• Published 19th Feb 2018
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Princess Essenta - Pone_Heap



Long, long before Equestria, ponies in that land lived in a number of smaller kingdoms. Princess Essenta, the first daughter of the Dale, sets out to prove herself when her father, the king, sends her on a poorly conceived "suicide mission".

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Chapter 2: An Enjoyable Day

The Dale Arc

Essenta sat in a lukewarm tub, as a few of her unicorn attendants scrubbed her in the royal castle bath. Normally, she would have bathed herself, but she was so filthy from her work in the field, an Earth pony had little chance of cleaning herself. After soaking off the worst of the soil, she was made to stand while they continued to scrub and rinse, scrub and rinse…

Finally, she was clean and stinking of perfume, to cover up what her attendants called her “earthly rank”. The earthy smell never left her mane or coat, and they did their best to nullify it.

Old Rosy, her oldest and only Earth pony attendant, began to fiddle with her mane, but there wasn’t a lot to do with it, its even cropped length barely allowing for anything other than down. The same could be said of her tail.

“Princess… you know your father’s been telling you to let your mane and tail grow longer. There’s so little I can do with it! I can’t even put in your headpiece.”

“Oh, piss on the headpiece. I’ll wear the sterling diadem and a half-veil.”

Old Rosy blanched, “Princess! Such language!”

Essenta grinned, bobbing her head away from Old Rosy’s hooves, almost yelling, “Fuck! Shit! Twat! Jizzy hoofkerchief! Cummy mattress! Gobble creature!”

The elderly attendant was horrorstruck, “Essenta! You’re going to give your Old Rosy a heart storm! Please stop.”

The princess chuckled, she could still get Old Rosy to use her given name. She missed that… When she became a teenager, nopony but her immediate family dared to call her just “Essenta”.

“Now, hush, and let me put on your makeup.”

Seeing Old Rosy’s shaky hooves, Essenta gently pushed them away, “Rosy, you do so much for me. Why not take it a little easier? Spend some time with your own family.”

She knew Old Rosy had several sons and daughters and so many grandfoals she couldn’t remember all their names.

“Oh, Princess, you know it’s my duty to serve you. It has been since you were born.”

“Yes, but please relax a little… And I’m sorry for the language. It’s just so much fun to see you freak out.”

“Oh, it’s alright, dear… I know you’re just having a little fun… It may be the only fun you get to have for the rest of the day.”

Essenta considered this; it may be true, “Dear Rosy, I can do the makeup… But I’ll need help with the gown. Nopony knows the best gown for any occasion like you do.”

The old mare looked at her shaky hooves and smiled; she knew the princess loved her and had her best interests at heart, “Very well… but if you have any trouble, there are steadier hooves than mine available.”

While Old Rosy and one of her other attendants chose a gown appropriate for the visiting prince and his family, she applied just a little makeup. A natural beauty, if a little plain, she didn’t really need the stuff, but a little did enough to cover up what few flaws she had.

She wondered what gown would be brought out. While she would never admit it, especially with the front she tried to maintain, she loved to dress up. While simple tunics and even her own armor suited her, it was nice to gussy up occasionally.

Her attendants didn’t disappoint: they brought out a tan, mid-length gown, with minimum ruffles. The things she liked most about it were its ability to hide stains and the fact it in no way hid her athletic physique. She knew a lot of her suitors were already on their way again the moment they saw she was probably stronger than they were.

With her plain, but agreeable diadem in her mane under the white veil and her gown, she admired herself in her mirror. Wowza, Princess! You look pretty good. She grinned to herself. She was ready.


A while later, Essenta went to check on her sister, Calleha. Not overly needy or pitiful, she was still a higher maintenance pony than Essenta. She and her attendants fussed over her ebony mane and hairpiece. She had on a long, poofy blue gown that complemented her pastel orange coat, which was almost the color of Essenta’s mane and tail.

“Looking good, little sister,” Essenta sang from the doorway.

Calleha looked up, “Essenta! Good afternoon… What?”

Eying Essenta’s gown and veil, she did a take and smiled, “Essenta, you look like you’re on your way to a funeral!”

The big sister scoffed, “Oh, I do not! Are you ready?”

A unicorn was finishing up tying her mane back, “Now I am.”

