11
11
Apple Bloom emerged from her room in a stupor. She had never slept in a castle before, and the sheer scale and majesty of it all left her feeling perpetually worried she would break things just by staring at them. Gone were the rustic surroundings of her youth, replaced by a world where even the most mundane features were masterfully-crafted works of art. The walls were expertly built and decorated. Everything was made of imported stone or wood, or precious metals and gems. Apple Bloom was sure even a single bathroom fixture of her private bathroom could feed her family of four for a year!
It all would have been too overwhelming to sleep, but the bed had been the single most comfortable thing she had ever laid on. As soon as her head hit the pillow she was out. Her dreams had been a turbulent mess of discomfort and panic before settling into a scene that almost seemed real if not for the impossible height of her surroundings and superiors. Apple Bloom was small, almost insignificantly so, and absolutely filthy. Her hooves were caked in dried mud, her coat unwashed and dusty, her mane a tangled mess. Eyes downcast she tried to maneuver around towering decorations yet still managed to bump into them, threatening them to fall over and break…
“You shouldn’t be here,” a haughty unicorn that stood ten times her height declared, looking down on her with distaste, “this is no place for simple folk.”
“I-I’m sorry,” Apple Bloom muttered, hurrying on. More decorations, more threatening wobbles, more disdainful unicorns.
“You’re quite clumsy, aren’t you?” Celestia had said. Apple Bloom could not see her entirely, her body stretching into the heavens; looking upon her face was like looking into the sun itself and she shielded her eyes. “How did I ever expect you to solve a problem I couldn’t handle?”
Apple Bloom felt worthless, dirty, and unattractive. What was she doing there? Who was she kidding? This was a job for some pony better than her; she was just a simple farm filly trying to live in her sister’s shadow. She didn’t even know how to move around a fancy bedroom!
Apple Bloom didn’t realize she was crying until a voice snapped her out of her despair.
“Apple Bloom…” it whispered from high above.
Straining to look up into the impossibly-high face of Celestia, she saw that the face had been replaced with the gentle light of the moon and that it was night. The titan of Celestia was merely an ancient colossus, nothing but stone. As Apple Bloom looked around, she saw only ruins of majesty where once there had been fragile beauty. Now it was collapsed, but no less majestic – a reliquary of ancient grace, glowing in the pale moonlight. Princess Luna descended from the heavens and landed behind her, starry mane flowing and eyes all-but-glowing in the night.
“What is wrong, child?” she asked, eyes startlingly concerned for her wellbeing.
“P-Princess!” Apple Bloom curtsied low, “I-it’s nothing; just a dream.”
“Arise, young Apple Bloom,” Luna smiled, but it was a thin veil, “Dreams are not nothing. They are gateways into the soul. One can learn a great many things from what they dream about.”
“What am I supposed to learn from this?” Apple Bloom gestured around at the ruins.
“That beauty is everlasting,” Luna noted, walking around the statue, “that even gods can turn out to be false. Or perhaps it is symbolic that fragile decadence will ultimately collapse and be forgotten…”
Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow at the alicorn’s analysis. She was smart, but still just a filly; a lot of that went over her head, but it didn’t sound entirely reassuring for her mental state.
“You feel out of place in Canterlot, yes?” Luna asked, suddenly, “As if you don’t… fit in?”
“Yeah,” Apple Bloom said, simply.
“You struggle to live up to the example of your heroic older sister,” Luna stated rather than asked, eyes fixed on the headless colossus of Celestia, “Failing to do so makes you feel…”
“Worthless,” Apple Bloom finished, still taking in the desolation. Luna had been right; even ruined, the castle was beautiful. In ruins, though, it was no longer intimidating, and only then did the filly realize she was clean again.
“Yes…” Luna mumbled, then snapped back to the moment, “Well, never fear, Apple Bloom. You do belong; my sister is quite inclusive. Oh, and do not worry about breaking anything. Accidents happen.”
“Even to you?” Apple Bloom asked.
“W-well…” Luna thought back to the other morning where, half-asleep, she had bumped into a collection of statues and sent them all shattering to the ground, “Y-yes, I suppose even to me.”
“I just don’t want to be an embarrassment…” the young filly sighed.
“Your sister is immeasurably proud of you, Apple Bloom,” Luna spared a more favorable look at the headless statue, “Besides, we have restoration magic; if anything is broken, it can be repaired.”
Apple Bloom smiled at the memory of the dream. If anything is broken, it can be repaired...
