Episode 5: The Hunt
Long ago in a distant land, I, Nightmare Moon, the shape shifting mistress of darkness unleashed a never-ending night! But, a foalish pony warrior, wielding a magic stone stepped forth to oppose me! Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung her into the future, where my darkness is law! Now the foal seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is Nightmare Moon!
Samurai Twilight
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic belongs to Hasbro studios
Samurai Jack belongs to Cartoon Network
Episode 5: The Hunt
Diamond Dogs are hulking, bestial creatures little less than the height of a human that are not noted for their eloquence of speech, mental acuity or personal hygiene. They are however valued for their ability to unquestioningly follow orders, and to only follow the orders of certain people once they’ve been hit over the head with a big stick enough times. The personal hygiene problem hasn’t yet been solved by any means.
For all of their negative qualities, Diamond Dogs have one major positive aspect that cannot be ignored. They are not Dig Dogs. The Dig Dog is an offshoot of the Diamond Dog species, with even less intellectual capacity, more highly developed musculature and natural halitosis that could drop an ox at ten paces.
The blue Pegasus restrained in the center of the room really wished the Dig Dog guards were that far away, but they persisted in single-mindedly following their orders to keep her secure. Suppressing a gag at the rancid smell that wafted over her, she tried to remember the events that had lead up to her incarceration. After a few moments she gave up, recalling only an indistinct haze filtered through several nights of hard partying.
The squeal of rusty metal hinges caught her attention, and she looked up to see the holding cell’s door slowly forced open by a grumbling Diamond Dog. It gave her a blank look before fishing a grubby slip of paper from a pocket of the ragged vest it wore. Clearing its throat and spitting a gobbet of something green into the corner, it read aloud.
“Dear bracket insert prisoner name here bracket comma.” The ability to read marked this Diamond Dog as near genius-level intelligence for its race. “You are being held for various crimes against Rift City comma the Nightmare State and Her Illustrious Majesty Herself colon Nightmare Moon.” Its bored tone and surprisingly good pronunciation indicated that this was not nearly the first time it had read the speech. “You will be brought before a blah blah BLAH! Don’t care about the rest! Dig Dogs! Bring prisoner along for judge to sentence!”
The Dig Dogs unhooked the chains that linked her hoof cuffs to the floor by snapping the links (they had secured her there by bending them into the right shape) and dragged her forward, not waiting to see if she actually came along willingly. Trotting to keep up, the Pegasus nearly tripped over her manacles several times. With her wings bound to her sides, there wasn’t much she could do to attempt escape, so she bided her time.
The Diamond Dog lead them down a plain concrete hall to a large waiting room, furnished with chairs designed for maximum discomfort. The Dig Dog guards were relieved of their charge, much to their charge’s relief, by a burly centaur in armor. The Pegasus gave him an appraising glance and grinned.
“Hey there, Rainbow Dash, at your service.”
As the centaur, who had never given his name, clamped a thick metal collar around her neck, Rainbow Dash reflected that the trial could have gone worse, but only if a spontaneous musical number had started up in the middle of it. The provincial governor’s daughter had been there, whom Dash had danced with (and maybe a little more). The same went for the governor’s wife. And the governor.
In retrospect seducing all three of them at one party was probably a bad idea.
Her list of crimes had read like somebody’s shopping list, clinical and brief, without going in to the juicy details of everything she had done. It was a shame really; there had been some impressive ones. In the end it was determined that she fell in to a sort of grey area between a swift execution and a slow one by labor. This of course didn’t matter, because every criminal in Rift City got the same sentence. The Hunt.
The Hunt was an old tradition, going back a lot further than Dash actually cared about. The unfortunate criminal was released in the city and given a brief head start. After that, bounty hunters and lesser psychopaths were given the signal to begin their hunt, and a grand chase across the city would begin. The hunter or team who brought down the target would receive a prize taken from the entry fees for The Hunt, along with bragging rights and a lot of free drinks at the local bars. If the target was able to escape the city, the prize money would become a bounty placed on their head, and The Hunt would simply find a new victim.
The heavy and rather uncomfortable collar fastened around her neck was a recent addition to keep things more interesting. A technician waved a metal wand over it and muttered an incantation that sounded suspiciously like random mumbling, and Dash felt the cold fingers of an enchantment clamp down on her mind. The effect was immediate; her wings went numb and felt like they were made of rubber, as she tried to stretch them they refused to cooperate and flopped about at her sides.
“You know you could have just asked.” Rainbow Dash told the Hunt official present “I totally promise I wouldn’t cheat and just fly out of the city or something lame like that. Really.”
