Dear Faithful Student

by Muramasa

CHAPTER TWELVE

CHAPTER TWELVE:
WANT
SUNSET SHIMMER

---

What do you want, Sunset Shimmer?

In my life, I've wanted a lot of things.

When Celestia took me under her wing, I wanted to be the best student I could be. I wanted to do Equestria proud in my studies, and I wanted to learn the true power of magic and its place in the world. When I was relieved of my duties, to put it kindly, I wanted revenge, to show Celestia that I wasn't the failure she--and I as well, of course--knew myself to be. When I got to the human world, I wanted nothing more than to bring down the wrath I thought Celestia had brought down on me to everyone around me, and I wanted to rise to the top from scratch like I did in Equestria: just to prove to myself that I could.

When I got knocked down a peg and I truly got to know my six best friends, I wanted to leave the past behind. I wanted to start all over again, and I wanted to feel that warmth forever and ever that I never felt when I was in Equestria. For the longest time, in the human world, I had everything I could ever want.

And then I woke up one morning, rubbed my eyes, and wanted something else.

When I sat the girls down and explained my feelings, the first thing I did was assure them that my decision had nothing to do with them, the student body, Anon-a-Miss: any of that. It was so hard to explain partly because I didn't really know why my heart started hurting like it did.

Suddenly, the scenery around me felt wrong. Empty. I'd walk to school in the mornings and think about Equestria's rolling hills and snowcapped mountains, and every car that passed me was a carriage loudly rumbling by. I'd lay awake at night with the thought that the moon I was looking at wasn't the one I was used to. It was this creeping feeling everywhere I went, and I decided one morning that I couldn't stay in this world anymore.

I told the girls, and naturally, they were devastated. But it was Fluttershy who asked me the question that had been bouncing around my head since I returned to Equestria.

What do you want, Sunset Shimmer?

When I stepped through the portal to come home for the first time, I had that question burning through my mind like wildfire. I wanted to go home, but I didn't know how long that feeling would last or how much I would miss the human world that I had spent so much time in. I was nervous, but I found that those nerves subsided not long after I had sat down at that table to have dinner with Twilight and Celestia the night Violet showed up in the throne room.

It was strange, really. Even through the crazy revival of the dead and petrification of the Crystal Empire's denizens, I'd found my answer far quicker than I imagined I would.

Canterlot was my home. And I was so glad to be back.

As my boots clicked with every step and the wind coursed gently through my hair, I felt the memories of the human world fly back and forth through my mind. Playing with the Rainbooms, hanging out with my best friends after school, unlocking our magical potential: although I felt entirely at peace in Equestria, a day didn't go by where I wondered what they were doing.

I loved my friends. I wanted to visit them so, so bad.

But I couldn't. Not right now.

I would visit them when Equestria wasn't on the cusp of a silent disaster as it was at the moment (a silent disaster that, with the horror show Twilight and Rainbow went through in the Crystal Empire, was becoming worryingly louder amongst Equestria's citizens). If I saw them now, my paranoia would eat me alive and I wouldn't be able to enjoy our time together like I really wanted to.

I'd been walking on autopilot down the sidewalk towards the nearest tech store for quite some time, aware of the scenery but not invested in it. It was a ways away from Canterlot High, but that didn't really matter to me: I was gonna try and make this as quick as possible, and by the time I was done, Cobalt would have a few blueprints to play with that could hopefully give us the edge in our little battle. As a bonus, I needed to buy a laptop from the store to find and download the blueprints for them to print, so I planned to give him that as well for reverse-engineering purposes. He couldn't connect online, obviously, but I had a feeling the advanced tech would still make him very, very happy, and who knows: maybe he'd make something cool out of it or even become Equestria's very first web developer.

Suddenly, I felt myself trip on the sidewalk, and before I knew it I was stumbling forward haphazardly. I hadn't walked in a human body for quite some time now, and so the muscle memory that would normally have saved me failed to activate as I careened to the ground. I looked back immediately to see a rather large stick sitting in the middle of the sidewalk, and I chastised myself silently before hopping to my feet once more. As I got up and looked around, dusting my leather jacket off and craning my neck side to side, a very familiar sight caught the corner of my vision.

It was my little red house I'd worked so hard to own. I could have questioned how cheesy and perfect it was that I quite literally stumbled into it, but at that moment, I didn't really care: I had entirely forgotten the route to the tech store passed by it, and I was just glad to see it again. It was two stories, but that was deceiving: the bedroom was the entire top floor, and the living room, kitchen, and bathroom were all downstairs. I'd sold it not long before I left for good (I'd brought the money back with me for spending funds during my inevitable future trips) so I couldn't exactly walk in, but I certainly could stare at it longingly as for however long I wanted to.

So I did.

I sold everything, really. The hardest was my guitars, my amps, and my pedalboard. I could get all of those back in Equestria, of course (I'd been meaning to do it first thing until Violet showed up), but there was one guitar I didn't sell: I gave my Flying V, my very favorite guitar, to Rainbow Dash before I left. I knew she was taking good care of it, but seeing my old house made me think of it nonetheless.