Despite that, the filly still watched her footing as she traversed the halls of the castle. In time she made her way to the dining room. She stopped dead in her tracks at the sight before her. Seeing either Princess alone was awe-inspiring enough, and seeing two was simply phenomenal. Seeing Princess Celestia cooking pancakes, though, really took the proverbial cake. Yet the greatest shock were the two stallions seated across from a tired Luna and next to a wary Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo – two stallions Apple Bloom thought she’d never see again.
“Flim?” she asked, drawing all eyes, “Flam? What in Equestria are you two doing here?”
“They,” Sweetie Belle gestured to the twins, sardonically, “are our Cutie Mark problem.”
“Oh boy…” Apple Bloom sighed, taking her seat next to Luna and giving her a thankful smile. The exhausted Princess gave a tired smile in return. “So… how was Yakyakistan?”
Celestia almost choked on her drink trying not to laugh while Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo exchanged questioning looks. The twins looked suitably abashed, which relieved Apple Bloom; maybe there was some hope for them yet.
“It was very cold,” Flim said, quickly, but his brother didn’t follow up in their usual pattern.
Apple Bloom noted that with curiosity but chose to focus on eating her pancakes. Her and her friends were very vocal about how delicious the meal was, which the Princess of the Day took as high praise.
“Tia is an excellent cook, right brother?” Flim asked.
“Indubitably!” Flam agreed, avoiding looking at Celestia.
“Charmers,” Celestia murmured into her drink, not smiling. The fillies suddenly felt a tension in the air, but decided to ignore it.
“So…” Scootaloo decided to focus on their job as breakfast was wrapping up, “I’m going to venture a guess and say you two are having trouble figuring out what your Cutie Marks mean, right?”
“Wonderfully astute, little pegasus filly,” Flam nodded, happy to be distracted from his Sunday cinema fiasco, “My brother and I have never really been able to determine what they mean, exactly!”
“Interesting…” Sweetie Belle rubbed her chin. The last time they had a case like this was Diamond Tiara, but even she knew what her talent was – she just didn’t know how best to use it.
“It’s probably best if you start from the beginning,” Apple Bloom suggested.
“And I should get some sleep,” Luna politely excused herself and left the table, “Enjoy your stay in Canterlot, Crusaders. Let me know if you want to talk.”
“Bye Luna!” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle waved after her, surprising each other and Apple Bloom.
“That’s a might bit informal, don’t you think?” the farm filly asked.
“Sorry,” Scootaloo chuckled, sheepishly, “she helped me with a problem a long time ago and she’s just so nice…”
“Same with me, actually,” Sweetie Belle noted.
“Huh, me too,” Apple Bloom said.
“My sister takes great pride in personally helping her subjects in their dreams,” Celestia explained, “She keeps an extensive dream journal detailing every pony’s dreams and nightmares, though she’s the only one I know who’s ever read it.”
“It’s nice that she goes the extra mile like that,” Apple Bloom smiled, unaware the comment made Celestia’s eye twitch in minor annoyance.
“Yeah, it must be hard for you Princesses to get around and talk to us every day ponies…” Scootaloo agreed.
“There are a lot of responsibilities,” Celestia said, simply, “I believe you said something about starting from the beginning? I should leave you five to it, then.”
Celestia left the three fillies and two stallions alone. Big Mac had already come and gone, and Celestia had delighted in the awkwardly stilted breakfast he’d shared with Luna before quickly departing. He was still around, keeping his eyes on Flim and Flam while simultaneously allowing the fillies some privacy.
“The beginning, then,” Apple Bloom agreed, “We are on the clock, after all.”
Flim and Flam looked uncomfortable. They were two grown stallions who had always put on airs of confidence and were now, suddenly, relying on three fillies to figure out a problem they should know the answer to. It was pretty embarrassing.
“Well…” Flim began.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders listened to the story. According to the twins, it began when they were young colts trying to make some money. They didn’t specify where, but their hometown wasn’t very supportive, and their parents seemed absent. With no friends to help them, they had to improvise. With almost no resources, they had schemed to overstate the value of what little they had in order to barter for items of slightly more worth. Eventually their swindling had acquired them a crate of apples which were overly-ripe. They managed to harness the juice and water it down, selling the unpleasant beverages as a ‘healthy, diet’ fruit juice. Then they got their Cutie Marks.
“So you think your talent is swindling other ponies together?” Apple Bloom asked, eyeing the apple slice and sliced apple on their flanks.
