Luna's Return

Everypony knew the tale of Nightmare Moon. Who didn’t? The legend was in every story book, told around every campfire, performed by every major theater. Nightmare Moon even had her own holiday in Ponyville! And rightfully so! Even if most believed her to be a myth, nothing more than an alicorn-like depression on the surface of an otherwise flawless moon, the idea of a larger-than-life being falling victim to the corrosive feelings of jealousy was something that always sat in the back of the ponies’ minds. Whether the story inspired loyalty to their triumphant Princess for protecting them from such an evil, comfort in that no being is above their emotions, or fear in becoming like the hated Nightmare, it had an impact on every little pony. So much so that it cast a shadow on who the corrupted mare used to be. Did it even matter though? As far as the ponies of the present was concerned, her story, the story of Princess Luna, was the real myth. After all, if she had been real, their monarch, Princess Celestia, surely would have mentioned her, especially if they had been sisters, like some versions of the story told. No, tales of whispering shadows and phantoms of misguided souls were more plausible than Celesita having an evil sister whom she banished to the moon. Only the insane subscribed to that theory…that was, until Luna returned.

And what of Luna’s biography? Her salvation from what made her Nightmare Moon arose a great many questions, but none of which ever showed any sort of inquiry on who she used to be; who she was before the fall. In a way, that was because tale of Princess Luna, the one that generations would read about in history textbooks years to come, didn’t really take her first breath until that night she was cleansed by the Elements of Harmony. The most ponies knew about her up to that point was that she existed. Some might say Luna was blessed with the ability to start over with ponies, to rise from the ashes of her mistakes and become anew; to reshape who she was, in both her eyes and that of her subjects. But, for as much as she wanted, she could never truly have that gift of rebirth, because there would always be one pony who remembered her former self. That pony so happened to be the most respected alicorn in Equestria, the sole ruler for 1,000 years, Luna’s big sister: Princess Celestia.

Celestia, who had unknowingly been living in the shadow of her own shame and weakness for a long, lonely 1,000 years, had been elated when she saw that Magic of Friendship truly had returned her most beloved friend to her. Although shocked to see that Luna’s form had reverted back to the state it was in before the night princess had started to harbor feelings of despair, the eldest Princess held nothing but hope that, if anything, this meant her little sister would be able to live like she once did, back when they were happy. The sun princess was practically walking on sunshine, joy filling her heart at being able to talk and play and laugh with Luna like foals again. Like nothing had ever happened. Alas, although Luna’s body was that of a filly, her mind could not be restored in quite the same manner. It wasn’t long before Celestia began to take note of how different Luna was acting than she once did. No longer did she pull pranks, or sing to the night, or laugh without restraint. No longer did she whisper secretes to her sister, or use their childhood nicknames, or wait around after sunrise to chat of the night’s adventures. Sometimes Celestia wondered if she was no longer even princess Luna.

The mystical bringer of night had become distant, cold even, and almost deadly serious. Most just assumed this was a front of regality she was trying to present, similar to what would have occurred 1,000 years prior, but Celestia knew better. It didn’t help that, as Luna learned more of what had happened since her absence, she began to avoid her sister at all costs. Well, maybe that was a big assumption, but in the very least it appeared that way, making Celestia’s worry, as well as suspicions, grow even stronger. There was something else inside of the Sun Princess too; an emotion she couldn’t put her hoof on, but she didn’t like the way it felt, how it would fall to the pit of her stomach and make her heart strain to beat. Clearly, she had to do something.

Time passed though, and the white alicorn still had made no effort to confront her sister. She was too worried about what might go wrong, rather than making things right. One night though, about two months after the fated Summer Sun Celebration, Celestia finally decided enough was enough. Luna had already risen the moon, thus allowing her sister to retire for the night, but the Sun Princess couldn’t sleep. Celestia had been planning for weeks, trying to build up the courage to talk to her sister, and it was finally time to put everything into action. So now she was slowly walking the high-ceiling halls of their castle, trying to find the night princess, moving around only by the light of her horn and the moonlight that flooded in through the many stain glass window adorning the hallway walls.

Celestia couldn’t help but note how the moon shone so much brighter now that its proper ruler had returned. In the thousand years she had taken over the duty of bringing the night while her sister was locked away on the moon, the Sun Princess found she could never quite master the craft. Celesita knew her attempt at recreating all of Luna’s constellations was sloppy, even with a guide to help her. After a while she stopped paying attention to the seasonal star changes too and would randomly decorate the dark sky with stars like a foal playing with stickers. She couldn’t even bare to think about how, for a thousand years, there were hardly any comets, bland auras, and, worst of all, no one to guard the dream realm. Without Luna’s magic, the dreams of ponies were lost on the Sun Princess. She hated to think about how many ponies suffered from that, had been plagued with so many nightmares it hurt their psyche. Luna was no longer Nightmare Moon though. She was Princess Luna again. Celestia no longer had to worry about these things. So why did she?

