Chapter 19: Journey into the Mindscape
Troubles Arc
Essenta, Dechaa, and Loress led Noach to their dwelling. Approaching the little cottage among the trees, they spotted Ama making her way there up another trail. Alarmed at the sight of her friends leading a unicorn to their refuge, she was immediately in a killing mood. Assuming the worst, she figured they may have been hoodwinked or under the unicorn’s control.
Ama drew her throwing dagger, which she was never without, but Essenta called to her.
“Ama, don’t worry. This is Noach. He’s a friend. He’s here to help us.”
Ama halted, “What?”
Loress spoke next, “It’s true, Ama.”
Dechaa added, “I trust him, Ama. Trust me."
The Mazan, most cynical, looked at her friends’ eyes; no magic of the sort she feared left the eyes as they were supposed to be. But her friends’ eyes looked… normal. In fact, they looked encouraged… especially Essenta's.
Ama sheathed her dagger, “Forgive me, Noach. My name is Ama of the clan Waterfall. But one cannot hold my caution against me. As I am sure my companions have told you, the last week has been difficult.”
Noach had never met a Mazan with such etiquette; most of them were assholes, but he could feel a virtuousness radiating from this statuesque mare, “It’s quite alright, Ama. I’m glad the princess and her friends have somepony like you to defend them.”
Ama cocked her head, “Well… Thank you, I suppose…”
She turned her head to their cherished leader, “Essenta. You are still intoxicated. Are you really of sound mind to have led your bartender here?”
Essenta shrunk a little under Ama’s gaze, “…Yes… As Dechaa said, you can trust him. I do.”
Noach couldn’t help but chuckle at Essenta’s nervousness, as well as the other two that led him there. Ama apparently had great respect for Essenta but held her to a high standard. Apparently disappointed with the princess’s shenanigans, she wasn’t just going to let it slide.
Ama turned to Noach, “Sir… Please tell me why you have come.”
He answered, “It may be hard to believe, but I’m a healer. Before opening my pub, I served in the Joeh Army. Joeh was also my home.”
Ama looked apologetic, “You have my sympathy, sir. It was indeed a horrible time… How do you mean to help us?”
He looked back to Ama, “I don’t mean to boast, but I am a skilled healer. I’m also psychic. Don’t fear that fact. I cannot just read somepony’s mind if they are standing in front of me as you are. It takes a more intimate approach… or just enough time.”
For the first time, possibly in the entire week, Ama smiled, “I suppose then, you know Essenta’s life story, even if unspoken.”
Noach chuckled; the Mazan was an interesting young mare, “That wouldn’t be entirely accurate. But I am here to help. I know you’re all in a bad way.”
Ama nodded, “Very well. I think it would be prudent to notify our friends inside we have a visitor before he enters.”
Dechaa walked forward, “Will do.”
After a moment, they entered the cottage.
Dechaa looked a little worried, “Zyra only woke a few minutes this morning. She’s asleep now.”
Essenta sighed, “Let’s just start here, for now. Noach thinks he might be able to help Wilka and Orni.”
Noach approached the two mares, “Good afternoon, ladies. My name’s Noach. I’m a healer.”
Wilka looked a little nervous, “Essenta? Can we trust this guy?”
Essenta was unsure why Wilka became so nervous. But… she had noticed Wilka became apprehensive around stallions she didn’t know... and the rest of them, for that matter. She pushed it to the back of her mind.
“Yes, Wilka. We can trust him. Orni… understand?”
The Knollwing nodded.
Noach smiled, “Don’t talk much, do you Orni?”
Orni blushed a little, showing a shy smile.
Noach addressed the room, “I suggest everypony relax for a time. Maybe get a little something to eat. The afternoon may be taxing… Dechaa… please bring me the sample of the poison you isolated. We may be able to do something about it.”
