• Member Since 10th Dec, 2017
  • offline last seen September 10th

joetraincool2


E

Through thick and thin Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends have defeated whatever fate could throw at them, but only just. It's time for a new strategy to secure Equestria's safety. Now that the Storm King has been defeated, it will take all of Twilight's nerve and cunning to stop his Commanders from achieving their ultimate goal: World Domination.


An attempt at playing war straight with the show. Canon up to Season 7, the Movie, and some of the IDW comics.

Chapters (4)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 23 )

and sure she shirked you and left for the spa instead of entertaining any sort of diplomacy. She didn't even let you mention that Celestia had asked for her personally.

Yeah, most people seem to forget that part and just jump straight to Twilight's mess-up. It was a pretty dumb move on Novo's part. Not that that excuses Twilight's actions, of course...

Great chapter so far! I'm looking forward to the rest!

You think there will be some infighting among the Storm King's forces like commander vs commander?

Also, is it safe to say that we can kiss Equestrian-Hippogriff relations goodbye in this timeline?

8792957
Perhaps. Especially once they here that their leader is dead.

I absolutely cannot wait for the next chapter. You, sir, have earned yourself a tracker!

I deeply enjoy this characterization of Twilight as this blisteringly efficient, MacGyver-meets-Joan of Arc type. "Never run a military before? Allow me to familiarize myself with it in an afternoon and revolutionize our military overnight." :twilightsmile:

"I just can't believe they fell through the cracks like that," Twilight said.

I see what you did there. :ajsmug:

You had my curiosity. Now you have my attention. And a follow.

8800317
Join the club. :)

"You see, officers, when a mysterious enemy shows up and asks for your complete and total surrender, we, from now on, will not allow them to continue to monologue.

This line, right here, was the final nail in the coffin for any attempt I might have made to not like this story. It's just on point.

Fizzlepop Berrytwist, for the first time in a very long time, was truly nervous. She, Grubber, and the captured Stormguards had been allowed to enjoy the Friendship Festival following their defeat, but the rest of the night was spend under lock and key in what appeared to be an unused guard barracks. Tomorrow, she would face trial for her actions. By her honor as a commander, she would face the day with her head held high.

>She, Grubber, and the captured Stormguards had been allowed to enjoy the Friendship Festival following their defeat, but the rest of the night was spend under lock and key in what appeared to be an unused guard barracks.
>defeated enemy soldiers invited to festival because it would be, like, mean otherwise
Send help, my sides have mysteriously disappeared and may be in the kupier belt

Not to sound pushy or anything, but is this story on a hiatus or something?

8801051
Yeah, if only the writers could do something like this. I, for one, would love to see Equestria's government grow a spine and not just have to rely on the Elements for everything.

Stupid TV-Y rating...

8870279
I try to average 10k words a month, but that just isn't always possible. Bear with. If it were on hiatus I'd tag it.

8870998
Got it. I totally understand. But in all seriousness, this is one of the best post-Movie fics I've read.

But I do have to ask a question: will Novo and the rest of the hippogriffs make a return later on? It seemed like their exit at the dinner was (somewhat understandably) abrupt, and I'd love to see how your version of Celestia deals with her in regards to her "response".

Anyway, sorry to bother you, and happy writing.

If the main OCs in this story were voiced, what would they sound like?

8919586
General Kuiper has a generic english accent, but General Sure Arc takes reference from a specific person, which Ive left hints at in the story. Anyone who can prove they know who that is w/out spoiling it gets a cookie. 😋

Finally! I've been waiting a while for the next chapter of this, and I wasn't disappointed! Here are my thoughts:

1. I'm a little confused by this whole "I can't forgive you right now" thing between Twilight and Fizzlepop. I've been under the impression that she already did forgive her at the end of the movie. Is this an effort to make some realistic PTSD or something?

2. My biggest wish for the next chapter is that we'll get to see what's going through Celestia's head right now. I think deep down, she just wishes everyone could get along without any trouble, but now she's seeing that Equestria is going to have to be ready to fight if they need to.

3. Hey, look! We finally get to see the villain!

4. Good grief! All this time, the Crystal Ponies were secretly overpowered alicorn OCs that could conveniently do anything?? :)

Enjoyed reading this chapter. See you around!

8920625
Glad you enjoyed it. Not to spoil anything, and I hate to explain in comments because the story should be able to speak for itself, but the show doesn't give any evidence that the Crystal Ponies have any magic, and usually in fanon they get boiled down to 'worse earth ponies'. By enchanting spells into crystal matrices, they can bring themselves to a competitive level, not necessarily better than the core races. Like a Jack of all trades sort of thing. I definitely could have made it clearer. Something to fix for the eventual rewrite lol. I can guarantee there is a reason for the Crystal Pony's inclusion, though.

As the sun rose, its light shown brilliantly against the sparse cloud cover left over from the previous evening's storm. It reflected off the damp ground, and everything shimmered in the morning light. God rays bled through the small crack between the lavender curtains of the master bedroom, and landed square on Twilight Sparkle's face...

'Gold' rays, I assume?

I was so excited to see that another chapter of this dropped. I've really enjoyed this story thus far and, if this chapter is any indication, I will continue to enjoy it for some time. Well thought out, well paced, and well executed all around. Keep up the good work!

8921566
Glad you are enjoying it. 'God Rays' refer to the phenomenon when light filters through cloud cover creating a beam effect, usually seen in the morning or after a rain storm

8920636
Thanks for the explanation. Although really, I'm a little more concerned about Twilight being somehow unable to forgive Fizzlepop (even though it seemed like she did at the end of the movie), and what Celestia is thinking of all of this.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!