They Really Exist! I Swear!
Starlight Glimmer glared at Trixie, who was currently nesting in a hollowed-out divot in Applejack’s orchard. She nudged the blue mare, who snorted, stirred, and looked up at Starlight.
“Hmwha?” Trixie eloquently asked.
Starlight raised an eyebrow. “I looked all over town for you. What are you doing here?”
“Hmm.” Trixie shook the cobwebs out of her brain and stretched. “I was just taking a nap in my nap hole.”
Starlight raised her eyebrow harder. “Nap… hole?”
“Yeah.” Trixie rubbed her face. “My nap hole.” She looked up at Starlight. “Where’s yours?”
“I don’t have a nap hole,” Starlight said.
Trixie sighed as she stood up. “That’s not good.” She put a hoof on Starlight’s shoulder. “Your nap hole will get moldy if you don’t use it.”
Starlight blinked a few times, then pushed Trixie’s hoof off. “… I don’t have a nap hole to collect mold in.”
Trixie grunted. “That’s because you neglected it and it’s now a mold hole.”
“Trixie I—” Starlight cut herself off and took a deep breath, then looked Trixie straight in her sleepy eyes. “Trixie. I don’t have a nap hole or a mold hole.”
“That’s silly,” Trixie said with a snort. “Everyone has a nap hole.” She looked to the side. “Except for those who neglect them. Then they become mold holes.”
Starlight rubbed her head and groaned. “Trixie, you’re great—”
“And powerful!”
“And powerful, yes.” Starlight nodded. “But no one has a nap hole.” She put a hoof to her chest. “At least I’ve never had a nap hole.” Starlight waved in Trixie’s direction. “I think that’s just a you thing.”
Trixie bit her lip and looked around. “Um… uh…” she blurted before a savior caught her eye and a smile caught her face. “Hey, Applejack!” she shouted while waving, presumably at Applejack who just happened to be in her own orchard.
The sharp crack of hooves hitting wood reverberated through the air. “Yeah, Trixie?” Applejack shouted through the expanse.
“Tell Starlight about your nap hole!”
Another crack vibrated across the expanse. “What?”
“Your nap hole!”
Crack. “I don’t have a nap hole!”
Starlight pursed her lips at Trixie while the latter blushed. “Trixie, there’s no such thing as nap holes.”
Trixie grunted, then put both of her hooves on Starlight’s shoulders. “You’re blind to the reality of nap holes.”
“No, Trixie, I’m not blind to the reality of nap holes,” Starlight said as she pushed Trixie off of her again.
“You’ve shielded your worldview from nap holes!” Trixie said as she grimaced and pointed an accusing hoof at Starlight.
“No, Trixie, I think you’re just being dumb. Also you’re practically repeating yourself.”
“I am not being dumb, Starlight!” Trixie stomped towards Starlight until they were face to face, their muzzles nearly touching. “And I am repeating myself to hammer in that you are shielding yourself from reality!”
Starlight grimaced. “I swear if you say—”
“To the reality of nap holes, of course!”
Starlight groan-screamed and stomped away over towards Applejack, who was still bucking trees at a steady clip.
She poked Applejack, who turned around and smiled. “Hey there, Starlight, what can I do you for?”
Starlight sat down and rubbed her face. “Mmh… I think I have poor taste in friends sometimes.”
Applejack exhaled, then pursed her lips and rubbed her chin. “Now, whatever would give you such an impression?”
“The, uh,” Starlight said as she looked over in Trixie’s direction, Trixie somehow figuring out a way to preen herself despite being a unicorn. “Nap hole thing, I guess.”
“Hmm.” Applejack placed her hoof down. “Yeah, I thought that was a bit odd when Trixie called over here asking me about nap holes.” She whistled. “Ain’t never heard of such a thing. What d’you reckon they are?”
Starlight clenched her jaw. “I don’t know, but I’m guessing it’s an excuse Trixie came up with because she lost her… no, wait, there she is picking up her keys.” She shook her head and grunted. “I don’t know then.” Starlight waved a hoof. “Something Trixie made up to get me peeved.”
“Watch your mouth there, Starlight.” Applejack snickered. “Don’t want Apple Bloom hearing such filth.”
“I just…”
Starlight exhaled.
Applejack sat down and put a hoof on Starlight’s shoulder. “Have you ever considered that the nap hole is… a metaphor?”
Starlight glanced at Applejack. “… W-what?”
“A metaphor.” Applejack nodded.
“For what?” Starlight said as a sneer formed on her lips.
Applejack looked around. “Now, I may not have the same book-learnin’ as some of my other friends, but I know ponies, and my guess is that Trixie’s insistence on you accepting the existence of the nap hole is a cry for help from the deepest recesses of her soul.” She bowed her head. “A yearning that you accept her for her being the pony that she is, no ifs, ands, or buts.” Applejack then looked Starlight square in the eyes. “The nap hole is a metaphor for friendship.”
Starlight looked at Applejack. Then she looked at Trixie, who had managed to produce her hat and cape from Celestia-knows-where. Then she looked back at Applejack.
“Applejack, I gotta be honest. That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard.”
Applejack chuckled. “It is, ain’t it?” She stood up, pulling Starlight up with her as well. “Th’point is she is being dumb, but that don’t change nothing. That’s what friendship is.”
Starlight gave Applejack a cock-eyed stare. “So, friendship is… dumb?”
“Not exactly how I’d put it, no. More like….” Applejack looked around, seemingly searching for the right words. She apparently found them in short order. “Accepting that your friends can be dumb, and that’s what makes them special.”
