Chapter One: In the Void
Chapter One: In the Void
In the place known as The Void, there were two beings that floated aimlessly through the vast emptiness of the realm. A demon like creature with white and purple skin with horns and a long tail floated there in anger. In the world of fiction he was known as the Evil Emperor Frieza, a tyrannical space alien that ruled over the entire universe in the Dragonball series, but he wasn’t him. He was just a normal guy named Jack and he wasn’t a fan of this huge change, but what he found to be more annoying than floating aimlessly through the void was floating aimlessly with someone he found to be the most annoying person in his entire life.
“How come we aren’t somewhere yet!? For f**ks sake!” An auburn haired girl screamed in irritation. This girl, the bane of his existence, was Kotone Shiomi, formerly known as Audrina.
“If I knew the answer, then we would actually be somewhere you imbecile!” He shouted in anger as he folded his arms and looked away from her. Audrina was a huge fan of the earlier Persona games, and dressed as the female protagonist of the third game. She had been Jack’s only friend, and he hers.
“Aww, you’re just mad that I’m talking to myself instead of you.” She said in a playfully mocking tone, a late sign of Audrina losing her sanity.
“Hmpf… Say all the snarky remarks all you want, but understand this Audrey? If I could actually use these powers that Frieza used in the show, I would use them to seal that mouth of yours shut!” He shouted as he reiled around and showed his fist to her, but it didn’t frighten her. “Just remember this is your fault to begin with! You just had to buy those stupid medals from that man!”
“You told me to! You said ‘go buy something’, which was your way of saying bug off!” Audrina hissed back, “Plus, how was I supposed to know that magic is real!?”
“As if! You were the one who was like ‘Oh, come on Jack, let’s buy something together. As a momento for our last year at Comic Con!’ you dolt!” Jack growled as he turned away from her once more as the two continued to argue through the void.
“Yeah, by the way, you’re the one who wanted to go in the first place! Why wouldn’t I want something cool from the biggest gathering of dorks!?” Audrina’s voice cracked as if she were going through a puberty spike.
“Ha! It takes a dork to know one! And if I recall that was only one of the places I wanted to spend our last year! I knew we should have just gone with going to the pool! But no! You said you wanted something the treasure our friendship!” He shouted before placing his hand over his face and groaned.
“Yeah, well you know that smell chlorine makes!? Guess what, it’s not chlorine it’s pee! I would rather have you shut me up then have to swim through that putrid liquid!” Audrina faked gagging.
Jack could only growl as he continued to try his best to look away from his face, but when floating in an empty vacuum, it can be very difficult. The had remained silent for the time being, before he finally sighed and turned back to her. “Look, Audrey I know you had nothing to do with this, but right now. I just want to undo all of this and get things back to the way they were before. So I’m………...sorry.”
Audrina began to grin. “Sorry, what was that~?”
Jack could only groan before turning away from her. “Grr… I’m… Sor... ry.” He growled in response, he didn’t like it when she did this to him, but then again, she was the only one who actually wanted to be friends with him.
“Swaray?” Audrina’s grin widened.
“Keep this up and the moment I find a way out of this place, I’m leaving you behind!” He shouted in anger, but despite the jokes and teasing, she knew he was sorry. But before they could say anything else, Jack noticed something off in the distance that peaked his interest. “Hey Audrey do you see that?”
“Uh… I think so!”
“It looks like gate or something? Maybe that’s our way home?” He questioned, sure it was a long shot, but they were willing to do anything to get back home.
“Or it’s a trap…” Countered Audrina.
“It isn’t a trap… If it was then don’t you think we’d know? We’re literally the only ones floating in this godforsaken place!” He argued, before floating over there. “Don’t you want to go home?”
“Yes, but…” There was clear hesitation on her face. But he knew she’d follow him either way if it meant they could return to and find a way to get back to normal.
“No buts! We’re going and that’s final!” Audrina huffed, but followed his lead as the two landed a few feet from the gateway. Jack could hardly wait to turn back to normal and get back at the old man for putting him and his friend there in the first place. “Let’s hope that I’m right about this and your wrong.”
“When have you ever been right?” Audrina’s smugness was insurmountable.
All the frost demon could do was growl at her response, and simply walked through it without a second thought, but what happened next was something neither of them were expecting. “What the AHHHHH!!!!!!!”
