The Weirdest Job Yet

by That Gamer Over There

Moving Up In The World (PREVIEW)

*11 hours earlier*

It was a usually hot day in Los Santos. The smog from all the pollution was present, but not thick enough to hide the buildings and people of the city. Small specks of black floated around. Whether they were birds, bits of trash, or something else entirely, nobody knew. In the distance, the Pacific Ocean spread out onto the horizon. All this could be seen from the balcony of the Galileo Observatory, where two teenagers were in a viewing area, taking in the sight.

"And you're sure you two can do this?"

Zero Day was a young girl, around 17 or 18 (she didn't know when her birthday was, as she had been abandoned at an early age). She had pale green skin, and a head of slightly messy brown hair, some of which was tied back with a rubber band; she could have used a hair band, but she thought using random stuff was more fun. She was wearing an gray jacket that was a size too large over a light blue tank top which had a yellow power button symbol on it, and a red skirt that hung just above her knees. Her feet, covered by a pair of checked canvas sneakers, were dangling over the ground while she sat on a wall that guarded visitors from a 35 foot drop. Next to her was a cell phone with a line open.

"Come on, have some faith in us! We're ready! We've been ready for a while now!" Despite the evil covering every inch of the city, Zero always had a playful voice that was full of life and joy.

"Faith is for children, Ms. Day. Mr. Weston wants results." said the businessman on the other end "And Mr. Weston may believe you are capable, but if you're still kids. If you fuck up-"

"We won't fuck up." said Turbocharger. Turbo was a guy, about the same age as Zero (like her, he'd been abandoned at an early age, and had no idea what date he was born on). He had brown skin and black hair that spiked forwards and up at the front. His eyes were dark purple. He was wearing a black hoodie under a denim vest with blue jeans. The sleeves of his hoodie were pushed up to his elbows, and both his black hi-top sneakers had a yellow stripe on the side. On the back of his vest was a depiction of a black racing helmet in front of a cross made from a wrench and a piston. He was leaning on the wall that Zero Day sat on, and spoke to the cell phone that lay between them. "We've never fucked up. You know that."

"Expect that time Mr.Galante caught you."

"We still got away with it!"

"He tracked you down two hours later."

"Ok, once." Zero interjected "We messed up once, but that's still better than anyone else."

"In any case, the package is on the move, and will reach Portola Drive shortly."

"I don't suppose you'll tell us what's... you know... in the package?" Zero asked.

"With the amount you're being paid, you don't need to know. Good luck."

"We don't need it..." Said Turbo as he leaned in close to the phone"...we make our own luck."

"Mr. Charger, is that one of your famous movie quotes?"

"Actually, that one's from a video game."

There was a long silence. Turbo and Zero glanced at each other.

"...just call me when you get the package." The phone beeped to indicate the end of the call.

Turbo picked up the phone and put it in his pocket. "Well, I guess Weston likes assholes, otherwise it'd be weird that he keeps hiring them."

"What happened to the last one? Molly, I think her name was?" Zero asked as she jumped down from the wall.

"Don't know, don't really care. Probably flew off somewhere."

The pair walked to the parking lot where Turbo's car was waiting. It was a race yellow Elegy Retro, and one of the fastest cars in San Andreas. Under the nearly-two-decade-old body were the best and most expensive parts that could be fitted to it. The roof had a vent and a spoiler which complimented the high carbon spoiler on the trunk. At the front there was an extreme performance hood, a set of xenon lights, and an intercooler so big that the bumper mesh had to be removed. The extended front splitter, drift skirts, and bumper just above the carbon diffuser and twin chrome-exhausts were covered in brand names, and the chrome rims were hugged by custom Atomic tires. Because of the rocket and black tear on both sides of the car, the local street racers named it "The Yellow Rocket". It was such a clever and imaginative name that Zero renamed the car "The Nuclear Banana", which ended up as the name Turbo called it, too.

"So, what do you think the douche wants us to grab?" Turbo asked as he started the car.
"I don't know" Zero put on her seatbelt "Maybe it's a list of cash houses."

They looked at each other for a moment. Then they burst out laughing.

"Guy like that? Yeah right, like he'd want something that makes sense." said Turbo "Wait, what's a cash house again?"

"It's where people count their money when they don't want it in the bank."

"Ah, right."

The car pulled out of the parking lot and began making its way to Portola Drive in Rockford Hills. It was moving at a pace where most people would be screaming their head off, but Turbo made it seem like a gentle cruise in an expensive luxury car. Turbo had always been good with cars. Building, driving, racing, stealing, you name it, he could (and probably did) do it. He could drive any car, in any fashion, at any speed. Cars were Turbo's specialty, after all.

