The Liar
The sun was bright, lighting the clear blue sky with an intensity unseasonable in winter, and it shone happily down on Twilight Sparkle and Applejack. They were to pay a visit to Fluttershy's cottage at the yellow mare's request; she had several dozen extremely ill hedgehogs to deal with and could not leave their side, even to get the research books she needed to combat their sickness. Twilight had offered to teleport her and Applejack straight there with the books but she was talked out of it; Applejack said that the bookworm looked as though she was about to fall asleep and cut her off, saying that she'd bring a cart round for the books. Besides, she opined, the walk would do her good.
Twilight had rocked back on her hooves slightly, feeling the blast of pain from them, and giggled to herself. She was pressed, and her lie was not found wanting by the farm pony, which was good; she'd had a very long time to prepare and had consulted a lot of books on psychology and cold reading to do so. That had been a bad night, according to the after-action report from her medical spells and from an exhausted, red-eyed Spike, and she'd vowed to make sure that the pain had been worth it.
She was challenged on the matter this morning when Applejack accused her of drifting off.
"Huh, wha? Sorry, Applejack. I was just, um... I was miles away." Twilight immediately cursed herself. The books had said that a lot depended on intonation and she'd let a little wobble of pain through. Applejack looked singularly unimpressed.
"Mah eye you wuz. Twilight Sparkle, Ah doan' appreciate bein' lied to, especially by one o' mah friends. Y'all were swayin' as yer walked an' ya didn't stop when Ah trod on yer hoof. Somethin' ain't right, missy, an' yer gonna tell me wh- HEY!" It was too late; the flash from the teleport had already begun to fade. "S-stupid gosh-darn Element of Magic... oh well, bes' be, be up an' doin'. Twilight'll sort hersel' out... Ah hope... Aw, horsefeathers, Ah'm gonna hafta tell the girls about this." She hitched up the cart on her back legs and set off again.
*******
"SPIIIIIKE!"
The aforementioned dragon nearly choked on an emerald and slid off of his chair, landing on the floor with an almighty crash. He picked himself up and scurried into the room. "Twilight, what's wrong?"
The mare had landed awkwardly after the teleport - an ankle, according to Spike's untrained but increasingly experienced eye, looked like it had twisted again - but that wasn't the source of Twilight's tears. She was sobbing again, for the second time in as many hours. As bad as it was now, he had a feeling that tonight would be worse.
"It's... i-i-it's Apple-*snff* Applejack. She's... she..." Once again, Twilight couldn't finish the sentence, her mind just crumbling into the flood and trailing down her face. Even the presence of a thin arm at her neck could not reassure her, nor the constant murmurs of support that blurred into one incoherent mass after a while. There was nothing to do but wait it out.
Just like they'd always done.
*******
"Who is it- oh, hey Applejack!" Rainbow Dash's disposition was perky but tired-looking; Fluttershy had apparently been having her fly to Zecora's hut and back for potion ingredients again. "I thought Twilight'd be with you. Trouble keeping up?"
"Uh... not exactly. Rainbow, can Ah come inside? Ah've still got all tha books fer-"
"Of course. Fluttershy's in the living room... boy, I need a nap. Fluttershy," the rainbow mare called, "AJ's here with the books you want- WHOA!"
A pink and yellow blur like a comet made of Battenburg cake snapped off the harnesses of the cart and dragged it into the living room, which had a crudely-made sign on it saying "Sick Bay" after a couple of abortive attempts at correctly spelling isolation.
Applejack looked at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash looked at Applejack.
This went on for just enough time for things to get really awkward.
"She's a little... intense right now," mumbled Rainbow Dash, breaking the silence much more quietly than was her usual wont. Applejack nodded, still rendered speechless from the speed Fluttershy had moved at. Her flank had a friction burn on it. "Whaddaya say we go into the kitchen and I'll fix us up a snack. Egg and cress sandwich okay?"
"Uh... sure. Sorry, Rainbow, it's jes' a shock ter see 'er like that. Firs' Twilight hidin', uh..." Applejack looked around warily. "Hidin' stuff, an' now Fluttershy's movin like you do and busy as a beehive... it's kinda creepy." The farmpony trotted into the kitchen, wherein her friend was unwrapping some egg and cress sandwiches from the tiny shop on the high street. She raised an eyebrow.
"What?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "You know how bad of a cook I am, I'm not going to put Fluttershy through it too. She's too delicate, so I've been letting her live the Rainbow Dash Diet."
