It Turns Out They're Windmills

by J Carp

Why Does the Sun Really Shine?

"Well," Moon Dancer said grumpily. "After all that, she's not even here."

Starlight frowned as they walked through the castle hallway. "This is weird. She wasn't here earlier, either. Where could she have gone? Where's Spike?"

"I don't know," Moon Dancer replied. "And I'm freaking out. Can we just make sure Fluttershy is all right first, please?"

Starlight waved her hoof dismissively. "Oh, fine, but the human dimension is totally safe. Sure, there's a little bit of evil magic here and there, and there's these giant machines called cars everywhere that go a hundred kilometers an hour and I have no clue how anyone uses them without dying, but..." she paused and squinted, "...what point was I trying to make again?"

Moon Dancer just grunted and began walking more quickly.

There was something a bit eerie about the library when they got there. It felt off, like a strange kind of electricity filled the air. Moon Dancer walked to the machine in the middle of the room and poked at it with her hoof. "I usually like horrific magic-technology chimeras," she said dryly, "but this one's leaving me cold, gotta say."

Starlight mumbled something. Moon Dancer cast a quick trigger spell on the mirror, which responded with a small, electric popping noise. She frowned. "How do you know this thing wouldn't turn Fluttershy into a dog, like it does to Spike?" she asked.

"I don't think Fluttershy is a dog," Starlight said idly.

"I wouldn't want to be a dog," Moon Dancer muttered. She finally turned away from the machine to see Starlight staring down into a book that lay open on a nearby table. "What you got there?"

Starlight looked up awkwardly. "Well, don't be worried, but I think I figured out where Twilight is."

Moon Dancer walked over and looked at the book, open to the most recent page:

SPECIAL URGENT MESSAGE SPECIFICALLY TO TWILIGHT SPARKLE AND NO ONE ELSE
twilight hello. we need you. just you, twilight sprkale. Fluttershy is very sad. only you can help her. Come to this world as soon as you can.
You have to come save her. You, Twilight sparkle.

"I'm pretty sure that means the human Fluttershy, not ours," Starlight said, failing to be reassuring. "I guess Sunset wanted more help, and Twilight knows all those humans already, so she'd be the one to ask." She walked to the mirror and took it in. "I guess we just have to wait for both of them, then."

She squinted in a mild pout. "'Only Twilight Sparkle.' I know human Fluttershy too, I could have helped..."

"Uh, Starlight," Moon Dancer interrupted, giving her friend a dry but worried look. "Sunset Shimmer did not write this."

"What?" Starlight walked closer. "How do you know?"

"Because look at it," Moon Dancer said, poking at the book derisively with her magic. "This was not written by the second-smartest non-Celestia pony Twilight has ever met." She flipped back a random set of pages. "See? Look at this one. The mouthwriting is really good, and look at the words she uses. 'Concordance.' 'Serendipitous.' This idiot here..." and flipped back to the most recent message, "...can't even spell 'sparkle' right."

Starlight leaned in. "...Are you sure?"

"Trust me. If there's one thing I know, it's authorial voices. Here, cast a magic identification spell if you don't believe me. Sunset used to be a unicorn, right? She should still have a hoofprint."

Starlight glanced at her skeptically, but she cast the spell. A jagged, holographic shape appeared over the well-written journal entry, spinning lazily.

"Okay, now do this one." Moon Dancer opened to the newest entry. Starlight cast the spell again. They waited. Nothing happened.

"See?" Moon Dancer said, her mind beginning to race faster than she could keep up. "Not magic at all."

Starlight began to visibly sweat. She walked nervously in place. "So... this is bad, right? This is really bad. This is really very bad."

Moon Dancer looked back at the book, flipping back through the pages one by one. "Not Sunset... not Sunset... Sunset... not Sunset..." She found herself pausing on a particular written conversation between Twilight and this mystery human. She almost lost her intellectualization, but with a mighty effort, she flipped away from the page and kept analyzing the book.

Starlight seemed closer to panic. "So, some human stole Sunset's journal and used it to trick us, specifically to lure Twilight over there. But why? Why Twilight?"

