause I didn’t back her up.” I folded my arms over my stomach. “It’s ... you know, we’ve always had each other’s backs, even back when we were just best friends. And ... well, it’s not like I’ve never...” I bit my lip. “Am I a bad girlfriend?”
“Hardly,” Dad answered. “Supporting your partner is an important part of any relationship, but there are lines you shouldn’t cross. She should know better than to ask you to compromise your own principles.”
“I guess, but...” I tried to think of the right way to put it. “It’s just—I mean, Rainbow is kinda huge on the loyalty thing. If things were the other way around, she would’ve gone along with whatever I said without a moment’s hesitation.” My eyes flicked over to Mom. “You always said your special forces guys needed to know they’d be a team where they can count on each other in a pinch. And ... well, Rainbow and I used to be that way. But now...”
“I would never ask your father or anyone on my team to lie to a superior officer or the authorities for me,” Mom countered. “Loyalty isn’t just a matter of supporting her unconditionally. I think you were doing exactly what a loyal partner should: you were telling her she was making a mistake and trying to keep her from getting into trouble.” She held up a hand to forestall any response from me. “That said, she was counting on your support, and you didn’t offer it. Just because you think she was being foolish doesn’t invalidate her feelings of betrayal.”
“But...” I groaned and buried my face in my hands. “So we agree that I shouldn’t have been obligated to back her up, but it’s also still totally fair for her to act like I stabbed her in the back by not supporting her?”
“Welcome to the world of relationships,” Dad murmured. “Sometimes there’s no way to win, just varying levels of bad options. What did she even do?”
“She turned the swimming pool into jello.”
Dad tried to keep a straight face, he really did. However, he wasn’t made of stone. A weak, strangled chuckle escaped, earning him one of Mom’s patented disapproving glowers. He shrugged helplessly. “Oh come on, Nim. You have to admit that’s funny.”
Mom thought about it for a second, then grunted. I couldn’t tell for sure if she was agreeing with Dad or just not arguing the point. She has a lot of different grunts.
“I never said it wasn’t cool, just that she couldn’t get away with it.” I made a noise that was something halfway between a groan and a chuckle. “I think she wanted everyone to know she did it. She barely even bothered with a cover story—I mean, she said we were in study hall together.”
Dad snorted softly, and even Mom smiled just a tiny bit.
“Yeah. It’s like she tried to come up with the most goody-two-shoes thing she could think of, without bothering to think about whether anyone would believe it.” I sighed and shook my head. “Even if I’d been fully on board with protecting her, there was no way I could make that sound good. This is why you’re supposed to work out the alibi before you get called in: if she’d asked me to set something up, I would’ve come up with something way more plausible.”
“You sound far too experienced at this for my liking,” Dad said with a frown.
“Purely hypothetical,” I assured him, even though that wasn’t strictly one hundred percent true. “Just saying, there were much better ways I could’ve covered for her. Like saying that we snuck off to make out somewhere. Way more believable. Maybe even try Rainbow’s story at first, then ‘confess’ to what we were really doing when Luna turned up the pressure.”
Mom and Dad traded a look, then fixed me with a joint stare. Both of them going full parental mode on me made it hard not to start sweating. “I said it was purely hypothetical. You know, a thought exercise. As in, I’ve never actually done that. Promise.”
Dad sighed and started massaging his forehead. “I think you’ve put far too much thought into how to get away with doing things you shouldn’t.”
“She is a teenager,” Mom murmured just loud enough for me to catch.
Dad slowly nodded along. “In any case, I can’t say I’m wild about the idea that you’re mad at Rainbow because she won’t go along with your ideas about how to more efficiently break the school rules while maintaining plausible deniability.”
Ugh, I’d said it was hypothetical. Why were they still bugging me about this? I groaned and started rubbing my forehead. “It’s not that, it’s just ... it’s like she doesn’t even listen to me sometimes. She just goes off and does whatever she wants, then expects me to have her back when it goes wrong. If I tell her something she doesn’t want to hear, like that her prank idea is too risky and she’s gonna get caught, she just ignores me.”
“So it’s a matter of communication?” Dad asked. “Okay, that makes sense. I know Wind always says that’s one of the number one problems she sees with couples. If you don’t feel like Rainbow values your opinion, that’s definitely a problem the two of you need to discuss.”
Mom nodded along. “There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to talk to someone and not being listened to. I have quite a bit of experience with that.”