“We might be having second thoughts,” Flam confessed, “Our first day of business lessons yesterday made us realize we don’t need to trick ponies…”
“It also goes without saying that we don’t have much in the way of money,” Flim chortled, “So, if swindling for bits was our special talent, then why aren’t we rich?”
“Well, wealth doesn’t really tie into it,” Sweetie explained, “Now, the fact you two keep getting called out on your scams is a better example of why it’s not your talent. After all, if you were good at it, you wouldn’t get caught.”
“Ouch!” Flam reeled, “Dear brother, we’ve just been served a cold plate of reality from a filly half our age!”
“Indeed, brother!” Flim looked the young unicorn up and down, reevaluating her.
“There’s no doubt your Cutie Marks are about you two working together,” Scootaloo said, earning nods of agreement from her friends, “they literally complete each other!”
“Them being apples isn’t too important, either,” Apple Bloom explained, “Sometimes a symbol is just a symbol; for instance, my Cutie Mark has an apple, but my talent is shared with the others and has nothing to do with apples.”
“Have either of you thought about managing a legitimate juice company?” Sweetie suggested, drawing all eyes to her, “I mean, think about it. Both of you enjoy selling beverages; isn’t that what you always end up selling? Why not be partners in a legitimate business?”
“You both are pretty talented engineers,” Apple Bloom added, “You did build that cider machine, right?”
“Yes, but it turned out to be a failure,” Flim frowned.
“What if you tried again?” Scootaloo asked, “This time, don’t cut corners, though.”
“These are interesting ideas,” Flam held his head up, “but I fail to see what they have to do with our talent.”
“Are we business-ponies, juice sales-ponies, swindlers, engineers?” Flim asked.
“I think you’re focusing too much on the talent,” Apple Bloom smiled, disarmingly, “Your talent ain’t a skill or even a skillset; it’s you two working together! Think about it.”
“You two are amazing problem-solvers,” Sweetie explained.
“…and skilled engineers and carpenters,” Scootaloo added.
“…who are also very charismatic,” Apple Bloom finished, “These traits don’t fit under any one talent, and they certainly don’t confine you to a single job. Your talent is that you two can accomplish anything together!”
“Which means, with Celestia’s teachings, you two could be the greatest business-ponies…” Sweetie began.
“…or engineers…” Scootaloo continued.
“…or anything you put your mind to!” Apple Bloom finished.
“Huh…” flam grunted, clearing his throat a little and trying to hold back a wave of emotion, “No pony has ever shown so much faith in us before.”
“Even when we were young, before we took up swindling,” Flim seemed to have similar trouble, scrubbing his eyes and pretending there was something caught in them, “every pony treated us as if we were up to no good. No pony has ever told us we had potential for anything beyond swindling before.”
“Imagine, brother…” Flam looked in the distance.
“Thank you,” the twins said, uncharacteristically quiet and slow, the genuineness in their voice startling the fillies more than the bow they pulled off in tandem, “Cutie Mark Crusaders.”
“Aw, shucks, it was nothing,” Apple Bloom blushed at the praise, then frowned at a realization, “Darn… I guess we finished our job and it ain’t even lunch yet.”
“That has to be our fastest Cutie Mark solution to date,” Scootaloo raised her eyebrows, “Talk about a speed record.”
“So… what now?” Sweetie asked, nodding farewell to the unicorn twins as they left the dining room, both excited at their newfound possibilities.
They were still sitting there when Princess Celestia returned from her first round of royal duties, levitating one of Flim and Flam’s leftover sodas from the fridge and twisting it open. She noticed the fillies alone.
“What happened?” she asked, “Those two didn’t get frustrated and walk out, did they?”
“Quite the opposite,” Apple Bloom confessed, “We helped them figure out their talent.”
“Already?!” Celestia almost choked on the soda before regaining her poise, “I knew you were experts, but that’s impressive…”
“It was actually pretty simple,” Scootaloo explained, “Their talent is working well together; they have a lot of skills, but they only seem to work when they cooperate.”
“With your teachings on ethics,” Sweetie added, “they could do a lot of good!”
“As I said,” Celestia nodded, “impressive. What is next for you, young Crusaders?”
“Well, that’s the thing,” the farm filly scraped a hoof against the floor, refusing to look up at the Princess, her dream coming back to mind, “we, uh… we don’t know what to do.”
“Do we just go back home, or…?” Sweetie left the question unspoken.
“You’ve helped me with the task I have assigned you,” Celestia smiled, “You are welcome guests in Canterlot, at least for as long as your families permit. Still, I sense there is something else you wish. Please, speak.”