"I don't think they stole it," Moon Dancer said, indicating the book with a nod of her head. "Sunset's messages are interspersed with the other human's throughout the past week or so. So unless they kept stealing it and giving it back..." She trailed off and walked over to a nearby bookshelf labeled 'History: Magical Artifacts and Charms', examining it closely.

"What are you doing?" Starlight yelped anxiously. "This isn't the time for books, Moon Dancer! We have to figure out what happened with the books!"

Moon Dancer ignored her and reached out mentally with her magic. She scanned each book on the shelf until she found her target. "Aha!" She popped her eyes open and grabbed the book she wanted with aplomb. Neighboring books flew off the shelf and scattered into the room, which felt like a celebration. "Puppy Breath!"

Starlight looked at her with complete bemusement. "...Puppy?"

"Emperor Puppy Breath!" Moon Dancer said excitedly, opening the book to the correct page and shoving it into her friend's surprised face. "The tyrant of the pegasi during the Quill Dynasty?" She looked with expectation at Starlight. "Usurped the throne from Blueberry Yum-Yum?" Starlight looked back at her blankly.

Moon Dancer sighed. "Okay, sorry, I shouldn't assume everypony has the same interests as me. Uh, briefly: We don't know much about the era, but Puppy Breath is probably the most famous figure. He lived in the palace as an adviser or a servant... we're actually not sure. But he was a genius: he was an expert at harnessing his pegasus magic in unorthodox ways. He used his power to enchant two magic items, the Two Treasures of Puppy Breath, which he used to slowly turn the court against Blueberry Yum-Yum."

".....Puppy?"

"Mad Emperor Puppy Breath, yes," Moon Dancer said quickly. "Listen, the point is, one of his treasures was something called the Leaf of Redaction. It's... well, we don't know what it was, exactly, but he used it to intercept and alter magical messages. Just like these journals!" She poked at the journal in triumph, knocking it off the table. She did not care. "That's the only way I know that a non-unicorn could do something like this."

Starlight took a deep breath, squinting as she took in Moon Dancer's theory. "So you think this magical Equestrian artifact somehow ended up in the human dimension and was recently rediscovered and is now being used against Sunset and her friends? How would that..." She trailed off, then rolled her eyes. "Actually never mind, that's a stupid question. This happens all the time."

"Yes, but." Moon Dancer paced worriedly. "I still don't understand why Twilight. I don't like it at all." She looked up, squinting in thought. "Puppy Breath's other treasure was something called The Fervent Teapot. We know less about that, but somehow it affected ponies' emotions." She grabbed another book off another shelf, flinging nearby tomes through the room, and began leafing through the pages. "Aha. Yes, as I thought, teapots can't be enchanted very effectively, because their shape minimizes the cohesion of the tichner particles in the molecular structure." She snapped the book shut and tossed it over her shoulder. "Oh, but you're a magic expert, you should know all that."

Starlight blinked. "Um... I'm still trying to come to terms with the ancient tyrant named Puppy Breath."

"His reign of terror lasted decades," Moon Dancer replied. "Slaughtered his own people." She started to pace again. "It's possible this mystery human has both treasures. The teapot probably couldn't affect Twilight much normally, but... if she's brittle..." Moon Dancer frowned and hung her head slightly. "They'd all be in danger because of what I did."

Starlight nodded, her face beginning to fill with determination. "This is a big deal. All right. You need to go find Spike and send a message to the princesses. I'll go over to the human dimension and see what's going on."

She started for the portal, but Moon Dancer suddenly felt herself fill up with a strange, unfamiliar energy; it was almost worry and almost heedless, gleeful abandon. She looked up and said, richly and sharply, "No."

Starlight froze mid-stride and looked back, confused. "No?"

"I'm going."

Starlight shook her head, seeming almost offended. "What? I'm the one who's been over there before. I should..."

"Starlight." Moon Dancer gazed at her new friend with intensity. "Fluttershy is in there. I'm going."

Starlight scrunched up her face like a stress ball, but then she just sighed. "Standing upright is hard at first, but it works better if you try not to think about it too much."

Moon Dancer nodded. "I'm terrible at that, but I'll try."

Starlight smiled wanly but genuinely. "We'll come after you soon. Keep us updated with the journal if you can."