They began to fall.
It was just a normal day in Equus as Princess Celestia sat upon her throne room, dealing with her nephew, Prince Blueblood once more. He began complaining that common ponies shouldn’t be allowed on castle grounds and it began to irritate her slightly, but she dare not speak these things. She had to keep up appearances, as breaking any ties to royalty could mean somepony far more intelligent and manipulative could take Blueblood’s place and vie for power in a dangerous game.
So humoring a moron like him wouldn’t be a problem. “Very well, Blueblood. I’ll see what I can do.” Celestia groaned under her breath.
“Thank you and be sure to tell Sunset and her friends that they also must dress appropriately when entering the castle.” He added before the guards began to escort him out.
“You’re not gonna do it? Are you, your majesty?” One of her guards asked once the Prince was out of sight.
“Of course not, but Blueblood needs to think he has some power with me.” Celestia replied. “He doesn’t understand how ruling a nation works… What’s next on the list?” Celestia usually felt comfortable acting like herself in front of her guards and most staff. She was obviously still motherly, but she was less stiff when it was just them. She knew she could trust them, and it was a warm feeling to have.
“Well, so far, there have been complaints about Blueblood’s attitude and Princess Luna wishes to meet with you later this evening, before you have to set the sun.” Her guard explained before bowing his head.
“Did Luna tell you why she wants to speak?” Celestia asked, raising an eyebrow. She’d figure out a way to tone Blueblood down another time, her sister rarely interacted with her outside of their breakfast/dinner times or events, the latter of which Celestia usually orchestrated for that exact reason.
“Yes, she wants to talk about having a pupil of her own for the nights as well. Figured she’d have something besides dream watching to keep her occupied. But besides that, there isn’t much else really.” He replied before hoofing over the scroll to her. Celestia took the scroll in her magic and began reading in. “But that is still hours away, so dealing with the complaints about Blueblood should be your priority right now.”
Celestia groaned internally. She had been putting it off, but then again, who wouldn’t? “Very well. But it isn’t royal duties, I’ll do it in my own free time.” The Princess of the day felt like she’d regret that, as free time was precious to her. But in the end, she’d already heard Blueblood ranting for an hour and a half.
“If you say so your majesty… I’ll leave the partition to ban Blueblood from Canterlot on your desk… Again.” He said, groaning as he also signed it.
Contrary to popular belief, Blueblood did give Canterlot benefits financially. Anyone other than Blueblood being in charge would mean a-
Celestia’s mind fuzzed up. Politics, after a full day of mind numbing work, scrambled her brain. “I’m sorry, but I will look for a solution to make him more tolerable.”
“Very well…” Her guard replied before exiting the throne room.
The day was nearly over, and Celestia had made her sister and herself breakfast/dinner.
“Hello, Celestia… I take it your doing well?” Princess Luna said sternly.
“Well enough, Lulu.” Celestia smiled warmly at her sister as she placed a plate on pancakes on either side of the table. “So, you want a student like I have, am I right?”
“Yes, some company during the night would be most appreciated… It would be better than being alone.” She said, glaring at Celestia. “Would be better than having you there.”
Celestia flinched. It was almost unnoticeable, but it was there. “Well, if you’re sure you can handle the responsibility, then I’m sure you’ll excel. Perhaps an older student...?” The solar Princess’ mind wandered. It did that quite often as of late, and it concerned her somewhat. ‘Maybe my age is catching up with me...’
Celestia finally returned to reality, yawning. “Oh who am I foaling, you’ll be able to figure things out with Kibitz’ help. I had him transferred to night duty…” Celestia stated, however her smile began falling. “And based on how you’re acting, I should dispose of the breakfast I made, or you’d rather eat anywhere but here.”
“I’m fine, you don’t have to waste it.” She said quietly, but Celestia was still able to hear her. “Thank you for the food, Celestia, but I think it’s time that I raise the moon.
Celestia’s ears folded to her skull. “Alright. I’ll leave it out for when you’re done.” The elder sister said. She knew Luna still resented her, and she’d let Luna resent her for however long she needed. Celestia understood that time may not heal the scars of the past, but she’d be there for her sister no matter what. “If you need me at all, you know where I’ll be resting.”