The three fillies eyed each other anxiously, not used to requesting something from a Princess. Finally, Scootaloo stepped forward, putting on a display of confidence and determination she was nowhere close to feeling. Celestia eyed her, coolly, curious where this was going.
“We would like to be taught,” the pegasus filly said, her resolve eroding a little at sounding so demanding, “b-by you or Princess Luna.”
“I-if that’s alright with you,” Apple Bloom added, Sweetie nodding in agreement.
Celestia eyed each of them in turn before turning her back on them and looking at the sculpted arches of the ceiling.
“I confess I was not expecting this,” she admitted, “I usually only educate unicorns because my teachings are almost exclusively in magic – a continuation of Starswirl’s lessons, truth be told. To be accepted into such a program requires in-depth knowledge over the magical arts and histories, a working knowledge of Old Ponish, and passing a very intensive magical test.”
The fillies felt their shoulders stoop at the revelations. What were they thinking, just waltzing in and asking Celestia to take them in as students after a measly hour of work?!
“However,” Celestia continued, causing their ears to perk up, “I have been experimenting with new curriculums to educate Flim and Flam on business ethics. Are any of you interested in that?”
“Actually, about the business thing,” Apple Bloom interjected, “their skills aren’t exclusive to it; they’re also talented in other areas.” After a moment, the filly blushed and said, “B-but taking an ethics course would be pretty nice, I suppose.”
“Not exclusive to business, eh?” Celestia rubbed her chin, “Well, I can certainly expand the curriculum a little, though now I don’t know how my plan to have them convert business-ponies to my new philosophy will work…”
“I’m sure they’ll find their niche the more they learn,” Sweetie smiled, “we structure our Cutie Mark recreations to include a wide variety of activities so ponies can find what appeals to them!”
“I imagine those two never really had many options to explore growing up,” Apple Bloom frowned, realizing how fortunate she was to have as many opportunities as she had in Ponyville.
“I suppose I should give them more choices,” Celestia conceded, “It would not be very teacher-like of me if I forced them into a career field just to advance my agenda… Alright, I will structure my classes to teach ethics, but will also introduce them to a wide range of topics and skills. The classes are later in the afternoon, 4:00 PM sharp. Luna has her classes planned to start around 6:00 PM; I’m sure she would not mind starting early, if you are interested in taking both our courses.”
“How long do the classes last?” Sweetie asked.
“I’d say mine ends around the same time hers starts,” Celestia thought about it, “though I suppose we could work a dinner break in there. Her classes will only be about two hours in length, as well; when true night falls, she begins her dream duties.”
“Whoa, we only have to go to class for four hours a day?!” Scootaloo smiled wide.
“Don’t get too excited,” Celestia warned, all seriousness, “These classes will not be like your schoolhouse courses; you will be expected to study extensively and apply what you learn to your everyday lives. Surely you’ve seen how much Twilight reads?”
The fillies paled considerably.
“Alright, so you won’t read quite that much,” Celestia smirked, “but these are advanced courses. If you really wish to study under Princesses, you must be willing to give royal effort.”
“Yes ma’am!” the three fillies declared, standing tall.
“Uh…” Scootaloo faltered, “How much is tuition?”
“Don’t worry about that, my little ponies,” Celestia chuckled, “I have the magic of scholarships!”
She chuckled at her own joke, but the fillies only looked at each other in confusion.
“Odd,” Celestia tilted her head, “Twilight always loved that joke. I shall see you three at four o’clock sharp. I’ll forward a supply list to Big Macintosh, and he can take you shopping for supplies in the meantime. Do not worry about the cost.”
“You are too kind, Princess,” Apple Bloom said as all three fillies bowed before running off to get ready for a shopping trip.
Celestia left to attend to her second bout of royal duties, finding Gutsy Gust watching the twins as they discussed their newfound possibilities. She smiled at them, momentarily forgetting she was still cross with Flam for his rebuffing of her advances the other day. Why had she thought taking Luna’s romantic advice was a good idea? Either way, it was good to see them in such high spirits, eagerly planning newer, bolder ideas while keeping her teachings in their minds. Even a single day’s course had given them a rough idea of what they should work towards.
“Gutsy Gust,” she said, drawing all eyes, “I need you to deliver a list of study supplies to Big Macintosh for three fillies. Tell him to charge it to the royal treasury and ensure he has the proper paperwork to do so.”
“Yes, Your Majesty,” the stallion saluted without question and flew off to obey.
“You two are about to have some fellow students,” the Princess of the Day smiled.