Moon Dancer nodded, and Starlight turned to leave. But Moon Dancer felt an urge to share a last message of gratitude and encouragement, even though she did not know what to say. So she called out, "Starlight!"

Starlight looked back and so Moon Dancer was obligated to say something else, so she added, "Don't make out with Trixie!"

Moon Dancer literally smacked herself in the head with a hoof, which she had not thought was a thing ponies actually did, but here she was doing it. Starlight froze, then turned around. "...What?"

Moon Dancer's head was swimming. "Um. To find out if you're attracted to mares. She'd probably go along with it, but you guys are too close. It'd be a mess."

"What are you talking about?!" Starlight shrieked.

"I don't know! It was just in my head and I opened my mouth and said it!"

"Moon Dancer!" Starlight looked extremely embarrassed. "This is a crisis, and you go and make things all uncomfortable?!"

"Aaa!" Moon Dancer wailed. "I'm sorry!"

Starlight paused. "....Would it really be bad?"

"It'd be a terrible idea!"

Starlight stomped her hoof. "Now I feel all weird!"

"Gyaaagh!" Moon Dancer looked around frantically, her gaze focusing on the mirror. "I'll just go!"

"Yes, just go!"

She squeezed her eyes shut and flung herself into another dimension.

---

Othershy sat, fiddling anxiously with her hands. She had been led to an absolutely enormous bookstore: calm lighting and soft carpets and rows and rows of shelves, and plopped down on a bench in a quiet alcove near the back and left alone. After a minute, Fluttershy returned with a paper cup of hot, green tea.

"I assumed you like it, too," Fluttershy said. Othersy nodded, holding the mug and breathing in the grassy, flowery scent.

"I come here sometimes when I'm worried," Fluttershy said softly, sitting down next to her counterpart. "It's nice and quiet, and I can find any book I want." She tilted her head to a nearby bookcase. "And the animal section is here. There's a book that shows all the different dog breeds, with big, pretty pictures. Sometimes I just like looking through that."

Othershy found herself smiling at the idea. "Oh, that's nice. We don't have big places like this in my world, but we do have libraries." There was a pause; she grew slightly awkward. "Thank you very much for the tea," she added, fidgeting.

"You're welcome." Fluttershy replied. She looked at Othershy with intense earnestness. "Do you want to tell me why you were upset?"

"Oh. Um." To delay, Othershy raised the tea to her mouth, but it was still far too hot to drink, so she had to give up. Out of options, she answered: "It's just... well, I'm kind of fighting with my Twilight right now."

"Oh no!" Fluttershy gasped, looking truly stunned. "A bad fight?"

"Not... really, but..." Othershy looked down at her hands, which were trembling as she held her mug of tea. "What was that word you used before? When you're dating a human girl?"

"Girlfriend?"

"Oh, yes." Othershy sighed. "I just... when I saw the human Twilight, I suddenly realized, um, Twilight and my girlfriend look a whole lot alike. Like... a whole lot. I knew they looked similar, but when I saw her a minute ago, um. For a second, I couldn't tell who was who." As she spoke, her voice decreased in volume until she was nearly whispering.

Luckily, Fluttershy knew what it was like to be soft-spoken. "Ohh. But... why is that bad?"

"I really love my girlfriend," Othershy explained. "And I'm really... a--attracted to her. But if she looks just like Twilight, does that mean... I'm attracted to Twilight too?"

Fluttershy blinked and began fidgeting too. "What would be wrong with that?"

"I don't know, but it would be."

"But... didn't you just tell me it was okay to be attracted to my friends?" Fluttershy stood and then immediately sat back down.

"It is!" Othershy said quickly.

"But... then why isn't it okay for you to be?"

"I..." Othershy set her tea down so she could more effectively play anxiously with her hair and skirt. "Just, what if I was always really attracted to Twilight and didn't know it? What if the only reason I like my girlfriend is that she looks like Twilight?"

"Is that true?"

"...I don't know."

"Oh no," Othershy murmured. "I hadn't even thought about this. What if I think I have a crush on... um, who I have a crush on, but actually deep down I like someone totally different? Would I never know?"

