Amazement. Shock. Incredulity.
The English language totally fails to accurately portray the feeling you get when a character out of complete fiction steps out of nowhere and begins talking to you. Imagine if you suddenly were face to face with Santa Claus. Or an alien. Or Kermit the Frog, walking around and playing the banjo while singing “The Rainbow Connection”. Whatever you think your reaction is likely to be, it will probably be more like this:
First, you will stand there for a long moment, while your brain fizzes and pops. No coherent thoughts will surface. No words, no expressions come to mind. You are literally in complete idleness while your mind is locked up in an endless loop of denying the evidence that your senses stupidly insist on presenting.
Second, once your mind begins to get some traction, but before you have a chance to think you’re dreaming or hallucinating, you’ll make some incredibly odd and squeaky noises, while your language center tries to engage your voice with numb and fumbling fingers while simultaneously having nothing coherent to say.
Third, you’ll probably try to convince yourself that this can’t be happening, either by thinking it’s a dream or hallucination, as I mentioned above. There’s no shame in this, it’s a coping mechanism. Try to get through this quickly, though, because you’re missing the good parts.
Fourth, as the brain starts actually firing again, you’ll probably say something really stupid. My stupid thing to say was “You really exist?” Having found something that worked, even if poorly, your brain may decide to give it another shot, perhaps switching around the inflections, such as “You really exist?” and “You really exist?” and finally, as things start kicking into high gear, a full out exclamation, such as “You really exist!!”
At least, that’s how it happened for me. Your mileage may vary, depending on what suddenly non-fictional character you’re presented with, your mindset, and your ability to accept the ludicrously impossible.
The fifth thing that may happen, as happened to me, is that your brain decides that it needs whatever processing power it can grab, and decides to free up resources by cutting your control to your legs. I sat down hard. The good news was that I missed the fire pit. That would have been… uncomfortable, and would have likely ruined the rest of my night, magical pony Princesses or no. The bad news was that I also missed my lawn chair.
I did not, however, miss the sidewalk. I fell flat on my backside in front of the Princess (who, now that I know she exists, rates the capital “P” in in the title of “Princess”). Then, for an encore, I gaped at her like, I imagine, a rather surprised bass.
The Princess stepped forward with a look of concern on her face.
“Are you alright?” She asked me. After I managed to nod dumbly (honestly, I felt that fall for days afterward, but at the moment, I could have broken a limb and barely noticed) she continued on to say, “If you didn’t know that I existed, why did you invite me to visit you for an interview?”
An interview. Was that what I had written? I had spent hours on that dumb letter, and I couldn’t even remember what it said! Good lord, I asked the Princess-Goddess of all Equestria to come to my house in the middle of Minneapolis Minnesota… for an interview?!
What in the world was I thinking, wasting her time like this? But hot on the heels of this thought was the sheer amazement of “I get to interview Celestia!” while inside my mind my inner child bounced excitedly off of the walls and jumped up and down on my mental furniture.
“It’s… complicated,” I told her. I thought for a moment, and then blurted out awkwardly, “I was hoping you were real but I didn’t think you really were!” So, really not complicated at all, then.
The Princess stared at me for a moment, then laughed, gentle like a waterfall and infectious. It didn’t take long before I was laughing too.
I stood and, still somewhat numb from shock, managed a very shaky bow. “I’m honored that you came, Princess. Thank you.”
Celestia inclined her head slightly in acknowledgment. Then she stared at me. I was wondering why she was staring, when it suddenly occurred to me that she was likely staring at me because I had been staring at her first.
This may be a good time, with all that staring going on, for descriptions. I’ll avoid describing me, since you know what humans look like (we're downright dull). Instead, I’ll describe her. And if you think you know what Celestia looks like because you’ve seen her on the cartoon, then you’ve got another think coming.
The first thing to know is that the cartoon Celestia, while definitely being identifiable as Celestia, is still a cartoon. In other words, it looked as much like the real Celestia as a cartoon person looks like a real person.
The real Celestia was slightly shorter than I am, which is just an inch under six feet tall, unless you count the horn, which extended half a foot higher than my head. She was, very obviously, equine in nature. The artistic compromises of the show left out the details, such as the very real hair of her hide and the smooth muscling underneath it. However, I had seen horses before, and their hides looked nothing like this. Celestia gleamed white, perfectly groomed and not a hair out of place. Which, on a pony is saying something.