Dad shot a look her way. “Just to be clear, when you say that you’re talking about the new soldiers in your unit, right? That’s not some sort of subtle warning sign that I need to listen to you more?”
Mom snorted. “Tor, when I want to warn you that you’re messing up it won’t be subtle.”
“Oh.” Dad chuckled nervously. “Well ... at least I’ll know.”
Mom put her attention back on me. “Speaking of subtlety, unless I miss my guess it would be wasted on Rainbow. If you want to get through to her, you have to put your foot down and tell her how things are. I’m not saying you should do that every time you two have a difference of opinion, but when it really matters you need to stand your ground and make her hear you. It’s the only way to address the problem.”
Dad nodded along. “It’s what’s worked for me and Nim.”
“Okay then.” I still wasn’t sure what worked for them would work for me and Dash, but it was worth a shot. “So I just need to sit her down and make sure she knows how I feel?”
“Essentially,” Dad agreed. “Though perhaps you should give things some time to cool off first. Rainbow’s a very passionate young lady, and you...” He chuckled softly. “Well, you and your mother have a lot in common.”
Mom turned to him with a raised eyebrow. “And what exactly is that supposed to mean, dear?”
“Yeah, Dad.” I crossed my arms over my chest and glared at him. “What does that mean?”
Dad swallowed, his eyes darting between the two of us, then he quickly pulled us into a hug. “It means that you’re both very beautiful women whom I love very, very much.”
“Good answer,” Mom murmured.
“Nice save,” I agreed.
Dad cleared his throat. “Moving on, I’m sure you and Rainbow can work things out. This isn’t the first time you two have butted heads and it probably won’t be the last, but you’ve always made up once you were done being mad at each other.”
“I guess, yeah.” I sighed and scowled down at the pillow. “Probably needs to wait until we can manage a better apology than ‘I’m sorry you’re such a stupid butthead jerk.’”
“I don’t think they make a card for that,” Dad agreed. “In the meantime, you can get some practice by apologizing to your sisters.”
“Right.” I grimaced at the reminder of exactly what had sparked the whole conversation. In hindsight, I’d kind of blown up at Sparkler when she hadn’t really done anything to deserve it. “Sorry about messing up dinner.”
“It’s not the end of the world.” Dad gave me a quick hug. “You made a mistake, and now you’re going to fix it. Happens to all of us.”
“Just don’t do it again.” Mom grumbled. “If you’ve got a problem, talk with us about it. Don’t shut us out, and definitely don’t take it out on your family.”
“Yes ma'am,” I replied, almost automatically.
Mom reached over to pat my shoulder. “Feeling a bit better now?”
“Yeah. thanks for the talk. It helped.” If nothing else, just getting it all off my chest was a relief. I’d kind of just ... bottled it all up inside, until I’d exploded. I’m sure Aunt Wind would have a lot to say about how unhealthy that was. And speaking of not talking to loved ones... “Never knew you were bi, Mom. That’s ... well, makes me feel slightly less weird about being gay.”
Mom sighed and shot a look Dad’s way. “It’s ... not something that’s been particularly relevant for many years, but if it helps you to know that, I’m glad. Your father and I don’t care who it is you like, as long as you’re happy and whoever you’re dating treats you well and is respectable.”
“‘Respectable’?” I couldn’t help grinning at them. “I’ve heard Dash called a lot of things, but I never figured I’d hear that.”
Dad shrugged. “Perhaps that’s not the best word for her, but on the grand scale of high school romantic partners, she doesn’t encourage you to drink, smoke, do drugs, or neglect your schoolwork. The worst she’s done as far as getting you into trouble at school is try to drag you into a few mostly harmless and legitimately funny pranks.” He grimaced a bit as he added, “And ... well, I would prefer if you two weren’t quite as eager to move things along physically, but at least we don’t need to worry about diseases or pregnancy.”
“The secret perks to raising a lesbian,” I agreed with a grin.
“Quite,” Mom murmured dryly. “More importantly, despite a few minor imperfections Rainbow is a very devoted young lady who clearly adores you.” With a hint of a grin, she added, “And whenever I clean my guns in front of her, she strikes a nice balance between respect and barely concealed terror.”
I groaned and buried my face in my hands “Moooom! Are you seriously doing that?!”
“Well, it is tradition.”
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You had me at wargames. Why? This site, and fandom for that matter, has a serious lack of ponies or people playing them.