She better not have smashed the damn thing.

I took a few steps forward, looking more stringently at the tiny house. The person I'd sold it to--a single man just moving into town in his mid-thirties--appeared to be taking good care of the place, though it didn't seem like he was home at the moment. It had been repainted recently, and though I had no control over what the guy did to it, it made me happy that he elected to keep it the same color.

I couldn't help but feel a smile form on my lips as I scanned the place one last time. After my final inspection, I quickly turned my heels to continue on my way towards the tech store, but I don't think I even took a step and a half before I heard a voice call out behind me.

"Sunset?"

Oh, I'd know that voice anywhere.

If any of my friends had happened upon me, I was secretly happy it had been Fluttershy. Her Equestrian counterpart was the only Element of Harmony that hadn't made it to Canterlot yet (though I suspected she'd be there or very close whenever I returned) and so it'd been a little while since I heard that soft tamber.

I missed it.

"Hey, Flutters," I said, turning around slowly. I still had that grin on my face, and when I got a full sight of hers I knew it'd only be seconds before I'd be crushed by an embrace. Sure enough, she ran as fast as she could and collided with me with a strength that would probably surprise anyone who met her.

I let her hold on to me for what seemed like a lifetime before she let go, and she still had that glow on her visage when she finally spoke.

"I didn't know you were coming! And so soon!" She began, pulling out her phone. "Should I text the girls?" I gently put a hand on it, causing her countenance to twist up in confusion.

"I... I can't stay long," I told her. "A lot of stuff happened over in Equestria, and it's kind of an emergency. I'm here to get some plans and blueprints to make some technology that could help us." I could immediately see her face drop, and it was a sight I always hated: years of tormenting Fluttershy only made her sorrowful gazes that much worse whenever I saw it happen.

"I understand," she said after a while. "You will come visit though, right?" I couldn't help but laugh a little at that one, and before I knew it I had nodded my head down the direction I was about to walk in to get to the tech store.

"Of course I will," I told her. "You got anywhere you're supposed to be at the moment? Let me fill you in."

---

"You really think he can build that?"

I'd told her exactly the blueprints I planned on bringing Cobalt on that flash drive. It was something I knew he'd likely take liberties with, especially since the machine was going to be designed for ponies and not humans--not to mention the fact that I couldn't give him anything too advanced, since all of the crazy stuff was beyond Equestria's current technological means--but I found a confident smirk build slowly across my face as I nodded in confirmation.

"I know he can," I began. "He already built an airship, and I looked over some of his equations for a few new ideas he had. He's the real deal." Fluttershy had seemed enamored with the whole situation since I outlined it to her, but the thought of Cobalt building what I'd described had entirely fascinated her.

"That's incredible," she began. "And Violet seems to get along with him well? It'd be a shame if some of her apprentices had to work together if they didn't like each other." I chuckled a little bit at that question, and I raised my eyebrows as we stopped to wait for the light to change at a crosswalk.

"That definitely isn't a problem. I think Violet's getting along with Cobalt very well," I replied. I could instantly see a sparkle in Fluttershy's eye as her facial expression matched mine exactly.

"Oooooh," she hummed teasingly, laughing a bit as we began to cross. She stayed silent for a moment, seemingly reflecting on what I'd told her as our shoes hit the road in a steady rhythm, but she spoke up softly after a few seconds of stillness.

"Will they all still be there?" she asked. Once we reached the end of the crosswalk, I let myself process her words again before looking over to her with confusion.

"Hmm?" I asked, looking to her for clarification. She had a bit of gloomy look on her face, and she seemed to think about her own words before responding.

"I was thinking about Violet and Cobalt, but really everyone," she began. "Let's say you defeat Zenith--"

"Zephyr," I corrected, unable to hold a teasing grin from my face.

"Zephyr, like my brother. I'm sorry," she said apologetically. I was going to let her know she didn't need to apologize for such a simple mistake, but she never gave me the chance.

"Let's say you defeat Zephyr, or whoever else is causing these ponies to come back," she began. "What if... what if the students go away, too, once whatever went wrong becomes right? What if they don't go? Will all of them want to live their lives over again?"

I hadn't admitted it to anyone else back home, but I had thought about that. There was a chance that the new relationships all of us had built would come tumbling down once we solved this mystery, and it seemed so far that every returning apprentice regained consciousness right after they died. I didn't know how they would react if they died yet again, but there was also the matter of them not dying, and if they would want to live life all over again if they still remained after whatever magic brought them back was taken care of.

I'd thought about it for a long time, and I was certain another purple mare had, too. But after all the thinking I'd done, I didn't really have any answers.

"We'll have to cross that bridge when we get there," I said simply. "I just don't know. Violet and I have become really close lately... I don't wanna think about it right now if that makes sense. I just wanna figure out what happened, and I think what I'm doing now can help get that done faster." Fluttershy nodded knowingly, deep in thought with the analysis of my answer, It was like that for some time, the people behind us slowly brushing past as I slowed down in a subconscious effort to make my time with Fluttershy last only just a bit longer, but she eventually spoke up again with a very simple question.