Fluttershy threw her arms around her doppelganger in fear and worry. "Oh dear," she said.

Othershy returned the gesture. "Oh dear," she also said. They fretted.

"Hey!" a voice called to them from across the alcove.

They looked. A girl stood near the bookcase of the animal section, perusing the books with her back to them. "Look, uh, I don't want to interrupt this little twin crisis here," she said without turning around, "but some of us are trying to use this bookstore as an actual bookstore." The girl ran a hand over the book titles, her ratty, black sweater sleeve sliding a bit down her yellow-white arm. "Could you please try to be a little quieter?"

Othershy was utterly stunned, so it was up to Fluttershy to provide their habitual response to such situations: "Oh, I'm sorry!"

The girl sighed and finally turned around. She poked her glasses higher up her nose. "Look, I'm sorry, too. I didn't mean to be rude, I'm just trying to find a really important book. It's a pretty high-pressure situation."

Othershy finally found her voice. "Moon Dancer?" she croaked.

"Um, yes?" The human Moon Dancer raised a thick eyebrow. "Do I know you? Actually, you guys do look kind of familiar somehow..."

Othershy stared back at her, then quickly said, "I volunteer at the library? I've seen you there."

"Ah." Human Dancer seemed to find this explanation sufficient. "Anyway, look, you shouldn't worry, okay? You can't be attracted to a friend and somehow 'not know it,' that doesn't exist."

Othershy noticed that her doppelganger had clearly put together the identity of Moon Dancer's pony counterpart and was too dumbstruck to be of any use in a conversation. "Oh," Othershy replied. "Um, but..."

"Gaugh." Human Dancer rolled her eyes and walked right up to them, staring Othershy right in the face. "Look, it's just basic human psychology. You know this Twilight person really well, right? And you know your girlfriend really well, too?"

Othershy noticed she was immensely turned on by what was happening, which, as someone that spent a lot of time with non-pony critters, was quite disturbing. "Y...yes."

"So you'd be the least likely to mix them up." Human Dancer nodded smartly. "It's just assimilation and contrast! They're similar, but you know them well, so you'll contrast them. You'll notice all the ways they're different." She looked back and forth between them, paused slightly, then looked away with a mild blush. "I mean, you guys are twins, you should get this all the time, right?"

Almost automatically, Othershy nodded. Human Dancer gave a very familiar proud grin. "I know my psych. Lucky you ran into me!" The grin changed to a surprisingly unfamiliar smirk. "Don't know anyone as lucky as whoever your girlfriend is, though. Give me a call if you break up."

Othershy gaped. Was this actually happening? Was a monkey version of her special somepony seriously trying to pick her up? And was she actually being kind of... in her dorky way... smooth?

And then suddenly, it all clicked. This was not her Moon Dancer. This was not a sea lion; this was some kind of flirty, nerdy octopus. "I think... I think I understand what you've been saying," she said, giving a warm smile. "I feel a lot better. Thank you."

Human Dancer adjusted her glasses. She turned back around and returned to the bookshelf, scanning over the books.

Fluttershy gaped at her counterpart. She pointed exaggeratedly at Human Dancer and made a heart symbol with her hands, a quizzical expression on her face. Othershy nodded.

Fluttershy mouthed, "She is so cute!" Othershy blushed but felt herself smiling and nodding again.

She walked closer to Human Dancer, clasping her hands behind her back. "What's the book you're looking for?" she asked.

Human Dancer did not turn around, but she held up a stern finger. "You gotta promise not to tell anyone! Both of you!"

They shared a look, then Othershy said, "All right, we promise."

Human Dancer turned around, grinning. "It's the new biography of Good Doll. The zoologist? It's not even officially released yet!" She giggled. "I can't believe it; I've been waiting for this book for a YEAR!"

"Oh..." There was something comfortable and familiar about Human Dancer's book-enthusiasm, but this was still confusing to Othershy. "Um. If it isn't released, then why are you looking for it?"

"Special promotion!" Moon Dancer replied, idly adjusting her hair clip. "The publishing company sneaked one copy of the book into selected stores in the middle of the night. The employees don't even know!"

