• Published 9th May 2018
  • 4,983 Views, 36 Comments

Beyond The Grave - Monochromatic



Only in death do we value what we love most. Rarity would gladly tell you so considering she did die and all.

  • ...
9
 36
 4,983

Obituaries, darling, obituaries.

Beyond The Grave

Twilight Sparkle.

How does… How does one describe Twilight Sparkle? How can one truly and sincerely hope to capture on paper a pony as interesting as she?

I never knew how to do so in life, and now in death, I still don’t. But I shall try.

I am dead, I should say. It admittedly slipped my mind to establish this rather vital fact, but if you have lived a life as long as mine, then you’ve learned a few things, including the fact that details hardly matter in the grand scheme of things. Details such as my death, or the fact that I am somehow communicating with you from beyond the grave. Were I Twilight Sparkle, these trivial things would matter.

But I am not.

And I digress.

Here is another fact, those silly little things that Twilight adored to embellish my life with.

Twilight Sparkle did not love me.

We met, we dated, and we were together up until the day I died, and as I sit—or write, more accurately—before you, I can sincerely say that Twilight Sparkle never loved me.

Twilight Sparkle accepted me.

Does that make sense? It sounds so off-putting, doesn’t it? Or, more than off-putting, it sounds wrong to say the love of my life merely accepted me into hers, but that’s how it was.

That’s how it would be because my dear darling lived too consumed by her thoughts to think otherwise.

I loved her. She accepted me. I was fine with that.


Death is a marvellously fascinating concept, is it not?

“But why?” I asked her once as we lay on our bed, my head rested on her barrel as she read a book. If I may confess, for in death what secrets are there to keep, I knew the answer myself, but I revelled in asking Twilight questions.

It made her happy.

Now, where was I?

“But why?” I asked, turning on my side, listening to the unbecoming sounds of her gurgling stomach. “Why is death so captivating?”

“Because we don’t know what happens after it,” she offered, turning a page of her book and continuing to read. “Nopony knows what comes after death.”

Well! I do now, and might I confess it is uneventful. The tea is delicious, but beyond that…

“Well,” I said, as I did when I wanted to be terribly smart and impress her, “I believe it is not death that fascinates us, but whether it will be meaningful.”

Her ears flicked. “I read in a book that what ponies fear the most when dying is to realize they didn’t have a meaningful life” she said, and she looked to me and offered a teasing smile. “Are you going through an existential crisis, Rarity?”

“Me? Never,” I replied, aghast. “Your mere presence prevents that.”

She laughed at this, and it was soft, and quiet, and intimate. To make her laugh was akin to being the main feature of Vanity Hooves’ yearly compendium.

“Because you love me?”

“Precisely.”


We had a lovely picnic that week.

Daisy sandwiches, two bottles of wine, the finest chocolate from Saddle Arabia, and just the two of us. I once again found myself resting my head on her barrel, her satisfied stomach no longer producing those awful sounds.

“Twilight,” I asked suddenly, “do you love me?”

She hesitated. I felt it in her body, in the breathing that stopped and allowed me a perfectly still view of the distant houses. She hesitated in saying she loved me, and it hurt, but not as much as I thought it would.

I already knew it, didn’t I?

“I don’t know,” she said finally, a shamed confession turned brave by the mere fact it had been voiced. “I mean, I do? I love you. Or I don’t know. It’s hard. I don’t want to be anywhere else, and when you left for a week for Manehattan, I missed you so much, but…”

The breeze moved through the trees, through my mane and through my coat. I breathed in and out, and finally I sat up.

“Ra-Rarity?” she asked, torn between lying down and sitting up. To sit up would mean that something was indeed wrong. Her ears lowered, and she asked me in a pained voice, “Why did you ask that?”

“I simply wanted you to say it,” I replied, my gaze set on some foals running around in the distance.

“W-What?”

I turned to her with a loving smile, and I leaned down to offer an even more loving kiss. Before she could question me, I nuzzled against her, leaving a kiss on her jaw before closing my eyes.

“I wanted you to say it,” I whispered, content in her arms, “so you would stop worrying that my love for you is conditional.”


Fate plays cruel tricks on us all, but it does, on occasion, make up for them.

