• Published 25th Jul 2012
  • 21,744 Views, 1,877 Comments

The Secret Life of Rarity - BronyWriter

Rarity has a deep dark secret that she cannot control but must hide from the world.

  • ...

Magic, Apples, and Reckoning

That stupid foal didn't know what she was taking about! Rarity was far more complex than 'I do it to feel powerful.' That was a very base explanation. Really now, why in Equestria would she do it just to feel powerful? She did it to protect her friends! She did it because she... she...

If Krissy was so wrong then why were her words continually echoing throughout Rarity's mind?

"Why so brutal?"

"Beg pardon?"

"I mean, did you have to bury her alive? Couldn't you have just done it quickly and painlessly?"

"Well... I suppose that I could have."

"But you didn't want to. You wanted to make her suffer."

"I suppose I did."

"You wanted to have power over her, to show that you were the one in control now."

"Uh... I suppose if you want to think of it that way then—"

"So what I said before is true, you do it just to feel powerful,"

Rarity violently shook her head. S-she was merely being foolish and that was the end of it!

Rarity stared at her workroom and the thought briefly crossed her mind that she should clean up the mess in there but...

Krissy had been dead for about six hours now and Rarity didn't know what to do with herself. She felt that she needed to do SOMETHING or else she would go absolutely insane. Heck maybe she was already going insane. Her thought process was nothing but Krissy's piercing words, playing over and over and over and over andoverandOVERANDOVER!!! They. Just. Would. Not. STOP!! She wasn't that predictable, she wasn't that simple, she didn't do it just to... no, that foal was wrong! She...

A trio of loud knocks on her door cut through Krissy's words, snapping the unicorn out of her mental terror. Somepony was here!

Rarity eagerly bolted towards the door and opened it to see Applejack looking exceedingly uncomfortable. "Oh, hello Applejack," Rarity greeted. "How are you today?"

"Hello Rarity," said Applejack.

Her tone was grim. Whatever it was that Applejack wanted to talk to her about, it wasn't good. "What can I do for you?" she asked.

"We're goin' to go see Twilight," said Applejack simply.

Rarity raised her eyebrow at Applejack. "Why darling, why are we doing that?"

"Because she still won't talk to ya and I'm gettin' sick and tired of it!" said the irate farmer.

Rarity took a nervous step back and briefly considered shutting the door on Applejack, but she stood her ground. "Well," said Rarity, hoping to calm Applejack down, "I think that Twilight needs to recover from this in her own time and I don't think that—"

"Don't gimme that!" snapped Applejack. "She's had plenty of time to recover from hearin' the details of somethin' that happened years ago! It's time the two of ya talked about this!"

Rarity flattened her ears and took a step backwards. "Applejack I really don't think that's a good—"

"Rarity, Ah really don't want to force you to go over to her house but I will!" said Applejack sternly.

"Applejack, what's gotten into you?!" asked Rarity. "I don't expect this kind of behavior from you!"

"I'm sorry if Ah'm being forceful, Rarity," said Applejack. "But Ah'm done with seein' you and Twilight interact like this. You two are great friends and she's throwin' it away by not talkin' to you about this!"


"Ah'm not askin' ya, Ah'm tellin' ya," Applejack growled. "If this goes on any longer then our entire group will be affected and if our group splits up, then so do the Elements of Harmony! Ah won't risk either."

Rarity bit her lip. A confrontation with Twilight on Applejack's terms was the very last thing that she wanted right now but there was no way that she was going to get out of it right now. "Very well," said Rarity in a defeated tone. "Lead the way."

As the two walked towards Twilight's house, Applejack started up a preliminary conversation. "Rarity, do you know why she's actin' like this? Ah mean, sure what you told her was doubtlessly disturbin' but why would she avoid you for weeks on end like this for self-defense kills that got out of hoof?"

"I...I don't know," she said. She really hated lying to the Element of Honesty, but the truth wouldn't be the best idea at this point.

"Don't gimme that either," said Applejack. "What could you have said that disturbed her so much? Ah mean, were ya sadistic about it?"

"I was with one of them," said Rarity.

Applejack raised her eyebrow and briefly stopped in her tracks. "You were?" she said. "Like... how sadistic?"

"I buried her alive," said Rarity.

Applejack gasped. "Why would you do that!?" asked Applejack. "What in Equestria possessed you?!"

"Fear," she said sadly. "I was afraid of what would happen if I didn't kill all of them."

"So you buried one alive!?" asked Applejack, clear disgust in her voice.

Rarity frowned at her friend and glanced back to her home. "Maybe this isn't a good idea," she said. "Clearly you understand Twilight's side of things a bit more now."

Applejack resolutely shook her head. "Ah suppose Ah do," she said. "But that still doesn't mean that Ah ain't gonna do my darndest to get this resolved!"