By the time Celestia had walked out of the room, Luna couldn’t help but sigh before turning to the glass window to gaze at her moon. “Sleep tight… Sister… But be aware that I haven’t forgiven you.”
Audrina looked around at their surroundings, looking unsurprised. “Welp, I’m sure we aren’t home. Looks a bit cartoonish. Called it!”
“Mfph!” Jack muffled as Audrina had landed on top of him.
“You’re right, I am amazing!” She said before she was abruptly thrown off of Jack.
“I said get off me you idiot!” He shouted as he began to dust himself off, slamming his tail against the ground. “I think you need to start laying off the sweets fatass!”
“Look who’s talking? At least I look good, you look like Lord Voldemort got his cranium replaced with an eggplant and then learned that he had skin cancer!”
“Wow, that was so insulting. They should give you an award for not only having the biggest butt, but also having the tiniest brain in existence.” He retorted as he glared up at her, clenching his fists tightly.
“Hey, I heard guys like them big~! But yeah, you’re just jealous.” Audrina wasn’t insulted at all. Her tone of voice, in fact, told Jack that she was confident in her brain’s capabilities.
“Even if you are right about… That, you are in fact wrong about me being jealous. You were wrong about that gate being a trap. We’re still walking freely, we aren’t in a cage. So if anything I’m right!” Jack said, looking away from his friend as Audrey had a sly grin on her face.
“Then why’s the night sky purple?”
“Grr… That’s not the point of this argument! I was right about this not being a trap, your wrong and have a fat ass that almost suffocated me! So tell me who’s the one wrong here?” He asked with a smirk across his face as Audrina glared at the frost demon.
“You said it’d lead us home, not that it wasn’t a trap! And this isn’t home, therefore someone wanted up here, and you fell for their trick! So I’m right!” Audrina countered. “Where are we then, oh great superior!?”
“If your gonna continue to act like this, then I’m leaving your big butt behind.” He said as he began to walk off as Audrina began to follow him in a laid back manner. “Now if your gonna continue to make smug remarks, why don’t you explain where we are? Since your so insistent on being right?”
“I’d say… based on the sky, we’re in some kind of cartoon dimension.” She speculated.
“Well bravo! You figured it out! I didn’t know that we were in a bloody damned cartoon world!!!” He shouted at the top of his lungs. “You clearly don’t know where the hell we are, but I’m certain that once we make our way to the village down this mountain, we should be able to get the answers we need.”
“Oh my god I know what cartoon we’ve entered...! I think!” She said, staring at a city on another mountain.
“You think or you know?” He asked. “It isn’t that complicated.”
“Well I’m sure I’m right, but I’ve never seen Canterlot from this angle…”
“Now what in hell are you talking about now?” He asked, raising a brow at his subordinate- friend. He meant friend.
“Canterlot, the capital city of Equestria… the country focused on in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.” Audrina said, her voice dying with each word.
“You mean to tell me we’re in that ridiculous cartoon that you love so much? Can’t believe this is happening.” He said with disgust as he continued to walk down the mountain to the small village. Jack was never a huge fan of the franchise, unlike Audrey, she would girl out whenever she watched a brand new episode and he had to sit and watch with her cause his favorite show, Dragon Ball Super would be on next.
“Yours is ridiculous…” Audrina muttered.
“Say what you want… My show isn’t boring and expects the ‘Power of Friendship’ to save the entire world. Complete garbage if you ask me.” He said bluntly.
“Yes, and a bunch of men grunting while one of the villains is a hairless cat that deserves to be considered a furry isn’t…?”
“Take that back. He could literally vaperize this pony world in an instant if he wanted. Besides none of them would last ten seconds against a god.” He rebutted as the two continued to argue down the mountain.
“MLP has a god! His name is Discord, voiced by a Star Trek actor! He could beat you easily, even at a final form!”
“I doubt that seriously… I don’t think making it rain chocolate milk and making me act the complete opposite of myself as godlike! Besides if I recall, he only claimed himself to be a spirit of chaos. Nothing more and nothing less and if I knew how to transform, don’t you think I would have done it by now? Now if we’re done arguing about which show is better? How about we actually make some progress and get the hell out of here already!!!” He ordered, slapping his friend across the head with his hand as Audrey began to rush down the mountain with Jack continuously hitting her behind.