Fluttershy walked up to stand next to her counterpart, a perplexed expression on her face. "That's... strange," she said hesitantly. "I've never heard of anything like that." Human Dancer just shrugged and continued scanning the book titles, so Fluttershy added, "How did you hear about it?"

Human Dancer turned to them with a sneaky glint in her eye. "Anonymous tip. I got a text a few minutes ago telling me about the promotion, and that this store was chosen."

The Fluttershies shared a nervous moment. "Um," Othershy said, "why would you get an anonymous tip?"

Human Dancer paused, then rubbed her chin in thought. "Hm. I just assumed my interest in the history of primatology had become well-known, but now that you mention it, it is a little weird. Who would..."

A boisterous, hacking noise interrupted her. It was a sound Othershy had never heard before, but she still interpreted it immediately and correctly: it was the sound of someone who had no natural inclination to sinisterly laugh attempting to affect a sinister laugh. It actually sounded like "Mwah ha ha."

She turned to see a very strange sight: a funny-looking, bespectaled boy with frizzy hair and a manic grin standing on top of one of the bookshelves in the center of the store. He held a clenched fist in front of his face in a pose that someone, somewhere, might possibly think looks cool, maybe.

"Weeping Willow?!" Fluttershy and Human Dancer both bellowed at exactly the same moment. Othershy gaped in shock: this was the famous Weeping Willow? A new wave of pity for her human counterpart washed over her.

Weeping Willow cast his gaze over to them. "Aha!" he barked. "I see everyone's in attendance!" An employee of the store began shouting at him to get down, but Weeping ignored her entirely.

"Let's get this party started!" he shouted, still trying much, much too hard. He threw his hands into the air. Nothing happened for a moment, but then the rumbling began.

---

"Okay," Applejack said, nodding her head smartly and putting her hands on her hips. "I thought of one."

"Is it edible?" Sunset asked, without looking at her.

Applejack frowned. "Yes. It is."

"Is it an apple?"

Applejack's mouth fell open. "You're right! How'd you get it so fast?"

Sunset rolled her eyes. "I'm lucky."

Pinkie cheered. "Sunset's great at twenty questions! But I bet you won't guess what I'm thinking of!"

Sunset smiled lightly; unlike Rainbow Dash's "soccer ball" and Rarity's "fashion," this had a much higher likelihood of being surprising. "Okay, Pinkie. Is it a person?"

"Yes!" Pinkie paused, then scrunched up her face in thought. "Actually.... nnnnno. Wellllll...."

Sunset blinked. Pinkie was not disappointing her. "Is it... kind of a person?"

"No, it's definitely a person! Or not a person. I mean, what's a 'person,' when you think about it?"

Sunset blinked. "...is it pony Fluttershy?"

"Nope!"

"Is it pony Pinkie Pie?"

"It's not a pony." Pinkie scratched her head. "Actually... I mean... it is, in the sense that everything is a pony?"

Sunset stared at her for a moment. "This is more abstract than I thought it would be," she said.

"I'm really good at games, Sunset," Pinkie replied very seriously.

Sunset grinned, relishing the challenge. Unfortunately, before she could ask another question, she was distracted by a wordless squawk, which sounded like an ostrich getting punched in the stomach. They looked to the source of the noise and saw, lurching very unsteadily towards them, a disheveled girl with large, black glasses.

"You!" the girl shouted. "Friend-monsters! I found you!" She ran closer, waving her hand in the air. "You!" Sunset glanced at her friends, who, with the notable exception of Pinkie (always delighted to make a new friend) were seemed as confused as she was.

The girl reached them and hunched over, resting her hands on her knees, panting heavily. She made some grunts that were probably attempts at words, but she was clearly too out of breath to speak.

"Are... you all right?" Sunset asked, genuine concern beginning to override her bemusement.

"Yes!" the girl wheezed. "I! You!" She suddenly reached forward, but her legs tangled and she fell over sideways with a yelp.

"Whoa, hey!" Rainbow yelped, rushing to the girl and catching her before she collapsed to the ground. "Are you sick or something?"

"My head!" the girl wailed. "My head is so big! So biiiiggggg! How do you live this way??"

