• Member Since 9th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 9th, 2017

The dead Pixel Brony


Dead Account

Comments ( 76 )

Interesting start, though the ending was a bit odd.

Kids having a near death experience to fall asleep rather than to just faint from all the gore.

997210

Well... At lest one fuck-up is better then a fuck-ton, right? I see it as progress. Did you see anything else wrong, or was that it?

Criticism helps as long as you are able to take it into consideration.

Why? WHY YOU DON'T EVEN MENTION WHAT IS THE CROSSOVER ABOUT?!!?!??!?! :twilightangry2: :twilightangry2: :twilightangry2:

If there's ONE thing I hate about crossovers is that the author NEVER points out what the crossover is about.
I would guess this one is Gears of War but i'm not sure since I didn't read it yet.

Gears of War, GEARS OF FUCKING WAR!! The most, fucking, epic game ever!! I bought gears of war 1 on the premiere day. And then gears 2, limited, and gears 3, also limited! FUCK YEAH!

997464
Did you look at the picture? Gears. Also, you haven't read it yet. your point is invalid.

99749I love gears of war as well, but what did you think of the story. ಠ_ಠ

you sir have my attention.
and odd ending to that chapter though i can allready see this will be good
ill be waiting patiently for the next update:twilightsmile:

997597 Hey, you talking to me about the story?
It's. Fucking. Awesome. FTW!!

Bloody brilliant, my good sir!
:yay:

Very interesting. I look forward for the next chapter.

997768
997823
997937
My reaction to any good reactions my story's get:
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw3426_medium.jpg

But for cereal...

I'm doing this right now:
i.imgur.com/SZ5bm.gif

yay.

997464 The tag in the story pic said "Property of the coalition of ordered government" Also known as, the cog.

998498 To be honest I didn't know what that tags meant since I played only GOW 1 and I didn't find anything like that in the game.

999605 I figured out that it meant that for COG and, the tag was in the shape of a cog.

999612 However if nobody never played any GOW game how is he/she supposed to know what's the crossover about?

I like it but you should think about getting a pre-reader to help iron out any mistakes.

BTW It's 'through' not 'thru'

1011427

Thru is a simplified version of through, therefore it isn't a 'proper' word. I'm not really too bothered by it. I like the story anyway.

1011549
And that's why I usually don't care when people say that. It's not a problem, so why make one?

1042521>>1043370

Feedback is a way for the author to know how well they did and what the people want moar of.

1046094 Lol, and feedback is something authors shouldn't dismiss. People are gonna point out typos. Then we, as authors, fix them. It's the way of the world(by the way, you forgot the "S" in "honestly" in the title of chapter 2, just to start. You have numerous typos and grammar errors). Slip Kid made a valid point, the word is "through". "Thru" is a word invented by fast food chains, and should never be used in a narrative. It's like when people say "sk8" and mean "skate". If you want to make your story seem more professional, you should try to use proper English. Get yourself an editor/pre-reader, it's seriously super helpful. As for the story itself, it's a fairly fun read so far. You made a bold move in bringing your own original Gear to Equestria, and I can respect that. It gives you allot more creative freedom, and I really like the dreams/flashbacks with Dedrick's sister. I'm interested to see what kind of conflict you have in store for your COG.

OH GOD WHY ARE YOU TAKING SO LONG TO CREATE CHAPTERS! :flutterrage:

I WILL MARRY YOU IF YOU UPDATE MORE OFTEN! :flutterrage:

I'M A VERY BEAUTIFUL OVERWEIGHT MAN AND I KNOW HOW TO PLEASE MY STALLION!:flutterrage:

1064600
I put up a blog post about why. Not till the 27th aor so.

1064600
I, just now, read your full comment. The chapter will be up some time this week.



Once I find a editor.
1055034
Are you offering?

To be honest, I rushed this. If there are any errors let me know and I will fix them asap. I just really hope it's not entirely FUBAR....

Anyways, enjoy all the same.

BRUMAK!!? How the tuck did that get there??:rainbowderp:

where the hell is a centaur when you need one

1228037>>1227961
I was wondering what you guys thought about the flow?
I'm really looking for some criticism here.


I'm also enjoying this new size selector

AWWW SHIT this is about to get real. a one man fucking one man army is in town and he is gonna fuck shit up.

1286859
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think this chapter could have been done better, the pacing seems off. Eh, oh well. Enjoy.:twilightsmile:

Hmmm, this is interesting.

1322841 I read fast. Oh, and for the people looking to be first:

1322966 Rather confusing, but that's expected, I think. Right now I'm kinda tired, I might come back in the morning to edit this and come up with something.

aww shit two man legion these two will fuck shit up so bad this is fucking better than a one man army but a two man unstoppable force nothing will be able to stop these two the are fucking unstoppable!... rainbow would be jealous.

Armored Kantus and an super COG soldier forming an alliance, this Brumak can go hide to his Momma!
MOAR

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