Princess Celestia gets a Colonoscopy

by twilightsparkle3562

Chapter 1: "Frequent Bouts of Constipation"

Every morning, Princess Celestia had a simple routine: wake up, raise the sun, have breakfast and do whatever needed to be done to help run her kingdom! However, there were times that Celestia would get so caught up in her duties, that she would forget to look after her own health and well-being. The pressures and demands of being the leader of a nation such as Equestria would often take a toll on Celestia and she wouldn't realize it until it was too late.

…

It all started one morning when Celestia and her sister, Princess Luna, were having breakfast. As the two sisters ate, Luna noticed that her sister had an uncomfortable look on her face.

"Sister, you look troubled," remarked Luna as she drank a cup of coffee. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing," grunted Celestia, her mind distracted for a moment. "My stomach has just been bothering me for a few days, that's all."

This made Luna stop what she was doing.

"Come to think of it, Celestia, this is the third time this week you have been complaining of your stomach. How has your eating been?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary. Why do you ask?"

"Because of the fact that every time we have an important dinner with dignitaries, you tend to be constipated and pained. Not to sound inappropriate, but…"

Celestia knew almost immediately that Luna was about to enter her personal space. Then again, she was her sister after all.

"Luna!" Celestia snapped, glaring at her younger sister as she rose from the table. "If you go so much as…"

"Sister," countered Luna, rising as well. "Your eating has been a bit of a concern to me and I think that you might have something wrong with your stomach. Perhaps maybe you should cut back on the heavy eating! It will help you when you have to do your private business."

All Celestia could do was raise an eyebrow in suspicion.

"Look," continued Luna, trying to sound reasonable. "I'm saying this because you are my sister and I love you, but you really have been having stomach problems and I think we should have your stomach checked out. How have you been doing your private business?"

"Excuse me?"

"I'm just asking."

"That's none of your concern, sister. You know better than to invade my personal space."

"I do, but there are times when we have to make exceptions to the rule and…"

Just then, Celestia felt a sudden surge of pain in her stomach and immediately darted out of the dining room in a flash. Luna began to suspect that her sister wasn't telling the entire truth and realized that something needed to be done. When Celestia returned, Luna decided to set the record straight.

"Look Celestia," she said, lightly stamping her front right hoof. "I think something might be wrong with your stomach and I think we need to have Dr. Crohn's take a look at you."

"Our personal gastroenterologist?"

"Yes. He might be able to give you an answer to what is wrong with your stomach."

"But, I have things I need to do, Luna."

Celestia was just about to walk away, when Luna pulled her back with her magic.

"They…can…wait," she said, firmly and clearly. "Something is wrong with you and you need to get looked at. The more you wait, the more pain you are going to get."

Luna's words gave Celestia an indication that she wasn't going to be backing down so easily. In any case, she had nowhere to run from her stomach problems and nowhere to hide.

…

Later that day, Celestia laid in her bedroom with Luna waiting for the gastroenterologist to arrive. A few moments later, the sounds of a knock were heard.

"Come in," answered Luna and the door opened to reveal a purple colored unicorn pony in a doctor's coat with a gray curly mane. "Thank you for coming on such short notice, Dr. Crohn's."

"Of course, Princess Luna," he chuckled as he turned his attention towards Celestia. "Now then, Princess Celestia. What seems to be the problem?"

"It's my stomach," Celestia answered, not wanting to invoke her little sister's nature any further. "It's been acting up."

"How have you been extracting your stools?"

This made Celestia feel very uncomfortable as she turned over flat on her back for Dr. Crohn's to inspect her stomach.

"Beg your pardon?"

"Your personal business."

"Oh, well, this may sound embarrassing, but…"

"Don't be," interrupted Dr. Crohn's in a soft voice. "Anything spoken between us doesn't leave this room. You have my word."

Celestia hesitated again, but Luna nodded for her to say her peace.

"Well, when I do my business," Celestia explained. "I feel like a river comes out of me almost as if it is mush."

As she spoke, Dr. Crohn's tapped his hooves on Celestia's stomach, trying to pinpoint the source of the disturbance.

"Mush did you say?" he asked.

"Yes, mush."

"Hmm, then it seems to me that you could have a case of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, which is that your bowels become irritable when you sometimes eat. Another possible factor is stress can trigger your bowels as well. Tell me, have your have any stressful moments lately? Not that everything is stressful to you?"

It took a moment for Celestia to answer his question.

"I've had a few stressful moments, yes. You know how it is being a princess and all."

"Then, in any case, I would possibly recommend maybe taking some time off from being a princess. Perhaps maybe two or three days at best."

Celestia was about to protest this suggestion, but Luna stopped her.

"Furthermore, the only way that we can get a proper diagnosis of your condition is that you are willing to undergo a colonoscopy."

Celestia felt herself sink upon hearing this. In her mind, she had no idea of the fact that her condition would result in her ending up having a procedure.

"Now, I know it's a major inconvenience," continued Dr. Crohn's as he reached into his saddlebag and handed a paper containing instructions for Celestia to follow leading up to the procedure. "But, I feel that as your gastroenterologist that a colonoscopy is the only way to go at this point. It is the only way that we will be able to find out whether or not you will have Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Now, I'm going to have to ask you to submit to a blood test before I go."

"Very well."

So, it was set. Princess Celestia, one of the four princesses of Equestria, was about to undergo a colonoscopy…

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[Speedy Silverstreak]

I will now recite a quote from a Tyler Perry movie:

"Hey Brown, hows your ass?"

"IT'S FINE!"

[Georg]

Well, when you turn fifty... centuries.

[WannaFlugelHorn]

8989485

[Pegasistermelover]

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