The official, a rotund beetle standing on its hind legs, ignored her. Dash considered stepping on him, but decided against it when she glanced back at the Dig Dogs standing by the door. At least she had a chance of escaping with the hunters, if she harmed the official the guards would reduce her to interior decorating.
“Zhe Hunt iz nearly ready to begin.” The beetle intoned, his mind clearly elsewhere. “If zhe partizipant doez not have any furzer questionz?”
“Yeah,” Dash said. “I actually have one. Can I take a bathroom break? Like, for a few years until everyone forgets about me?”
The official snorted, no mean feat for a beetle, and waved the Dig Dogs forward. “Take ze criminal zcum to ze releaze point!”
“You’re off my Winter Solstice card list!” Dash shouted as she was dragged outside.
“This Jade Line razor train will be arriving at Rift City Terminus in ten minutes. Please ensure that your belongings are secure and your travel passes are at hand. Thank you for choosing the Jade Line for your transport needs. Jade Line- endorsed by Nightmare Moon through an offhand comment!”
Twilight Sparkle nudged her companion awake as the cold voice of the train’s PA system alerted her that they had little time to make themselves scarce. Both were wanted criminals, and lacked travel passes. Applejack stirred, and mumbled something that was probably a curse. Twilight poked her again, and then smacked her a few times with her own hat. The orange earth pony sat up with a groan and eyed her unicorn friend with a look of suspicion.
“If Ah didn’t know any better, Ah’d suspect you were havin’ fun.” She said with a yawn. “Is it time ta get off the train already?”
“Yeah, and we’re going to have to move quickly, they gave us less warning than I hoped for before our arrival.” Twilight stood and stretched before sliding the metal door of their narrow compartment open and glancing out. Satisfied that the hallway was clear for the moment, she hefted her saddle bag and slung it over her back. Applejack scrambled to do the same, and they stepped out into the car’s grubby passageway.
“So, remind me again, what part of this seemed like a good idea to ya?” Applejack whispered. “Cus Ah’m not too shore ‘bout the sneakin’ out o’ the train while it’s movin’, climbing under the car an’ then hidin’ there while we pass through the checkpoints.”
“It’s the only way we’ll make it into the city without fighting our way in, and that would draw too much attention.” Twilight carefully checked the next door. “Nightmare Moon might still think we’re dead, we have to use that to our advantage for as long as possible.” She slid the door open, letting in a chill breeze and the rumbling sound of the razor train’s wheels on the tracks. The car they were in was linked to the next by a narrow, flexible walkway made from metal slats on chains. It looked far too flimsy to safely support the weight of even a single pony- but luckily they would not need to use it.
Both ponies leaned over the edge of the platform and looked at the complicated underside of the car. Applejack gulped. “You’re entirely shore ‘bout this?”
“Decreasingly so.” Said Twilight.
Rainbow Dash was unceremoniously kicked out of a hovercar’s side door to land roughly on the pavement of an empty street in Rift City’s industrial sector. Giving the parting car a last rude gesture, she brushed herself off and gave her wings an experimental flap. They twitched weakly, and then flopped to her sides, useless while the interference collar remained around her neck.
With a grumbling sigh, the grounded Pegasus set off on foot, hoofing it to the relative cover of a mass of rusted pipes. “Think Dash, come on.” She muttered to herself. “If they let the mercs start too close there’d be no sport in it, but they aren’t gonna give you too much of a head start. If I were planning this out, where would I put them…”
The sharp clang of a projectile ricocheting off of a nearby pipe followed by a muffled crack from the distance answered her question. Diving around to the other side of the pipes, Dash looked around desperately for an escape route. Another shot tore a nearby sign from its post, this time she was listening for it, and the Pegasus took a guess at where it had come from.
Flicking her tail out of cover, she watched the area where she thought the shots were coming from. The moment her tail became visible a shot rang out, chipping the pavement a short distance away. Dash hadn’t caught the muzzle flash, but the gouge in the street was clearly lined up with the general area she had expected. The shooter was so far away the odds of a shot actually hitting her were low, but they were useful for forcing her to keep her head down and stay in one place.
Cursing her bad start and the temporary loss of her wings, Rainbow Dash looked for an escape route. The street was completely deserted, nobody wanted to hang around when the Hunt was getting started, and even automated vehicles would have been re-routed. A truck to hide under and stow away in out of the city would have been highly convenient. As it was, a headlong sprint across the road and into the narrow alleyways of the industrial complex would have to do.