Celestia found her sister on the tallest balcony the Canterlot Castle had to offer. One could almost see Ponyville from this vantage point. The atmosphere felt thinner and the temperature was colder at this height, the wind relentless. Celestia couldn’t help but wonder why her sister would choose to stay so far away from the bustle of activity below her, in favor for a cold isolation. As the white mare approached the Night Princess, she was taken back by how grown up the darker mare looked. In only two months she had grown back to her teenage height, as appropriate for her age. Her coat had darkened immensely too, but what was most impressive was her mane and tail. Luna’s hair had grown out and waved like her own, but Luna’s was more translucent and was filled with stars. The beauty of it almost made Celestia jealous, but she was proud more than anything.

“Luna?” She called meekly, making her gentle approach onto the balcony.

Princess Luna, who had been lost in thought staring up at the moon, jumped a little, startled by the sudden presence of the white mare. The mignight alicorn turned to her sister, baring a quizzical expression on her face. “Sister, why art thou up at such an hour? Thou must be tired from thine royal duties. Why hasn’t thee retired to bed?” She asked, still using the royal we, but, thankfully, not the royal Canterlot voice.

“I came to see you, little sister,” Celestia replied as a gust of wind ruffled through her fur, giving her goosebumps. “Why do we not go inside for a little bit. It’s kind of cold up here, don’t you think?”

Luna frowned at the statement. “We hadn’t noticed, but if thou art cold, then we will follow thee inside, although, we are confused as to why thou hast come to speakith with us in favor of getting rest. Could thou not wait to see us until the morning, after raising thy sun?” The night alicorn asked, walking towards the safety of the castle walls.

The Sun Princess allowed herself to wait until getting inside to answer her sister, choosing not to remind her to drop the royal we as not to upset her before such as important conversation. She knew using the language of the old days put the moon princess at ease too. “I couldn’t sleep. I have something on my mind that I can no longer put off discussing with you.”

“Oh?” Luna replied, the ridge of her eye raising, “It is a royal matter? We assure thee that everything hath gone smoothly during the night court since our return.”

“No, Luna, it’s more personal than that.” Celesita replied, beginning to fidget under the eyes of her sister, regret in her decision to confront the lunar princess bubbling up from the pit of the stomach.

“Then what is it?”

“It’s you.”

Both of the Celestial sisters here shocked by Celestia’s answer, and immediately the white alicorn wished she hadn’t answered in the way she had as Luna visibly began to close herself off in an attempt to keep her emotions in check. The filly sister of Celestia from a thousand years ago would have pouted and lashed out in a burst of anger, but the Mare in front of the Sun Princess was much more calculating than that, only replying with, “We see. If it is easiest on thou than we shall make ourselves scarce, as to limit our interaction with thee.”

“No, no, Luna, heh, no. I don’t want to see less of you. In fact, I wish we could hang out more,” Celestia backtracked in a desperate attempt to keep her sister on her side. “It’s something else entirely.”

The dark features of the lunar princess were forcibly pressed together into a frown, unsatisfied by her sister’s answer. “We do not understand. If thou doth not wish to see less of us, then what is thy problem? Have we made an oversight that needith be corrected?” Luna asked.

“No, my little sister. You have been performing wonderfully. Your night sky is far more a work of art then what I presented to our subjects every night. It’s just…” Celestia sighed, “It’s just I worry about your happiness. I worry about our relationship. I want to try and fix us but I feel as if you are avoiding me. Please tell me that I am wrong in my thinking.”

Although the tension was now gone from Luna’s face, the expression she bore was stone. The only indication that she was uncomfortable was the way she absent-mindedly bit her lip. Other than that, the composure of the lunar princess was regal and confident in a way that made her the taller mare feel small. As Luna locked eyes with her sister, Celestia could have sworn she saw a glimmer of the nightmare still lurking deep within. “Thy assumption is correct,” was all that the smaller alicorn said, still holding her gaze in a way that challenged Celestia to keep going, but now that the conversation was started, both knew there was no going back.

“Luna, now I don’t understand. Why? You know I forgive you, don’t you?”

