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Foal Star

I mostly write age regression fics


Twilight finds a rare rejuvination spell and tries to fix Fizzlepop's horn. The spell works but with one major side effect; It turns Fizzlepop into a one year old foal. Time goes by and with no cure in sight and Fizzlepop's magic surges are getting out of control. Twilight's only option is to send Fizzlepop to magic daycare with Flurry Heart to learn to control her magic surges.

Editor Superpinkbrony12

Chapters (7)
Comments ( 40 )


Decent writing and presentation with what looks like only one or two visible typos. (sound alike where it looks like you meant to have sounds like, and maybe one other I can't recall.)

You get a like and a track.

Will Grubber be in this story?

Holy cow this is very interesting so far! Can't wait for the next chapter :pinkiesmile:

Hhhhmmm I have to see how you write Shining Armor and Cadance, because I usually don'T like them very much, but sometimes I can enjoy Cadance in stories. Is this supposed to be a different universe?

I guess the parents make me kind of wary about Flurry Heart and her being an Alicorn. I liked what I had seen so far actually, but sometimes the show get's some ideas that I like to question a bit, or I just get a bad feeling what the authors do with it.
You maybe know this or that talk about Flurry, but well I will see it for myself and read it tomorrow.

I took a quick look and it looked good so far.

I have many works where I present Shining and Cadence and ultimatley I aim for a more slice of life approach with family drama. So I assume Im following the show's approach.

hhhmmm I like slice of life, I just don't always agree with how far they take it with the powers from Cadance and Luna and.....I don't know what else it was, maybe the shows "knight in shining armor" /"prince charming" approach with shining that I disliked so often.

I wanted to say I also dislike how they make the princesses all knowing and slightly arrogant, but I guess they do that with all of them from time to time, so I think I actually let you suprise me.

Here try my story Finding Shining this is how I write him mostly

Can't wait to see Tempest interacting with Flurry. :rainbowkiss:

a very cute little story. well done. ^_^

Very impressive! I like the addition of Twilight using a 'Circle of Power'. Ever since I played Eternal darkness on the Nintendo gameCube I've thought on how cool that way of utilizing magic to be quite awesome. I even wrote a kids' story that utilizes said circles along with other forms of spell casting.

Back to the story, I'd definitely say you have brought forth a most inspirational tale of getting Fizzlepop a new lease on life. She would certainly be harder to get acceptance than Starlight due to her broken horn and scar. Not having the armor helps but those facial features certainly don't say, "I'm friendly!".

What's next for Fizzlepop? Getting to find out will be totally awesome! Great new story to make 2018 extra epic for your writing achievements.

I wonder if Mr. Cake has ever caught Mrs. Cake on the recieving end of Pumpkin's magic surges? :rainbowlaugh:

This story is coming out even better than I expected! This is saying a lot as, honestly, once you announced it I knew it would be awesomeand, well, it's definitely very well done beyond any of my expectations. Plus this means it will just get better due to still more chapters to come! :)

I'm liking how Fizzlepop is aware of her 'surges' and is getting away with being a mischief-maker as a result of her regression making her such a little filly. I wonder if Twilight and Starlight will ever catch on?

Mrs. Cake mentioning it as a 'punishment' made me think on how someone would genuinely view a villainous character if they were regressed? Would it make others more receptive to their efforts to change? To be a better person?

Giving Fizzle back her horn and removing the scar is certainly a wonderful result of this happening to her. Now we just got to find out if she will have to grow up again, or can be grown back up without losing her horn and regaining her scar as a result.

Plenty of questions to be answered with loads of comedic potential. Definitely excited for the next part!

I'm more worried about Tempest learning bad things from Flurry Heart, then I am Flurry Heart learning bad things from Tempest. Flurry Heart may be adorable, but she has a tendency to get into trouble. :duck:

But maybe Tempest could help teach Flurry not to be scared of the potty. :rainbowkiss:

Great job with Shining Armor in this chapter. He'd certainly be very protective of Cadence after all that has happened to her over the years. She's been trapped by Chrysalis... twice..., turned to stone by Tempest, and nearly overcome by King Sombra. For as many times as he hasn't been able to genuinely be her knight in shining armor I know he'd be extremely cautious over anything that could pose a threat to her. Oh! She was also banished by Tirek. Dang! Shining certainly would be ultra protective.

Flurry Heart was also done well. Her interaction with little Fizzlepop was perfect. The way in which they made the apology letter was ultra cute!

Wow! That magic surge certainly made a mess of The Castle of Friendship. I laughed at Starlight being suddenly foalified and trying to keep a degree of composure while drooling there. No doubt she was trying to fight what happened but focus and emotion is not easy to come by with mental regression. There is also poor Spike. I can imagine a gag later where, if Fizzlepop comes back, he sees her start a magic surge and just goes to put the diaper on himself.

Shining is being a dick.