Dash kicked a hoof out on one side of the pipes she was hidden behind, then pulled it back and ran out from the other side as a bullet shattered against her shelter. A second shot actually came close enough for her to feel its wake through the air, but she made it into the shadow of the factory intact.
More than two miles away, a dark skinned human woman raised her head from her rifle’s scope. She brushed an errant strand of her long black hair away from her face, and raised a radio to her mouth. “Your turn, sis. Target is headed your way.”
“All righty then.” A coarse female voice replied. “Time to show these amateurs how it’s done!”
Rift City was large but relatively isolated; being located on top of a large chasm from which useful gasses vented as well as conveniently close to a large mine did much for its industry, but the frozen wastes surrounding it did little for its tourism. Still, the novelty of the chasm and the lucrative business opportunities it presented ensured that the city thrived. To keep its inhabitants comfortable and safe, a massive dome had been constructed over it, limiting growth outward and upward, but ensuring that buildings didn’t have to be exposed icy winds.
Keeping in line with this, the most common transport into the city was the Razor Trains, rail cars sealed against the cold and built with thin, bladelike designs to provide minimal wind resistance as they sped along the tracks. As each train entered the city it was carefully inspected by armed guards in case saboteurs sought to damage the dome or industrial facilities. Inspection duty was a dull, cold and thankless task, which lead to many guards being less thorough than they should have been.
If the guards had actually checked the undersides of the cars beyond a cursory glance, they would have seen two ponies clinging to the hanging cables and pipes, practically frozen in place. They didn’t, however, so the train continued on into the station, passing through the thick wall of the dome. Once the train had stopped, Applejack pried her numb legs from her hiding place and dropped to the ground, landing unsteadily on her hooves. Twilight followed a moment after, landing firmly on her face.
The unicorn pulled herself to her feet while her earth pony friend shook life back into her frozen legs. Carefully sneaking along under the edge of the station platform, they found a place to scramble up and casually blend with the crowd heading into the city proper.
Applejack cautiously whispered to Twilight. “So what now? How’re we gonna tell if one o’ those elements is here? It’s not like we can just walk up ta someone an’ say ‘hey, you know where we might find a magic rock ‘round these parts we could use ta defeat the supreme ruler of the planet with?’”
“I’m… not actually sure.” Twilight admitted. “It’s more of a suspicion than anything concrete. The Elements of Harmony are a power opposed to Nightmare Moon’s, right? So it stands to reason that even if she wanted to find them, they’d be protected somehow. I did a little digging, and it turns out Nightmare Moon has never visited Rift City in person, even though it’s an important source of resources for her armies. There must be a reason for that.”
“Maybe it’s ‘cuz it’s out in the middle o’ frozen nowhere.” Said Applejack. “If I were her, I wouldn’t want ta ride one of those cramped trains just ta get out here. Anyhow, that still don’t explain what we’re gonna do now that we’re here.”
“If there’s something here, it’s probably down in the chasm. We can ask around and find out if there’s a way to get into it.” A press of bodies bottlenecked by a doorway made conversation difficult for a few minutes, but once they were free of the crowd Twilight spoke again. “First we should probably find a place to stay.”
Bounty hunters lay scattered around the street in various states of consciousness, most of them bearing hoof-shaped bruises or dents. A solitary blue Pegasus stood in the middle of the street, panting as she took a moment to regain her breath. These were the inexperienced and foolish hunters, the ones in such a hurry to claim the bounty they raced to be the first to fight her. The wiser, more experienced hunters would be waiting, letting other people go first and be beaten, and waiting for her to get worn down. It would only get harder from here on out.
Rainbow Dash gave her wings yet another test flap, only to find they were as useless as ever. She obviously wasn’t the first winged quarry of the Hunt. One of the bounty hunters stirred, so she gave him a sharp prod with a hoof to remind him to stay down before trotting away, alert for any hunters smart enough to lurk in the shadows.
“Hey, frag-face. Up here.” A voice called out to her from a low rooftop. Dash looked up to see a human woman stood pointing a wide-barreled gun down at her. Wearing a black shirt and ragged jeans, she was dressed too lightly for the chill climate of the city, but seemed not to care. Her burgundy hair was done up in a ponytail, and her face bore a wolfish grin.
“Hey there, my name’s Rainbow Dash.” A lifetime of working her way out of tight scrapes had taught Dash that if you weren’t already dead, there was still time to talk. “That’s a nice gun. Or maybe you’re just happy to see me.”
The woman snorted. “Given how much your flank is worth, I’d say I’m pretty frakking happy to see you right now. Gonna haul you in in pieces, one for every place you’re wanted.”