9002600
Also, human cloud is ok with monogamy, as opposed to her "anything-that-moves" counterpart.
Well Pregnancy is off the table, but catching something from her partner is entirely possible.
This was a really fun chapter, especially Cloud finding out that her mom is bisexual. Though there is one thing I’m curious about. Cloud said “For the love of Shadow.” Who is Shadow in this universe? Is she still some super important historical figure who has a religion based on her, or what? I know this isn’t really relevant to the story (which I’m really excited to see more of) but it is definitely something that I’m curious to know.
9002918
True, though the fact that neither of them had prior partners and they’re monogamous makes that fairly unlikely.
I am completely on board with Cloud. This was totally Rainbow's fault. Once more, I don't understand why Cloud, or ANYONE, puts up with Rainbow. She's kind of awful.
And yeah, I'm curious about the Shadow comment as well.
Well, If I had put money against Dash and Cloud being an "item" I would have lost big time. 😛
I liked to flow of this chapter it was a fun chapter to read and I look forward to seeing the next one. 😀
9002918
Pregnancy is CURRENTLY off the table, but if Equestrian magic keeps flowing into the area, then it's only a matter of time before Rainbow and Cloud find themselves pregnant with a "love child" as Chengar calls those conceived with love magic.
L
L! Military mom is awesome!
It's kind of nice to see a more understanding side of Nimbus. She's a bit less of an... ass this time around? You see her be more supportive overall, I feel.
9004642
Well, we haven't really seen much of Nimbus (instead of a Changeling impersonating her and deliberately ruining Nimbus' relationships) after all. Actually, I think the Oncoming Storm stories have shown us the most of Nimbus of anything in the Winning'verse.
And I second those requests for more information on Shadow Kicker in the Human!World.
9006258
I was talking about the Nimbus from the Oncoming Storm series. She's every bit a hardass as the Pony version of Kicker tells us, but I still feel like we've seen awfully little of a more maternal side of her. And that's why I like this chapter because it shows a bit of a kinder side of her.
9006355
Well, Pony!Nimbus struggled with being a good mother, Human!Nimbus may just have managed it better (having the extra daughter around likely helped).
But you're right, seeing a softer Nimbus (even if it's only a little softer) is a nice change.
I've wondered if the humans still venerate Shadow Kicker. There's definitely a story there...
In any case, excellent setup for some believable relationship drama. It's far too easy to make this sort of conflict arise from contrived misunderstandings, but this scenario is very well conceived. Looking forward to seeing what happens next.
9003007
That is certainly a very good defense against STDs, but that remains due to the fact that they've never engaged in sexual activities (assuming they have engaged in any so far) with anyone but each other, not the fact that they're the same sex.
9003018
I second this. Pony Dash is bad enough, but actually has some good qualities for balance. Human Dash lacks nearly all of those.
9008429
What good qualities?
9007296
if i rember correctly its mentioned in the first oncoming storm that they banged in the locker room and that made things all awkward for them
When Cloud says "Yeah. Thanks for the talk." You didn't capitalize Thanks.
9008580
Well occasionally she is a very good friend. She also helped to save the world from eternal night and chaos.
She is charismatic and inspire ponies to do better and seems to be pretty good at her job. At least she usually feels guilty when she end up hurting somepony and beats herself up about it.
She has plenty of bad qualities to balance them out but I can see why most of her friends put up with her.
Cloud not horse, meet horse Cloud. And if things are going the way these things tend too, you're about to make the whole of the scientific field of biology cry.
9002918
Not sure. The equestrian magic is showing up so magic of love could show up.
Somepony explain to me what exactly these armies are. Death Korps of Krieg for Cloud from Warhammer 40k, and the old Dark Elves from Warhammer Fantasy Battle is what I'm reading.
Or keep reading?
Ok actually what the Fuck! I know they get on each others nerves and Sparkler can be really annoying, plus Cloud Kicker is really angry but does Cloud really not consider Sparkler family? I don't think this is the attitude or thought you would have towards your real sibling(who happens to be from a different set of egg and sperm). Like because Sparkler is annoying her Cloud stops considering her family? Or did Cloud never consider Sparkler family in the fist place?
9699452
More that a very angry, depressed, and pissed off Cloud nearly said the most hurtful thing she could think of, just because that’s the sort of stupid thing angry/depressed people do sometimes.
Obvious immediate problem with backing that up: Cloud doesn't know when it happened.