“The Crusaders?” Flam asked, surprised.
“Aren’t these lessons supposed to be difficult?” Flim added.
“I hope you don’t take offense,” Celestia chuckled, “but the courses you are taking are geared more for… novices.”
“Now why would we take offense?” Flam asked, anxiously. Normally he’d have said something sarcastic, but rejecting the Princess in a panic had made him tread lighter than a mouse surrounded by sleeping alley cats. Celestia rolled her eyes at him.
“Anyway…” she continued, “I feel I have not given you both the best educational experience possible.”
“It’s… only our second day of classes, Tia…” Flim pointed out.
“…so I’ve decided to allow you to attend Luna’s courses as well, if you wish,” Celestia ignored the clean-shaven twin, “I feel you two need the opportunity to explore and try new things.”
“What about learning business and spreading your teachings?” Flam asked.
“You don’t need to be business-ponies to spread my teachings,” Celestia said, gently, “and if there’s anything either of you want to try, just let me know.”
“A-anything?” Flam asked.
“You had your chance,” Celestia warned through gritted teeth.
“I-I was just thinking of…” Flam’s eyes darted around.
“A new beverage idea!” Flim threw in, quickly, “A blend that simulates your hair color!”
“Yeah, that!” Flam nodded.
“Interesting,” the Princess nodded, “hopefully it washes out easier than the cola you spilled in my lap the other day.”
“Are you still mad about that?” Flam chuckled, weakly.
“Let’s just say it would probably be advisable to let Flim do the talking for both of you for the next few days…” Celestia smiled, but it was a cold smile, “See you this afternoon, gentle-colts.”
As soon as she was gone, the twins let out a breath they had been holding.
…
“Don’t we usually have to buy textbooks or something?” Apple Bloom asked as she noticed their acquired supplies were mostly just quills, ink, and parchment.
“The castle provides the reading material,” Sweetie said, “Canterlot’s Royal Library is supposed to be the single greatest collection of knowledge in Equestria! Or, that’s what Twilight always says.”
“Maybe you two will find another library assistant to swoon over,” Scootaloo grinned mischievously at her friends.
“Maybe you’ll find another Wonderbolt-obsessed colt to obsess over,” Apple Bloom shot back, exchanging a hoof-bump with Sweetie Belle and earning a glare from the pegasus.
“Have you talked to Princess Luna yet, Big Mac?” Apple Bloom asked her older brother who carried the bulk of their purchased supplies in his saddlebags.
“Nope,” the stallion said.
“You gonna tell her your courting Sugar Belle?” the farm filly asked, “I mean, if she is interested in you, and all.”
“Nope,” Big Mac said, “’Cause I ain’t courting Sugar Belle no more.”
The three fillies stopped as Big Mac kept walking.
“What?!” they cried in unison, forcing him to turn around in surprise.
“W-what happened to the country songs, and the building a display for her?!” Scootaloo asked.
“And the nose-rubs?!” Sweetie added, “There was definitely nose-rubbing!”
“Why didn’t you tell me you two broke up?!” Apple Bloom demanded.
“Apple Bloom,” Big Mac snorted, face flushed in embarrassment as a few Canterlot ponies raised eyebrows at the spectacle while they passed, “It wasn’t that big of a deal. We saw each other for a few weeks, but the distance was too much to keep the relationship going. Neither of us was going to move, so… well, sometimes things just don’t work out.”
“But why didn’t you tell me?” the youngest Apple frowned, “You’re not crying on the inside like Applejack does, are you?”
“Not this time,” Big Mac sighed, resuming their walk, “It just ended by mutual consent, and we’re both still good friends. We just couldn’t make it work.”
“Wow, that’s awful…” Sweetie Belle frowned, “How will Apple Bloom and Spike be together if she’s stuck on the farm and he’s in Canterlot?”
“Oh, for the love of…” the farm filly cringed.
“Spike?” Big Mac raised his eyebrows, then grinned, “Well, you could certainly do worse.”
“H-he’s just a friend, got it?” Apple Bloom glared at her older brother.
“Eeyup,” he replied, but that smug look on his face only made her grind her teeth. Sweetie Belle was going to pay for that little remark.
“Let’s just get the rest of these supplies and get back,” Apple Bloom sighed, “It’s almost 3:00 and we still need to write our families about our acceptance!”
The others agreed and picked up the pace, eager to return to the castle.
…
“Would you mind running that by me again, please?” Celestia blinked at the two envoys.