“Aw, not even going to buy me dinner first?” Dash teased, flicking her mane back to disguise the fact that she was scanning the area for an escape route.
“Nah, you’ll make more of a mess if your stomach’s full.” The hunter laughed. “And don’t think I don’t see you looking for a frakkin’ way outta here. It’s no use anyways, my partner’s got you covered from a frakkin’ mile away.”
Something clicked in Dash’s memory. “Wait… the sniper’s your partner? And you look kind of familiar… oh man, this is so awesome! You’re the Scourge Sisters, aren’t you?”
The woman’s grin turned up at the edges a little, beginning to almost resemble a real smile. “A fan? Cool, maybe you’d like an autographed bullet, right between the eyes.”
“What a great line!” A woman almost identical to the first except for a set of tribal tattoos on her arms stepped out from a wrecked doorway, a sleek pistol in each hand. ”I’ll have to steal it!” Before either the hunter on the roof or the Pegasus could react, she snapped off two quick shots with one pistol, hitting the woman on the roof. The unfortunate hunter fell with a cry, dropping her gun to the street below.
“I’m flattered that you’re imitating me, but aren’t you a little too old for dress up?” She ignored Dash, who took the opportunity to dart off into a narrow gap between buildings, and picked up the fallen gun.
“You let her get away.” The voice from the woman’s radio was flat, making a statement of fact without accusation.
“Whatever, I can catch her later. Just something I wanna check.” She picked up the fallen gun and examined it. “If this is what I think it is… it is! It’s a Godwyn Industries Bolter! These things are so cool!”
“And if we manage to bring in the prize, it will be like Winter Solstice Eve come early.” A hint of reproach crept into the voice. “Which won’t happen if you spend all your time drooling over every gun you come across, Mel.”
“I hate Winter Solstice Eve. Bad memories from my childhood.” The hunter, Mel, checked the bolter over, counting the rounds in the oversized clip and reloading it. “I should make my own holiday...”
“Why do I put up with you?”
As Rainbow Dash ran through the city, making sure to keep as many buildings between herself and the sniper, she reflected on her marginal increase of luck. Hunters turning on each other in pursuit of their quarry wasn’t unheard of, but it was a rare occurrence and always nice if it let you get away. She didn’t think for a second that she had truly escaped yet, the Scourge Sisters, the real ones at least, were well known for brining in bounties long thought lost. It was going to take more than a simple distraction to get them off of her tail.
A shot struck the pavement in front of her, and she tripped up in her panicked attempt to stop. The sniper had a clear view of the entire street ahead, making it suicide to try running down it. The only consolation was that without her partner nearby shooting the target was a big risk, as another hunter could recover the body and turn it in for the prize. She would most likely try to herd Dash to a place where her partner could catch up on foot and guarantee they got the credit. Of course if she was skilled enough she could shoot to just injure her quarry and slow her down. The smart choice would be for the Pegasus to allow herself to be herded around for now, and look for a later chance to escape.
Dash threw herself forward and charged headlong down the street, legs carrying her as fast as they could. Her reckless charge must have surprised the sniper, because she made it halfway before another shot hit the ground a short ways away. She began to jink from side to side, the extreme range making accurate anticipation of her moves impossible.
The street terminated at a T-shaped intersection, the cross street leading to another part of the industrial sector one way, and the more heavily populated residential and commercial sectors the other way. Dash turned right and continued running full-tilt, heading to the population center. More people meant more cover, and the hunters would face heavy fines and possible criminal charges if bystanders were harmed by their actions. They couldn’t do much to Dash at this point except increase the bounty on her head, so she left the safety of the uninvolved citizens to the hunter’s sense of professionalism and good aim. She had bigger things to worry about.
The most upscale lodgings in the city had instantly been out of consideration when Applejack and Twilight considered where they might stay, because of a lack of both funds and ID that wouldn’t send up warning flags of criminal activity. They had been forced to discreetly canvas several locations, moving down the scale of class and finances until they found a hotel between the industrial and commercial sectors that was cheap and didn’t ask for ID. It was fittingly run down and smelled a bit like burned potatoes, but neither pony was planning on spending much time there.
Applejack gave the room a dubious glance and raised an eyebrow at Twilight. “There’s only one bed.”
“Um, yes.” Twilight said, unwilling to step in and be the first to test the carpet’s consistency. “The larger rooms were needlessly expensive.”
“Well that bed is hardly big enough fer even a single pony, ‘an Ah’m not gonna sleep on this floor.” Applejack prodded the carpet with an exploratory hoof and found it to be passably inoffensive.