Severe earthquakes, you see, are not very common in Ponyville, so nopony really expected Carousel Boutique to collapse with me still in it, least of all me when I woke up in the hospital with several broken bones and no recollection of the past day.

So it would seem that my tea time dates with Death were nothing more than some sort of coma dream? I’m rather unclear on that as well. I was a bit under the weather when the doctor was explaining. A side-effect of dying for a moment, I imagine.

“So?!” Rainbow Dash asked, shaking my hospital bed as Twilight quietly frowned at this. “Did you see anything?! You were, like, dead! What’s on the other side?!”

I blinked at her. “Darling, I really don’t remember.”

I was lying, of course. I thought of Twilight, even then.

“Uuuuuuugh!” she groaned, shaking her head. “Come on, Rares, if you’re gonna scare us like that, you could at least have a cool story out of it!”

I laughed. “You’re terribly right! How truly inconsiderate of me.”

“Rainbow,” said Twilight with severity. “Can you go out and see if the girls are here?”

“Huh? Oh, sure!” she replied, heading towards the door. “Do you want something from the candy bar, Rares?”

“No, she doesn’t,” Twilight sternly replied, and I was reminded of the absolutely dreadful tray of ‘food’ waiting for me on my bedstand.

It wasn’t until Rainbow Dash left, the door swinging to a close behind her, that Twilight and I were finally alone for the first time since my accident. She spoke first, quickly and methodically, explaining to me in immense detail my future accomodations in the castle until my boutique was rebuilt.

There was no sweeping gesture, no rushing into my forelegs to reassert a newly-discovered undying love, no bringing me flowers and kissing me until I fainted. Nothing like that, and instead just a plan of action for us living together that was detailed to the extreme.

Too detailed, in fact.

“Twilight,” I interrupted in the middle of her detailing our potential morning routine pending revisions and approval, “When did you—Did you come up with all of this while I was here? This is—”

“No,” she replied. “I’ve been planning for this since last year.”

“Last year? You’ve been planning this for over a year and didn’t tell me at all?” I gasped, and before I could stop myself, I said, “But, Twilight, I thought you didn’t know if you loved me.”

Finally, her eyes teared up and she regaled me with a small smile.

“I thought so too.”


Author's Note:

Back in 2016, I was in an accident where I was clinically dead for like 3 minutes, and ever since then, I think about death constantly. Not in a bad way, I just think about it. An odd fascination, I guess.

"All I know are sad songs, sad songs. Darling, all I know are sad songs, sad songs."

Comments ( 35 )

Almost cried in the middle of the band hall!! I would’ve had four directors and a friend over to me if I actually did. Excellent as always Mono. Well done.

Hmmm, unusual, but warmly welcome. This story does remind me of the sadder longer songs my mom and her sisters used to sing closer to the end of family gatherings. There is the same longing in the fic as there was in the songs.
Thanks for this story, Mono and for the memory that surfaced thanks to it.

Another canon!RariTwi for my collection. Far and few between these days, I'm afraid.

How are your tales always so entrancing Mono?

Did you see anything on the other side? There is another side, yes? Or was it just blackness?

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFantastic. Yes absolutely. As always, I never expect for you to tug at my heart strings with a story. Even after reading the description, I underestimated what kind of little ride you were about to take me on. I thoroughly enjoyed myself, that's no question. But in a very unique way. As someone who hates to think about death in any way, having it put like this made me pause a moment to think on myself.
Also FLUFFY RARITWI YAS :twilightsmile:

I have to know your secret Mono, how do you always write so fantastically?

8915326
I don't remember anything at all, much to the disappointment of the many people at the hospital who reeeaally were only interested in knowing if there was something rip

8915368
Seriously, you nearly die and everyone's just worried about the scouting you did for them... terribly rude. You'd think they'd know that even if there is something, integrating your soul's memories with a brain that wasn't really working at the time wouldn't be reliable. Assuming you'd even left yet. So many variables...

Anyway, I don't know you of course but I am glad you stuck around. Your stories have made my life brighter, including at times when I really needed it.

Fine! Take my heart apart and put it back together again. I don't mind... much.