"Is it still what you wanted?" she asked.

I'd been expecting an inquiry like that one for the entire walk, and it had honestly taken a bit longer than I expect it to. I knew she was likely secretly hoping for a different answer, but Fluttershy was one of my best friends, and I was always gonna be honest with her when it counted.

"Yeah," I said simply. "Yeah, it is. I'm very happy."

It wasn't a very complicated answer, but I was glad about that, for once. I had a very complicated relationship with Equestria for the longest time, but I also had a very complicated relationship with the world I was currently in: I'd hit my absolute lowest of lows here right after I'd turned into that demon, but the friends I'd come to have brought me out of that and into some of the best moments of my life. But Equestria was a blank slate to me now, and for the first time in a very long time, I felt like I truly belonged somewhere and wasn't someone who didn't belong constantly trying to do so.

I expected a sad reaction of some sort from Fluttershy, but I got quite the opposite: she had that warm glow on her face she held when she first saw me earlier.

"I'm glad," she said softly. "That's what we all want for you, you know. And if you ever change your mind or just want to visit for a few days, we're always here." I nodded slowly, doing my absolute best not to break out into tears in the middle of a crowded sidewalk.

"I know you are," I said simply.

And that was that. We talked about a few basic things in the remaining short time there, stuff about school and how excited the girls were for college. It was small talk, but it still felt good, and it wasn't long before the tech store loomed high above us and we turned to each other.

"So, uh... this is goodbye, then," Fluttershy said. I sighed heavily and nodded, gesturing towards the door with my hands.

"Yeah. I think I'll be back pretty late, but I don't know if Cobalt sleeps anyways." The joke went without any laughter, and there was a moment of silence between us as a few people shuffled past where we were standing with grumbles. The day's pattern seemingly continued, however, as Fluttershy broke the long streak of silence.

"When are we gonna see you again?" she asked. I shrugged my shoulders in defeat, and I knew well my face had to look downright clueless when I responded.

"When this is all over. And I don't know when that's gonna be," I replied. "But I'll do it as soon as I can. I promise." I held out my arms for another hug, and she gladly accepted it: I was willing to let her stay there as long as she wanted, but she thankfully didn't stay too long as she unlocked herself from my arms with a wide smile.

"Say hello to the girls for me," I told her, and she nodded vigorously before slowly drifting backward.

"Of course," she said. "Have fun back home! We'll be waiting for you!"

I watched her walk back until she disappeared around the corner of the parking lot. I had no idea what time it was, but I knew Fluttershy's diversion had cost me a bit: it didn't really matter, though, as Cobalt and Celestia could hash out the logistics and economics of the upcoming build tomorrow when they got into his hooves. For now, though, I had to get everything, and so I turned myself around and walked into the store.

The store was very large, but its laptops were among the very first thing that one could see when their shoes hit the stark white tile. I walked over to the row of computers and began combing through the labels and aesthetics of the units, trying to see what would be best for Cobalt to mess around on. Slowly walking down the aisle, I found myself thinking out loud as I began to move the trackpad on one of the more expensive models.

"Now, what do I want... "

Comments

[Yutah123]

"Oooooh," she hummed teasingly, laughing a bit as we began to cross. She stayed silent for a moment, seemingly reflecting on what I'd told her as our shoes hit the road in a steady rhythm, but she spoke up softly after a few seconds of stillness.

I like this upbeat Fluttershy. Well, I like all Fluttershies— strike that, I like most Fluttershies, but I like this one in particular.

"Zephyr, I'm sorry," she said apologetically. I was going to let her know she didn't need to apologize for such a simple mistake, but she never gave me the chance.

Heh, no remark about how it’s the same name as Fluttershy’s brother, Zephyr Breeze?

Now that I think about it, that goes for the Equestrian Fluttershy, too.

[Muramasa]

9412672
I totally forgot about that! I may have to make mention of that in an edit. Thanks for the catch!

[Avatar Sprite]

Has sunset even considered that the same thing that caused the return of violet and Cobalt, is what caused her sudden homesickness?

[tsaukpaetra]

Well whatever she gets, it needs to include a really flexible power converter...

[Harwick]

This was a fun chapter, and I would have been disappointed had Sunset not run into any of her friends on her visit. I am always a bit sad when the Equestria Girls characters don’t show any interest in how Princess Twilight is doing (and Vice-versa), in stories or in canon. She was their friend first, before Sci-Twi or even Sunset, and it’s a bit depressing that they have so little to do with each other since Rainbow Rocks.

In any event, I’m really enjoying the story and nearly caught up...

[Csquared08]

"When are we gonna see you again?"

Side story, pls

[Edguy0009]

9423276
Which you can get some at Tosche Station.

[Six String]

9716493 Just stay away from Mos Eisley. It's a wretched hive of scum, amd villiany.

[Edguy0009]

9865302
If possible that is.

[Thranx]

Imagine if instead of heading to the tech store, Sunset beelines for the gun store. A firearm would do wonders. Let Cobalt reverse-engineer the AR-15. Unless if they're planning to reform Zephyr rather than killing him that is, which is not an effective reformation method—like at all.