• Published 31st Mar 2018
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Airship Mauled - Darkonshadows



We crash landed on a goddess. Welcome to Airship Mauled, where everything could possibly be worse.

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Chapter Seventy Two, Swing and a Misses: Authorized.

-Manehatten Hospital, Fizzy-

I caught the ball in my hoof as it bounced back to me, it had good bounce and it didn’t weigh too much to play with. This scorched green ball really shouldn’t mean so much to me, but given my foal days... it meant a lot and it was special.

That is aside from having come screaming out of the sky covered in Poison Joke cure to save Jade’s life, it was a different kind of special from that. I sighed and leaned back to stare at it, I was never going to lose this ball.

Jade would be fine, but she was going to be on a drip for a while though. I looked over to Mara and Maria.

Mara’s right side had some damage, which matched the damage on Maria’s left side, they both had back injuries. Maria’s horns were also badly cracked and falling apart, but they’d grow back fully the next time they went through a molt. They’d need Marie to be connected to them as she’s what causes that to happen.

Marie was completely fine, but she wasn’t currently allowed to fuse with her sisters at the moment, even if she wanted to share the pain. She wasn’t leaving her sister’s sides however.

“So… I know we never officially had ‘the scene’ yet, but when do you suppose we should pop that bubble?” That was a good question Marie, it was actually kind of a hard question to ask. We all had the rings for it.

The only thing we hadn’t done was officially ask each other the question of ‘will you marry me’. We were officially ready for when we did say yes to that, not like any of us would ever say no. I wanted both my chimera and kitty to be in an official herd with me, provided that no shenanigans occurred.

“It’s… a pretty big step.” That and I didn’t exactly have a job as Twilight’s royal guard yet, Maries were still lawyers and we were all financially sound thanks to that. At least there would always be enough money so that feeding a chimera wouldn’t be an issue, also living near mom would cut down on the costs with her magical cooking.

I didn’t want to say goodbye to Airship Mauled, but making a commute between Canterlot and there would take some of my time every morning unless I can get a long distance teleport spell down to perfection. I definitely had the magic power for it.

“That and do we want Jade to ask us or do we ask her, do we ask each other?” Marie was asking all the right questions, definitely the smartest snake I’ve ever met. “Our ring were just the opening bit, then there’s the fact that you asked Twilight to officiate for us and now all that’s left is to pop a question and set a date.”

“It’s just a question, why are we waffling on it when we already gave her a ring?” If that didn’t already prove to me what the answer was Mara, then I didn’t know what it would be. “She’s even tied it into her magical alchemy necklace.”

“True… but shouldn’t we try to woo her a little. She spent most of her time on our dates wooing us, and quite successfully too. She spent as much time on that as we spent those wonderful camping trips with one another snuggled together.” Maria grumbled bringing her chin to her chest as she rested on her stomach. “We should make a romantic showing, find a place we can all eat at and then just actually get the proposal out there you know. I like the ring of Misses Bloody Maries Berrytwist La Perm.”

“We’re not going with my family name, also I’m now realizing how provocative Berrytwist sounds when in reference to stallions… though there are a few stallions whose berries I’d like to twist as painfully as possible. I kind of want to drop it for just being La Perm. I have nothing wrong with or against being a Bloody, but I’m trying to stay away from the Storm Queen connotations and don’t want rumors flying around about my name.” I waved a hoof at them trying to gesture that I was still having some issues with it. “You’re keeping the clan name though Maries, don’t change traditions on my account.”

“We would do that for you.” Even when they were all currently separated, Maries could synch up their voices perfectly to act as one.

“You don’t have to and I will never ask you to.” I snorted and smiled at them, those three were one of a kind in a literal sense. “Though Jade might want to be Jaded 'Bloody' La Perm. She can be a pretty big jerk, especially to the royal guard, and she would think having Bloody in her name would be in good humor.”

“Yep, she’s our lovable petty kitty.” The three agreed in unison and we all giggled.

“So Hayburger anywhere, The Witch’s Fare in Airship Mauled or Savoir and Savors in Ponyville? As we all know, Jade doesn’t do fancy.” The three immediately started arguing with one another, all it took was a single question and I couldn’t keep the slightly demented smile off my face. “There’s also The Tasty Treat in Canterlot or we could simply do the infamous ‘Las Pegasus Food Hop’. I’m not exactly picky here, just so long as you don’t expect me to eat too much junk food.”