"You know what this means, right?" Zero asked.

"That we're moving up in the world?" Turbo twitched the wheel as they went through an intersection. "Yeah, I suppose we are."

"Isn't it great?" Zero pushed the back of her seat all the down and stretched out. "We're making a name for ourselves."

"I thought we already have. Everyone on the racing scene is intimidated by me..."

"...and I'm always winning hacking competitions and messing with the big corporations, yes. But this is different!" Zero sat up and looked Turbo with bright eyes. "We're making serious money now! If we keep getting jobs like this, we might be able to to retire at 30!" Zero paused to watch the dials on the glovebox as their needles went up and down "Crazy when you think about how we started out."

Turbo chuckled. "From stealing wallets and food to survive to getting hired by billionaires to steal stuff from gangsters. Sounds like a good book."

"Yepperdoodle." Zero played with Turbo's cheek before she laid back and watched world go by, going over the plan in her head. Turbo went back to driving.

---

In a matter of moments, the car parked across the street from the Posonbys on Portola Drive. Being the most well-known shopping district for the rich on the West Coast, it was covered in tourists, paparazzi, and expensive cars. In fact, there were a bunch of kids and teens (Zero guessed three-fourths were younger than 12) screaming their heads off all round two particular white cars, a supercar and a six-wheeled truck. Among the kids was a group of typical internet celebrities, all wearing the same sort of "designer" clothes that were really just regular clothes with company logos on them.

"Ah, shit, it's that fucking trust fund turd." Turbo said while closing the car door.

"Paulo Rice." The name rolled off Zero's tongue with barely concealed disdain. She had seen some girls at LSH pining over his videos. They all just adored him. Personally, Zero just wanted to stuff his face in a toilet. All he and his little posse of rich kids seemed to do was pull dumb and annoying pranks, endanger everyone around them, flaunt their parents' cash, and generally be an all around douches. They even made some songs, all of which were just shitty raps about how "cool" they were. There were very few people in existence who could make Zero so mad. "Why do those airheads have to be here today, of all days?"

"They don't deserve those rides" said Turbo.

"Well, I don't know about that." Zero said,"I mean, they probably worked hard for them."

Turbo gave her a hard look as they jogged across the street "Z, do you realize what you just said?"

"Yes, and now I would like to go home and wash out my mouth with soap."

"Well, too bad, 'cause we gotta do this job first."

"We've got hours until nightfall." Zero pointed out, "plenty of time to go home and back."

"But you said the package could leave at any minute." Turbo said. The two started walking towards the southern corner of the building, away from the crowd.

"Don't worry, though. I'm sure we'll find something to distract us into the meantime." They walked around the corner and got ready to climb the building. "And for the love of God, don't actually put soap in your mouth this time."

Zero said nothing and walked up to the wall with Turbo. She was about to start climbing when something clicked in her mind.

Something to distract...

Zero went back the corner and peeked around it. Rice and his lackeys were now taking selfies for their social media.

"What are you doing?" Turbo asked, removing his hand from the wall. Zero turned toward him with mischevious look on her face.

"I've had an idea." she said. Turbo raised an eyebrow and looked around the corner. A small smile appeared on his face as he realized what she was thinking.

"Oh, this oughta be good."

---

"You know what you're gonna say?"

"Yeah."

"Alright, let's do this."

Zero and Turbo put on their masks and walked around the corner to find the Internet celebrities starting up a live stream. As soon as they did Rice and his crew started yelling out to the camera and the crowd behind them. Somehow, the kids around him started yelling even louder.

"Hey, what's up Ricers, today we're-"

"THE NAME'S TAKEN, DUMBASS!" The entire crowd turned to Turbo "AND I GOTTA SAY, REAL RICERS ARE WAY BETTER THAN THESE LITTLE SHITS!"

Rice walked to the front of the fuming crowd and held his hand up for silence. "Hey, do you know who I am?! Do you?!" He yelled.

"YEAH, WE KNOW!" Zero yelled "YOU'RE JUST SOME TALENTLESS, SPOILED BRAT HANGING AROUND WITH OTHER SPOILED BRATS ON THE INTERNET!"

Even from this distance, Zero could see his face turn bright red. "Don't make me come over there!"

"OR WHAT?! YOU GONNA THROW DADDY'S MONEY AT US?!"

"MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST GO HOME TO THAT GIRLFRIEND OF YOUR'S!" Turbo yelled "OH WAIT, SHE LEFT YOU FOR A PAPER SALESMAN!"

"Motherfucking..." Rice turned to the crowd and pointed at the two masked teens. "GET THEM!"

The crowd started running towards Zero and Turbo, screaming bloody murder. After a moment's surprise, the two panicked and ran back around the corner. The crowd followed them, only to find absolutely nothing. Rice soon came around the corner, as well.

"Where the hell did they go?!"

"Seriously?" Zero muttered. She was watching the kids from the top of the building. "Why doesn't anybody ever look up?"

"No idea." Turbo responded as he climbed over the edge of the building. Despite the fact that Turbo was the one with more muscle, Zero was always the better climber and parkourist. Perhaps because she was a bit smaller than him, and therefore more nimble.

"Look!" The pair looked down when one of Rice's posse pointed towards an opening down the street. The crowd ran into the alleyway, which had a bunch of guys in black suits in it who immediately moved to stop it.

"Hey, hey, hey, you can't be here!" Yelled one of the guards. Naturally, the rabid fans didn't listen. An argument broke out as the kids started fighting with the guards.

"Alright, let's see if my plan worked." Zero and Turbo ran across the rooftops until they were just past the middle of the alley and looked over the wall on the edge. They saw a lot more guards protecting a black van. Noticing the commotion, most of the guards ran over to help, leaving two near the building they were on land one on the other side of the alley. Turbo stepped onto the wall and held out his hand to Zero.

"You ready?"

Zero looked back to the fight. Just as she'd assumed, the guards wouldn't pull their guns on a bunch of kids, but the kids weren't about to back down anytime soon.

"Hell yeah." She turned back to Turbo and took his hand. He pulled her up onto the wall, and together they jumped on the two guards. The guards' heads slammed into the ground. Turbo's guard was knocked out instantly.

"Hey!" The remaining guard reached into his jacket and began pulling out his gun. Before he had the chance to fire, Zero pulled out her taser from her jacket and fired it at him. The guard shook from the electric shock and fell over, his gun sliding to the middle of the alley, right behind the van. Zero looked back at the fight.

Alright, nobody noticed anything. Good. But as Zero got up, she felt something grab her leg. She yelped and looked down. The guy she fell on was staring at her, groaning. One hand was gripping her ankle, while the other was raising a gun to point at her head. Turbo reacted unnaturally quickly, grabbing the gun arm and twising it, making the guard drop the gun, which Turbo caught. Zero recovered from her initial shock and kicked the guard's head. The guard lost consciousness.

"Well, that could have gone worse." she said.

"Could have gone a bit better, though." Turbo replied. He looked down at the gun in his hand and, with a bit of hesitation, put it in an inner pocket on his vest. He went over to the van and picked the lock until he noticed Zero sitting next to him and giving him a weird look.

"What?"

"The gun."

"Oh, that." Turbo went back to lockpicking,"Well, we're gonna need to get ourselves some real weapons eventually. Might as well get them sooner than later, right?"

"But..." Zero was worried. Her best friend had never shown interest in lethal weapons before. They had decided soon after they met that they wouldn't kill people. It just wasn't worth it.

"I thought we agreed to never kill anyone. Ever."

"I know, it's just..."

"What?" Zero put her hand gently on his shoulder. "What is it?"

Turbo once again stopped picking the lock and turned to Zero, this time with a look that said he was ready for an argument. His expression softened when he saw Zero's concerned face. He looked away.

"Shit's changed, Z. We're not stealing spare change anymore." Turbo turned back to Zero. "We're in the big league now, remember? Can't survive the big league with stealth, stun guns and martial arts. These guys, they're ready to kill in an instant. We can't be prepared for anything less.

"I guess you're right..."

Turbo put his hand on Zero's shoulder with a smile. She looked at him and smiled back. Their relationship had always been like this. Always comforting each other. Always pointing out when the other did something wrong. Always holding each other. Always smiling at each other. They were best friends, but Zero felt like there was something else there. It was what gave their bond strength, but she couldn't quite put her finger on what it was. She looked at the arms between them, each belonging to one, but holding the other.

---

Here I am. Here you are. I'm here for you. You're here for me. All of that has been true for as long as we've known each other. And none of that will ever change.

---

Zero almost laughed at herself. It sounded like something out of one of her animes.