Twilight sighed. “Maybe we can sleep in shifts then, it’ll only be for a few days anyways.”
A door slammed open down the hall, causing both ponies to jump. Twilight dove to one side and Applejack leapt into the room to avoid a blue Pegasus who charged straight past them, ran through the room and dove through the window. Hot on her heels was a human woman with an almost comically large gun in her hands who was shouting and swearing almost incomprehensibly. The two ponies looked at the hole in the wall where the window had been, then at each other.
“I say we go tell the manager what happened and then go get something to eat.” Twilight said.
“Sounds fine ta me.” Applejack replied, stepping out into the hall and closing the door. “Ah really hope that sort o’ thing ain’t normal ‘round here.”
“I imagine it would make it really hard to sleep.” Twilight laughed. “And kind of cold. Although I suppose that would explain why the window popped out of the frame so easily.”
“Ah hate ta think that this buildin’s that shoddy. That sort o’ thing don’t help a body sleep at night too well.” They reported the broken window to the bored looking receptionist, who gave a vague promise of something possibly being done about it, and headed out into the city once more.
They stopped at a roadside stand to buy sandwiches made with something called ‘soylens viridians’, which tasted passably like some sort of indeterminate edible thing, and Applejack assured Twilight was for the most part more nutritious than it tasted. As they walked away, a blue Pegasus mare jumped down from a balcony above and landed on the metal trailer. Shouting a quick apology, she leapt down to the street and galloped away.
“Huh” Applejack wondered aloud. “Wonder why she ain’t usin’ her wings.”
Twilight’s reply was drowned out by a loud thud as a human woman fell from the same balcony the Pegasus had come from and rolled off the stand’s roof. The owner, a skinny human man with a tic in his left eye, leaned out of the service window and shouted at her as she ran down the street after the pegasus. “Are you insane?! Stay off of my trailer!”
Two Dig Dogs in armor hit the trailer roof with a deafening crash, bringing the stand down around the owner. “My sandwich stand! You maniacs, you crushed it!” The man was livid, standing in the middle of his ruined food stand and shaking his fist as the Dig Dogs stumbled away in the wrong direction.
“Crazy.” Applejack mumbled around her sandwich.
“That Pegasus seemed kind of familiar…” said Twilight. “Wasn’t she the one who broke the window in our room?”
“’s why Ah said it was crazy.” Applejack swallowed a large bite. “Kind of a weird coincidence. Ah wonder why they’re chasin’ her.”
“They’re practicing a musical!” A blue-skinned creature with one eye and more arms than any other feature piped up cheerily as he walked by. “Just kidding, that’s the Hunt! It’s a thing we do here to attract publicity.”
“An’ what is this Hunt thing?” Applejack asked.
“Just what it sounds like, bounty hunters competing to take down a single target.” The creature waved the arms on one side of its body. “I gotta get going, if the Hunt’s moved in to this district things are gonna get messy real fast.”
Appejack shook her head sadly. “Turnin’ huntin’ people in ta sport? There’s somethin’ wrong with this city Ah tell ya.”
“I was thinking more of the bounty hunters.” Twilight admitted. “If one of them recognizes us and word might get back to Nightmare Moon that we survived.”
“Ah horseapples.” Applejack intoned. “We’re gonna have ta sneak out o’ the city again, aren’t we?”
A few times Rainbow Dash felt a pang of regret at wreaking someone’s livelihood as she lead her pursuers on a rampage through the more heavily populated districts of the city, but she had a plan and refused to just give up. Nobody had ever really opposed the Hunt, at least in large enough numbers to even be noticeable. The city’s justice system wasn’t so corrupt as to start pulling random citizens in on trumped-up charges to throw them to the Hunt, and most criminals weren’t in a position to publicly protest.
There was a way to get the citizens of Rift City riled up about the Hunt, but it was more than a little risky and would more likely than not make her even more of a wanted criminal. That was fine; she wasn’t planning on staying in this city any longer than she had to. You couldn’t put The Dash on trial for having a little fun, or a lot of fun as it was in most cases, and expect her to just go along with it!
Her plan was simple: cause as much trouble and destruction in the commercial sectors of the city, preferably the expensive kind of trouble, and get the citizenry to direct their rage and frustrations at the Hunt officials for not preventing it. It would have been easier with the use of her wings, but she was no slouch on hoof, and easily kept a comfortable distance from her pursuers. A few more bounty hunters and Dig Dog enforcers had joined in the chase, but only Mel of the Scourge Sisters had managed to stay with her the entire time.