That only made the arguing worse between the three currently separated sisters.

We had to eventually come up with something meaningful for our adorable nuisance, that would take getting these three to agree on something.

-Elsewhere in the hospital, Skelly-

I opened my eyes weakly and saw the smiling face of Fortitude looking over me. The pain I was in was quite egregious, but at least I knew I was alive… somewhat.

I’m going to bet that I’m still living impaired, also that it was daytime since I could see the fur on my nonexistent nose.

“I am Fortitude the Fantastical Fragrant… and I am glad that you are being alright Skelly.” He took up my right hoof and smiled at me. “You are almost being dead, er… deader… deadest? You are almost going to Yakhalla without us close friend!”

“I can be confirming that, it was being pretty close for Skelly.” Eir the Valkyrie?! What was she doing here? “You are being very strong willed, also very lucky that your companion healed your damaged bones. I would have had to ferry you otherwise.”

“Say Eir, where’s Ragna?” I looked over to see that Flamberge was being tended to by a nurse hat wearing Sweetcakes. “Isn’t your pet always with you?”

The sudden look of horror on Eir’s face was mildly disturbing to us.

“Oh… oh no... oh dear… Eir is maybe having left Ragna in Yakhalla last time Eir visited…” Eir quickly disappeared in a flash, we looked at each other.

“Please don’t end in an eldritch abomination, please for the love of all that is holy don’t let it become an eldritch abomination thing, especially one with acid spewing tentacles!” Flamberge was chanting that like a prayer with his eyes closed.

A portal opened up and Eir backed into the room with a boulder that was somehow expressing immense amounts of guilt, Eir was currently beating back several large black tentacles with sickly yellow undersides with a heavily bladed and spiked mace.

Never actually saw the great Eir wield a weapon before, but she was treating it like an old friend. I would help, but I was still in too much pain to get out from the covers of the bed. Fortitude was also going to be kept busy protecting both me and Sweetcakes.

“Damnation!” Flamberge stated sullenly. Even in his state, he still got up started to wail on the tentacles with his flaming sword and helped the Valkyrie push them back. The tentacles thankfully didn’t spew acid, but they did spew bunches of what looked like sour grapes everywhere when injured.

Once the tentacles were beaten back, Eir swiftly closed the portal after one last swing of her mace.

“Eir hopes no one in Yakhalla realizes that this is Eir’s fault…” Eir said quietly while looking sheepish. “Also Ragna is being a very bad rock of increasing danger! Bad Ragna, very bad Ragna!”

Eir pointed her hoof at the sulking boulder.

I didn’t even know how I knew it was sulking, I just did.

“At least these sour grapes are tasty…” Giving Fortitude a seriously flat stare, he paused in the middle of eating some grapes. “What, why are you looking at me like that close friend?”

I rolled my eyes. Only Fortitude, and possibly Flamberge, would eat grape bunches that came out of an eldritch horror.

“You should not eat those, they might be bad for your health, the grapes of weird wrath.” Sweetcakes knew enough to speak for me and I nodded.

“They taste fine to me.” Fortitude popped another grape in his mouth.

-Hospital Cafeteria, Kuril-

“I’m fine Blade, really. I didn’t get too seriously hurt.” I’m more worried about how all of my kittens are doing, a mother’s work was never done. “If you really want to help me, then cut up some of those onions for me please.”

I really needed to make more potions, I also needed to retrieve my staff. I could have thrown a shape shifting potion at Stochastic, but I doubt it would have worked on her with how powerful she became. I really didn’t expect her to target me, probably should have given I was denying her the use of her horn.

I watched as Blade took up a knife and started to husk and chop up some onions with precision. I didn’t like to be idle, so here I was doing some volunteer work in the hospital. Nobody was going to complain, hospital food in general wasn’t great unless I was involved.

I stirred the soup and figured that soon after I add the onions I would need to let it simmer for a bit, the smell of something cooking was as divine as it always was. Having Blade cooking in the kitchen with me was even better.