"That's right, get out of here!" Zero's thoughts snapped back to reality. She peeked around the van. The crowd had dispersed, and the guards were returning to their original positions. Zero went back behind the van, her heart starting to race.

"They're coming back!" She whispered. Turbo's expression hardened again as he turned back to the lock. Two seconds later, it was open. There was nothing in the van except some computers. Zero hopped in and looked around.

"Blue laptop." She muttered to herself. "Blue laptop, blue laptop... Ah ha!" She found the computer and plugged in her flashdrive. After it automatically decrypted the numerous passwords on the laptop, Zero set the flashdrive to download all the files. A progress bar appeared, and quickly began filling up.

Come on, come on Zero thought to herself. She could hear footsteps getting closer. The computer beeped, telling her the download was finished.

"Yes!" She pulled out the flashdrive and put it in her pocket before getting out of the van. "Cha-Ching!"

"You didn't cha-ching fast enough." Turbo said. The guards were right on top of them. As Turbo said that, the guards noticed their unconscious colleagues and pulled out their weapons. "Do the thing!"

Zero pulled out her phone and went into her encrypted "hacking menu". She selected "NO NIGHTLIGHT" and triggered it.

There was a loud power-down noise as everything within two square blocks shut down. The guards yelled out as the lights disappeared. Thankfully, because of all the nighttime sneaking they'd done over the years, Zero and Turbo could see just fine. They ran back to wall and climbed up as fast as possible. The guards turned on their flashlights just as Turbo went over the wall and out of their sights.

"Okay." Said Turbo, breathing a little heavier. "Let's not make a habit of having serious discussions in the middle of enemy territory."

Zero and Turbo both laughed loudly before panickingly covering their mouths. They peered back over the wall. The guards were still looking around on the ground for them. They high-fived, ran across the rooftop, and jumped down to the street. The lights came back on just as they were getting in the car.

Zero sighed and dug her head into the headrest. "And now we have to go see Weston. Crap." She was not looking forward to meeting that rich creep.

"Actually, I was thinking I'll drop you off at home, and I'll go alone."

"Really? You sure you're ok going alone?"

"Hey, better than you going alone." Last time they had met Weston, he said some very inappropriate stuff to Zero. If Turbo hadn't pulled her away, she probably would have tased and beat the living crap out of the elitist prick.

"What, do you want to meet him?"

"NO! Nonononononononononononononononopleasetakemehome."

Turbo chuckled. He put the car into gear and drove east, away from the shopping district and towards home.

"I'll pick up some Cluckin Bell on the way back. Or maybe Up-N-Atom."

"Please do. Oh, I almost forgot!" Zero turned to Turbo and gave a mock bow. "A very good job, Master Charger." She said in her best fancy voice.

"And to you as well, Ms. Day."

---

"Zero-chan! Zero-chan!"

Zero looked away from the tv. She was sitting in the orphanage common room, playing a story video game about a zombie outbreak. She was alone aside from some of the younger orphans who were playing Une. She turned to see IdolPendant jogging toward her. Idol was the adoptive daughter of Dragonfist, the owner of the orphanage (he had married her mother; there was apparently some crazy story about yakuza and 10 billion yen that led to that, but there was never any time for it to be told). She, like her mother and Dragon, had yellow skin. Oddly, although her mother's hair was dark brown, Idol's hair color was black, like Dragon's, and mostly straight. She was wearing a bright blue track top with black yoga pants. When her parents traveled between Japan and America (which was very often) Idol usually went with them.

"Hey, Idol, what's up?"

"Galante-san is here, and would like to speak to you." She replied in a slightly high pitched Japanese accent.

"Galante?" Frank Galante was the local mob boss. When she and Turbo stole his car a few years earlier, Zero had expected him to have them killed. Instead, he saw their potential and put them to work for him. It was Galante who had gotten them a place in Dragon's well-funded and homely orphanage. Galante was pretty nice, often spending long periods of time chatting with the pair when they came to report on a job. Still, it was unusual for him to come to the orphanage. "What does he want?"

"I do not know. He only said to bring you and Turbo-kun."

"Turbo isn't here. He's getting our payment." Zero checked the clock on the wall. It was two hours past the time Turbo said he'd be home.

He said he'd pick up food on his way back. Maybe he went somewhere really busy?

Zero pushed her concerns to the back of her mind and got up. She began walking to the main entrance with Idol. She doubled back to turn off the game.