While the two healers went off, the rest did as they were bidden, and had a small snack. Essenta found herself checking in on Zyra. The mage was definitely sleeping. Essenta sat beside her friend’s prone position and stroked her mane. She so wished she could do something to help her. She couldn’t even feel Zyra’s emotions, try as she did. But she was no unicorn, or otherwise gifted in such perception. Hearing Noach come out of the kitchen with Dechaa, Essenta planted a kiss on Zyra’s brow and joined the company in the sitting room.
The old unicorn sat front and center, “Well, it was no wonder Dechaa couldn’t figure out what this was… it was a synthetic substance. I had to break it down into its ingredients. Even I’ve never seen this. There’s nothing to be done but get it out of your systems. It will take time, but it will happen. As you all have suspected, its purpose was to slow somepony down for a long time… for a ponynapping or something similar.”
The truth stung them, but they’d expected that. At least the young ones would continue to improve. But there was a sliver of good news on top of this.
“Dechaa… a simple concoction to increase their metabolisms would probably knock a week or so off the recovery. Still, it may be a month before they feel normal. They’ll need to exercise and get plenty of sleep, but it will help move things along. Also, they will need to increase their food intake. They need five meals a day, normal sized portions.”
If this was all they had to do, it was at least not bad news. They all felt a little more relieved, especially Wilka and Orni.
Ama nodded to Noach, “Thanks so much. This alone is reason for hope.”
The rest agreed.
Noach considered the group, “I recommend you all remain here for another two weeks. I can check on things again before then and see how it’s going… Now… I’m going to try helping your friend Zyra. Is she still asleep?”
Loress nodded, “She was a few minutes ago. Should I… wake her?”
“Oh, no. Don’t wake her.”
He quietly entered the room. He saw the little mage sleeping. She looked peaceful, but he sensed something very wrong. Approaching her bed, it became stronger. The company looked on as the old healer put his forehead to Zyra’s. He lingered a few seconds. A look of great unhappiness crossed his face and he backed away. Before the girls could say a word, he shooed them out of the room, quickly following them.
Wilka asked, “So, did you cure her?”
Noach smiled sadly, “I just took a quick look into her mind… She’s hurting. You know that though… but it’s bad. I can definitely help, but it won’t be easy… or pleasant.”
Essenta, now mostly sober, “Just tell us what has to be done.”
The stallion turned to her, “I will need help from all of you… It may help you as well. I suggest you all take some time to compose your thoughts and relax. I need a drink.”
Noach poured himself a mug of water. The girls wondered what was about to happen.
“I need you mares to trust me. I’m going to sit down with each of you and enter your minds. You don’t need to do anything, other than try to relax and have a willingness to communicate with me. This will be hard, but it must be done. And rest assured your secrets are safe with me.”
He sat across from Essenta, “I suppose I can call you ‘Princess’, now that our little game is behind us. Please lean forward, Princess.”
She did. He leaned forward, and his forehead joined hers.
Noach walked through the place that was Essenta’s mind. He wasn’t looking for anything in particular; he was just looking around to see what made the princess tick. He’d only caught glimpses in his pub. He needed to do this to see in deeply.
He saw the princess. He saw a pony that… hated what she was. Born a princess, she at once enjoyed her life and sought after something else. It was a very vague concept, the thing she was after, but it was strong. He saw the princess as a little filly, her siblings increasing in number. He saw all the princes she had met, the ones who she befriended and the ones she chased away. He saw her father, a figure most despised by Essenta. Yet… he was her father. She was still beholden to him, in spite of all that. She feared him, didn’t trust him, and part of her hated him.
He saw Essenta, at once struggling and excelling in befriending her subjects. She wanted so much to be their friend, to be their… equal. But there was nothing to change the fact she was born a princess. No matter how much they loved her, she was still up on a pedestal. And this tore the princess apart.
She was desperate for something. And he couldn’t put his hoof on it. Still, he saw the princess happily running out of town, with Dechaa and Zyra in tow. But it wasn’t just happiness he sensed in her. He saw despair. He saw her journey’s progress. He saw the fear, the heartbreak, the joy of new friends.