Saying that she was equine in nature, however, was like saying that a supermodel is really just a really a type of monkey. A regular, Earth horse or pony just doesn’t compare. Her features were much finer, much more mobile and expressive. Her eyes were larger, more expressive and far more intelligent than any horse I had ever seen (or human, for that matter). Her snout (muzzle? I really need to look up the anatomy terms!) was far shorter than the average horse. Her limbs seemed almost delicate at the same time that they had an undeniable power.
As for the mane and tail… Oh, yes, the mane and tail. I could stare at those for hours. Like in the show, they rippled in a non-existent wind. Unlike the show, the hairs of her mane and tail were individual and distinct. All the colors of the rainbow were represented, not just the turquoise, teal, lavender and pink that make up her mane in the show. The hair itself was rippling, and the colors changed along the hair as it did. The effect was joyful and serene at the same time. I had the feeling that the hair was dancing with a wind that I couldn’t feel. And the effect was hypnotic, in a way I can’t even begin to describe.
Her wings… Those defied description. Even gracefully folded along her sides, I could tell that they were considerably larger than in the show. The feathers were the same gleaming alabaster white as her coat, but with a mild pinkish tinge at the tips.
The horn, spiraling seamlessly from her forehead, was not plain white by any means, but had a sheen to it that reminded me of mother-of-pearl. Once again, all the colors of the rainbow, but shifting and subtle as it caught the light.
She was wearing none of the jewelry that you see in the show. Not the tiara, not the big necklace, and not those strange shoes. Which meant that I could see her actual hooves as well. They were surprisingly small and well formed, especially compared to an actual horse or pony hoof. And they shone as if polished, with the same rainbow gleam that her horn displayed.
And her cutie mark… “Cutie mark”, such an absurd thing to call it, when you see the real thing. The stylized sun in miniature very nearly blazed on Celestia’s flanks. It was indescribable. I’ll try anyway. It looked… it looked like the cutie mark was projecting through her, somehow more real, more… complete, though that’s not the right word… vivid works better but is still not right… it’s more vivid and alive than any tattoo or body paint could ever be. It gave the sense that the rays of the sun were in motion, even though they weren't.
Oh, and at this point, you may be wondering how I was able to see her so clearly when the sun was down and the only nearby light source was from a dying fire. That’s simple. That fire wasn’t the nearest light source. The nearest was Celestia herself. She shone like a beacon in the advancing night. And I was suddenly very aware of how conspicuous she was.
It was time to take this party indoors, in other words, and I was incredibly grateful for the tall privacy fence around our tiny backyard.
“Ah… Princess,” I said finally, breaking the long moment of silence, “Perhaps we should move indoors? My neighbors might get curious, and it’s going to get chilly now that the sun is down.”
I noticed Celestia stare briefly off to the west, a look of concentration on her face. She blinked suddenly and looked surprised. I filed that away as a question to ask later, however, as she said, “I agree. If you don’t mind letting me into your home, I would be glad to accompany you.”
As I led Celestia through the backdoor and into my house, I suddenly had to get a firm grip on myself to stop myself from laughing uncontrollably. See, my wife insists that casual guests remove their shoes before entering the house. I wasn’t sure if Celestia wore shoes or not. While she wasn’t wearing any of the regalia you see in the show, I certainly wasn’t about to ask her if she was wearing horseshoes. And even if she were, I’d happily accept any scolding my wife could dish out for our scuffed up hardwood floors.
Once inside, however, I found myself completely at a loss for what to say. To have the actual Princess Celestia inside my actual house made things even more surreal for me. I felt a moment of dizziness pass over me and had just enough time to wonder if I was going to black out, when Celestia spoke.
“Oh, my!” she said, “What a charming home you have!”
Somehow, that statement grounded me again, and I was able to focus. Old habits, after all, die hard. And now I had a guest in my house. A magical, equestrian guest, perhaps, but a guest nonetheless. My host reflexes, trained into me over a period of years by my wife, kicked in, much to my relief. I now knew exactly how to act.
“Why, thank you Princess! You are too kind. Please, allow me to show you in!”
