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the Equine Orphans

I’m sorry for any grammar or language mistake. This is my first trial to actually write something in English, and I only got 5.5 in the IELTS test…
The story is inspired by the game ‘Children of a dead earth’, but this is not a crossover story. Hope you would enjoy, and any comments are welcomed.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 3 )

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Naiba

Naiba #1 · Feb 21st, 2018 · · ·

You know, a propper hard scifi rocketpunk combat fic might be pretty interesting set in equestria with the history of how it came to be fleshed out properly.

Still, You really could do with an editor and a little more time researching the physics of it.

An unguided projectile attack on a spacecraft with FIFTY HOURS of warning is compleately useless. The 2000km altitude around, what is presumably, an earth sized/massed world is reasonably low. you could make over twenty full orbits of the planet in that time.

Skyson

Skyson #2 · Feb 21st, 2018 · · ·

8750012
Thanks for pointing out.
What I was trying to say in the story is that the enemy (mentioned as zebras) is creating a large range of bullets, which has took in the consideration of any possibility of evading already, in assumption that the two ships have equally powerful computers (which is another reason why ponies are doing nothing but being targeted).
And, my original setting was that the kinetic energy of the bullet is enough to tear the ship apart, so the bullet will be actual ‘stones’ that contains no explosives and will be very light... until I watched a video about an astronaut fixing a hole on ISS created by a space trash. Anyway, thanks for commenting.
And, if you don’t mind, could you tell me something about the editors in this site? Is it okay to send every work to them?
Because when I was writing in Chinese, the editor is a really ‘fancy’ service dedicated to the published books, but not people writing online, and I only have a very vague idea about them.

Obsi