Calleha walked regally to join her sister. Essenta chuckled at her manner. Calleha really knew how to observe correctness. Looking over her younger sister, she was reminded of just how much she’d grown in the last couple years. Almost as tall as her, but not nearly as muscular, she had become a real beauty… Essenta, deep down, did envy Calleha’s mane. It was slightly wavy and had volume. Her own mane was… well, other than the color, which she liked, it was boring. She could have done something with it, but it was so straight, all she could do was grow it out. This was the main reason she kept it shorter, not just because it was practical.

As they came near Abetelles’s room, he emerged in a stately, but practical tunic, “Good afternoon, ladies.”

He took Calleha’s hoof and smiled at her, “My dear sister… who’s your friend, and why does she look like she’s going to a funeral?”

Calleha laughed, “Oh, Abe! I told her the same thing!”

Essenta scowled at him. For as tough as she was, she knew she was no match for him, and it pissed her off a little. Still… he was her favorite brother and she loved him as such, even if he did give her a lot of grief, knowing she couldn’t best him physically. While she had to learn most everything she knew about fighting on her own or in secret, Abe had access to the best teachers in the land.

She tried not to be jealous of him and he never lorded it above her… it was just the way of the world. Admittedly, he’d teach her everything he learned, but only after he had enough of a grasp on it that she couldn’t use it against him effectively. It frustrated her, but she couldn’t blame him. It was the only way to stay ahead of her.

“Ha, ha, little brother… How are you today?”

“Meh. Father set me up with a teacher of the Terran language today…”

Essenta knew this was a sore spot for Abe. While he excelled in most things, he had little gift for different tongues. It was something she was at least decent at. But she wouldn’t give him grief about it. Both sisters and Abe were reasonably intelligent and did well in most of their studies. Their other two brothers, though…

“Durenes, you little bastard! Stop hanging on my leg!”

Calleha shuddered, while Essenta and Abe looked grim. It was their brother Valles, dragging himself along with their idiot brother hanging on him. Neither noticed the other three immediately.

Whether Valles was just naturally stupid, or he took it easy in life because of his position in the world, nopony knew. They did know he was careless, cruel, and lazy on top of being stupid though. He was also physically weak, taking little interest in much of anything involving using his own physical power.

Durenes was… just dumb. The physicians didn’t know what was wrong with him. For some reason, probably because stupidity, carelessness, cruelty, and laziness meant something stimulating for him, he clung to his eldest brother. Essenta, Calleha, and Abe felt it couldn’t have happened to a nicer pair of ponies.

Essenta barked, “Durenes! Get off Valles and behave yourself. We have guests.”

The little unicorn immediately let go and stood at attention. It was widely believed Essenta was the only pony in the world Durenes would listen to and obey. He’d also listen to Abe, sometimes, but only if Abe laid on a little physical persuasion. Abe knew what made the little fool tick.

Valles looked at them, straightening his tunic, “Why, Essenta… you look like you’re going to a funeral… though, if Father likes this one, and you don’t scare him off, you might as well be… your own.”

He laughed nastily. Essenta had nothing to say to this. Valles was an asshole and she knew him to be so. Durenes laughed along with Valles, and Abe cuffed him. That got the little one’s attention and he stood stiff as starch again.

Abe sighed, “Everypony settle down. The Fulco family is a great ally to the Dale. We need their support and we need to stay on good terms.”

Often cutting to the chase, Abe spoke truly. They walked on. Essenta thought a bit. Of course, Father wants to stay on good terms. I’m his bargaining chip. Their mother was presented to King Dale with a large dowry, but whomever Essenta wound up being sent off to, their father wouldn’t be paying anything.

Everypony wanted a piece of the Dale. Everypony wanted to be on good terms with the Dale. Everypony wanted in on the Dale. And there were plenty of Kingdoms out there that would pay 500,000 gold pieces for a princess of the Dale. That much gold was the worth of three years of decent harvests. Their father had two such ponies at his disposal. 1,000,000 gold pieces… that’s what Calleha and I are to him… It was sad, but true. Essenta saw herself on a stage, with kings and princes waving cards, trying to outbid each other.

Essenta had no intention of causing too much trouble for her Father… but she had no intention to marry whatever showed up that day, either.