“Since Her Majesty’s absence from the World Friendship Summit, the non-pony member states have formed a military coalition in opposition to Equestria and her allies,” one of the envoys, a Germane by his accent and uniform, explained.
“I just wanted to make sure I heard that correctly,” Celestia nodded, trying to stay composed and failing to hide the sheer dumbfounded-ness from her face, “N-now why are there two envoys instead of just one?”
“Many of our city-states can no longer tolerate the backwards traditions and political games of the more… aristocratic regimes,” the other envoy, from Marexico by her accent, declared, “They look down upon us for our more secular views, and for being governed by regular ponies.”
“Am I to understand the pony nations are dividing into two opposing camps, as well?” Celestia raised an eyebrow in an effort to appear mildly threatening.
“We are loyal to the Crown!” both envoys bowed in unison.
“…but we cannot allow these ideals of secular thought and democracy pollute our traditions and our culture!” the Germane growled, glaring at the Marexican, “They will not rest until all that is sacred and Ponish is cast out, replaced by their cold logic and foreign ideals!”
“…and we can no longer stand being dragged down and held back by associating with these close-minded, arrogant fools who live in opulence while their ponies starve!” the Marexican shot back, “I speak for all of the republican city-states when I say we are sick and tired of being tread on by tyrants!”
“Yet you still defer to me?” Celestia asked, not understanding, “You agree I am not divine, and believe in representative democracy to appoint leadership, but you still submit loyalty to me? Why?”
“To keep themselves safe,” the Germane muttered.
“Partly, this is true,” the Marexican said, evenly, “There is safety in unity with the entirety of pony-kind, and this is only through submission to Your Majesty, but there is more to it than that. While our city-states might be secular, we allow our subjects to embrace any faith, and the vast majority in all our city-states view you as a goddess, even if the states themselves will not. If you or Luna were to order anything that opposed our government, we would certainly follow you. Democracy is majority rule, after all, and the majority would follow your every word.”
“Then why have a democracy at all?” Celestia asked. Why even bother with leadership and secular states if the majority were part of the kooky cult worshipping her and would just vote to follow her every word? What was the difference between that and the aristocratic city-states?
“To protect our rights and give us the power to choose our own laws and destinies,” the Marexican got teary-eyed with passion, “Prance, Appleloosa, Marexico… these are but a few of the great republican city-states.”
“Okay…” Celestia hadn’t really bothered studying the constitutions of every individual city-state within Equestria, let alone without. Luna had brushed up on it more than she had, which in hindsight was kind of sad considering Celestia had had 1,000 years more time to study. “Well, if both of you are loyal, then I order you two end this silly feud.”
“This cannot be done, Your Majesty,” the Germane shook his head, “Our honor has been challenged, and the threat of democratic institutions and secularism is too great!”
“She just said they were loyal to me!” Celestia threw her hooves in the air, “Your city-state sees me as divine, my word as holy writ! Both of your city-states have pledged loyalty to my decrees! How is it impossible to obey my order?!”
“We will stay our hooves from conflict, Your Majesty,” the Marexican pledged, “but we cannot stand working together so long as this rift in ideology exists.”
“What do you propose?” Celestia asked.
“Take command of the city-states,” the Germane said, “Unite us! You are the unquestioned ruler of Equestria and all of pony-kind! You can bind us into the greatest empire the world has ever known!”
“I agree, but do not dishonor us by subjecting the entirety of our kind to the model of tyranny these aristocrats use!” the Marexican argued, “I beg you, your majesty! Create a republic, liberate the commoners from these backwater city-states and give them a voice in government! We can have our great pony nation, but let it be built by free ponies!”
“The common pony is a valuable asset, I agree,” the Germane said quickly, “but they are not fit to govern themselves! Most in our city-states are illiterate and uneducated in all but their trade! They do not understand the intricacies of politics. They are not prepared for such things.”
“We prove it can be done, given the education and the opportunity,” the Marexican pleaded.
“They are weak city-states with poor histories of constant infighting and disharmony,” the Germane spat, “Our city-states are secure in their hierarchies, our ponies prosperous and attentive to your teachings.”
“I… I need to think about this,” Celestia said, “Leave me. I shall discuss this with my co-regent, Luna. She is just as much the ruler of Equestria as I am.”
