Recovery

by Soufriere

Chapter Two: Message

“I can’t believe Sunny actually wrote back!” Princess Cadance gushed with a level of giddiness more akin to a teenaged mare than the ruler of a satellite principality.

“She has, but…” Princess Celestia trailed off.

“But?”

“A question please, Cadance: How well-versed are you in Classical Equestrian?” asked Celestia with utmost seriousness.

Cadance thought for a moment before answering. “Since the Crystal Empire is literally one thousand twenty-four years displaced from its setting thanks to the first battle against Sombra, the runes are still in regular use there. But I quickly discovered their speech is surprisingly modern and becoming more so by the day as we reintegrate with Equestria. When I asked the Culture Minister about it, he said the Crystal Ponies wish to communicate with their modern-day brethren but prefer using the runes out of a sense of tradition and to subconsciously connect with the world they lost. Also, to differentiate themselves psychologically from Equestria proper,” she explained.

“That is a lovely overview of your subjects and their lives,” said Celestia, “But it does not answer my question.”

“Oh! Sorry,” Cadance said, dipping her head slightly. “So, although I can read the runes themselves fluently, the ancient language itself looks like gobbledygook to me half the time. Even with access to hundreds of texts written in the language, as well as helpful translation guides from the prewar period, I haven’t really had the time or need to study up on it.”

Celestia shook her head, a slight grin barely intruding upon her face. “I thought that might be the case. Sunset Shimmer wrote this in full-on Classical Equestrian. I do not know whether or not she is aware of your lack of proficiency. Nonetheless, it seems I must read the letter aloud to you.”

“Forgive me, Princess,” said Cadance, reverting psychologically back to her days when Celestia was grooming her to assume her place atop the Crystal Empire if it happened to emerge from its time-slip during her lifetime.

“It is okay,” Celestia assured her, placing a hoof on her shoulder. “You are not in trouble. Why would any pony bother holding onto knowledge they no longer need? Except for myself and Luna, that is.”

Cadance attempted to reconcile her feelings of guilt with her lingering excitement over the note from Sunset. Failing that, she figured she would just say what needed to be said. “Would you please read me the note?”

Celestia nodded with a smile. “Sunset’s usage is not perfect either, but I can easily understand what she’s trying to say and translate colloquially.” Levitating the book in front of her and opening it once again to the correct page, she cleared her throat and began…

Dear Caddy,

It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? About ten years. Twilight tells me you run the Crystal Empire – never expected it to come out of the time-slip while we were still alive – and you married her older brother. Congratulations on that, by the way. If you’re still anything like the mare from the next tower over I remember from when I was growing up, you’re probably an amazing leader and every pony loves you. You deserve nothing less.

Okay, now that the pleasantries are out of the way, I’ll get to the point. you’re probably wondering why I wrote to you instead of literally any pony else. Well, I’ve been thinking a lot about the past lately. Specifically, all the mistakes I made during my years in Canterlot. You saw so much of it first-hoof.

Part of me wants to apologize to you, but I see little point in doing so through a transdimensional letter. Instead, I want to thank you.

I know why you moved Starswirl’s mirror from Canterlot to the Crystal Empire. You thought I might be more likely to not overreact if, once I returned, the first face I saw was a sympathetic one. You weren’t wrong.

In fact, when I crossed the threshold, earlier that day last year, I hid behind the mirror and heard every word you said when you came in before Twilight’s state visit. I’m sorry I did not show myself at the time. I was still too afraid to face you.

I didn’t know until that day how much you valued our relationship, however fraught it was. Even after Princess Celestia rejected me and discovered my replacement, you still believed in me. Even though I spent most of our time together ignoring you or pushing you away or snapping at you, you never stopped trying to be my friend. Even after I left this world, you took possession of the mirror in the faint hope that I might someday return, and we could reconcile and finally have the closeness of true friendship you always wanted us to have. You never gave up on me.

It took me reaching my absolute nadir and then meeting some amazing beings in this world, one in particular, who saw me at my worst and lowest yet were still willing to give me a chance, to allow me the time and opportunity to rebound from my many failures and finally discover myself, that I understood your mood.