Applejack's eyebrow twitched higher. "Takeout pizza, sandwiches courtesy of one Off License, a whole mess o' cans of... wait, you gave Fluttershy this?" She grabbed a large blue and silver can with a large red bull on it. "Have y'all actually got a brain in that thar head o' yours?"
"It's not my fault! I like the taste, she found it, it's sugar-free so I thought it'd be alright! I didn't expect her to burn through my stash overnight!" Rainbow's voice was a keening wail now, and Applejack covered her friend with a forearm.
"Hey now, sugarcube, it's alright. Ah ain't mad, Ah know how hard it is when somepony's workin' 'emselves to the bone an' they doan' see it." She shuddered at the memory of last applebuck season. Rainbow Dash smiled.
"It's hard, that's all," she said, some of her old swagger back, the way Applejack remembered her before... before. "I'm not used to Fluttershy in full-on doctor mode."
"Ah reckon as we'll all feel a mite better with some o' them dandy-lookin' sandwiches. We're gonna need our strength, Ah reckon." Applejack's mood darkened slightly as she sat at Fluttershy's table.
"How do you mean?" Rainbow returned with the plated sandwiches and a large bottle of dangerously-green drink, which Applejack sensibly declined. "Is this that thing about Twilight?"
Applejack looked at her hooves. Somewhere, a clock ticked. Fluttershy could be heard reading in the sitting room, shouting garbled instructions to ponies who weren't there and then bemoaning the incompetence of her non-existent staff. The clock still ticked. Rainbow Dash considered putting a wing around her ex, but though better of it.
"Well," Applejack said after fidgeting in her chair for a few minutes more, "Ah don't mean ter sound like a gossip or somethin', but... ain'tcha noticed how distant she's been gettin' ever since that scuffle we had with Discord? How she don't ever talk about herself?"
"That's gotta be a good thing, right? I mean, after that whole Mare Do Well-" Rainbow Dash's confused tone was cut off almost instantly.
"Not like this. You ask her how she is, you press her, you get nothin'. An' Ah reckon she's..." Applejack padded across the kitchen and eased shut the door, then dropped her voice to a whisper. "She's on somethin'."
"On something? Twilight? Please. She's too big of an egghead to be a Trank addict on the side, AJ, you're imagining it-"
"Am Ah, Rainbow Dash? Jes' this morning, Ah turns up at her house at ten thirty, she's only jes' got up."
"Uh, I do that. Like, all the time. And I'm not on Trank."
"Well, that's true, ah guess. Anyway, though, we were takin' the books up here when Ah trod on 'er hoof by accident. No sale. She jes' kept walkin', swayin' a li'l bit an' keepin' 'er steps light. So Ah does it agin. Not a darned thing. An'... gosh, Ah ain't proud ta say this... Ah bucked 'er solid, right in the gut. She wheezes a little an' coughs up... somethin' weird-lookin'... but she don't even say a word about it ta me. That ain't right, Rainbow. That ain't right at all." There had been a little hairline fracture running through the orange pony's voice throughout proceedings, and now it was beginning to widen. "An', an' when Ah finally got 'er to wake up, she tries ter tell me she was jes' daydreamin', an' that's a lie, Rainbow, she's lyin' to her friend, an' Ah says so an' Ah says what Ah thinks of it an' she jes' up an' teleports outta there like Ah'm the Nightmare come back, an'... a-an' that hurt, right here. Ah'm worried sick an' Ah don' know what ta do."
After a few minutes, a deathly pale Rainbow let the plate slide out of her hooves and shatter on the polished floor.
*******
"Here, Twilight, drink this. Are you sure you didn't fall down? You look like you went five rounds with Ditzy Doo when the winner gets the keys to the muffin shop..." Spike was checking the pony over, his claws delicately tracing the outlines of some new bruises and tentatively checking for bone fragments. He had in his free hand a sippy cup full of Zecora's strongest painkiller potions, which he was proffering to the prone pony.
"don't wanna." Twilight's voice was almost inaudible, her throat worn out from an hour of tears.
"Please, Twilight... I made it. There's nothing that'll hurt you in here, I promise. You trust me, right? I'm your number one assistant..."
"... don't wanna. hurts."
"No, no, Twilight, look. It's painkillers. See?" Spike took a sip, despite his better judgement. "It's safe. I'm not hurt."
"promise?"
"I promise." Spike offered the cup again and Twilight took it, her magic still shaky as it brought the cup to her lips. Eventually, she forced the potion down - it tasted weirdly of grapes - and she got to her hooves.