“That sounds really—”
Applejack shoved her in the direction of Trixie. “Now go tell her about your nap hole!”
“I don’t have a nap hole!” Starlight shouted back at Applejack.
“Then make one up!”
Starlight grumbled under her breath as she ambled towards The Great and Powerful Trixie, who was busy dusting herself off.
She noticed Starlight and gave her a devilish smirk. “Are you finally ready to accept the Great and Powerful reality of the nap hole?”
Starlight looked at Trixie.
Make one up, Applejack said.
She looked at Trixie, who was clearly waiting for a response in the affirmative. But she didn’t have a nap hole. Nap holes were dumb.
Then hers and Applejack’s words repeated themselves in her head.
Friendship is dumb.
The nap hole is a metaphor for friendship.
Starlight took a breath, then hugged Trixie tightly.
“You’re my nap hole, Trixie.”
Trixie paused for a moment, then returned the hug just as tightly as Starlight gave it.
You may be kind of dumb, but you’re still my friend, and I wouldn’t give that up for anything in the world.
“I nap hole you too, Starlight.”
Scratch that. Really dumb.
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8761630
Man you guys are getting quick on the draw here.
This was lovely
Thanks for writing it!
why just why man
8761640
Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it!
8761648
I think you’ll like what you find.
8761650
Because nap holes.
This is only partially my fault.
I’ll have to read this when Im not between napholes
8761653
I love you too, Kami.
Trixie has lost it.
8761655
Just partially.
8761660
Maybe she’s found it.
8761635
Quick on the draw about what?
I thought "goddammit Syeekoh" was just the way we told you that we enjoyed the yarn you shared with us. Have I erred?
8761710
No, I agree that it’s a way to express enjoyment of a story.
I just like it when it’s early or first in the comments section, is all.
This really is as in character, as coherent, and as tolerable as an episode featuring only Starlight, Trixie and Applejack could possibly be.
Damn it all.
8761767
I’m glad you approve.
Trixie’s WHAT hole?
Oh. Wait. Not that kind of story.
Really funny though!
8761801
I’m glad you enjoyed it.
A few changed up words here and there and this could have easily been rated T.
Well done.
Dammit, that was gonna be my comment on the story! Now I got nothin'!
8761822
What? It’s just about Trixie’s nap hole. Nothing lewd about that.
8761823
AHAHA Beat you to the punch!
8761824
Mhm. Yeah. Sure.
Cool
This site needs more stories about nap holes. And Starlight is wrong nap holes are a thing, I use my nap hole all the time.
Unless there is a true thing of a nap hole
8761839
Glad you like it.
8761856
8761869
Oh yeah nap holes are totally a thing.
Don’t let Applejack’s and Starlight’s ignorance of nap holes get to you.!
8761875
Yay
sigh...
Thanks for being our nap hole, Majin Syeekoh.
8761886
No problem, man.
Try telling Spike and his girlfriend their make out barrel.
I need to make my nap hole comfier...
8762025
We all do.
We all do.
aw I really wanted Trixie tgap™ to use those keys
This was surprisingly sweet. I enjoyed this.
That was funny
Nap hole sounds like a giant hole you take a nap in. Like hibernation.
That ending gets a d'aww from me.
D'awwww
What happens if someone plugs your nap hole, though?
8762338
Then you either unplug it or cut your losses and find a new nap hole.
It's good to see my agony manifested into fic form through the magic of goddamnit syeekoh.
...On that note, Goddamnit, Syeekoh.
8762374
mmmm
keep bringing that Goddammity goodness
Fun, cute, and very, very silly. Great read
8762408
Thanks.
DOES SHE STUFF STARLIGHT IN HER TIGHT AND COZY NAP HOLE???
YES/NO
8762745
No.
8762749
derpicdn.net/img/view/2018/2/27/1666858__safe_edit_edited+screencap_screencap_sunset+shimmer_driving+miss+shimmer_equestria+girls_spoiler-colon-eqg+series_blushing_cropped_eyes+closed.jpeg
8762758
Oh my god that image is everywhere and it’s so creepy.
8762772
68.media.tumblr.com/15e1963c69df4481427e381f88ca401a/tumblr_p4s0a787YF1rchl9qo1_1280.jpg
8762772
I never saw that till now, but yes that pic is all kinds of creepy. Btw, awesome and adorable fic.
"And then, she was going on about 'Nap Holes'. I think I got that cleared out, more or less, but... honestly! I mean, have you ever heard of anything like that?" Starlight was giggling a bit as she related the tale to her teacher, mentor, and first real friend after her bout with-- she could admit it these days-- experimenting with Evil Overlordship.
Twilight nodded. "The term is really self-explaining, of course. She was obviously using it as a metaphor for friendship."
Starlight blinked. "Um... well, yes, and you figured that out really quick--"
"That, or an extra-dimensional aperture leading to a personal subspace used primarily for the purpose of napping when unable to get to ones bed."
The unicorn stared, dumbstruck, at the alicorn. "A what."
"Oh, yes. In theory, universal to ponies, but in practice, barely a vestigial pocket. Ponies have mostly evolved beyond the need for them. You'll really only find them used by those who, well, can charitably be called dumb."
"Bwah."
"Honestly, probably for the best. Equinothropologically, they tended to collect mold. Very unsanitary."
"You scare me sometimes."
Twilight shrugged. "I'm used to that nowadays."
8761658
Don't you mean... you nap hole Kami?
That moment when I am smart and still end up being the Tricia of my group of friends