Great read once again Mono. :raritywink:

Personally, I'd rather not know what's next until I get there. While I personally hope for a total lack of consciousness and awareness (meaning, of course, that I would never know I died) I think that ruining that mystery kinda takes the fun out of life. If we know there's an other side, then there's a second life. A second chance. That kinda makes the finality of our actions lose a little meaning, and love, friendship, all that stuff isn't quite as endgame. If I only have one life I can live with the satisfaction of knowing I'm accountable.

Sorry for the digression. This was a very sweet and short story, Mono, and one I look forward to revisiting in the future. Thanks for sharing it.

This is a terrific story and shows how theses two feel about each other far more than the words show us.

I loved it!

This was beautiful.

Although, I do have a question. Pardon my bluntness, but when you were “dead”, did you see anything? Was it just like being unconscious, or was it something else? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want. I’m just very curious. The story was really short, but also really powerful.

Nicely done as always. Have you read the golden a compass trilogy from Philip Pullman there is a race of people who live the physical embodiment of their own death. when asked about it the said that they found it comforting like an old friend. The deaths would help but around the house and stuff it was kindof a cool perspective.

KBB

I'm a simple man. I see a Monochromatic-writen Raritwi angst-fest, I read it.

Also, your brush with death sounds way more metal than mine, all I did was get kinda close to dying. Good job not dying friendo!

At the end, I note you say all songs are sad. That is very true. They all have a melancholy to them no matter how joyful. Because like life, all songs end.

8915368
Just want to say that im really glad your still with us.

8915715
yeah friend

my house flooded and i drowned trying to rescue my cats

also thank u it makes me very happy people enjoy my angst-fests

Awww this was so sweet I loved it! :raritystarry:

Another lovely Rarilight fic from the master of this pairing, and a very beautiful one at that. Your every story convinces me more and more that this is clearly MLP's OTP.

And I can totally see Twilight as someone on the Spectrum, and thus not quite sure about her emotions or what they mean due to how impossible it is to analyze them....and then how loosing Rarity makes it all so very clear.

I read it once, and really liked it.
I went back and read it a second time, and loved it.

Great job, Mono!

Ri2

8915352
Because she died for a few minutes and brought back divine talent, obviously.

Oh dear god, my heart. *Deep Breath* Alright let's just get this out of our system, shall we?

*An Even Larger Intake of Breath* YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!??!?!?!?!??!?!???!?!??!

Alright, I'm okay now. Good job Mono.:twilightsmile:

Ri2

8915445
Personally, I'm the opposite. I'm absolutely TERRIFIED of nonexistence. Everything I am, everything I was, just...gone. Like a candle snuffed out by the uncaring universe. And the even worse part is I'm not sure I can even really believe in God or the hereafter, which means a part of me is constantly aware that this is it and at any moment I'll just...disappear.

I don't want to die.

Lovely stuff, though some twisted part of me piped up near the end.

“No,” she replied. “I’ve been planning for this since last year.”

"And I'm going to have to have words with Starlight about that earthquake spell."

In any case, lovely vignette. Thank you for it.

8916581
Score one for Terror Management Theory!
That, according to some psychologists, Is the very struggle that makes us do stuff basically in order to achieve some sense of permanence.
Not wanting to die is a good thing. Long as you don't let fear of death interfere with living everything will work out.

So Rarity was dead, but not for long because MEDICINE! (you have to imagine the god-like, boisterous voice yourself). Interesting.

Death is considered, at least to me, as a temporary perspective, just like life. However Death is captivating due to us not having an exact description on what awaits us...Is it nothing but Darkness? Do we awake in another body with no memories of our previous life? Are we going to Ascend to the Heavens? Descend into Hell? Do we become roaming spirits? Who cares? Whatever is on the other side we will never be prepared for, and we just need to accept that.

Lovely story by the way, 11/10

8917776
Royal Canterlot Voice?

I also meet death for a bit i had cancer i was dying but here i am now alive and well and waiting to greet my old friend one day not in fear but in acceptance but that dosnt mean i wont fight him i will with everything i got

I am reading this while you are doing iron author. :twilightsmile:

I was prepared to read a depressing story and cry for a good but I was pleasantly surprised to find a happy ending! Sad, sweet and surprisingly positive, lovely story!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

glad it wasn't longer than 3 minutes, or we'd have fewer lovely stories to read :O

Login or register to comment