With that, I took her quickly through the kitchen (where the back door was located) and showed Celestia a few of our appliances, which seemed to fascinate her. Perhaps they don’t have microwaves and refrigerators in Equestria? Or perhaps, being a Princess, she never had much call to be in a kitchen? I may never know.
After that, we toured quickly through the dining room, where Celestia stopped to look interestedly into the built-in hutch that held my wife’s grandmothers antique China dishes. I briefly mentioned that the built-ins had been included with the original design of the house, but we had to restore them after a previous owner had painted over them. The glass was new, and the woodwork newly stained, which looked much better. I also commented on how the house was over a century old (belatedly realizing that a presumably immortal Princess would likely be less than impressed by that fact, and yet I soldiered on!)
It was when we reached the living area that I realized that there might be a problem. That realization came just as I was saying the following phrase: “Please, Princess, feel free to make yourself… at… home… “
You may have realized the difficulty I faced well before I did. Simply put, I didn’t have much in the way of furniture that ponies might find comfortable. I stopped, completely flustered for a moment, but Celestia never missed a beat. She thanked me graciously, then folded herself up quite neatly on our couch, which was just barely large enough to hold her comfortably. With her legs tucked up underneath her, she looked far less intimidating, which may have helped my hosting sensibilities return, because it suddenly occurred to me to offer her a drink.
I ran through the options that we had, and she stopped me at lemonade. I quickly ran back out to the kitchen, grabbed the pitcher, some ice, and two glasses, and hurried back out to the dining room. The wave of unreality hit me again as I regarded Celestia, curled up on my couch like an overlarge housecat. With hooves, wings, and a horn. Shaking myself, I moved as calmly as I could out into the living room, poured out the lemonade, and had a seat myself.
It shouldn’t have shocked me when her horn glowed and the glass raised itself to her lips. It really shouldn’t have. But it still did. It was one thing, I learned at that moment, to see a magical creature. It was quite another to see actual magic being performed, and in your own house! I was utterly fascinated.
If my rapt attention to what must have been for Celestia the very mundane act of drinking lemonade bothered her in the least, she never showed a sign of it. Instead, she complimented me on the lemonade. Then she looked me firmly in the eye, and said this to me:
“And now, I imagine, it is time to start this interview.” Then, as I nodded emphatically, she continued on to say, “However, if you don’t mind… I would like to ask a few questions of you, first.”
I instinctively felt that my day had just gotten a lot more complicated.
Well.... Haven't quite seen a story like this before, or if I have it wasn't centered about Celestia. The detail you've put into the story is excellent, I have never seen anyone go into that much detail to describe any of the ponies, much less the Princess. I can't completely judge this story until I have a better idea as to were it will go, but at the moment keep up at what you are doing and set yourself apart from the other "Bronie meets Pony" stories. I wish you luck, and I will keep an eye on this story.
In the Name of Her Serene Majesty,
Celestia's Paladin: For Honor and Duty, For the Sun and Moon
You ought to have that fountain pen checked and adjusted by a professional. The kinds of ink flow problems you describe just aren't normal. Also, an ache in your wrist is a sure sign that you've been applying too much pressure. A fountain pen doesn't require nearly the kind of pressure on the page that a ballpoint does. That's why fountain pens are still the best for fatigue-free note taking.
Oh, and congrats on the interview. Celestia's a tough one to land.
Yeaaaaaaaaaaa.....ima call it one of the best story's I've ever read
I dub the story maker second class
MORE DAMMIT MORE!
Wow. Uh...wow.
Usually, I abhor fics like this for the simple reason that human insertion into the pony world is just plain...wrong. Whenever I see something like that, I scroll straight past it. Now, seeing this, I'm actually tempted to read a few of them.
Although the general premise, I admit, is a bit unoriginal, the execution of that premise is unlike anything I've seen. And, of course, the masterful prose demonstrated here makes the story even more attractive.
I am currently reserving judgement, pending development of plot, but my curiosity is piqued. Let's see how this turns out, shall we?
Hmmm... interesting, very interesting. Keep it up I really like where the story is going.
I will watch and i will read
Keep it up great work
This is clever. I like the direction I believe this will take.
Continue, good sir. I desire to read what happens next.