“I hate you!” Audrey cried.
This is my new story and this is probably gonna get a lot of dislikes, but I don't care! It was fun to write with my friend. And I hope you'll get some laughs from it as well. This series is gonna go on for quite sometime. XD
Brony Parasite is Co-Author to this story and is the owner of Audrey who was cosplaying Kotone Shiomi.
Jack is owned by me who was turned into Frieza
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Noice
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Well this looks promising.
This is great!!
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Thanks
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Well I hope you look forward to what we have planned
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Thanks! XD
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Ah, that will be the test of time, and other quotes I don't know who said them
FYI, great writers and comedians don't write up a script or anything like that. Rather, they get into the mindset for jokes. I suggest reading a comedic story to put your mind in 'the zone'. I the stories that I find myself laughing to the hardest are 60's Era Spiderman goes to Equestria, Saxton Hale in Ponyville (this is more of a inside joke, get acuainted to TF2 if ya wanna know more), Celestial Disposition, and The Mighty Warrior of Epicness (this one I highly recommend due to a coherent story line yet still being funny, plus sequels). In writing a humors story make, sure that it is right for a characters reaction and if it is the right kind of commedy (ie: cringe comedy is not for the cringe itself but for others reactions to said cringe, slapstick humor that does no damage anyone or personal/treasured objects). I deeply hope that this helps you in the long run.
BTW, Ponkers (Pinkie) is already demanding a party chapter, yes you read that right, a whole chapter dedicated to her party (just make it with plenty of Pinkie's antics. If ya need any help with the story don't be afraid to ask me.
)
Also...
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, just don't let Ponkers know about it, I love her to pieces [like the sister I never had] but she can be... loud... at times, very loud)
(pss. Listening to music can also help, like Spazzmatic Polka for example
*snirk* To late you sill-filly!
... dare I ask, how?
*hehe* My face was smiling, it's right next to the 'for example'! Now... OooOO! What is this song?...
Oh merde
Why didn't I ever hear this song before, it's super duper fun! I will sure that you have the bestist, funnist smilyisterist party in the history of parties, I have so many creatures to invite like... wait... why are their tags of sex, gore, and violence. As long as you don't hurt my friends and in only small doses, then why not! *squee*
Also, *Pinkie loses all joy from her face, her hair goes limp, a devilish grin crosses her face, ear to ear, that would both outdo and frighten Jeff the Killer himself*even though Smile HD never happened or will EVER happen, that was basically me being happy while cranked up on the kookoo scale even if it was sick, twisted, and cruel, you do NOT want to see me fucking pissed and determined to make your life a living HELL, in this dimension (along with countless others) you may think Discord is all powerful, but remember those you truly need to fear Jack. Make sure to keep him in line Jiren, or else you might no longer have Jake as a 'character' in your 'stories' if you catch my drift.
*Pinkie immediately poofs back up to her normally giddy and bubbly self* Though I'm sure that with enough time Jack will appreciate the magic of friendship and become really, REALLY fun to hang out with! Not as fun as me, but definitely were you're not such a sourpuss. Auntie Pinkie's got ya covered with her special deluxe party! *GASPS* HEY! Maybe I for the party I can put of the decorations in the color and theme of-
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*sigh* I'm sorry, Ponkers tends to do that when meeting new... extremely violent... people. I (being the great and merciful being that I am) spared you of her rant before she started to give spoilers for the future she wants to happen.
I apologize on her behalf, mostly because I'm not cannon to this story and she KNOWS not to mess with the authors works unless extremely important matters pop up
Ah... Boo! Wait... merciful? You signed up with panic and pain in your name, silly!
PINKIE! SHH! Quick Spidy! Distraction -->
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Thanks man.
Dude, really? Using me?
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Also
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I'm excited to see this next chapter! Hopefully it's getting close.
You have peaked my interest dear sir why?
First Frieza is my absolute favorite villain from Dragon Ball Z or Dragon Ball super in this case since you are using a character from DbS as your profile picture, still favorite baddie.
Finally I just love the interaction between these two characters it's just got me hooked much like how a certain show got me hooked eh eh?
Looking forward to the next chapter.
...you've got a serious problem with "Your" and "You're"...
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Now I didn't write the first two chapters, it was written by The Mad Titan, I only took over the story.