"... okay... that, that's better. thank you spike." Practically every word was punctuated with a little rasping sniff. Twilight teleported up the stairs and settled down in the ancient corduroy-covered armchair she kept in her private study. Her dragon followed her and sat on the chair's arm, stroking her mane while she read quietly. Just like the old days, thought Spike. They were comfortable, and they sat there in each other's company just reading and being together.
Finally, Twilight broke the silence. "I... I think Applejack knows, Spike. Or at least suspects."
"Um... wow. That'd explain the new bruising on the ribs. What, um, what did she say?"
"She called me a liar when I gave the standard excuse... I don't know how I ever thought I'd convince her it was nothing. She said she trod on my hoof and I did nothing."
"That's probably a side effect of the-" Spike stopped himself and fished around in his mind for an adequate lie. "The pain you're in. C'mon, let's get some lunch. Or possibly dinner, seeing as how it's getting dark."
"Yes, Spike. I think... I think I can survive cooking." Twilight walked out of the door and-
WHAM
Spike sprinted after her, yelling her name. When he got to the landing, he paled in shock.
Applejack had Twilight pinned to the wall, the purple unicorn wheezing like a broken bellows. Beside her, Fluttershy was hovering with a stony expression and a slim torch, checking to see how Twilight's eyes moved. Spike turned and saw Rainbow Dash and Rarity looking on with utter disapproval. Pinkie Pie was nowhere to be seen.
"Would somepony tell me what the HAY this is?" The dragon erupted, rounding on Rainbow Dash and rolling up some non-existent sleeves. She sighed and brushed one hoof through her mane.
"Listen, Spike... Applejack told me what happened. I've seen this before, back at Junior Speedster's camp; one of my- one of the older teachers was an addict too."
"Addict? What do you mean, addict? Twilight's not on drugs, I'm her assistant, she wouldn't keep something like that from me!"
"I'm sorry, Spike. I'm really, really sorry. But we have to intervene. Painkiller addiction... it can destroy somepony. I saw it happen, and I won't let one of my friends go down that road."
Spike reeled backwards, color fading even further. "No. No no no no no, you guys have this wrong. This is my fault... this is all my fault..."
Rarity trotted over and put a hoof around his shoulders. "It's not, Spike. My... our friend did this of her own volition-"
"Except she didn't, because the first painkiller I've taken in years I took was today! Check the sippy cup on the sink." Twilight had recovered from the initial shock long enough to say her piece. "Tell her, Spike, tell them they're wrong-"
"STOP! LYIN'!"
The only sound for the next few moments was the echoes of Applejack slamming Twilight against the wall again. Then Applejack spoke, her eyes teary and voice crackling like an old radio.
"Ah hate this, Twilight. Don't y'all see? Ah don' wanna make ya sad, but yer, yer lyin' to me. Ah..." She sniffed, and collected herself. "Yer sick, Twilight. Yer on this stuff, alla those potions, an'... an'... an' we wan' our Twi back. Ah want mah friend back. So... look, Fluttershy, hurry it up already, will ya? This is hard."
Spike finally came round to the situation and leapt out of Rarity's hooves. If he could just get to the syringe she'd produced from a bag on the floor, maybe he could-
There was a rush of air and whiteness, which faded into dark.
*******
Fluttershy administered the sedative and watched her friend fall bonelessly against Applejack. As she blurred out of the door to get back to the hedgehogs, Rarity trotted up to the orange pony's side. "You didn't have to knock him out, Applejack" she said reproachfully.
"No... no Ah didn't. Come on, Nurse Tenderheart ain't gonna wait much longer." With that, the farm pony lugged the unconscious librarian down the stairs and onto the waiting pegasus ambulance. They clambered on board, saying subdued hellos to the slim, pretty nurse, and they were off.
"Hey, what gives? This isn't the way to Ponyville Gen!" Rainbow Dash had noticed that they were flying entirely the wrong way; instead of heading north, they were going west, towards Trottingham's Chalk Downs. She rounded on Tenderheart. "Where are you talking her?"
"Please, Miss Dash, calm down. Ponyville doesn't have the pastoral care requirements for someone with Miss Sparkle's... needs. We're taking her - and all of you - to a state-of-the-art center for just such ponies. It's only been open for two years; Princess Luna cut the ribbon herself. It won't take more than an hour, but it might be uncomfortable to stand still for that long. You might care to sit back down." The effect of her voice, which sounded like Fluttershy if she'd ever grown a spine, was profound. Rainbow Dash had gone pale again and slumped down next to Rarity. Applejack was on the unicorn's other shoulder, eyes invisible behind her mane and hat held before her in her hooves.