Luna finally looked away, Celestia almost feeling some relief at the movement. “Although we do not understand why thou choses to forgive us, we know that thou do, for thine heart is full of a kindness we could never imagine, but are still, nonetheless, grateful for.”

“But there is something else, isn’t there?” The Sun Princess pressed.

With a sigh, the dark alicorn turned away from her sister in favor of gazing through the clear windows of the balcony door and up at her full moon. “Everything was so black and white on the moon. My mind clear in what I had to do, even though those thoughts were tainted by the Nightmare within. But now…I don’t know what my purpose is. I don’t know who I am.”

Celestia was shocked at how soft her sister’s voice had become, and even more surprised at her drop of the royal we in such a tender confession. She wanted to reach out and hug the dark blue mare, but something stopped her. Instead she chose to try and comfort her with words, “You are my sister, Luna. My equal. You always have been and always will be.”

Tears began to well up in the eyes of the night princess, but they weren’t the tears of happiness Celestia was hoping her words would bring. “Yes, well, we must return to our duties now. Thank you for confronting us. We bid you a goodnight.”

“Luna, wait!” Celestia cried, reaching out to lay a gentle hoof on her sister as to stop her from leaving. “Please don’t shut me out again! I want us to be friends again! To laugh like we used to and love each other like we used to. Why won’t you come back to me?”

Princess Luna whipped around, mouth open as if she was about to yell something, but then, in a moment of clarity, quickly regained her compose. In an instant, she had her jaw locked, mulling over something, anything at all, to say that might put the Sun Princess at ease. Alas, there was nothing. “I-” Luna opened her mouth and closed it again, trying to formulate her next sentence just right, “I…We, we do not wish to hurtith thou more anymore than what we hast put thee through already, but we feel as if our sisterhood with thou ended long before we were banished.”

Celestia was appalled. “What do you mean?” She asked.

Luna sighed, looking down at her hooves rather than at her sister. “Thou may love us, and us thou, but it hath been long since there hast been sisterhood between us,” she said, even voice wavering ever so slightly. “Long ago, we were not in our right mind. We were desperate, and alone. We needed thy support, but…”

“I wasn’t there for you.” Celestia finished. Luna looked up at her sister, eyes pleading for her to understand, but confusion was still evident on the white mare’s face. “But Luna, that was so long ago, when I was but a foolish filly.”

The dark alicorn nodded, “We thought the same, initially, but since our return, we realize that is not the case. In the thousand years of our banishment, thou hast allowed Equestria to forget about their Princess of the Night, thy very own sister. We were written out of text, our castle relocated and rebuilt without our symbol, and worst yet, we were allowed to fade from even thy memory as nothing more than a myth. The world has changed, yet we are still the villain.”

“Sister…I”

“THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU!” Luna shouted, quickly cutting her sister off. “You expect me act like nothing happened. That I am cured from darkness, but it doesn’t work that way. I was not possessed by the Nightmare, I WAS Nightmare Moon, and now that I am rid of those emotions, I am a shell of my former self, yet you either don’t acknowledge me enough to notice or don’t care, just like a thousand years ago. And I know that it is my fault for not speaking up about how I was feeling all those years ago, but couldn’t you tell?! Didn’t you notice that your own sister was suffering? IS Suffering?” Luna sniffed, “I haven’t felt like your sister since before we became royals, and thus, I don’t know how to be the sister you want me to be anymore. I can’t make you happy.”

“Oh, Luna…”

Tears began to run down the stoic face of the ancient night princess. “I don’t belong here, in this time. I am nothing but a fairy tale. And how am I to atone for the mistakes I’ve made? A thousand years wasn’t enough. I still cause you pain, for I cannot be what I once was. Please, just send me back. Send me back to my moon. Tis the only place we truly fit in…”

The sinking feeling that had been plaguing Celestia was back with a fury, tumbling in her chest. She finally knew what it was: Guilt. She watched as her sister’s body collapsed to the ground, unable to support her through the strain of sobbing. All the older alicorn could think of was ‘I did this.’

Approaching her sister quietly, as if she might spook her, Celestia sat down next to the dark mare, wrapping a wing delicately around her body to pull her sister close. Luna allowed it to happen, turning to cry into the soft coat of the sun princess.

“Lulu,” Celestia whispered, using Luna’s old childhood nickname, “You’re right. I failed you as a big sister. And every day you were gone, your image on the moon reminded me of my mistakes. Maybe that’s why I didn’t tell anyone about you. I was ashamed for what I had done. I thought that it might be the best for you too. I often wondered how things would have been different if I had just…but it’s in the past. Please, let me atone for the sins I’ve committed against you. Let me be your sister again. I beg you to forgive me.”