Leaping over an ornamental fountain, she carefully kicked the water-spouting cherub on the top in the face so its head broke off. At this point she had to admit to herself that after trampling several hotels, stores, restaurants and one sandwich stand she was just having fun. Spying a flower shop, she ducked in through the front entrance and shouldered her way through the back storage rooms and out the back door, a single red rose held carefully in her teeth.
Dash came to an abrupt halt in front of a café where a grey Pegasus mare with a blonde mane was eating a muffin. She dramatically presented the rose to her. “Though we have only met today, I feel as if our hearts have been bound together from the dawn of time!” One lime colored eye swiveled up to meet Dash’s rose-tinted pair. The grey pegasus’s other eye wandered disconcertingly to one side. Dash forged ahead regardless.
“I present this single rose,” She quickly side-stepped a bola thrown from across the street which went on to wrap a waiter up along with a tureen of soup “As a sign of my undying pledge to always love you!” One of her wings chose an inopportune moment to spasm randomly, allowing the next bola to hit her, but not with the right angle to tangle around her. Instead, it smashed in to the table and obliterated the half-eaten muffin in a spray of crumbs.
“Curses!” A short green man carrying a comically large bola cannon shouted from his vantage point atop a van on the other side of the street. “Stand still and let me catch you!”
The blonde Pegasus turned her attention to the bounty hunter who had ruined her meal. “Hey! You!” Her wandering eye snapped to the fore to bring her full focus on the little man. “You’re gonna pay for that!”
The little green man scoffed. “You must be joking! The mighty and illustrious-“
“FOUR-NINTY-NINE PLUS TAAAX!” As battle cries went, it wouldn’t go down in history as one of the greats, but the Pegasus behind it certainly put enough feeling into it.
Dash fled the chaotic scene, hoping the fight would distract her pursuers long enough to make up for her delay.
Attempting to hide aboard one of the departing razor trains wasn’t an option for AJ and Twilight this time, security within Rift City was much tighter than it had in the stations outside. Luckily there was a slightly less secure motorpool with plenty of vehicles insulated against the biting cold environment on the other side of the dome. Most of them were simple trucks made more for their hauling capacity than speed, or maintenance ATVs that could only carry a single rider and a toolbox. More useful to them were the heavy, six-wheeled rovers intended for longer treks out into the wastes.
Unfortunately special permission was required to use these, and neither earth pony nor unicorn was willing to waste their time and risk their cover talking to some administrative drone about permits. Sneaking past or knocking out the guards would have to suffice, along with the hope that they could actually get a vehicle running once they made it there.
Oddly enough the motorpool was completely deserted when they arrived. Even so, they slunk through the doors cloaked by subtle spell from Twilight that muffled the sound of their hooves on the concrete floor. They found the guards a little ways in, spread out on the floor and all bearing hoof-shaped bruises.
“Looks like we aren’t the first ponies here.” Twilight observed. “Keep an eye out for trouble.”
“Can’t say Ah mind havin’ the hard work done for us,” Applejack nudged one of the unconscious guards with her foot as they passed by. “but Ah’d rather not have ta fight whoever did this.”
“Come on, if we’re lucky they’ll already be gone.” Twilight trotted over to the first wasteland rover in the line and probed it with her magic. Gentle lights played over its sides and around the doors for a moment, and then all of the locks clicked open at the same time.
“Handy.” AJ scrambled up footholds never intended for hooves beneath one of the doors. “Bet you got yerself in a whole heap o’ trouble learnin’ that trick.”
“I may have gotten in to one or two places my teachers didn’t want me to.” Twilight giggled at the memories.
AJ opened the door and started climbing into the cab, but stopped halfway in. Across from her a blue Pegasus with a rainbow-striped mane was doing the same.
“Hey there, Rainbow Dash, at your-“ The Pegasus started.
“What’s taking so long, why’d you stop?” Twilight pushed her way up beside her earth pony companion. “Oh, hello.”
Dash grinned. “You fillies headed my way?”
“Depends.” Twilight forced her way up into the cab and reached back to help AJ up. “Which way would that be?”
“Wherever the winds of the heart may guide me!” Dash hauled herself up alongside the other ponies. “But mostly away from the explosions.”
“What explosions?” AJ asked suspiciously.
Right on cue a set of doors on the opposite end of the motorpool exploded inward, shrapnel pinging off the sides of the assembled vehicles. Dash slammed the door behind herself and made her way up to the driver’s seat of the rover. “Those explosions, which are gonna be followed by a bunch of really annoying bounty hunters in a minute.” She rummaged around beneath the steering column for a moment and came up with a pair of wires. “Ok, let’s hope these are the right ones, ‘cus I have no idea what I’m doing right now!”