They all shared a nervous look, but Sunset found herself striding forward and grabbing the girl solidly but gently by the shoulders as she stayed draped in Rainbow's arms. "Hey," she said, capturing the girl's gaze and holding it. "Everything's cool. Breathe with me." The girl's look was wild, but she gave a tiny nod and hitchingly tried to slow her breathing.

"You're freaking out, but it's okay," Sunset said. "It's gonna happen, but then it's gonna pass. Okay?" The girl nodded again. They breathed together, slowly, and finally the girl closed her eyes and relaxed. Then she almost fell over again, but Rainbow caught her.

Sunset crossed her arms across her stomach and regarded the girl gently. "They taught us how to help with panic attacks when I took a first aid class, and I think that's what you were starting to have."

The girl tittered nervously, stepping out of Rainbow's arms and adjusting her glasses. "That was new. But so is having a giant, round head, so hooray for novel experiences." She suddenly noticed Twilight, and she leaned forward in alarm. "Twilight, is that you?! Do you hate me??"

Twilight touched her hand to her chest in confusion. "No?"

The girl slumped. "Oh. Then you're not who I'm looking for."

Rainbow frowned. "Okay, really, what is going on? Who are you?"

The girl sighed. "I'm sorry about my... freak-out, this is all very strange for me." She composed herself and gave what appeared to be an attempt at a friendly smile to the whole group. "Hi," she said. "I'm Moon Dancer." There was a long pause. "I'm a horse," she clarified.

Pinkie's gasp was louder than most people's high-pitched screams. "You're Fluttershy's girlfriend!" she yelped, eliciting a timid nod from the erstwhile pony.

"Oh, my," Rarity muttered, eyeing Moon Dancer up and down. "Well, you certainly are pretty enough, but you're not very... put together, are you? I do hope you put effort into cleaning yourself up when you go on dates with Fluttershy."

"I do!" Moon Dancer barked, face reddening. "Besides, Fluttershy says she thinks it's cute how I'm all rumpled."

Rarity frowned and then turned away. With her eyes closed, she said, "Well, I suppose that's what's most important."

"You look a lot like Twilight!" Pinkie said cheerily. She gasped again and grabbed her head. "Oh! I bet you're best friends with Twilight, aren't you??"

Moon Dancer's face darkened like a coffin closing shut. "Yes," she replied, loathing dripping from her voice. "We're best friends."

Pinkie did not even notice the change in mood. She bounced over to the human Twilight. "We have to find the human version so you guys can be best friends! And she can date Fluttershy and every year today will be Moon Dancer Day!"

"She's not dating Fluttershy just because they're together as ponies," Rarity sniffed. "And unless she dresses better," she added with a mumble that Sunset hoped Moon Dancer could not hear.

"Girls!" Applejack thankfully interjected. "We got ponies coming through the portal like cats after spilled milk. Something's gotta be going on."

"Yes, it is" Moon Dancer said, looking nervous. "Um, maybe weird question, but you guys haven't seen the other Twilight Sparkle around anywhere today, have you? The pony, I mean."

They all shook their heads. "Did she come through here?" Sunset asked, frowning.

"Yes," Moon Dancer answered, then frowned. "It's... um. How do I explain this?" She thought for a moment then snapped her fingers. "Aha!"

She froze, then looked down at her hand in wonder. "It made a sound," she marveled.

"Uh, Moon Dancer?"

"Oh! Yes." Moon Dancer looked at Sunset. "Do you have your magic journal? Could I see it?"

Sunset reached around to the backpack she was wearing, slung it off, and unzipped it. "Sure, but Twilight didn't tell me she was coming. I haven't gotten any messages in a few days, actually." She reached into the bag and handed over the book.

Moon Dancer took the book, held it over the ground, and opened the covers wide, the pages flapping in the air below. A green oak leaf drifted out of the book to the ground along with a small piece of torn paper. "Huh," she said, "it really is a leaf."

Sunset bent to pick it up, but Moon Dancer shrieked, "Don't touch it!" She jumped to all fours, nearly causing her glasses to fall off, and inspected the leaf closely. "It's a magic relic! It's literally a piece of history!"

She stared intently at the leaf, doing nothing. The leaf did nothing back.

Moon Dancer blinked, then looked up with irriatation. "I keep forgetting I don't have magic. Go ahead and touch it."

