A 7 year old boy finds himself sent to Equestria, only to strike a deal with Queen Chrysalis to get home.
Enjoy the story...or else
Also I feed of of comments like a changeling feeds of of love.
Chapters (6)
- Member Since 15th Jan, 2018
- offline last seen Dec 27th, 2022
ThePhonyBronyPony
HELLO FROM THE OTHER SIDE!!!!!!! of Equestria;)
ThePhonyBronyPony
Joined 15th Jan, 2018 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Skyboss · 13k words · 278 20 · 8.4k views
- Background Bystander · 76k words · 162 13 · 6.1k views
- Chemtest · 27k words · 102 7 · 1.4k views
- SociallyAwkwardPegasus · 18k words · 343 44 · 8.9k views
- PlagueRat · 121k words · 1,902 42 · 21k views
- DJ TR33 · 8.4k words · 1,095 36 · 13k views
- Abaddon spice · 14k words · 1,096 32 · 17k views
- bossfight1 · 120k words · 883 34 · 13k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.137 seconds
Total duration
1,086 users online
2,107,309 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I'm interested to see where the story is taken, considering it's a known rebirth story. Shame the protagonist didn't last that long. I wonder if that was a result of his lifestyle of no regrets.
8708728
Hi Canary In The Coal Mine
Thank you for the comment.
Glad you enjoyed it.
Decent idea. Needs proofreading.
Ooooooooooooooo, new story. Let's see where this madness goes... Cause right now, it seems like it is going places. KEEP UP DA SUPER AMAZING, PLANET CRACKING, WORLD DESTROYING, UNIVERSE CRUNCHING WORK!
8709491
Thanks for the comment!
I am glad you liked it!
8709591
But I thought that SUPER AMAZING, PLANET CRACKING, WORLD DESTROYING, UNIVERSE CRUNCHING WORK! was Jeeves’s Job!
8709952
While that might be the case, that does not mean you can not be the same! Never say never, and may we find all we need in madness...
8710319
Thank you for the kind words :)
seems good you got my attention
8710623
That’s good I is trying.
What's a rebirth story?
8711099
Honestly I wish I knew.
2:20
8711256
Yep you got it. :)
Well, I totally didn't suddenly think about warframe with that name... Totally. OK, fine, I did. However, I do know that tiatania is the Queen of the fey in Shakespeare, so don't worry. I'm not stupid. And its totally not because of warframe I know that(its actually a card games fault). As always, great chapter, keep up the good work, and MADNESS!
I go as far as the prayers from Toriko. Specifically...
Ooh! Ooh! I did!
It was mostly Greek and Egyptian mythology, though. The only other ancient things i found more fascinating: Dinosaurs, of course!
8711773
Thank you for the comment and I will do my best!
Ps: which of my story’s do you like better?
8711911
Ooh I love Greek and Egyptian mythology!
Quick fix Dodge Junction.
8712031
I think my favourite tale was a sort of parody on the tragedy of Actaeon. Except this guy survived.
And i enjoyed the tales of Hercules/Herakles, Theseus and the Minotaur (uuuuntil i later found out that Theseus got too big for his britches and became kind of a dick) and Perseus.
I've also played Age of Mythology, Tradewinds Odyssey (play that, btw) and ALL of the God of War games (3 is my favourite).
8712228
Thx
Well... a classic example of pacing and transition issues. Could be worse, I suppose. Main reason I won't argue for a rewrite is that I rather have an ongoing story with some entertainment value than abandoned one. And few things kill stories better than rewrite attempts.
There's quite a lot of typos/small mistakes (in this chapter especially). It's still readable and enjoyable to a degree, but some proofreading can do it a lot of good.
GLHF!
8715435
Thank you for the feedback and I do plan to rewrite or at least edit it later on once all the chapters are finished and when I am more skilled at writing. If you have any tips how I can improve my writing skill and feel inclined to do so please share them.
Thanks for reading
There is like four ways to fix this sentence.
Found some more
Just some capitulation errors.
Another one!
8716345
Thank you
Not only princess Titania but also the author calls princess Sunbutt princess Sunbutt. :D
8717454
I am glad you find this story enjoyable!
:D
I don't think she's going to make you feed the bear *that* way.
I guess for now she'll just have to grin and... "bear" it.
8723674
That was good :D
8723694
Thank you!
8723741
You are welcome :D
Did you mean "disappear"?
I bet 50 bits that Titania bites Thorax's face off.
8725963
Thanks I fixed it :D
I got a Harry’s razor ad. I about died.
8726197
Oh my, that’s just dreadful. Are you alright?
8726084
8732377
This is what I mean on my comment
The dark consequence of Thorax’s betrayal. No one can ever avoids the consequences wiether its for good or evil.
I'm not sure this story is for me, the characters seem two dimensional and flat to justify the main character being a mean unlikable brat who sides with Chrysalis no matter what, attacking Thorax despite him being the most reasonable person so far because he 'betrayed' Chrysalis (the details of which aren't explained).
8738735
I have my reasons for almost everything.
8738735
*Looks puzzled.*
If I have to be REALLY generous, I would call this story a "light read for die-hard Chrysalis fans and Thorax haters".
I, personally am die-hard Chrysalis fan/supporter and Thorax hater. So, despite this story's numerous flaws, I still am in the target audience and can have some entertainment/enjoyment out of it. Although I'm not sure that I would be able to stick to the end either. It even reminds me of the LotR stuff that I tried to write like 20 years ago, and that wasn't good to say the least.
So, if You aren't in the target audience, You would most likely would be better off without reading this story any further.
Have a good day.
8740173
Well I know I am not ‘Great’ at writing but any tips on how to improve would be most appreciated. Is it the punctuation? Is it the story? Is it the writing style? Is it just that you are being critical? Is it the character portrayal? What can I fix? How can I do better in the future? HELP ME PLEASE!
8740593
*Sighs* In short, as I said it before, it's "pacing", "transition" and "characterization" issues. If you want a longer version (which may easily become a wall-of-text), I'll try to PM You tomorrow (at least part of it).
I'm not the one to ask about grammar issues of any kind, as I have never studied English grammar aside from "read books and other stuff, look for patterns, try to apply them myself adding a bit of common sense" approach.
8740637
Thank you. I shall wait for your message.
Love it! Hope there will be an Update.
*breaths deeply in anticipation of next update*