“Tia,” there was a tenderness to the smaller alicorn’s voice that Celestia hadn’t heard before, “I do, I do forgive you. I love you. Can we start over?”

Celestia gave her sister a teary smile, “Of course, but promise me one thing.”

“Yes?”

“Don’t ever ask me to send you back there again. I need you! Our subjects need you! We can’t bear to lose you again.” Tears began streaming down Celestia’s face, and she too sobbed into the other. “I love you.”

The two Celestial Sisters cuddled there on the floor of the highest tower for what felt like hours after that, just enjoying the beginning for a fresh start with each other. But it was finally Celestia who broke the silence. “Don’t worry about all our little ponies. They will learn to accept you again. But we need you here, sister. Please stay.”

Luna nodded, nuzzling her sister, “Anything for you.”

Celestia then pulled herself and her sister onto their hooves, a devious smile on her face. “Skip the rest of your night duties, just for tonight. Let us play board games and I can show you all that goes on at night too. And in the morning, after I raise the sun, let us go flying together! I know we won’t be able to always be by each other’s sides, with our separate schedules, but let me at least try. In the name of our newfound sisterhood.”

Luna ruffled her wings before allowing them to fall back against her body. “Alright, but only on one condition,” she answered.

The white alicorn looked at her sister skeptically, “and that would be?”

“Race us to the game room!” Luna laughed, taking off in that direction.

Celesita’s smile was almost hysterical as she cantered after her younger sister, giggling as she called out “You’re on!”

So, the two sisters carried on, as promised. Although Luna may not have been granted the rebirth of a new life like she wanted, from that point on she got something even better: a new sisterhood to relish in. The two would still fight and disagree over things, but they always made a point to forgive each other and work things out. They made a pact that the shadow of Nightmare Moon would no longer haunt them. They turned to each other in weakness, and celebrated their strengths. The ponies of Equestria learned to love their Night Princess too, and she them. She inspired them, and in that way inspired herself. That would be Luna’s legacy: redemption, love, and most of all, forgiveness. K`��

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Doctor Disco

Doctor Disco #1 · Jan 17th, 2018 · 1 · ·

I want to begin this comment by saying that the parts that I read are fairly amazing, and the interactions are good, but they could be better.

*cracks knuckles*

I don't want you to take any of this the wrong way, as I will do my best to provide constructive criticism, but if I do offend, I apologise in advance.

Walls of text. No one likes them. The however-many first paragraphs of the story were just so huge that I couldn't help but skim through them at best. I'm sure they were packed with wonderful exposition and prose, and this being a 3.5k story I am proud of you for writing this, but you must understand. No one likes a big block of text that eventually, if the paragraph ends up being stale, will lose their place in the paragraph. Or they won't read it at all.

Here's something you can use to remember when to split paragraphs. Time, Place, Topic, Person. Tip Top.

Sometimes, you can even split one topic into two paragraphs! Almost as if it doesn't have to be a big block of text! /sarcasm

Other than that, there are only a few grammatical and spelling errors I found in what I've read, but I hope you take all this into account. Especially if you're trying to a hook a reader into reading your story. Sometimes, for people who like punctual and to-the-point starts, a goliathan paragraph as the first thing we see is a huge turn off, but your description, title, cover-art and short description were good enough to hook someone like me, who rarely takes time out of his day to read new stories, to read your story.

I'll take time to fully go through it just for you so I can help even a little more. Don't be discouraged, and if anyone tries to attack you as an author through your writing, that isn't criticism, yell back all you want.

Comment posted by SheabeePrime deleted Jan 17th, 2018

SheabeePrime

SheabeePrime #3 · Jan 17th, 2018 · · ·

8675579
Oh thank you! I don't mind the constructive criticism at all! I kinda was wondering about splitting up my big long paragraphs in the beginning, as my style there is more essay like than fic like (college does that to ya lol) but just decided to go with, so I totally get what you're saying. I might change it eventually. But thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I started this piece a year ago and recently put alot of effort into it as to finish it. I'm currently working on trying to strength my dialog skill set. I usually hate dialog which is what gets me into the essay-like block paragraphs. So, that's my justification for the interactions not being what they could, although I appreciate you saying that they were at least tolerable, if not good. Anyway, thank you again. I can tell that you are really into reading and analyzing, like myself, which makes your comment even more valuable to me.

Culture_Shock