• Member Since 1st Aug, 2011
  • offline last seen 4 hours ago


An aspiring Author honing his skills by writing about these silly little ponies. A Fox of few words outside the realm of fiction, unless he gets on a roll with something.



Twilight has discovered a strange old book purportedly written by Star Swirl the Bearded, and Rainbow Dash discovers a latent spell in it that transports the two ponies to a strange island in the middle of nowhere. With no viable options available to them, Twilight and Rainbow begin to search the island for clues to a way home and the reason behind the odd puzzles and contraptions presented to them.

Dramatic Reading here.

Chapters (14)
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Comments ( 189 )

Wow this is realy good hope to see more soon

The prose is mechanically quite sound (an altogether too rare thing), the characters and plot appear well written so far, and I am already quite fond of the two things being fused. I have given this story five stars and am quite interested indeed in seeing how it develops.

Just from the synopsis it was no mystery as to what the crossover was with. I like! :twilightsmile:

The only issue I have with this is that it seems like a large text wall so far. One thing that helps is indenting paragraphs. Great hook, and I want to read more, but I kept feeling like I was just reading one really long paragraph in there.

:derpytongue2: Sorry 'bout that. I'm not completely used to the method of moving my fics from the original .doc file to fimfiction.
All better now though. :twilightblush:


Thank you thank yoou

...Was that last line supossed to be a pun? Seriously! Think on how this sounds!

"Twilight was absorbed in the book."

:pinkiegasp: That didn't even occur to me!
My pre-reader Miyajima thought I was hiding a reference to one of those new blind-bag ponies with poor Rarity's :raritydespair: impromptu coat dye job.
:trixieshiftleft: confound my unconscious mind, making these puns and references without telling me :trollestia:

Nyx is in this story!

Interesting developments.

I have, however, noticed that this latest chapter appears to have a larger number of mechanical errors than the previous one; you might want to be more careful about such things in the future.

Quite intriguing, this. When you mentioned the extra passageway, I stopped reading for a while to try and make sure I hadn't missed something from the game. I also don't recall a world with a name that could be turned into "Everdunes"... Very interesting. The prose quality appears to have improved somewhat, too.


"Everdunes" is Atrus' name for the Selenitic Age.

Ah, thank you. Oh, and congratulations on getting on EQD!

This is expertly done. Watching Twi and Dash fill the shoes of the Stranger is entertaining and nostalgic (we've all been there), and you've done an excellent job of recreating Myst Island. By building Aitran within the ponyverse, you've removed all potential for conflict with Myst canon. (Thank you for that, by the way. I'm a serious fan of the Myst series and it would have been painful to see a crossover fouled up by something as small as details.) I'm enjoying it so far.

And now... I shall pick one nit. Just one: the linking panel is at the front of the book.

That said, good work and keep it up. Shorah b'shem, sel-tahn! :twilightsmile:

:ajbemused: No, no it's not. Everdunes is an Age referred to but never visited in the games. Selenitic was never a populated Age.

>the linking panel is at the front of the book.
Had I gone with that, Twi would've found the panel before Dash even showed up and I'd only have the one pony to use. :derpytongue2:

Must not have paid close attention to that journal... :ajsleepy:

Votahr ah ’shehm khehkamrov kehnehm g’chehv ah’shehm khehkam l’ahrtahehm.

Maybe it's because I've never played the game, but the mechanical and puzzle sections are a bit hard to follow. Could be just me, though.:derpytongue2:

That's ok. The IN GAME mechanical and puzzle sections are a bit hard to follow, too. Which reminds me, I still need to finish Myst V. I've put that off for too long.

I loved Myst as a kid. Riven especially, but the original was good too. I keep wanting to shout at Twilight and Rainbow Dash not to trust either Archeon or Cirrus, but hopefully they'll figure that out before they make a...permanent mistake.

Sigh. Back to waiting for a new chapter...
Keep up the good work.

I think you might need to fix the formatting for this chapter.

Other than that, good stuff. Looking forward to the next chapter.

I derped the indents again?! :facehoof: :raritydespair:
Fixed now. Hopefully I won't forget again... :trixieshiftleft:

:twilightangry2: This chapter was so hard to write! Such a boring world to describe... :ajsleepy: At least it's over with. :unsuresweetie:
Next chapter's shaping up to be more... interesting. So bear with me please :duck:

When I went to reply Myst recently I deliberately skipped over this world. I know it kind of ruins the effect but my god do I hate that underground rail system. That thing frustrated me more then anything else in Myst is it seemed more trial and error then the rest of the game.

Ah, that lovely, hated rail. I wonder if RD is going to figure out the correct 'go' 'no-go' tones or just guess her way through?:rainbowhuh:

liking the story so far, though i have one question... could you please try to separate the text into paragraphs ?

walls of text make my eyes hurt :fluttershysad:

Rainbow dash should have an easier time with Mechanical fortress then the Selenitic tunnels *shivers*

Please update!

P.S. are you planning a sequel with Riven? because that would blow my socks off :pinkiehappy:

Secure thy socks to thy feet. :trollestia:

This was a good enough chapter. I can tell you struggled some though. The writing isn't quite as good as yours usually is. I'll leave some notes about the obvious editing mistakes in case you later decide to go back through for polishing and don't want to pick over everything yourself.

""She was sitting on the floor of the rocket with the musical lock panel in front of her, but with the sliders all reset to the bottom and behind her was the pipe organ, although the journal she’d propped up on it was absent, as was the book she’d just used.""
---Run on sentence. Split it at "bottom and behind" to "bottom. Behind"

""What they hay?""
---What the Hay?