Sunset picked up the leaf and felt a slight, familiar tingle. "Yeah, you're right, it is Equestrian magic," she said. "What is this? How did you know it was in there?"

"The Leaf of Retraction," Moon Dancer replied. "It lets you... oh!" The journal had started to glow, and she handed it over to Sunset. "It lets you intercept magic messages. See? Someone else slipped that in there and then they could write messages in your place."

Sunset gaped as the impostor's distractingly poorly written messages began appearing in the journal. "Someone... hacked my magic journal?!"

"I don't know what that means," Moon Dancer answered, "but sure." She pointed down at the small piece of paper on the ground. "I suspect the perpetrator tore that out of another book, which was then magically connected to your journal through the leaf. They could just write in their own book, and it'd show up for Twilight."

"Weeping Willow," Rainbow said quetly. They all looked at her, and her eyes burned with rage. "Weeping Willow and his stupid notebook."

"Weeping Willow?" Moon Dancer asked, scratching the back of her head in confusion.

"It's Fluttershy's boyfriend," Sunset explained, then turned to her other friends. "But come on, when would he get this leaf in there?" Before she was even done with the question, the memory suddenly struck her. Making her so angry she had to close her eyes and count to five. Kneeling over her book, looking up with scorn, the suddenly ironic comment, "You're not cool just because you have magic stuff."

"I know exactly when he put the leaf in there," Sunset said icily.

"Should we even worry about this?" Rainbow said, putting her hands on her hips. "Come on, he's obnoxious and terrible, but he's not a supervillain."

"We kinda meet a lot of obnoxious people who turn out to be supervillains," Applejack pointed out. Then, at Twilight and Sunset's hurt looks, she added, "Now, all I'm saying is, people change. Good people used to be supervillains, and supervillains used to be jackasses."

Moon Dancer gasped. "Applejack! I can't believe you just used that word!" She paused, then shrunk slightly in embarrassment at their confused looks. "Oh, wait, right, I guess that's not racist here."

"It's not," Sunset said. "Neither is 'nanny goat.' Took me a while to get used to, too."

"Wait," Twilight said, holding up a hand. "You're not... all... ponies over there? Some of you are donkeys and..." She shook her head quickly. "Wait, okay, not the time." She pointed at the historical relic in Sunset's hand. "Can that leaf do anything else?"

"I don't think so," Moon Dancer said.

"So, we're safe, then?" Rainbow asked. "We get to pony up and go save Twilight?" She froze. "Oh man, how am I gonna do this without hurting him too badly?"

"There's one more thing," Moon Dancer said. "There's another relic that might be out there, an enchanted teapot. The records say it could affect ponies' emotions, but it couldn't have been too powerful. Twilight might be under its sway, but it shouldn't be hard to break her out of it."

Rarity frowned in thought. "Emotions..." she mused. "Goodness, what if that teapot has been affecting Fluttershy?"

Sunset frowned back at her. "Or us," she said darkly.

Moon Dancer shook her head briskly. "No, I really think it's not that powerful! Maybe, someone who's emotionally sensitive would change, but it would take a lot." She thought, too. "Although. My Fluttershy did once start crying when she saw a cricket fall off a blade of grass, so I guess it's not too unlikely, is it?" She shrugged. "Anyway, the point is, you'll be fine. The teapot can't do much."

Exactly the same instant as she finished speaking, there was a deep, booming sound that came from several blocks away. They looked just in time to see a dome of chartreuse light begin to expand out from the source of the noise. The dome grew larger and larger, encompassing buildings and streets and cars until finally it swept upon them, whooshing past with a rasping roar.

Sunset had squeezed her eyes shut when the dome was approaching, but now she opened them and glanced down at her perfectly intact and normal-looking body. She glanced in relief and confusion to the others, but only Moon Dancer looked back at her.

Her friends were lying prostrate on the cement.

"Girls!" Sunset rushed to the closest, Rainbow Dash, and turned her over to look in her face. Rainbow stared up at the sky, an expression of utter despair on her face.