The two bowed, simply, though Celestia doubted either of them truly considered Luna her equal. Celestia watched them leave, feeling herself twist up inside. The non-pony nations were now military allies, while the pony city-states had gone into a frenzy of debate in her absence and decided to disassociate with each other. Now her only option was to finally use her royal authority to bind the city-states together into a more permanent institution. The model she would choose was obvious; they were godlike monarchs whose word was obeyed absolutely by all ponies. To bind the pony city-states as a single democratic republic was idiocy, for that would give their subjects the illusion of power over the royal family, and that simply wasn’t true.
Between the two of them, Celestia and Luna controlled the heavenly bodies and thus the energy that fed the world, and the tides that kept the seas and weather in order. They were immortal and more powerful than any force that had tried to stop them (minus one or two). To imply that common ponies could hold them accountable was simply a lie, an illusion that would feed their egos until every colt and filly thought they could hold their own against dark gods. It was irresponsible to feed such assumptions.
Celestia found her thinking rushed, jumbled by the sudden complications in national and international politics. Worse, she realized it was 3:56. She shoved the ideas to the back of her mind and rushed to teach her class, not wanting her students to think she was anything less than punctual.
…
“So…” Flim tapped his hooves together, sitting with his brother in one row of benches and trying to break the awkward silence with the fillies in another row, “Your sister owns a chain of clothing stores?”
“Fashion boutiques,” Sweetie Belle corrected.
“And your sister is a Wonderbolt?” Flam asked the pegasus.
“And she does Weather Patrol,” Scootaloo beamed, “Rainbow Dash is the best!”
“That’s all very impressive,” Flim whistled, “Maybe we were pining after the wrong mare, eh brother?”
“If my sister rejected you two,” Apple Bloom snorted, “you better believe theirs would, too. They have much higher standards than sis.”
“I seem to recall Applejack rejecting a lot more stallions than either of our sisters,” Sweetie smirked.
“Yeah, your sister would probably date both of them at once, actually!” Scootaloo laughed.
“Watch it…” Sweetie Belle warned.
“Say, Flam…” Apple Bloom said, “I got the impression Princess Celestia was mad at you. Were you two…?”
“Careful, brother,” Flim smirked, “she could probably sniff out a lie from a mile away like her sister.”
“I misread some signals…” Flam decided half-truths were probably his safest bets, “…and spilled some soda on her lap.”
The fillies burst into laughter and even Flim joined in, slamming a hoof against the desk. Flam only sighed, hoping they’d get it out of their system before Celestia arrived. Much to his relief, their laughter petered out mere seconds before the Princess of the hour arrived, right as the clock turned to 4:00.
“Good afternoon, my little ponies!” she greeted them, though Flam thought her smile seemed a little forced. Looking at a bored Flim and the ecstatic fillies, it was obvious he was the only one who noticed. “Today we have new students, so I will now let the three of you take some time to introduce yourselves and make friends!”
She watched as her students eyed each other in curiosity.
“Uh… Princess Celestia?” Apple Bloom raised her hoof, “We all already know each other.”
“Oh, so you do,” Celestia laughed, nervously, “Well, let’s just move onto the lesson, then. I have provided each of you with a copy of Starswirl the Bearded’s Compendium of Compassion, one of the finest classics on Equestrian ethics. I found the text quite longwinded in my youth, but it really grows on a pony after a few years. I’m sure each of you will find comfort somewhere in its pages.”
“It’s quite a lengthy read,” Flim noted, measuring the book against the circumference of his hoof and finding them about even, “I don’t suppose there’s plentiful footnotes and commentaries inside?”
“It’s a primary source, silly,” Celestia giggled, “There are no footnotes because there’s nothing to reference. And no, this is not one of the commentary editions – those are much too long.”
“And this isn’t?” Scootaloo whispered to her friends.
“Now, this will be your textbook for the entire course, which means it will be your only book for sixteen weeks,” Celestia explained, earning sighs of relief from her pupils, “but in order to finish it within that time, you will need to read no less than sixty pages a day.”
“Sixty pages?!” the fillies and twins cried out in unison.
“I also recommend taking extensive notes,” the Princess ignored the outburst, “because I will be quizzing you on the readings daily, and testing you with essay assignments weekly.”
“Oh dear, sweet Celestia preserve us!” Flam groaned, burying himself under his forelegs.
“Flattery will get you nowhere,” Celestia chuckled, “After the first week, you’ll find sixty pages a day is not as much as it seems; the font is actually larger than in some other editions. Please recall that pocket editions of this book have been made. Now, let us begin with a history of Equestria’s founding and the mystical implications of harmony in repelling the Windigos…”
After two hours, Celestia dismissed the dismal-looking ponies before her, smiling at the fond memories where she was the one shuffling away in despair. Oh, she wished Starswirl would hurry up and return from his world exploration. His postcards and letters were humorous, but she missed the old goat. His advice would certainly come in handy right about then…
The Princess blinked in surprise as Luna strolled in with a cart of books of her own and an eager smile on her face. She had forgotten about the offer to have Luna teach.