Standing on the idea Essenta had things more or less figured out or would be able to do so on her own, he pulled out of her mind.
Noach looked the princess in the face, as she shook her head, “You really do need to relax, Princess… or sober up a little more… It didn’t make a whole lotta sense in there, but I think I saw what I wanted to.”
Essenta was too captivated by what she just experienced to ask many questions. The other girls looked on in wonder. To them, this had only taken a few seconds.
He smiled, “Dechaa, you’re next.”
The young healer sat nervously, “Okay. Same drill?”
“Yup.”
Noach found Dechaa’s mind much easier to navigate. Not a simple mare, but much more ordered in her thoughts. He saw much of what he suspected, or at least things that didn't surprise him. He saw her well-meaning, but milquetoast father. He saw her mother. The term “harpy” came to mind. But what stood out the most was the middle child of three siblings. Her brother was a mighty warrior-in-training. Her sister was of a beautiful sort, but not the kind that was the same on the inside.
The middle child was an oddity among the family. She was bookish, compassionate, and a nervous breakdown waiting to happen. She wanted nothing more than to heal others… to help ponies… but she had great self-doubt. She felt overshadowed by ponies around her… especially her best friend. To her, Essenta was… “Sen”. While she criticized the princess for some of the crap she got up to, there was nopony she admired more. But was she a hindrance? The hindrance being Dechaa, in her mind.
He saw her uncertainty upon leaving their home behind, the terror experienced in the Forbidden forest, meeting new friends. Prominent was the knowledge King Dale had probably sent assassins to kill them all. Dechaa’s father was very close to the king. Dechaa wasn’t exactly in denial, but she wouldn’t give in to the idea without proof. The world would make even less sense after that.
Strongest in this area, was the raw horror she felt during the raid. Noach, unable to see it in Essenta's mind for her muddled state, saw the night attack in all its detail. They sure showed the "Fire Breathers" what it was to mess with Essenta's company. The fact she had managed to keep the stallion Zyra was interrogating alive was a horrifying, but very impressive thing.
Noach saw, most of all, her kindness. It radiated from her and it took no deep mindreading to see that. As scared as she was, she loved her friends and would do anything for them. While she relied on them, it was apparent they would be lost without her.
The old healer conjured up the little filly. She looked up at him with her sharp eyes, under her ebony mane. They blinked against her straw coat. There were some things he did want to say to this one.
Oh, young healer… It’s hard to imagine, leaving the home you knew, only to wind up in the place you are now. But don’t be afraid, middle child. And never forget how much Essenta and this company needs you. Without you, they might have been lost, more than once. You are no hindrance, so cast the thought aside.
You have a kind heart, Dechaa Beiren. Never lose that quality. And forgive yourself for what has happened to Zyra. It is indeed a horrible thing, but there is nothing simple about surviving in this world. I know your friends will need you now and in the future. Be there for the princess. She depends on you more than you might think.
Dechaa exclaimed as she came back. That was strange.
“Well done, Dechaa. And remember my words.”
Dechaa nodded. This would have been a lot weirder if they didn’t live in a world where such fantastic things were possible.
It took a moment for Noach to decide who to go with next, but he chose, “Ama… I think I should look at you, next.”
Ama was more nervous than she thought she might be; she didn’t really have any juicy secrets, but still shuddered at the idea of her mind being browsed through.
She sighed, “Very well.”
Unlike the uncertainty and strong yearning, he sensed in Essenta, or the fear and doubt he saw in Dechaa, Ama was different.
She knew her direction. And she wasn’t afraid overall. She’d known fear, plenty of times, but it didn’t cloud her mind. There was a vague apprehension about some things she experienced on the continent, but nothing unusual for somepony who came from across the sea.
Noach saw a little filly grow quickly. Despite her immense strength, she remained grounded. Even when she was able to beat anypony in her queendom, even at a young age, she never became arrogant. She had a thirst to prove herself, but the prudence not to be stubborn. He saw her before the queen of the Mazans, upon her coming of age. Ama wept in thankfulness and pride, receiving her greatsword. The queen accepted her tears, in spite of the culture against such things, as Ama was always forthright in the things she did. Her fellow Mazans were most proud of her.