Sunset looked over at her friends, who were all similarly afflicted. Soft sobs came from Rarity, and Applejack let out a moan. Sunset looked up and saw pedestrians all around, everyone who had been out enjoying this warm, sunny day, just crumpled on the sidewalk. A car slowly came to a stop in the middle of the road, right in front of her. The driver leaned over his steering wheel, crying.

"Okay, you know what I think happened?" Moon Dancer said, holding up her index finger. "In Ancient Equestrian, the word for 'teapot' is only one vowel away from the word for 'device of ultimate power.' So..."

"Are they all right?!" Sunset barked. "It's just emotional? They're... really sad?"

"Chartreuse is the color of despair," Moon Dancer confirmed. "It must not work on ponies, for some reason. Odd."

Sunset looked down at her friends, frantically willing both her natural and magical empathy from being overwhelmed by their misery. "Girls, don't worry," she said. "I'll go get Weeping and fix this, I promise." She stood and fixed Moon Dancer with her best Leader Of A Superhero Team expression. "I'll need your help!"

"I'm kind of useless!" Moon Dancer enthused.

"We all are," Sunset replied, "but not when we gotta help our friends."

Moon Dancer nodded back to her with something close to faintly approaching determination. Sunset turned and ran off toward the source of the chartreuse explosion, Moon Dancer lurching clumsily behind her.

Author's Note:

That thesis has been rendered invalid.

Comments

[livinthelife]

"I'm kind of useless!" Moon Dancer enthused.

Beautiful.

[Darkstarling]

Obviously it was designed as a weapon against non-ponies, so you could sweep an area and leave your people fine.

Speaking of which, Othershy is fine. I'd feel sorry for Weeping Willow BUT...

You know, this revelation about ancient equestrain puts Celestia's tea fondness in a new and disturbing light :p

The banter in this one is hilarious.

[Texus]

Hhhhmm I had a good story with Starlight x Trixie.

I forgot which shy is which shy, but why does Moon dancer suddenly act like that when I think we had a scene in which she was totally in love with human Fluttershy?

edit: I can't say if I like their reactions or feeling attracted to human Moondancer and all that stuff, since I don't really know who is who this time. We should have called them E.Shy and P.Shy or something like that.

FOr some reason I'M not always getting what they are saying in this chapter.
I didn't understand the scene in which Moon Dancer came out and met the equestria girls, to me it looked like she came out and told some random nonsense.

"I'm kind of useless!" Moon Dancer enthused.

"We all are," Sunset replied, "but not when we gotta help our friends."

As much as I hate it, now they are probably all flying into the air like superman/supergirl. While I somewhat like the first movie, I think i started to hate the fact/reason why they transform there.

Half of it was actually good so far, but I think I'm glad if the Equestria girls arc is over.

[J Carp]

9109678
I legit don't have much perspective on how confusing it gets for readers to call pony Fluttershy 'Othershy.' (I am much more confident 'Human Dancer' is clear.)

I absolutely refuse to give up some kind of overly cute wordplay, but if people find it confusing, I'll try to think of something else that works better.

[Texus]

9110277
Well as long as you could tell me again who is who, it would already be a bigger help. I just think it's easy to forget, at least it seems to be.

[nemryn]

🎵 The sun is set alight by Celestia's might
She conjures it with her magic
A glowing orb that's set in the firmament
To guide us through the waking day

[Natedogg2006]

"It made a sound".
Every human pony culture clash moment here was pure freaking gold.
The sudden magical artifact climax out of nowhere feels a little forced, but I'll reserve judgement, especially since you've established that you've been building up to this subtlety. Really hope you don't go for the redemption thing with him. I've been hoping someone would deck him since you first described him.

[PresentPerfect]

I did not see that coming! :O

"Chartreuse is the color of despair," Moon Dancer confirmed.

I can't believe this was plot relevant.

[TCC56]

"Hi," she said. "I'm Moon Dancer." There was a long pause. "I'm a horse," she clarified.

I'm re-reading this for Pride and I just have to say: This is still one of the best lines of dialogue on the site.

[Dewdrops on the Grass]

I still like chartreuse.

[Venlinelle]

Starlight looked back and so Moon Dancer was obligated to say something else, so she added, "Don't make out with Trixie!"

Belay that order!