Upon entering the reception hall, the guards directed them over to their seating… and their parents, the king and queen. King Dale had a majestic cape over his ornate tunic, his crown perched on his head. The queen had a gown that put Calleha’s to shame: it was a cream-colored silk piece of the finest quality. Essenta found herself wondering how many families could have eaten for a month on the value of it…

The king looked over, “Ah, children… welcome.”

Despite his pleasant tone, he glowered at Essenta. Everything about her offended his senses: her manner of dress, her shorter mane, and of course, the look she had in her eyes. She wasn’t afraid of her father… maybe she should have been, but… meh.

The queen gushed over how beautiful Calleha was becoming and how handsome her colts were. Essenta didn’t really give a rat’s ass. Her mother often tried to overlook the things she got up to. In fact, once, when her mother was drunk, she stated if Essenta hadn’t come out of her, she would be hard-pressed to believe she was her filly. The more she thought about this, the more it hurt. She wanted to be closer to her mother but was about as interested in her goings-on as she was a bag of sawdust. Queen Dale was boring.

Fussing, the queen got her children lined up. The Fulco king and his family were soon entering. Essenta didn’t know much about the Kingdom of Fulco, other than they kissed her father’s ass pretty heavily. They were a unicorn family, no surprise, and functioned more as a distributor of goods and produce than an actual producer of anything worthwhile. They were merchants and relied on others to do the heavy lifting. She wondered what kind of candy-assed stallion the 19-year-old prince might be.

She wouldn’t have to wait long; a few trumpeters entered from the hall and blew a reveille. A unicorn stallion in a plain tunic entered among them and read from a scroll.

“On behalf of the Kingdom of Fulco, we are privileged to introduce King Fulco and his queen, and his son, Prince Asklepiades.”

The Fulco family entered. To Essenta’s interest, the prince was a Pegasus, despite his parents being unicorns. It was no big surprise, considering her own family. King Fulco embraced King Dale roughly and was given a hearty embrace in return.

“Ansgar Dale, my old friend! I haven’t seen you in years!”

“Likewise, Leofwine. I suppose the journey was a little long for your other children.”

“Well, my next oldest is sick and the others are really too young for such a trip… but they’re in good hooves. It was hard enough to get Seraphina to come along, but I’m glad she was willing.”

As the queens embraced warmly, and gave pecks on the cheek, Queen Dale gushed, “Seraphina, it’s so good to see you!”

“Hello, Media.”

Essenta knew this was no false show. The families loved each other… at least the adults did. King Fulco served alongside her father in the war. They’d trained together when they were colts and were blood brothers. Queen Fulco was a longtime friend of her mother. She’d met the other queen a few times, but more often, her mother would go visit the Fulco Kingdom to see her old friend. Still… money was the driving factor behind everything happening that day.

While the adults carried on, Essenta heard Valles chuckling nastily about it, with Durenes imitating his eldest brother. She had a mind to give them each a good wallop. She didn’t enjoy this either, but she would at least respect decorum. Just before she was about to lay into them, Abe saved her the trouble. One thing Abe definitely had on his sister was his knowledge of pressure points and locks. The two idiots quietly gasped as Abe pressed his hooves into their kidneys.

Shut up, you idiots,” Abe smiled at Essenta, who smiled in return. She loved Abe.

The colts, in extreme pain, nodded. Abe let go and their brothers staggered. They looked sore, but they weren’t about to take on Abe. Calleha grimaced at the show, wishing her siblings would just take it easy.

At this point, King Fulco came up with his son, “Princess Essenta, I present to you my firstborn son and heir, Prince Asklepiades.”

The prince took her hoof and kissed it, while Essenta curtsied, “Hello, Princess. Please… call me Askle. Just Askle. Prince Asklepiades is a bit of a mouthful, isn’t it?”

Looking at Askle’s roguish grin and his father’s poorly contained anger and embarrassment at the informality, she was charmed. Their eyes met, and it was clear they had the same idea… this could be fun.

“Well, you may call me Essenta then, but nothing less than that… There’s only one pony I let call me ‘Sen’… Another calls me… ‘Captain’, if that pleases you.”

Askle and Essenta tried not to laugh, their cheeks puffing up. But they broke and laughed heartily, though not wildly. Their parents looked on, horrorstruck. Essenta’s siblings were aghast, partly because of their sister’s behavior, but mostly from the look on their father’s face.