8735217 Shining's just being overprotective, that's all. I'm sure he'll change his tune once he gets to know little Tempest.

Tempest put diapers on Spike?!?!!?!!

Flurry and Tempest just wanted to help Shining get some sleep, that's all. :rainbowkiss:

What a great 'Slice of Life' chapter. Plus the call backs to previous stories was nice, too. Definitely can't forget Shining's 'Diaper Dance' from "Finding Shining".

Shining Armor tries so hard but always gets thwarted in the silliest of ways. He is truly a humble take on the whole 'Knight In Shining Armor' concept. He has a tough voice, authoritative job, but is so prone to mischief. Plus, if I guess right, Flurry already has him wrapped around her hoof. :)

You did really good in sharing the parent and grandparent dynamics in this chapter. Very enjoyable. :)

Potty-trained first.

read the mlp movie comic book prequal it may change your story tho( i havnt read this story yet so please dont spoil it or tell me that im wrong)

Nice to see Flurry Heart and Tempest have made a friend. :rainbowkiss:

Also, I wonder what sort of family issues Tempest has with her biological parents, and if they'll find out she's a foal again. :applejackunsure:

D'aww. What made this chapter shine, to me, was all the new foal lore you added. The idea of having 'Horn Aches' as a kind of growing pain was quite original while making a lot of sense. I'm sure growing your horn can't be easy for a Unicorn. Perhaps the same can be said about a Pegasus and their wings?

Rebecca Pie is definitely a cute character, too. I wonder if she is a distant cousin to the Pie family? Sometimes you can have family lines that are miles from being related. I know there is two different lines of my family that live in the very state I live in.

You also touched on Fizzlepop's parents. I wondered about them even after reading "The Stormy Road To Canterlot". Her friends are mentioned in the prequel book but not her family. So it does make sense she would not want to go back to them. If they were more involved she may not have run away and ended up working for The Storm King.

Great content for a delightful story. :)

I like Tinkle Spark. I want to see more of him. :twilightsmile:

I wounding who the unlucky guard who stuck guard flurryheart? While her mother and father aren't around look after her! I feel sorry for that guard have watched her!

Letting foals have unlimited access to the dream realm, what could possibly go wrong? :duck:

Love this story. in the Movie we didn't know what Fizzlepop's cutie mark was. Maybe as Fizzlepop grows up as Twilight's foal she will get a cutie mark

I thought Sunburst does that?

That would me Tempest will be Twilight's step-niece?

This chapter was ultra-cute in how we got to learn about another pony who is able to access the Dream Realm. Young Tinkle Spark was so adorable as he did what he knew how to do to make things right in Celestia's and Cadence's dreams. His appearances were definitely much like Princess Luna. Perhaps, one day, he'll be a stallion who aids in the patrol of The Dream Realm?

The dreams themselves were great. Cadence would likely be dreaming about having another foal with all the thoughts she had that day about giving Flurry a little brother, or sister. Princess Celestia hasn't been young for so long that dreaming about being a little princess makes sense. She does have a stressful job and dreaming about less stress, more play, and cake would certainly be up her alley.
Poor Starlight. She'd love to have a great dream about sunburst. However she got 'borrowed' to help get Fizzlepop and Tinkle out of the dream they shouldn't have been in. I'm sure she'll have some interesting thoughts on her dreams when she wakes up. It could make for a fun chat between herself and Twilight. Both having seen Princess Luna and having been deposited into other dreams.

Very clever chapter with a neat plot change that was not expected. Seeing Tinkle Spark as more than a 'filler character' is very cool. :)

I bet Flurry Heart gets jealous of Sparkle Light, especially after Cadence said that Sparkle Light was "The cutest little filly."

8798049 Now why would she be jealous? She's not the only filly in the world and she's had no trouble so far with Tempest getting love from her mommy.

Very adorable dreams. The way they connected together was really great. The one with Shining Armor and Cadance was certainly cute. I could believe he'd have such a dream after all that he had been through since returning home. Put on top of that how his mom embarrasses the heck out of him for how he was as a foal and that dream makes loads of sense. I'm also sure the dream of getting married repeats as that was almost a total disaster when there should've been nothing else except pure happiness. Not being able to protect Cadance himself would certainly be a lingering point of self-disappointment.

Cadance's dream making her feel more like having another foal along with getting her 'maternal engine' working again makes loads of sense, too. Definitely a lot of dreams that would apply to current events.

<LoL!> The part about the lipstick on Cadance's face along with it being bad for foals reminded me a lot of a video I saw where it showed the Mane 6 talking about naughty things they did as foals. I believe Rarity said, "Lipstick tastes icky and is not for babies!". :)

Very nice way to continue the story while having fun with dreams. I wonder if we'll see more of Tinkle Star?

You always cheer me up.Thank you and yes there will be more of Tinkle Spark.

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