"Applejack," said Rarity sternly, "I'll go do this for you, but you have to promise me one thing!" Applejack glanced at Rarity and nodded glumly. "You will undoubtedly hear parts of the story that you have not heard before, maybe even some... extended ramifications of what happened that day. I want you to Pinkie Promise me that you will not leave until this is resolved for good!"

Applejack silently nodded and the two continued their journey towards Twilight's house. "There's somethin' big you held back, isn't there?" said Applejack.

Rarity nodded. "But Applejack, I want you to know that it is all in the past!" reassured Rarity. "I don't want it to change our friendship!"

"I can't promise that," said Applejack as the library came into view.

"But Applejack—"

"Rarity, like it or not when secrets of this magnitude get let out between friends, their friendship is forever changed. They can still remain best friends, like sisters even, but the friendship will change somehow. Whatever you held back will inevitably change our friendship in some way."

"I'm afraid that it will end it," said Rarity sadly.

"If it is truly in the past, and you are truly sorry for it and wish that you could take it back, then Ah doubt that it will happen," said Applejack.

"You won't hate me for holding it back?" asked Rarity.

"Rarity, when are ya gonna learn that Ah won't hate ya no matter what ya did?" asked Applejack, clear tones of frustration in her voice. "Don't ya trust me?"

"It's not that I don't trust you," said Rarity as they stopped at Twilight's front door. "It's just that you place too much trust in me."

Applejack turned her head away from Rarity at hearing this and she knocked on Twilight's door.

"Coming!" said a happy voice from inside that was undoubtedly that of Twilight. The two waited in an uncomfortable silence for a moment before Twilight opened the door with a gigantic grin on her face.

A gigantic grin that immediately fell when she saw Rarity.

Twilight's eyes widened and the door was engulfed in a magical glow as she attempted to shut the door but Applejack would have none of it and she stopped the door with her hoof.

"Applejack," said Twilight. "What's going on here? Why is she here?"

"She's here because the three of us are gonna talk about what's botherin' you, Twilight!" said Applejack angrily. "If you try to shut the door in our face again Ah'll just buck it down!"

Twilight took a nervous step back. She had rarely seen Applejack so irate. "Uh...come in then I guess," she said, her look clearly indicating that she would rather be anywhere but here.

"Thank you," said Applejack.

Twilight glanced nervously at Rarity but she opened the door wider and allowed the two ponies walked into the house. Rarity and Applejack stood in the middle of the room, followed by Twilight, each wondering who was going to speak up first.

When Applejack realized that it would have to be her, she gave a frustrated sigh. "Before we get goin' on this, Ah think you should know that Rarity told me her big secret."

Twilight's eyes widened, to the point where Rarity was beginning to wonder if they wouldn't encompass her whole face, and her jaw dropped to the floor as she let out a huge gasp. "She told you that—"

"That I killed three foals when I was just a filly," said Rarity quickly, trying to prevent Twilight from spilling the real secret.

Twilight looked confusedly at Rarity. "You didn't tell her that—"

"I buried one of them alive? I actually did," said Rarity. Oh Celestia, Twilight was going to say it at any moment.

"But what about—"

"No, I haven't told her that Sweetie Belle knows too," said Rarity a little loudly.

Now it was Applejack's turn to widen her eyes. "Sweetie Belle knows? How?!" asked Applejack in shock.

Rarity began nervously laughing. She hated lying to the Element of Honesty but it was worth their friendship. However, she had difficulty coming up with a lie for that specific question. "I... uh... well, she found out because... it's a long story," said Rarity.

True to form, Applejack wasn't buying it and she narrowed her eyes at Rarity. "Suppose you tell it," said Applejack sternly. "I think we're gonna be here a while."

They wouldn't be if Rarity had anything to say about it but as fate would have it, she most certainly did not have anything to say about it. Applejack looked at Rarity sternly while Twilight still seemed to be trying to figure out just what was going on.

Her resolve faltered under Applejack's stern gaze and she dejectedly hung her head. "Please," whispered Rarity. "Don't make me tell it." The pain in her voice startled Applejack for a brief moment. "I think that it is a moment that is just between me and Sweetie Belle."

"Does Twilight know how she found out?" asked Applejack.

"Yes I do," said Twilight before Rarity could answer. "And... I think that it is an event that should just be between the two of them."

Rarity breathed a sigh of relief and she smiled weakly. "Thank you, Twilight," she whispered.

Applejack frowned. "Okay, we got that outta the way," she said. "But that wasn't even the real reason we were here in the first place. We're here to talk to you about why you've been avoidin' Rarity on account of what she told you about an event that happened over ten years ago!"