Before anything else could happen, King Dale introduced the Fulco family to the rest of his children. Many a “my, how big you’ve gotten”, and “you’re starting to look as beautiful as your mother” were heard. Essenta and Askle stood off to the side, watching.

“Askle, how long were you on the road?”

“About a week. I’m just glad it stopped raining. Until we got to your borders, it was a nightmare.”

“The rain just stopped two days ago, here. Most of the ponies in town are trying to clear weeds from their fields before it starts up again.”

“I’ve never seen such land. It’s little wonder the Dale is called the valley’s breadbasket.”

As the rest of the family sat down, Essenta motioned Askle to join them, “Well, here it goes.”

Askle chuckled, “Yes… Let’s get this over with.”

They all sat, Essenta across from Askle. He waggled his eyebrows at her and she in turn laughed and rolled her eyes. They made silly faces back and forth, much to the chagrin of their families. She didn’t really mean to scare off this prince; they were just having a little fun. Their parents, at once were shocked and not dissatisfied. The royal children were getting along. It was so far removed to Essenta’s siblings though, they could only sit like statues.

Hoping some refreshments would calm things down, King Dale clapped. Food and drink was brought out immediately. Essenta still wasn’t hungry from stuffing herself in the beet field’s weedy patches, but she contented herself with drink.

King Dale began to chat with his friend and their wives, when he noticed what his eldest daughter was up to. She grabbed, to her father and mother’s horror, the large jug of the ale King Dale was so fond of. It was a coarse and cheap beverage that reminded him of his younger days. He had learned recently, Essenta loved the stuff even more than he did.

While she poured herself a large mug of the stuff, he recalled some night two weeks earlier, after a long day of planting. Well, he and his family weren’t planting… except Essenta. She’d been pulling a plow the entire day and wound up going to one of the pubs in town with a bunch of lowly farmers. It wasn’t the first time.

He’d been so angry she skipped her afternoon lessons to associate with their kind, he and a contingency of guards went looking for her. He found her there, drinking one of the town drunks right under the table with the very beverage she now sucked down. Never, in his entire life, even in some of the far-flung places in which he fought, had he ever seen a mare drink like that. His daughter! The First Princess of the Dale!

Against his better judgement, he attempted to have her seized. Instead, she instigated a bar brawl and disappeared while everypony was occupied. The next morning, she was in the field again. It infuriated him, but he could think of nothing to do. If it were anypony else, he’d have them hanged for the trouble she caused.

Askle was also sampling the ale, if by sampling, one meant quaffing. He and Essenta were guzzling the junk, and the rest of the ponies looked on, unable to even exchange pleasantries. This went from friendly to weird quickly, while the rest of them attempted in vain to converse.

Soon, the ale was gone. Essenta hoofed the whiskey she wasn’t so fond of, but would drink anyway, and started pouring drams of the stuff for herself and Askle. At this point, the queens were ready to faint. They got worse and worse as the minutes went on.

Things came to a head when Essenta let out a little burp… not even a big one… and by accident. Queen Fulco ran at that. She ran screaming. It might have been funny if not so catastrophic. King Fulco took off after her. Then Queen Dale took off after both of them. King Dale stared daggers at Essenta, who coolly looked back. She knew she was in for it but didn’t care. What would he do? String her up to a whipping post? With nothing else to do, King Dale went after the other adults.

Essenta’s siblings, save the dummy unicorn looked in raw terror at what had just happened. They’d seen their sister scare away suitors through acts of strength, unpolished behavior, and even by tracking mud in from the fields. But she’d never had that much to drink in front of guests… and ale at that! What’s more, the suitor joined in on her game.

Essenta and Askle looked after their parents, incredulous looks on their faces. Then they threw their heads back and laughed.

Essenta stood up, grabbing the whiskey bottle, “Askle? Want to see the town?”

He stood up, a grin plastered on his face, “Sure. Hell knows what’s gonna happen now. Might as well have a little fun.”

Without another word, the two ambled from the hall, leaving Essenta’s shocked siblings.


“That’s the old mill. Part of it looks new, but that’s because its rafters burned up last year. Lightning strike…” Essenta paddled along, pointing this out to Askle.