The frayed ends of the wires came together with an impressive spark, and the vehicle’s antitheft alarm went off. Dash looked sheepish as Twilight rolled her eyes and AJ closed the remaining door. The blue Pegasus dove into the front console once more, but Twilight beat her to it, sending a beam of faint purple light into the tangled mess of wires. “Tell me what I’m looking for.” She said “These things are kind of new to me.”
Dash shrugged. “I’ve never actually hotwired a car before. I can usually get my hooves on the keys first.”
AJ sighed. “These things use a SH type 66 fuel cell engine. You’re lookin’ for a thick yellow an’ black striped wire. Give it a little jolt o’ power fer a few seconds an’ it’ll start up.”
Twilight and Dash stared at her for a second, then turned back to the mess of wires. After a few moments Twilight sent a spark of magic into it and the vehicle grumbled to life. The Pegasus took the wheel, and the unicorn turned back to AJ.
“How did you know how to do that?” She asked, more curious than judgmental.
“We had a similar rig on the farm.” Said AJ as she strapped herself in to one of the seats. “That was uh, lackin’ in the traditional startin’ mechanism department. So we had to get creative.”
Comprehension dawned on Twilight’s face as she followed suit in the seat beside AJ. “It was ‘salvaged’ goods, right?”
“Somethin’ like that.” AJ muttered. “Hey, Rainbow Splash or whoever you are, you got a plan for keepin’ them bounty hunters off our tails?”
“That’s Dash!” Came the reply. “And unless they can run really fast, they aren’t gonna be able to keep up!”
“What about the other vehicles?” asked Twilight.
“Tried all of them already.” Dash revved the engine and the rover lurched forward, towards a set of bay doors that was opening with painful slowness. The smoke from the wreaked door on the other side of the garage was clearing, and whoever was coming through would be arriving soon. “This is the first one that should still work.”
“But there must be at dozen different vehicles in here!”
“Yep, told you this was my first time doing this. Hang on, it’s gonna get bumpy!” Six tires squealed on the pavement and the rover shot forward, clipping the doors on both sides, replacing the squeal of rubber with the screech of metal. Then they were free, bounding along the rough permafrost surrounding Rift City.
“Yeehaw!” AJ whooped, while Twilight looked slightly ill.
“Ah yeah!” Dash turned around with a wide grin plastered on her face. “I knew I could do it! You fillies just leave this to the Dash and everything will turn out-“
A thunderous crash accompanied by the groan of rending metal drowned her words out. Behind them, a massive draconic shape covered in thick plates of armor tore its way free of the remnants of the doors and charged after them, roaring in berserk fury.
“Oh crap!”
“Oh crabapples!”
Dash swore a little more colorfully than her companions and stomped on the accelerator as hard as she could. “A bucking Meta-Dragon?! They sent a Meta-Dragon after us?! Who are you two?!”
“Just drive!” AJ shouted.
“What the hay is that thing?!” Twilight turned herself all the way around in her seat to get a better look.
“It’s a big, nasty robot that wants ta eat us! Do ya need ta know anythin’ else?!”
“Why does a robot want to eat us?”
“You shore that’s the right question to be askin’?!”
“No, you’re right, I should be figuring out how to stop it.” Twilight furrowed her brow. “Just because it’s big and tough doesn’t mean I can’t find a way to…”
“Well,” said AJ “You know what they say. ‘The bigger they are…’”
“…the bigger the spell you have to use on them!” Twilight struggled free of her safety belts and opened the side door, letting in a bone-chilling wind.
“That’s not exactly how th’ saying goes.” AJ rolled her eyes and grabbed on to Twilight’s tail to keep her from falling out of the rover. The Meta-Dragon was gaining on them, flapping its wings to give itself enough lift to take exaggerated steps that passed over the bumps and hills the ponies’ vehicle had to navigate.
Twilight’s horn began to glow as she drew on her vast reserves of power and channeled them in to a spell. A tiny star-bright nova formed at the tip of her horn, bright red light seething with destructive energy. The Meta-Dragon roared once more, and Twilight gave the barely-contained magic a pinpoint opening to seep through.
A searing beam of needle-thin flame swept out from the purple unicorn’s horn with a sound like tearing silk, igniting the air around it and leaving phantom lines in the vision of anyone looking at it. The beam cut off with an audible snap, and the Meta-Dragon’s roar became a scream. The spell had raked across its open mouth, cutting cleanly through its lower jaw and scoring the armor of its neck plates. It faltered, but regained its composure and resumed the chase.