Twilight stayed silent for a moment, looking sadly at Rarity. "You didn't tell her the other part, did you?" she asked quietly. Rarity's stomach tied itself into a million knots as she looked at Twilight with a look of pure horror on her face.

"What 'other part'?" asked Applejack, looking wildly between Rarity and Twilight. Rarity wanted to just run as fast as she could out of Twilight's house. It seemed to her that she would have to if she didn't want her secret spilled to Applejack.

Twilight's jaw tightened and she began blinking away fresh tears. "She can't be a good moderator for our problem if she doesn't really know what's going on."

"But she'll hate me forever!" cried Rarity.

"Rarity, Ah won't—"

"YES YOU WILL!" screeched Rarity, causing Twilight and Applejack to take a step back. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE SECRET IS! I DO, AND I KNOW THAT IT IS UNFORGIVABLE!"

Now Applejack was the one who had to hold back tears while Twilight was shedding hers. "D...Did you kill my parents?" she asked.

Rarity gave a frustrated sigh. "I Pinkie Promise that I had nothing to do with the deaths of your parents!" Rarity groaned. "Stop asking that!"

"Well then what can it be?" asked Applejack, anger rising in her own voice once more. "How can Ah trust you if you don't trust me?"

"Don't you have secrets Applejack?" Rarity shot back. "Don't you have dark memories from your past that you would be mortified if any of us knew?!"

"No Ah don't!" said Applejack. "Ah've done my share of terrible stuff, everypony has, but Ah don't keep any secrets from my friends because Ah trust them!"

Rarity gave a mocking laugh and was surprised to feel tears beginning to creep up as well. "Oh don't be ridiculous, Applejack," said Rarity. "You have secrets just like the rest of us! Everypony has secrets!"

"Fine," snapped Applejack, "Ah have secrets just like the rest of us! But why can't you tell me yours? How can Ah help you if you keep actin' like you've told me when really Twilight knows somethin' ah don't? How can Ah help you two if you won't trust me?!"

For the first time, Rarity saw a look of utter helplessness in Applejack's eyes. To see the farmpony look so vulnerable... she wasn't going to lie, it was somehow frightening.

Applejack took a deep breath and started again. "Ah just... Ah can't stand to see my friends tearin' themselves apart like this. Ah want to help you through this so you can repair some of the obvious damage that this secret, whatever it is, did to yer friendship!"

"Who asked for your help?" she said coldly. Rarity regretted her words immediately and tears began falling from her eyes when she saw the devastated look on Applejack's face. "Oh no," she said in quiet horror. "Applejack I didn't—"

"Oh yeah?" said Applejack as she tried to sound stern through the devastating emotional pain she felt. "Well then just what did—"

"She used to be a serial killer," said Twilight in a hushed whisper. Rarity gave a small gasp of shock and Applejack just stared at Rarity with a look of horror on her face.

"What did you say?" she whispered.

Twilight didn't respond to the question. Rarity and Applejack looked over at her to see her curled up in a ball on the floor, sobbing loudly as if she was a mere filly that was witnessing a hateful argument between her parents. Rarity slowly walked over to her and gently put a comforting hoof on her shoulder, causing Twilight to violently flinch. Rarity lifted the hoof up and the two friends merely stared in silence as Twilight sobbed on the floor, wishing the whole affair would just go away forever.

Applejack looked back at Rarity. "Is that true?" she whispered. "Please, Rarity, please tell me it ain't true."

"It's true," said Rarity.

Applejack put a hoof to her mouth. "Oh Celestia," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "N...No, Rarity, y...you didn't do anythin' like...like that!" Tears fell rapidly from Applejack's face and she began backing away. "Ah know y...you and it... it ain't—"

"Applejack... it's true."

Applejack stared at Rarity, blinking rapidly while tear's streaked down her fur and stained the floor. Her legs began wobbling and before Rarity could do anything, their strength left Applejack and she collapsed on the ground. The second she hit the floor a loud wail escaped her lips and she buried her head in her forelegs, her sobs reverberating throughout the room.

Rarity's own face was stained with tears and she sat down on her haunches. This was it. She had lost two friends now. Applejack's body was convulsing with loud, violent sobs and Twilight had her head in her hooves and was weeping quietly. Rarity tried brushing her own tears away with her foreleg, but it was no use and her body began shaking with sorrow.

"Applejack, I...I'm so sorry," she whimpered. "I'm so sorry that I tricked you into becoming friends with such an evil, evil pony!"

Rarity flattened her ears and slowly walked out of Twilight's home. She shut the door behind her sobs from her two ex-friends still reverberating from the inside. Rarity held back her own tears and began waking; to where? She didn't know. She even considered waking straight out of Ponyville. There was, of course, no guarantee that Applejack wouldn't come to her senses and tell Princess Celesta about what she had done.