He took a pull of the whiskey, “Aren’t you worried about your father? I mean, really! He’s gonna have your hide for this!”

“Meh. Maybe. You just had to play along…” Essenta grinned fiendishly.

Askle laughed at this, “Sure, but I didn’t think things would go that far. You got… carried away.”

They walked through town, and the townsponies didn’t seem to know what to be confused about. Their princess was walking around, getting drunk, with a prince of Fulco. They were in their formal attire, Essenta still wearing her veil. And neither seemed to care.

Essenta considered this, “It’s weird to walk around and have nopony call out to me. I was through here earlier and it was ‘hello, Princess’ this, that…”

“Well, I suppose they didn’t expect to see you staggering through town without an escort.”

“Escort my ass. I’m tougher than half the guards here.”

Askle just about jumped at her language, “Essenta!”

“Well, I am. Just this morning, I was out pulling weeds in a beet field. Didn’t have an escort then.”

“…Pulling weeds?”

“Sure… we Dale folk help each other when we can.”

He was flabbergasted, “But you’re First Princess! You’re 17! Your father wants to marry you off and you’re out working the fields?!”

“What crawled up your ass, Askle?”

That did it. Any attempt at keeping his composure fell apart. Askle guffawed and laughed until he was crying. Essenta looked at him oddly, and this was funnier still. Soon, she found herself joining in. If I could be his queen… I think I could live with that. It was a fleeting thought, for she had an idea.

“Askle, I want to show you something. Come with me.”


“Wow… some view.”

The two royals sat on a grassy knoll overlooking Greendale.

Essenta peered at it lovingly, “I know… This is my favorite spot in the entire kingdom. My friends and I used to play here… we still do sometimes.”

Askle looked over. The princess really was something.

“Essenta… when I came here today, I figured I’d meet some frilly basket case, but… meeting you? It made the whole trip worth it. I’ve had fun.”

“Oh, I’m glad you enjoyed it… I just hope it’s worth the trouble I’ll be dealing with later.”

He smirked, “The trouble we’ll both be dealing with.”

The two of them sat. Neither had fallen for the other or anything, but they had a nice day together. Essenta tipped back the whiskey bottle, a drop falling out. Looking over the fields, it was darkening, and ponies began to stream back into town.

“Well, no reason for this to slow down our day.”

“What do you mean?”

Essenta looked back at him with a glint in her eye, “You’re about to see the second-best thing the Dale has to offer.


“C’mon, Princess! Drink!”

The townsfolk, stunned at seeing their princess trot around town with some prince, magically came out of their collective shells when they got a little alcohol in them.

Essenta was having a chug race with the farmer Vess. Each mug was a good quart. While Vess put up a good effort, Essenta turned hers over first, giving it a hearty slam on the table. The crowd roared. It was a strange sight to Askle… the princess in her stained gown, veil soaked in ale somepony accidentally spilled on her, laughing and embracing her townsponies.

But he didn’t suppose it was that strange. He himself was staggering around in the same territory as she was. He’d never seen a mare able to drink that much. She could probably out-drink him. A Pegasus himself, his metabolism and way his body worked lowering his natural tolerance, he was still astonished she could do it.

Before he knew what was happening, a raucous dance began, with everypony jumping around, happily drunk off liquor and life. The band fired up in the corner. The next thing he knew, he was dancing along with them, across and alongside some gorgeous fillies and mares.

It was the most fun he’d had… well… ever. Soon he found himself with the princess in his arms. Everything quieted down a moment… then they abruptly broke into dance, watched by everypony else. They weaved and bobbed, him flipping her over himself and twirling her. With a jaunt of music, they finished, Askle holding Essenta by a hoof. The crowd cheered while the two of them panted. Their eyes locked, the two of them just about fell for each other. For the first time that day, Askle saw her blush… and it wasn’t just the alcohol.

Spinning loose, to his disappointment, Essenta moseyed over to the bar, “Another mug of ale, please!”

“Sorry Princess,” the bartender shrugged. “Keg’s just about tapped out for the night… can’t get a siphon out of it. Settle for wine?”

Essenta gave him a look to freeze fire and then smirked. She grabbed the wooden keg and dragged it from behind the bar. Ponies gathered around… they had to see this. Askle watched. If he hadn’t fallen for the princess yet, what he was about to see sealed the deal.