“It ain’t gonna stop comin’ ‘till it’s dead, Twi! You gotta finish it off!” AJ shouted over the rushing wind.
Twilight concentrated once more, this time shaping the red spark into a flat disc with jagged edges. The aura of power around her horn stuttered, and the spell escaped, tumbling through the air towards the robot chasing them. Twilight gasped and reached out with her magic, stabilizing the disc in time to shear through one of the Meta-Dragon’s wings, causing it to go tumbling to the ground in an avalanche of steel.
AJ pulled the exhausted unicorn back into the rover and shut the door. “Whoo! That was some impressive spell-slingin’ right there Twi! Good thinkin’ with that wing!”
Twilight laughed nervously. “I was aiming for the neck…”
Mel the bounty hunter stood in the wreckage of the former motorpool and swore softly to herself. At the sound of a footstep behind her, she spun around, recently obtained gun at the ready. A dark skinned woman with long black hair and a long-barreled rifle slung over one shoulder regarded her with a bored look.
“You let her get away.” She said for not the first time today.
Mel growled. “They sabotaged all the rovers and that damn dragon smashed the ATVs. What was I supposed to do, sprout wings and fly after them?”
Her partner sighed and held up an electronic device. “No, but you can make up for it by getting us a ticket out of here. At least one of us had the presence of mind to put trackers on all the vehicles.”
“I’m not a damn psychic, I can’t predict the future!” Mel grabbed the tracker and glared at its screen. “And if you’re so capable on your own why don’t you get us a spot on the trains yourself?”
“Mel.” The sniper put a hand on Mel’s shoulder.
“Shut it Tiana! I’m gonna find the nearest bar and start a fight after a few drinks. Don’t interrupt me.”
Next time, on Samurai Twilight:
Crystal grass crackled under their hooves like shards of glass, their steps leaving a trail of pulverized shards. This was a truly alien landscape, one touched by a power not of this world. The three ponies felt a deep sense of dread within their hearts that told them to run away and never look back, and yet they also felt something deeper calling them. As they passed a stand of fractal trees wrought from crystal like clear water, a dry breeze rustled their branches with a sound like a hundred wind chimes…
Episode Six: The Singing Forest
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Someone /is/ reading this
HAHAHAHAHA!!! In chapter 4, did anyone else think of the Ginyu Force when the five bounty hunters attacked?
Also, i loved watching Samurai Jack, and this story is even better then the original.
I started this with the thought that it was just going to be just another cut-and-paste-the characters-with-ponies type of fic. However, less than four chapters later, I could easily see this standing by itself alongside, if not slightly above both series (which in my opinion, is what a good crossover fic should do). The characters are all well written, the dialogue is both humorous and entertaining, and the backdrop is written so that it leaves just enough out to let the reader fill in the gaps with their own imagination. I'm honestly surprised that this doesn't have more readers. The pacing makes it seem as though it might turn into a fairly long piece, but at the same time is slow enough to let the reader enjoy the story instead of rushing along at breakneck speed. All in all, this is a great works I've read on this site so far and I look forward to seeing more chapters in the future. 5 stars for you my friend.
Well, this was a great fic. The 40K shout-out was a neat bonus.
This is going on my tracking list....
WHOA SNAP!!! but take a look at this... amybe this is where you got your idea ehh??
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDY5YpLqypk&feature=BFa&list=PL468CA413A162F30F&lf=mh_lolz
and BTW.... i bet my left hoof that, that twilight will go to a haunted mansion just like Jack where she finds a young girl and follows her to the mansion only to find it was haunted by a shadow pontergiest
I want moar now!
Samurai Jack and ponies? Sure why not.
Still following this! When will the next chapter come online?
I haven't even started reading but I can already say, "THANK YA SWEET BABY JEBUS"
When is there going to be an update? Is the story on haitus?
Hope this eventually gets finished. I know it's been ages so chances are slim but I just found it and I love it so far.
639577 Ditto
And so we wait...
Twi-Twi Twi-Twi Samurai Twilight wachat.
Three months since even the last coherent comment?!
I hope the author hasn't lost interest...
Even though I know it's Nightmare Moon whose Aku, when reading the description, I can only hear Aku saying it.
7169 i was thinking a cross between the ginyu force and the power rangers mr person who commented three years ago.
Edit: the comment button worked despite the error messages. Just cleared some accidental spam.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~ SJ!!!
this story is dead