Blade soon moved over to hover above the pot and she scraped the onions into my soup, I nodded and put the lid on the pot then pointed to the blenders. Blade gave me a look and then nodded, she started getting out some ice and fruit.

I was getting pretty thirsty working over a hot stove and a nice drink would hit the spot. Blade was one of the few bat pony’s that could control themselves around fruit, occasionally some fruits were just too alluring for her.

I took a small break and saw Flotsam talking to that stallion I met yesterday at one of the tables, they seem to be hitting it off pretty well. Maybe Flotsam had a keeper this time, Jacky told me about how much her crewmate complains about wanting a special romantic somebody and her biology was getting in the way.

“So yeah, it’s almost impossible to prevent Jacky’s injuries.” Flotsam stated as I walked up to the two.

“Having a good time?” I asked as I came up behind them.

“Yes, I am, thank you for asking Kuril. So…” Flotsam paused and then turned back to me, then looked to her partner she was drinking fruit juice with. “Right, you weren't looking for Kuril?”

“Yes, er… ugh…” I could already see Mr. Wheel Twist’s allergies were acting up and pulled out a potion. One chug and his allergic reaction to my very presence cleared up immediately. “Thank you, um… how much do these potions cost to make? I could use a few more of them.”

“Depends, are you supplying the ingredients yourself or do I have to gather them to make the potions?” While busy pondering over my words, I added. “Supplying ingredients is cheaper than making me gather them personally. While I do have a supplier and good friend in a zebra witch doctor, she has her own potions to brew. These first few potions are on me, but you’ll have to pay for the few after this. Think about how you want to buy them and I’ll see to making some more.”

I took out two more potions and sat them on the table.

“Thank you again… you have no idea how much you’ve done for me.” Wheel Twist took up the two potions.

“Just don’t take too much at one time, a few sips should clear anything up for a few hours of protection from your allergies.” I smiled at the two and hugged Flotsam. “Have fun you two and I’m sure Jacky will be ready for visitors soon enough, my poor little chick has one too many teeth in her and none of them are actually hers.”

I started to walk away to let them enjoy their drinks.

“I was actually wanting to talk to you some more, also…” He pulled out a pouch and put some bits on the table. “Whatever that wonderful smell is, we’ll have some!”

“Paying for Flotsam, my how chivalrous of you Mr. Twist. Right, two vegetable specials coming up!” I leaned closer to Flotsam. “My advice is to dig your claws into him and don’t let go, he’s a good one.”

The poor sea pony blushed furiously as I walked away whistling to myself.

-Intensive Care Unit, Celestia-

I just came from Jacky and learned that Liberty was going to be stuck as an animate statue for the foreseeable future until Jade is well enough to personally remove the Animating Album.

I already paid for the various bills for Jade and her friends, I was rich and had plenty of bits to burn on helping her. I didn’t do near well enough to protect her from those who would seek to harm her, so I can make amends in other ways. Thankfully the cost of this was being heavily cut because of Dr. Bones being nice.

Walking into the room I looked down at Jade and the steady beep of her heart rate monitor, she wasn’t doing too badly.

Now looking at Stochastic on the other hoof, she almost looked like a piñata.

Wait a moment, the cast they put on her is a little too colorful…

Looking at it a little more closely, I saw that they actually did put Stochastic into a piñata. That is both embarrassing and quite cruel. I’m surprised Dr. Bones said Stochastic could make a full recovery, and that the good doctor has a mean sense of humor.

“Seeing my friend like this is supposed to be sad, yet it fills my heart with joy to see her on the mend and that her heart is beating steadily.” Sekhet stated from her position next to Jade. “So… how about a riddle?”

“I’m game, my sister is currently helping Baast learn about all the modern conveniences of this era. That and to get Baast away from me since she wouldn’t stop making horrible innuendos and euphemisms.” This could prove fun, so I decided to indulge her. “How many does she exactly have?”

“A lot. Ahem… I can be blind, I can be powerful, I can be difficult, deep, complicated and tender at the same time.” Sekhet smirked at me. “What am I?”

“Lovable.” I giggled, one of Cadence's favorites.

Author's Note:

Next page will be skipping to when Jade wakes up.

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