In the entrance hall, Frank Galante and Dragonfist were waiting for them. The two couldn't have looked more different. There was Galante, with his white hair (from age, not genes) and his tailored black suit over his little body. Then there was Dragon, his muscular body covered in a gray leisure suit with a red shirt, and his large, slicked back head of hair. The two men turned when the girls approached.

"Zero. How are you doing, kid?" Galante said in his gravely voice. He held his hand to Zero, who took it with both of her own.

"I'm fine, thanks." Zero remembered that Galante had wanted to see Turbo as well. "Actually, I'm not fine. Turbo was supposed to be home a couple hours ago. Do you think-"

"Turbo's okay, kid. I spoke to him just now on the phone. There was just a small problem with your payment, that's all."

"Oh, good." Zero felt a burden lift off her shoulders. "I thought he might've been in trouble, you see, and... Wait" The burden came back down "what's wrong with the payment?"

"Apparently, Weston had decided to pay you two with a car. Turbo wanted cash."

"Well, yeah, it's easier to split the money when it's just a bunch of bills. I guess you'll have to wait for your cut until we sell it. Uh, if that's ok with you, I mean." As friendly as he was, Zero had to keep in mind that Galante was still a mobster. It wouldn't be a good idea to do something with his money without asking.

"It's fine. But honestly, you'd think a gear head like him would be happy to be given a luxury car."

"Luxury isn't really Turbo's style." Dragon said with his deep, Japanese voice.

"Indeed." said Galante. "That boy loves his tuners. Turbo took it, though. He's on his way here now. By the way, he said to tell you that he got Cluckin Bell."

"He knows I like chicken." Zero replied. Then she realized the conversation was getting sidetracked. "So, what's going on? It's not like you to come here, Mr. Galante."

"You're right, it's not. There's some business we need to discuss." Galante turned to Dragon and Idol. "Sorry to ask this in your own building, but could we have some privacy?"

"Of course." Said Dragon, "Come long, Idol. I need help with some paperwork." Idol pouted, but she walked away with her father anyway.

"Sit down." The old mobster and the young hacker sat in some poofy chairs near the door. "Something's come up. You remember Veto?"

"Yeah, I remember him." Zero hadn't really talked much with Galante's right hand man, so she didn't know much about him. All she did know was that he'd been with Galante in jail, and that when Veto got out, Galante had him and his friend Smoothtalk made and brought into his family.

"Well, he has this contact. Government agent. IAA or something. We've made a lot of money off this guy. Yesterday, he calls up Veto, says he needs him and some other people to meet him in a facility up north for a job. Massive payout, much bigger than anything he's given us in the past."

Zero was both surprised and unsurprised to hear that the Galante family had a IAA contact. On one hand, she din't think the IAA would associate itself with an organization like Galante's; not because she thought they were the true good guys who fought against all evil or something stupid like that, but because she didn't see the point. On the other hand, with their power, it would make sense for the Galante family to have someone in government. However, there was one thing that none of those things answered.

"Okaaaaayyyyy... But what does that have to do with me and Turbo?"

"Well, here's the thing. The guy didn't tell Veto anything about the job. No when, where, or why. The hint he gave was that he needed another person aside from the crew. And that this person needed to be a teenager, one who's used to the life."
Galante gestured towards Zero. She almost asked why the contact needed a teenager, but realized that she would be asking the wrong person.

"So, you recommended one of us?"

"No. I recommended both of you." Galante leaned forward in his seat. "The two of yous have been through a lot together. In my experience, nobody can hire one without getting the other. It's like Veto and Smoothie, but even more so."

"And what did he say?"

"It took a bit of explanation, but he agreed that it'd be best if there was two teens rather than one. Backup, and all that."

"Do you have a place for this meeting?"

"I do. But it's not really the kind of place that has an address. I'll send the details to Turbo."

"A time?"

"In a couple hours, but the location's near Paleto Bay, so you'll need to leave as soon as Turbo gets back."

Just then, they heard the unmistakable sound of the Nuclear Banana pulling up in front of the building.

"Speak of the devil." Galante said. He slowly started to get up, grunting a little. Zero jumped out of her chair and helped Galante. The two walked out of the front door.

Author's Note:

This isn't everything I've written so far, but this is the first half of the chapter that's technically completed. My plan is to finish up the whole chapter, then come back and work out some of the things I felt could use work, like how Zero doesn't have as much characterization as Turbo.

Comments

[dereturd]

Holy crap, the talk Zero and Galante had sounded like a Doomsday Heist mission or a Gunrunning job.

Although, people do say GTAO is a prequel to GTAV. So it’s not likely. Either way, good job!