However, I’m not like you, Caddy. I’m certainly not like Twilight. I’m imperfect. I committed grievous sins both in Equestria and in this world, and I don’t believe they can ever be washed away, no matter how hard I try. Some scars just don’t heal. Most individuals are not so quick to forgive or forget.

I was wrong. About everything. Especially myself. I thought I would be fine going it alone. It was a disaster. Whether in Equestria or in this bizarre universe, I masked my uncertainty and inferiority within a cover of spikes and false pride.

I let you down. I let Princess Celestia down. I let myself down. No apology of mine deserves acceptance. Without deeds, words are meaningless.

The only thing I can do is move on and try to be my better self that you saw in me, that Princess Celestia must have seen in me when She rescued me from Stalliongrad as a filly. Maybe then I might be worthy enough to request forgiveness.

It’s ironic; I never realized how much I missed Equestria until I made friends here and suddenly felt forced to choose. I hope to return someday soon, even though I’m terrified to do so. I assume I am likely to be arrested, banished, and probably jailed if I come. Still, a grown mare should accept any punishment due her. Before that inevitability, I would want to see you and the Princess one last time, perhaps even meet Princess Luna now that she has returned.

Well, this letter has been more rambling than I expected. Sorry about that. If Princess Celestia happens to learn of this entry, I want her to know one thing:

I’m sorry You wasted Your time on this unworthy filly. It took seventeen years for me to understand what You were trying to teach, but I think I finally get it now. Not only can friendship be literal magic (as I learned the hard, direct way), it also carries a more powerful metaphorical magic that can bring even the most-lost back from the brink and save lives, if she who is astray is willing to open herself up and let others in.

Even though I was a complete and total failure as Your student, there is no amount of gratitude sufficient enough for me to thank You for raising me and attempting to guide me on the right path.

That’s all. Caddy, I would rather Twilight not learn about this entry’s contents, okay? She can be extremely nosy, so the less she knows about my past, the better. This is my fight. I hope someday soon I will be brave enough to face Equestria. And you. And Her.

In Friendship and Harmony,
--Sunset Shimmer

PS: Caddy, last time I returned, I got a nice tour of your castle courtesy of your personal guard. Don’t fire him; it’s not his fault I once dated his doppelgänger in this world so I knew how to manipulate him into giving me information.

Princess Celestia lowered the diary.

“That’s it?” asked Cadance.

“That’s it,” Celestia confirmed.

Cadance sighed, sadly. “Oh, Sunny… Sounds like she’s been through a lot. So, Should I write her back? What should I say? Tell her I miss her too and would love to see her and be friends?”

“No,” Princess Celestia said. “I will handle this matter personally.”

“You do remember the reason I ‘requisitioned’ the Magic Mirror in the first place was so you wouldn’t do that, right?” Cadance said, her voice uncharacteristically severe.

Celestia nodded. “Time stops for no mare. All is ever-changing. Scars may never go away, but they can sometimes heal enough and fade enough that they cease to stand out amongst the vast tapestry of ourselves. In extraordinary circumstances, a pony can change far beyond what one expects. We all learn and grow throughout our lives, whether that life be a decade or multiple millennia.”

Cadance glared at the enigmatic princess opposite her. “Why do you always do this?”

“All right, fine,” said Celestia with a wry grin, rolling her eyes. “In plain language: Do not worry; I have got this.”

“I hope so…” Cadance replied, unconvinced.

“Cadance, one thing I learned many years ago is to never underestimate Sunset Shimmer. For worse or, thankfully now, for better, she will always find a way to surprise you and subvert your expectations,” concluded Celestia, a broad smile spreading across her face.

“Sunny…”

Comments

[ScisetShimmerEvan]

“Cadance, one thing I learned many years ago is to never underestimate Sunset Shimmer. For worse or, thankfully now, for better, she will always find a way to surprise you and subvert your expectations,” concluded Celestia, a broad smile spreading across her face.

It sure surprises me the the pony sunset was referring all along was really cadance and not celestia. I sure didn't see this one coming.