But what stood out the most in Ama’s mind was something he found rather sad. Ama had spent her life in the spotlight, at the top tier of the Mazans. And for that, she felt she’d never had a friend who just wanted to be her friend for who she was, instead of what she was. She just wanted to be... a normal pony. This melancholy followed her across the sea and for a year following.
While not arrogant, Ama had learned much in her travels. She learned of knowledge and wisdom beyond her own experience and culture and was a better mare for it. Humbled, but not broken, she managed to move along with a decent vision in her eyes. This changed, not necessarily for the worse, upon meeting Essenta’s company. Right away, after befriending them, she knew in her heart those ponies loved her for being Ama, not some berserker champion respected and feared in her own tribe. She was truly happy and while they had a few setbacks and her future was no longer as clear to her, she felt this was the place she was supposed to be.
While Ama was in better shape upstairs than the first two, there were still some things he wished to tell her. As Dechaa had, Ama appeared as a filly. Noach couldn’t help but laugh at the gray-haired little Mazan; she was finally shorter than he was and had an unmistakable confidence in her strange eyes.
Ama, you are a most interesting mare. Despite your great fame and power, you remained humble and willing to learn. This is a sign of great wisdom. You may not think of yourself as a leader, but you can still help your friends. They need your insight.
Also, I’m so very glad you found the friends you were looking for. They are truly a special bunch. I know you will continue to love and protect them.
The little filly, dirty from her training, teared up. She tried to hide her tears, but Noach lifted her chin.
It’s alright to cry, little one. You do so because you understand and appreciate the value of the good things in your life… Don’t be afraid of who you are inside. Don’t fight it, young miss… be the mare you want to be.
While Ama was in the very brief trance perceived by the others, they saw her tears. Before they could react to this, Ama sat up. She smiled at Noach.
“Thank you, Noach. I will try to remember your good advice.”
He patted her hoof, “It’s quite alright, Ama. I think the path ahead of you will come clear sometime.”
Ama sat down among the others.
Noach considered the room: there were three left. He’d thought to go with the Knollwing but noticed something odd. Wilka and Orni were… closely bonded. It was a bond beyond friendship… one beyond love. He felt a distinct, but lesser quality of sorrow from the both, not unlike what he had felt with Zyra. He would enter their minds at the same time… He’d done it before, and in this case, it seemed a good idea.
“Loress… you’re next.”
Loress’s mind was quite unlike any he’d seen before. It was… colorful. Unlike the abstract voids he usually came across, Loress’s mind was a distinct landscape. He wasn’t sure where he was until he saw Earth ponies uprooting trees with their bare hooves. He laughed.
I see… Loress is homesick. But there’s a little more to it than that.
Noach walked around, taking in the sights. It was beautiful; every detail of Terrow stood before him. But he was looking around for Loress. Considering most of the ponies had darker coats and dull hair, finding the vanilla-coated Loress with her shiny black mane would be easy. Also… she was much prettier than any of the mares he saw. Terrans weren’t known for their looks. Most looked average, at best.
He didn’t know if he was looking for a full-grown mare, or a filly. As it turns out, he would see several iterations of the beautiful Loress. At the same time. This, he’d never seen before, but one thing was apparent: Loress had a hard time among her peers.
He saw her as a filly, smaller than the others, with a natural beauty she never needed to culture. She had trouble keeping up with others and was physically much weaker. She had few friends her own age, often spending time with older Terrans. They were the only ones that showed her much kindness.
Other foals mocked her for her apparent weakness, and her love of things beautiful. Despite her affinity for taking care of her father’s stable, she wanted to be a soldier. It was what a Terran was supposed to do, she felt. It was hard, but she didn’t give up. She worked hard, becoming fast.