I'm liking what I see thus far, looking forward to seeing more of it. Favorited and 5-starred
An old tune got a remix, it seems. My good sir, you have turned "Yankee Doodle" and transformed it into something akin to "Stairway to Heaven". You have deservedly earned my compliments, and my thanks, for a rivteting story. If the rest of your work shapes up to be this magnificent, I have no doubt this could gain as much fame as other notable MLP fan fictions. Three hooves up. I'd say four, but levitation is more of an issue than balance.
This is...actually really good. And I'm surprised to see a Brony who sees Celestia for what she is: a wise, benevolent ruler of magic and grace, not a troll or nasty tyrant.
SPOILER ALERT!!!
Try to get through this quickly, though, because you’re missing the good parts.
-/LOL
is that your brain decides that it needs whatever processing power it can grab, and decides to free up resources by cutting your control to your legs.
-(See above)
“If you didn’t know that I existed, why did you invite me to visit you for an interview?”
-Well, that answers that question regarding the general text of the letter.
Saying that she was equine in nature, however, was like saying that a supermodel is really just a really a type of monkey.
-Nice...
the hairs of her mane and tail were individual and distinct.
Eh, I figured she didn't have hairs, just an energy-field that looked like (and for many purposes IS) a miniature version of the aurorae.
how conspicuous she was.
It was time to take this party indoors,
-This needs either one more carriage return, or one less.
She blinked suddenly and looked surprised.
-Surprised at the mystical feel (including none at all) of a sun not her own?
My host reflexes, trained into me over a period of years by my wife, kicked in, much to my relief. I now knew exactly how to act.
-Celestia is skilled at smoothing over social situations.
It shouldn’t have shocked me when her horn glowed and the glass raised itself to her lips.
-I was thinking SOMETHING about this before it happened, but I can't remember WHAT...
“However, if you don’t mind… I would like to ask a few questions of you, first.”
-This should be interesting...
Wow, impressive. Tracked, watched, and 5starred. Next chapter's going to be interesting!
I like it. Not really my type of story, but there would be no way to deny it's not excellently written, and that is good enough to turn something I wouldn't otherwise care for into something I enjoy.
57651
My thoughts exactly!
the description you gave of celestia was, for lack of better words, AWESOME. i really want to see were you are going with this story.
Wow, everyone. Thank you! While I was obviously hoping for a positive reaction, I wasn't expecting this! I'm both honored and humbled that you all like my story!
The good news is that after having to take a couple days off of writing due to work, I'm busily typing away on the rest of the chapters. I fully expect that I will have this completed by the end of the day on Sunday.
Thanks again for reading, and I hope I don't disappoint in the next few chapters!
`Hoopy
All of my stars for sharing and utilizing my fantasies far better than I could've put into words. I demand MOAR!
Hm! Quite a promising story so far. I had to stop reading halfway through due on an unrelated incident involving my friend and "buttah" (*giggling*), but I think this is definetly a story I'll be following. All my stars! Have them! xD
awwww a some what cliffhanger at the end. I think I sense more suspense around the corner ready to kick me in the head as I come around the corner to realize I will have to wait for the story at one point or another
Impressive, impressive, impressive. Only what, three chapters in? meerly the prelude?, and I already love it. You have managed to do what few other stories have; you've put just enough description in just the right places, with just the right timing... I am totally immersed. I find myself nodding along with and almost stuttering along with the nameless protagonist.
Excellent job. Rare is the story I'll give five stars to, but you've definitely earned them.
I have a question...
Was Celestia trying to move the sun when you mentioned to her that Sunset had finished, before you went inside for the interview...
( I noticed Celestia stare briefly off to the west, a look of concentration on her face. She blinked suddenly and looked surprised. I filed that away as a question to ask later...)
Overall an excellent story.. I just wish you would write more...
KimonoPony
*goes and burns letters to celestia* Y U NO WORK
Is it bad that when "Or an alien." came up I immediately thought "xenomorph"?
So, the way you described Celestia, physical appearance, in this chapter. Is that what ponies in Project: Sunflower (spoiler alert) look like when they go to Earth? Except for Erin, of course, because her cutie mark isn't real.
And if you think you know what Celestia looks like because you’ve seen her on the cartoon, then you’ve got another think coming.
Did you mean to write 'thing'? I hope not. Odd as it sounds, I think this sentence carries more weight as it is!
Best. Story. Ever.
3551457
'another think coming' is the expression, people seem to be using thing instead due to mishearing even though it doesn't really make sense.