chapter 41: the one that took way too goddamm long
Last time on bamboozled again!
"food?"
"No"
"food?"
"Yes"
"my brother is getting married!?"
"no u"
"What?"
"what?"
"what?"
"why is there a bug thing?
"i don't know. Just don't make eye contact"
*Derp increased to 100*
"if anyone objects to this-"
*raises hand*
"I got a few words"
"AHCHOO!"
"wow she's a changeling"
"your next"
"what?"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Canterlot castle
"how could you have possibly-RAGH!"
"there goes the cocaine"
Suddenly queen chrysalis ran and burst through a window while unleashing a primal scream. leaving the entire room confused.
"And there goes the queen"
The sound of shattering glass returned but this time much further away.
"THEY BROKE THE BARRIER!"
"oh no. What will we do?" Gary said emotionlessly
"only the power of love can save us"
"...I don't know..."
It seemed like Gavin's song was more effective than he had intended
"come on shiny."
"...ok I'll try"
The unicorn and alicorn embraced and a bright light flowed from Candece's horn
"it's not working! We need more love!"
"well how the hell do we-"
Suddenly Derpy swept Alex off his feet and went for a deep kiss. The light from Candece's horn was only matched in intensity by the shade of Alex's blush. Clyde was screaming about how he know this would happen, the mane six were gawking in aw, Noah was cheering his friend on and Gary was being dragged into a side room by John.
John grabbed a large latex glove he had filled with cocaine and put a bag over Gary's head. John then slipped the glove into the small opening before delivering a powerful right hook to Gary's face. Cocaine burst out of the glove and exploded the bag leaving a large white cloud around Gary's head. Gary exploded in a green flame and turned into a changeling because cocaine solved all of the weddings problems. Gary suddenly flew through a brick wall when exposed to the light, banishing Gary to the badlands.
With that problem solved John returned to the other room and finally saw what had given him the distraction he needed. They were still kissing even when the light died out. In fact they weren’t even breathing. John inspected the scene before he noticed that it wasn’t just those two who were frozen. John returned to the previous room and from the large hole in the wall he could only see one thing moving. It wasn’t Gary as he was in the air mid flip. The figure seemed to be arguing with someone.
Suddenly green lighting struck the figure and as it collapsed Gary started blasting off again and some bricks still on the wall flew off as well. The cheering from the other room resumed and the figure remained on the ground.
”this is bull shit! Why couldn’t I get one?”
“You ain’t aggressive enough Gavin”
”well at least that problem was...solved”
”...”
Nightmare looked nervous as Candece stared suspiciously at her
“...something wrong Candece?”
She hesitated before breaking her stare
”no I’m good just wondering how anyone could love that thing”
“What was that last part?
"so anyone up for pancakes?"
"ok"
"whuh?"
Alex broke free of his trance
"..."
The group went for pancakes and it took a minute for the wedding guests to process exactly what just happened
”...what the buck?”
There it is
The wedding was rescheduled for a week later as the pony’s clean up the large mess the changeling attack left in its wake.
“Wait you guys have IHOP?”
”yeah we do. But here it’s called IHOC (international house of cakes) Is it really that strange?”
“Hehehe. What do you like STREAT HOC?”
”well considering how we have these on earth with a similar name...yeah kinda.”
“wait. Earth? Like the ground we are standing on?”
Noah suddenly remembered that he had never told anyone about his home planet
“Gavin don-!”
”no I’m talking about the planet.”
”what!?”
“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!”
”wait-YOUR ALIENS?!”
Sirens rang out in the distance.
After a hour passed Noah managed to calm down twilight
They went inside and a waitress nervously approached the group full of aliens and royalty.
”can-can I help you?”
“Yes. Sandvich”
”what?”
“You know. Sandvich? Nom? It make me strong”
Noah’s heavy impersonation needed work.
”got rum?”
”oh I’m sorry we only serve that on Wednesday’s”
”...it is Wednesday”
”don’t care”
The waitress skipped the next five people plus earl until she hit royalty
”what may I get you princess Candice?”
”...ok I guess I’ll have-“
”ok that’s nice sweetie but can I get some advice?”
”(sigh) just divorce him and get it over with sandy”
”thanks doll”
The waitress promptly left the IHOC to go divorce her husband and gat all his stuff because even though this is a matriarchal society the girl always takes all the boys stuff. While this happened Noah noted Celestia in the corner stall with a tower of empty plates. He than witnessed Celestia devour a cake in a most princessly way: face first. He didn’t call Celestia out however as he needed to stop Alex and Derpy from leaving the IHOC and declaring war on the cake facility.
”JUST GIVE US THE DAMM RUM!”
”I DEMAND EQUALITY FREE RUM FOR ALL!”
Alex took out his speaker and started playing the U.S.S.R anthem and sang along to the words. When Derpy heard this she suddenly stopped and started to convulse
“ALEX STOP THE MUSIC!”
”YOU CANNOT STOP THE TIDE OF THE SOV-“
He stopped when he saw Derpy and promptly paused the song
”oh shit”
”SHE IS HAVING A MAGIC SEZURE!”
”WHO THE FUCK CREATED A TYPE OF MAGIC THAT CREATES SEZURES?!”
...well I guess me.
Because story stuff
”ok.ok I think it’s over”
Only one of Derpy’s eyes were lazy now
”uuugh...red?”
”-!
Ditzy?”
”did we do it?”
“Do what?”
”AH! WHO ARE YOU?!”
“I’m Noah”
”Noah? Wait you’re red’s friend!”
“Ok Alex. Explain.”
”can’t”
“Why not?”
”because one evil bastard over in the crystal kingdom has dinky”
“AND YOUR TELLING US THIS NOW?!”
”ok. Ditzy I need you to remain calm. But you arnt in 2023 anymore”
”WHAT?!”
”your back ditzy. That’s all that matters”
”Noah where are you going with this?”
”Mexico”
”what?”
”I’m very tired”
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I can say I one hundred percent contriputed to the creation of the best international home of cakes. Which diffenitly was not me jokeimg in dms. Anyways time to sleep ATM for it is very tiring playing games and reading after 11pm but you don't care. Oh Mexico exit 420 south bound is in a few miles.
9053083
Throw it into a blender and fuse it with ASMR ear rape and that’s it
Ok I don’t know who is who any more and it is amazing