Though, it wasn't as though she didn't deserve that.

Rarity's aimless walking soon found her next to the local lake. The sun was shining brightly, reflecting off of the water and warming the entire scene. A few birds chirped a happy song that seemed to mock Rarity as she sat down on the edge of the water. Her tears dripped into the water, creating ripples that spread far out over the lake.

Rarity sniffled and looked down at the pitiful mess that was her reflection. Her gaze hardened as she continued to watch the pony that was looking back at her. "You... you evil pony!" With a snarl she slammed her hoof into her reflection, shattering the image. She continuously pounded the water screaming obscenities and death threats at the pony contained within. "Why did you have to hurt your friends like that?!" she screamed. "Why did you let them get so close to you at all! Why did you have to hurt them like that?!"

Her hoof slammed into the water one final time but her reflection would not dissipate. It continued to exist as long as she was there to look at it. Her face contorted into a snarl. "I WISH YOU WERE DEAD!" she screeched. "If you were dead then you wouldn't hurt my friends any more!"

She breathed heavily as she stared down at the Rarity in the water. Her glare never wavered as the turbulence that she had triggered in the water slowly died down, leaving the lake as still and tranquil as it had been when she arrived. The Rarity in the water continued staring at her real world counterpart, but, to Rarity's surprise, the mouth of the pony in the water split into a wide smile. "Oh, but what you do feels so good, Rarity."

Rarity yelped in shock and quickly backed away from the water. Her reflection dissolved when she broke away from it, but its words continued ringing in he ears.

Because they were true.

Her eye twitched and she let out a mad chuckle. "Oh Celestia, please help me," she muttered to herself. "It just... feels so good."

Her whispers were cut short when she heard a voice behind her calling her name. She wheeled around and to her surprise she saw Twilight and Applejack standing behind her. Both of their eyes were red from crying. Rarity's stomach tightened when she saw that. If she wasn't such an evil pony...

She brushed some of her wet mane aside and sighed. "I assume you are here as a final goodbye before you tell the police to take me away to Celestia's execution chamber?"

Applejack's eyes widened. "N-No, Ah would never do that!"

Rarity let out a weak, humorless chuckle. "Oh? Well I assume you've come to disown me at any rate; kick me out of the group and leave me out in the mud."

Applejack shook her head again. "Rarity Ah would never do that."

Rarity frowned and crossed her forelegs. "What then, you surely aren't coming to say that you want the friendship of a monster like me!"

Applejack's jaw quivered and she took a step forwards. "Rarity... ya ain't a monster," she said quietly.

Rarity stood up and flashed Applejack a glare. "Yes I am!" she cried. "I was a serial killer for almost fifteen years! Do you know what I did to the dozens of ponies I killed?!"

Applejack's mouth dropped and she lifted a hoof to take a step backwards, but she stood her ground. "Rarity... Ah ain't gonna deny that what ya did was evil. Y-You did evil things, but Ah don't want to lose our friendship."

At this the fire in Rarity's eyes faded and she took an uneasy step backwards. "Why?" she whispered.

"Because deep down Ah know that the pony that Ah know and love is the real you. Ah asked Twilight if she...if she knew why you had done those things and she told me all about it." Applejack gave Rarity a comforting smile and took a step forwards. "Ah had no idea that somethin' like that happened to you, sugar cube, but it happened and it came out in the wrong way."

Rarity scoffed. "Understatement of the century," she muttered.

Applejack raised a hoof. "But... Ah know that it'll take me a long time to look past this, Rarity." Her eyes watered once more but she took a deep breath and continued on. "Ah want ta give you another chance. You don't want that life anymore, Rarity, you'd take it all back if ya could, Ah know ya would. Now that it's over Ah want ta give you another chance."

At this Twilight felt up to speaking her peace. "Rarity..." The unicorn turned her gaze to Twilight. "I...I want to apologize for how I ignored you. It was wrong to treat you like that when you came to me for help because you felt terrible about past mistakes. I..." Twilight took a deep breath. "I want to give you another chance too."

Rarity's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "B...But I don't deserve one!" she wailed.

Both Applejack and Twilight smiled and shook their heads. "Of course you don't," said Twilight.

"But that's one of the biggest jobs of a friend: forgiveness," said Applejack simply.

Rarity stared at her two friends for a moment before her emotions completely overtook her and she collapsed on the ground, sobbing hysterically. Twilight and Applejack rushed over to her and both wrapped her into a hug. Applejack stroked her mane. "Shh, it's alright, sugar cube, it'll be okay. Ah don't know how or when, but it'll be okay."

Rarity continued to cry until there were no more tears to shed.

Author's Note:

Rarity confronting herself.

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