The hour passed, and the ambulance touched down. The sun was setting, but despite that the gardens seemed full of life and beauty. A little brook babbled gently underneath a handsome wrought-iron bridge. Flowers that glowed like phantasms coiled themselves around great trees, and the three conscious Elements felt more at peace, and up ahead they could see the hospital, a great stately home in the style of noted 18th-century architects Regent and Bath Stone. It seemed like Tenderheart had picked a good one.
Rarity leaned in towards Tenderheart. "Listen, I'm wealthy, very wealthy, and Twilight Sparkle is a personal friend. Send the bills to my-"
"That won't be necessary, Miss... Rarity, yes?" Rarity nodded and opened her mouth to protest, but Tenderheart cut her off. "Trottingham operates a free healthcare system paid for by taxes. It's enlightened; they don't leave anypony behind simply because they don't have insurance. It's been extremely successful so far. Ah, Doctor. I'm sorry to have dragged you out like this. This is the one I wrote to you about via dragonfire, Twilight Spar - oh..."
The Ponyville mares had stopped dead. This doctor was beautiful, her mane still perfectly ramrod-straight gold and her coat the very brightest silver. Even her cutie mark, a pale pink outline of an ouroboros with blue lightning bolts emanating from the centre of it, seemed to compliment her. Applejack's jaw hung open. Rarity's eyes widened. Dash's wings didn't pop open, but only by dint of considerable effort on her part.
"Dreadfully sorry about that, Tenderheart, happens all the time. My name's Shining Light, I'm the deputy treatment manager here at Moon River Hospice. I take it our latest arrival is on your back, Miss..."
"Uh, Applejack. Jes' that, Ah'm," she gulped, which caused a little giggle of nervousness to escape from her lips afterwards, "Ah'm afraid Ah ain't no great beauty - Ah mean, Ah, um... Ah ain't got a lot o' fancy titles, but Ah looks out fer mah friends. Please... help her."
Shining Light smiled. "I'll do my very best, Applejack. Depend upon it. Now, I think I should take Twilight Sparkle to her room. It wouldn't do to keep her out here much longer, after all, there's a cold night scheduled again. Associates!" She clapped her hooves and five burly-looking orderly stallions trotted into view, their muscles working languidly beneath their tight white uniforms in a manner that made Rarity feel the need to have a very long lie down with a cheap romantic potboiler. "Take Ms. Sparkle to her apartment. She's obviously had a very difficult day... as have her friends. May I press you to supper here?"
"I'm afraid we need to get back to Ponyville. See you soon, Shining Light!"
"Indeed. Farewell." Shining Light waved goodbye, smiling brightly. Once they'd disappeared out of sight, the wards around the doors flared and jabbed the minds of all the Elements present. Once they arrived home, they'd never remember having been here... or the pony they'd dropped off. With a smile, she cantered back into the hospital and dragged her boss down to Processing.
"Twilight Sparkle," said the doctor in question as her orderlies began busily locking her in a straitjacket, "I told you before. Nopony escapes Aklespia Caducea."
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Word of advice, To a professional, A prologue shows incompetence and lack of skill because its an easy way for the writer to explain things without doing as much or any work at all.
I see to many stories ruin what would of made some great first chapter material that would of made me interested with prologues.
Other than that, i would say that this story is alright, Ill give it a track and see if it goes anywhere
Cheers
~iraqlobstah
58436
I beg to differ. A prologue can be artfully done and set the scene of a story or even be used to introduce the conflict.
Lactating Lesbian Lingerie ?
This terrifies me. I'm being absolutely serious. This scares me so much I won't be able to continue reading.
It reminds me too much of Stephen King... or, more correctly, one of his movies. The one about the famous author who ends up in a car accident and get's saved by a fan of his who lives nearby. Said fan is a psychotic bitch that is obsesed with one of his book series, and was disappointed with the latest release was the last one, and spent some time being tortured until he completed a new book for the series.
"Misery" is the name... and I'll never be able to get out what she did to his legs alone in that movie....
So with that, I salute you all, and hope you have a great time with this story.
With that, I jump ship. LATER!
58458 PS. If you want to reply to these messages, send them via Private Message. Once I leave, I'll refuse to return.
58458
lulz
58449
Thats what first chapters are for. ._.
Cheers
~iraqlobstah
58482
A writer is free to structure his story however he likes. It makes no difference whether the first part is called Prologue or Chapter 1.