He saw her as a young mare, still much smaller than the others. Her speed, agility, and even her overall fighting ability dwarfed everypony else, but her power still lacked sorely. She still enjoyed the company of older ponies, often helping the elderly. Her love of beautiful things never left her. And still, she didn’t lose her drive. But her confidence was shaken.
He saw her, just after she turned 17. It was apparent to everypony she was working very hard. She was giving her all and was still not strong enough to become a soldier. It made little sense she even wanted to be a soldier. It was obvious her heart was elsewhere. Despite the support of her parents and younger siblings, her confidence was gone. She left home and wandered.
But she had a glimmer of sureness upon meeting the princess and her friends. She enjoyed being with mares who valued her as a friend, as Ama did. She took on a quiet confidence she seemed unaware of. It made itself known, at least to others, when she kept the most level head the night of the raid. Despite her great fear and revulsion, she was the one that held them together that night.
While all the mares fighting together was the only reason for their victory, they truly would have perished without Loress, giving into despair. The pain she felt, having to restrain Essenta from saving Zyra from herself, was rather unlike anything Noach had seen. Without her reassurance and stout heart, even after escaping the assassins’ blades, the company would have given into fear during the walk to Silas.
Noach could have spent more time in there, but he thought he’d seen enough. He pulled up the little filly, looking up at him with a lack of confidence.
Loress, your story is an interesting, and for lack of a better term, an ironic one. Among your friends, there is no equal in physical strength. Among your own kind, you are an anomaly. You have a gentleness about you I’ve never seen in a Terran. You may never make it as a Terran soldier… Fuck it! Don’t try to be what you think you should be… be who and what you want to be.
Never lose that flappable nature of yours. And never lose sight of the beauty in life. In this world, it may be one of the best things anypony can hold onto. Keep having your tea parties and baking your cakes. When all else fails, a little cheer can make the difference between joy and desolation.
And have a little more confidence in yourself. The princess asked you along for a reason, one she isn’t quite aware of yet, but trust in yourself. You will remember the night of the raid. You kept your wits about you, in a fashion few ponies would have managed. Essenta would have been lost without you, in every sense of the word. She will come to rely on you in ways you may not expect.
Noach pulled away from Loress, and she looked a little woozy. It had taken 15 seconds with her, as opposed to less than five as it had with the rest of them. Noach knew he would be away with the last two for a while. It would possibly be days for him, and a minute to the company.
He approached the two, “I’m going to enter your minds simultaneously. Please try to relax.”
Orni was quite relaxed but Wilka was terrified. Noach put a hoof on Wilka’s.
“I know how scared you must be, but please trust me. It’s the only way I can think to help Zyra… and you.”
Wilka may not have been able to relax, but she tried to open her mind. That was a start.
It had been many years since Noach attempted to work within two minds at once. And it was easier to differentiate between these two than he had seen in any other similar instance. Orni’s mind was fairly calm. There was an odd serenity around him. The loudest overall feeling was her… earnestness. Wilka’s, on the other hoof, looked like a maelstrom. There was a great deal of fear and distrust, much more than he had seen in the other mares. It was unclear what she specifically dreaded, but he’d need to look closer.
While he intended to communicate with both at the same time, he decided to visit Orni first. He’d need her help anyway, once he’d decided how to confront Wilka’s essence. He doubted he’d be able to get in otherwise. Seeing the little Knollwing a distance away, she still had her wings. He knew this wouldn’t be pretty.
But he’d made up his mind to help Essenta and her friends. The glimpse he caught in Zyra’s mind strengthened his desire to do this. He strode over to the little filly.
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8807286
That was my favorite scene as of now.
I just like seeing the broken ones go all german bbq...
And don't worry much about the mindwalking, it still was an ok chapter. Felt a bit rushed, but nothing you could do about that without boring most people to death I guess.
Now as usual, have a great time, get your Baumkuchen and tea, coffee, Grog and maybe a chocolate cake.
8852744
Glad it's been enjoyable. They'll get up to all kinds of craziness.