After yanking out the spigot, she grabbed the keg and lifted it. It was a feat no other mare there could probably do, even with the keg empty. Hell, some of the stallions there couldn’t have done it either. Bringing the siphoning hole to her mouth, she began to drain the barrel. It took her a minute. Awestruck, and some just plain put-off, they all watched their princess suck down that cask to its last drop.

She finished. Holding the barrel over her head, she let out a thunderous belch that shook the rafters. With a grimace on her face, she threw the barrel down in front of her, where it shattered pleasingly. The entire bar thundered its approval, while Essenta reeled around, receiving hearty congratulations from ponies of every shape, size, and age.


Soon after, Essenta and Askle were staggering away from the bar, the party still going. It was quite late by now, and the sun had long since gone down.

Askle hooted, “Essenta! That. Was. Something else!”

Leaning on him, she giggled, “Yeah… I didn’t think I’d be able to do it. That thing was heavy.

“Not that… Just… this city! That bar! You! Your ponies love you! How… how do you do it?”

She stopped a moment. She’d never thought much about it. She just… loved her ponies, and they loved her. They were her friends. She may have been a princess, and they may have been beholden to call her that, but she was their friend, too. She didn’t think of them as subjects… she thought of them as… family. A big family she would miss terribly the day she was sent off to play queen somewhere.

But she couldn’t put this into words, “I… don’t know, Askle. It’s hard to explain…”

“…”

But she tried anyway, “This is… my home. I never want to leave here…”

Her earnestness moved him.

She went on, “But sometime soon… Father’s going to send me away… He’ll collect his mountain of gold and send me away. I’m… scared. That’s all I am to him… His least favorite child… His wayward daughter… I want nothing more than to stay here… I’ve… been able to scare off everypony that’s come this way with a dowry and… I do it because I’m scared. I was hellbent on meeting you today and driving you off…”

Pacing a little, she sniffled, “So I went out of my way to do it. I’m… not so pretty, and I tried to show that. I was ready to send another suitor packing, but when I met you… I was glad. I was glad to make a friend... if only for the day. After this, we may never see each other again. I wish… I hadn’t caused such a fuss.”

He was wowed by her. He respected her… And… yup, he was definitely falling for her now. He couldn’t hold back.

“Essenta… I came hear today, determined to leave with no prospects of marriage… but… this day with you has been great. And you are beautiful! You look great, even now. And I did have fun! I had so much fun! And for what it’s worth- I’m sure our fathers are just gonna part on bad terms and we’ll be pulled along for the ride- if I had to get married… if you’d be my queen… I’d be more than alright with that."

Taken aback, she investigated his eyes. He looked back into hers, amethyst in color and watery in quality. A sad little smile came to her lips. He meant it. She went close to him.

“I… feel the same way…”

He wasn’t quite ready for this, but he had come to want it. Her eyes went to half-mast and her lips parted a little. They put a hoof on the other’s shoulder and moved in. Their lips almost touched when-

“Princess Essenta! There you are!”

The two split apart instantly and lights flooded on them.

Essenta peered into the darkness, “Captain Lugaid! Hey!”

The Captain of the Guard grimaced at her messy appearance, “Oh, Princess! What have you been up to?”

A Fulco guard came forward, “And… Prince Asklepiades? We’ve been looking for you for hours!”

Essenta beamed blearily at Askle, “Busted, buddy.”

He chuckled, “Yup.”

Then, Essenta stopped laughing.

Askle leaned in, “Essenta?”

Not a second later, he maneuvered away as she violently voided the contents of her stomach into a shrub. Askle held back what was left of her veil, a mixture of horror and amusement on his face.

“Oh, Essenta… Gross.”

The guards groaned and looked on in disbelief. What a night this turned out to be.

Author's Note:

Check out the Appendix for Princess Essenta, updated as the story moves along. It shows the story's timeline and character designs. Contains spoilers.


Oh, that princess... always up to some mischief. Just how will King Dale deal with his troublesome daughter? And what of the Dale-Fulco Alliance?

The princess had her fun and now she will pay for it. Or will she?

I hadn't planned on releasing a new chapter for at least a few days, but it was ready and I had fun writing it. Look for the next chapter in a week or so.

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