Arguing that one should call it chapter 1 because YOU think it looks better is a pointless cause.
O.o......why do I want more?
>> IraqLobstah
I'm glad you like my work, but it was never really intended as a prologue. It is, in fact, the opening chapter, just considerably shorter than the other one because I wrote it in about an hour. It's an explanation (albeit vague) of what the hell's happening to Twilight and how Spike is trying to help. If you do want something where the first chapter couldn't possibly be a prologue, though, try a Discworld book...
>> McSqueakers
Thanks for sticking up for writers everywhere to write how they want to. In my case, badly.
>> Gypsy
If you would like to write a three-chapter clopfic based on the work once it's done, I have no power to stop you.
>> Balancer
Because you do. Wants and needs are strange creatures; indeed, that's a plot point later on.
Scott, you need to use the "L" word. Lesbian? I mean the other "L" word. Lesbians? I meant love Scott, wasn't trying to trick you.
58514
Someones mad.
Excuse me for expressing my opinion on the matter
Cheers
~Iraqlobstah
58659
You're as much entitled to your opinion as McSqueaker is to theirs. Also, point of order, the phrase 'just expressing my opinion' is generally taken to mean 'oh shit, I've been found out, better make the other person look bad by acting passive aggressive.' Also also, I think your post is missing a princess there, in addition to the apostrophe (which, might I say, generally looks bad in the eyes of a professional).
By all things unsavory, this is amazing! Smells like classic psycho!treatment trope, (bad doctor mode), with a nice diagnostic twist, and ponies!
Keep up the good work! Subscribed and looking forward to the next chapter.
58675
Well then....
I need to go get some Swag Action.
Pinkie has been waiting all day for this, (no not that you filthy minded idiot).
*flies away*
Cheers
~iraqlobstah
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"Scott, you need to use the "L" word. Lesbian? I mean the other "L" word. Lesbians? I meant love Scott, wasn't trying to trick you."
Exactly what I was thinking
Lawks-a-mercy! I eagerly await the rest of the story; if only in hope that it will show that this tragic opening serves to bring the dramatic adversity necessary for a climactic redemption.
(But mainly so I can do another dramatic reading. The last one was so fun!)
61674 I assure you, it was equally fun to listen to. You did a cracking job. New chapter should be up before Thursday. I do 'em mostly for the WTG on deviantArt and post them here because, well, it's more convenient and I can get a wider audience.
I was a bit hesitant at the beginning but am now glad that I read this. It looks like it'll be possibly quite interesting though I feel damn sorry for Twilight.
74555
Of course, you are right. I really do need to work on this a bit more than I did, the scenes with AJ and RD interacting in particular. Indeed, Rainbow Dash should definitely be a lot shier around her than normal - we'll see why next chapter, but suffice it to say that it ties into another story I've written - and I think Pinkie should've got some airtime. All to be edited in future. Your points are, as ever, excellent, and your compliments are, as ever, extremely welcome. =]
I question "why". Only "why." just why it is necessay.
I am absolutely terrified but the way you have written this makes me keep going
(spoiler?)
)) may come from a story I described as a comment on chapter 1....
"Rainbow Dash considered putting a wing around her ex, but though better of it."
Lol something is going on here :] I may aswell have read more than one story leading to this story then... (first I recoon may be the inclination from Chapter 1 from Spike to Twi: "she can't hurt you anymore" "she"-being Pinkie Pie (I dont think that's true anymore thou
Suffice to say: I LIKE this! :D Keep writing!
Well, hum.. Dunno if I'll continue, err. That was nice but I don't like to see Twilight hurt :(
Anyway, there's two things that might need to be fixed :
"Whereare you talking her?"
You meant taking, I think.
"How do you mean?"
That one was probably "What"; or this is a structure I don't know.
My biggest problem with this chapter is they didn't actually seem to confirm anything.
They had a HUNCH that she might have been on something, grabbed her, knocked her out, then shipped her off to a center.
There was no confirmation attempt to make sure she was a druggy at all.
And this is why you shouldn't lie to your friends. Because once you do they will jump to conclusion saying your addicted to something. Good chapter can't wait to read the next one.
"I told you before. Nopony escapes Aklespia Caducea."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
one flew east, one flew west, and ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST
OH GOD IT'S NURSE RATCHED ALL OVER AGAIN
I haven't finished the chapter yet and I just read rainbow dash refer to applejack as her...ex? Wtf
(other then my hatred for appledash good story)
What the hell is going on
.
..
...
....what? I'm confused.