""catching her breathe""

""When Rainbow reached the point where the natural wall on her left ended, she could see a large grandfather-style clock tower ahead of her, while off to the left there was a paved path leading over a small bump and then climbing to the top of a cement enclosure and beyond and to the left of that Dash could just make out the shapes of trees through the fog.""
---run on sentence again, split at "cement enclosure and beyond and" "to cement enclosure. Beyond and" or semicolon instead.

""She made her way to the stairs leading up to the cement enclosure and started climbing the stairs to the top.""
---remove the 2nd "the stairs"

""contained two triangular button""

""then yellow five buttons""
---five yellow

""The metal walkway Rainbow as on""
--- "as" should be "was"

""embedded in the walls ever few feet""
--"ever" should be "every"

Out of curiosity what would your take on a ponified version of Saavedro be?

Y'know, :applejackunsure: I keep going back and forth on whether or not I can fit Saavedro into the history I'm building for this fic and its follow-ups. I mean, I know everyone would be all :pinkiegasp: or :flutterrage: if I skipped over Exile, but at the same time I have no idea how I'd work it in. If I were to use him, he'd more likely be something like a Zebra, a Buffalo, or even a Diamond Dog instead of a pony. Or maybe a sheep? I dunno. :derpytongue2: I haven't thought much farther ahead than Riven yet.

Now, you'll probably be like :facehoof: "Vulpin, the means and motive for Saavedro would be a breeze to transplant directly into your pony-Myst verse!" That would be true only if Star Swirl's history was the same as Atrus's. Which it isn't :trollestia:

you my friend have inspired me to play mist again because when I started reading chapter 2 a wave of nostalgia smacked me dead in the face. And I want to say thank you! This is a great read and looking forward to the other chapters! :twilightsmile:

Awwwww :fluttershysad:, I was looking forward to seeing Twilight and Rainbow's reactions to the morbid stuff in Archeon's hidden room like he has in Myst, like the caged skeleton, but still, an awesome chapter.:yay:

So they didn't try the leaver on the cage then.

...Possibly for the best. Also Rainbow is cheating :(

Cheating? Maybe, but I just couldn't find a good reason for her NOT to be able to fly this time around.:rainbowwild:

As someone who hasn't played Myst, I'm glad to see I can still understand what;s going on. You're obviously not getting too wrapped up in the small details. Just as well really, or I would probably give up on this one. I would like a bit more interaction between RD and Twilight, mind you. Other than that, I'm pretty glad I stumbled on this one!

If you haven't played it I'd suggest playing realMYST Same game, same puzzles, same story, but with more freedom of movement and better graphics. As the blurb stated, it's the game the MYST ream wanted to make at the time but the technology. wasn't quite there yet.

Loving this story, can't wait to see more. Not going to spoil it for those who haven't played the game, but I do hope the ending here is the 'best' ending you can get in the MYST game.

Also, a quick question to the author, do you think once this story is done we'll get to see variations of Riven, MYST III, and so on? Not that I'd expect it, but I'm hopeful at the very least. :twilightsmile:

It's been too long since you updated. I missed my Myst ponies :twilightsmile:

Yay, update!
...And now I have to wait for the next one again!

Sorry this chapter took so long. I got writer's block about halfway through and then switched focus to another project for a little bit. Y'know, typical writer stuff :derpytongue2:. I foresee focusing on this story for the next few weeks, so the next update should come quicker. :pinkiehappy:


And now we get to read about the Ston-Baseli. I hated that place and it's evil, evil puzzle.:twilightangry2: *mumble mumble* stupid circuit board *mumble mumble* Because of it, I never even finished the first game, and it wasn't until I found out about RealMyst3D years later that I actually got to the ending. Through brute-force trial and error. Then I looked at a walkthrough and found out the convoluted solution, which is practically stated in the journal, that made me really hate the place.:flutterrage:

But that's not important anymore, what is important is how unbelievably awesome this story is.:rainbowkiss: Please hurry and write MOAR!

Aww, yeah. Ponies gonna get wet maned...
I mean, great chapter, looking forward to more.
Surprising a story about solving puzzles is so entertaining.

Is it ironic that although Cirrus's rooms have more stuff in them as a rule, it's much more fun to describe Archeon's rooms? I'm always second-guessing myself when I use the word "ironic" :ajbemused:

Achenar/Archeon tends to have more "toys" that leave an impression than Cirrus/Sirrus. The latter's just "hey look, I'm RICH! Be jealous! :duck: " While the former's all ":flutterrage: I keel yu!"
... I had to use a Fluttershy emoticon to illustrate the scary evil that is Achenar. THAT is ironic...


That second irony isn't really ironic considering that Fluttershy is the most terrifying of all ponies.


See what I mean?

They were both very twisted individuals. So after this it's just the wood, or are you going to include the ice land from realMyst?

You've got a bit of awkward, repetitive phrasing here:
"and a similar plank bridge linked the rear ship half to something under a large umbrella.  Twilight wasn’t anywhere in sight.

“Twilight?” Rainbow called out as she flared her wings and prepared to land on the rear ship fragment.

“Over here Rainbow,” the unicorn called out.  Looking around, Rainbow saw her standing in what looked like a crow’s nest rising out of the sea and shielded from the rain by the large umbrella."

This is better than what I thought it would be

and first to comment:pinkiehappy::yay:



Crud...I wish I had known what this was about sooner. I wouldn't have wasted my time trying to make my own rendition of it.

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