“You are certainly excited to begin your first evening of teaching, I see,” Celestia allowed herself a genuine smile at her sister’s happiness.
“More than that, Tia!” Luna beamed, “I have gotten word that Starlight and Spike are planning to travel here tomorrow morning rather than wait! They are both eager to begin their studies, and I suspect the time waiting has been painful for them.”
“Painful?” Celestia asked, worried.
“Emotionally so,” Luna sighed, “They are counting down the days until they say goodbye to their friends and family in Ponyville. It is far easier, in some cases, to simply hurry and get it over with.”
“I see…” Celestia nodded, sympathetically, “You have always been better at reading the inner emotions of ponies.”
“It is a skill one develops from seeing inside their minds,” Luna smiled at the compliment, “You have always been much greater at personal relationships, however.”
“A skill one acquires from painfully long days having to deal with every pony,” Celestia snorted, “I’m surprised I can get these two hours for classes.”
“I hope you have not overtaxed my charges,” Luna said, “It gets a little annoying, sometimes, when every pony is too exhausted to hang out with me.”
“I recall,” Celestia murmured, “Dear sister, there is a pressing matter that needs our attention, but it can wait until after your class.”
“Oh,” Luna perked up in surprise, unused to sudden emergencies that required both of them, “It must be urgent.”
“Not so urgent it can’t wait two hours,” Celestia smiled, then yawned, “Nothing can be expected to be done for a few days, regardless.” The fillies returned, though Flim and Flam had opted out of attending the night course. “If you will excuse me, sister, I will leave you to your ‘charges’.”
Luna took the lectern as the Princess of the Day walked away, still yawning.
“Upon this cart is a collection of books,” Luna explained, levitating one before each of the fillies, “each is a political primer written by a different author. Do not fear, they are simple manifestos numbering less than a hundred pages in length. These will be your only books for the course, and you will have to read all three eventually, but feel free to enjoy them at your own pace.”
“Huh, this one’s written by Starlight,” Scootaloo noted.
“So this is a political course?” Sweetie asked.
“Yes, though once a week I’m also offering special courses for those of you interested in magic, chivalry, ancient lore, and Old Ponish,” the Princess of the Night explained, “but the nightly courses will be centered around political science. Each of those primers represents a different ideal in socio-economic politics. Starlight represents a particular radical set of views.”
“I’m going to level with you and admit I don’t know half the words you used,” Apple Bloom said.
“That is why I shall teach you the basics of Equestria’s ancient laws and politics, so you might understand what is written in these books,” Luna explained, with a smile, “and why.”
“What if we’re not interested in politics?” Sweetie Belle grimaced.
“I’d encourage you to at least try a few classes…” Luna frowned, feeling a little hurt, “but if you really don’t like the course, you can drop it and still enjoy any of the once-a-week classes I plan on teaching.”
“We’ll try it,” Apple Bloom assured the Princess, the other fillies nodding agreement.
“That is all I ask,” Luna smiled, slightly reassured, “Now… let’s begin.”
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To be honest the meeting between the Cutiemark Crusaders and the Flim Flam brothers wasn’t as cringy as expected.
No offence to the story, of course.
8779166
None taken, lol. I was worried I had laid it on a little too sweet there, but I rolled the dice. Glad to see it wasn't too distracting, though.
Neat
Celestia dodged a bullet when the CMC asked for her to teach them. She was honest and forthright about having taught only unicorns and why, and then proceeded to use her new curriculum for the brothers and adapted it some more for something she could teach all three tribes. It would hardly do for Scoots and Abby to resent Sweetie Belle as the only filly Celestia would teach. It's good to see Celestia's teaching the Flim Flam brothers coming full-circle, as it sounds like between her and Luna's teaching, they'll have a fairly rounded education for those five along with Starlight and Trixie and Spike and whomever else eventually gets roped in.
At least they also brought up the FlimFlam brother's cider-making machine.
That scene between the Germane and the Marexican ambassador...honestly makes me think of something like this:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/1/16/457.gif
9446803
Don't get too hopeful about the education sequences. That's sort of the other thing I'm not happy with in this fic. Ugh, if I could somehow go back and change massive swaths of the plot...