• Published 25th Jan 2018
  • 20,782 Views, 9,163 Comments

XCOM: Ranger - Wanderer D



Sunset Shimmer escapes Equestria... with unforeseen consequences.

  • ...
57
 9,163
 20,782

PreviousChapters Next
Chapter 168: Absence

Ranger

Chapter 168: Absence

By Wanderer D

Jenny had refused to eat, sleep or even engage in conversation with anyone ever since she had been let out of the nurse's office. It was understandable. Her parents were gone, she couldn't remember the names or addresses of any family members and she had been dragged into a strange place, surrounded by many strange people that came out of the nightmares of the news networks.

With Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo currently engaged in meetings with the higher ups, Luna and Laetitia had tried to talk to her, but she had only huddled away and refused to talk to them at all. She didn't know them. And so, they had turned to the pony.

Because apparently unicorns could make little girls feel better. Or something.

When she was a filly, Stalwart Stand, one of Celestia's noble friends had died. He was old, and it was a natural death, he simply had fallen asleep and not woken up. He had passed away surrounded by ponies that loved him, and he had been visited the previous night by Celestia herself.

Sunset had known Stalwart relatively well. He was gentle, and would wiggle his eyebrows at her when he caught her staring. The old unicorn had taught her a thing or two about magic as well, little shortcuts they taught him at the academy, which foals shouldn't know about for some reason or other.

Celestia had talked to Sunset the night before he died, and somehow, her words at the time had been enough, in a way, to not break down and wail at the sudden absence.

Now, staring at the lonely girl in the corner of the barracks, Sunset really wished she could remember what her adoptive mother had said. She always knew how to handle these situations.

And still.

This wasn't an acquaintance. Her parents had been murdered by a psychotic AI. For all her magical, tactical, and martial knowledge, Sunset knew one thing for sure: she was not prepared to deal with this.

Still, she had to try.

"Hey, Jenny…" she began, sitting down across from the girl and immediately feeling inadequate for this kind of situation. "The others tell me you haven't eaten anything yet."

"I'm not hungry."

Well. The girl had spoken at least.

Sunset stared at the girl, while she just hugged her knees closer. Was she supposed to hug her? She didn't know the girl's parents at all. It's not like she could do a Mox-like epitaph.

'I'm good at making things bleed, dammit! Not fixing emotional issues!'

"They're dead, aren't they?" Jenny asked, raising her eyes above her knees for a moment. She looked so vulnerable, so desperate for reality to be different; to be comforted, to be assured that things would be okay. That she could have some hot cocoa with whipped cream.

Sunset knew, right then, that this was a mission for Fluttershy. But the rebel leader was in India.

"Yeah," Sunset said with a sigh. "I'm sorry."

Jenny sniffled.

'Shit. Shit. Shit.'

"Why did they have to die?" Jenny asked, her voice a whisper. "Why did they tell me to run with Sweetie? Why didn't they stick with us?!" the girl's voice rose and she looked at Sunset, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Why aren't they here?!"

'Because I'm too weak.' "It's—" Sunset bit her lip. What could she say?

A familiar hiss interrupted them, and they both looked up to see Angel, half her face covered in gauze, slowly slithering their way.

"Angel, you shouldn't be up yet!" Sunset said, standing up in surprise.

"Hiss."

"Well, if they said that you should stay put, it meant the exact opposite of what you're doing!"

"Hiss."

"But you—"

"Hiss." Angel winced as she shrugged, but slithered past the now unresisting Sunset and coiled next to Jenny, slowly stroking the girl's long hair.

Angel hissed again, and Sunset sighed in exasperation, sitting down across from them. Jenny was glancing from her to Angel and back to Sunset, clearly confused.

Angel hissed curtly at her Captain, and as instructed, Sunset translated.

"Angel says that there is no good answer ever to losing someone you love to something as mindless as what happened."

Jenny was wide eyed, staring at them both as the hissing continued.

"When kin-people are taken away from us—like your parents, or her sisters, or my friends—we are left behind with-with an empty hole in us. They are missing from our lives now, and we cannot take comfort on their touch or physical presence.

"Many of us have learned to accept this as life. Some carry on with the good memories; the songs, touch, advice and laughs. Some choose to grieve and don't get over it. Others take grim resolve, internalize that pain and make it fuel for them to carry on, regardless of the good or bad.

"The way people die often doesn't make sense. It shouldn't have happened as it did for them, for her sisters, or my friends. They were taken away in one moment, without leaving us a chance to understand that it was happening. We couldn't say goodbye. We could stand by their-their resting place as they calmly faced the unknown.

"But your parents did the most noble, and most selfless and most loving thing in the world: they made sure you could go on. That you would live. It might be strange to you right now, and it hurts, but within you, you carry their legacy… their wishes for you to carry on and grow and make the best of everything that you could in the future.

"The place in your heart for them is not going to ever go away, it'll never fully close, but it can be filled with the memories you cherish of them. The perfect moments and the knowledge that all they want is you to grow well and happy.

"I never thought I would find friends. Or fill the hole left from the deaths of so many of my sisters. I never thought I would have a new home. Or that I would remember the nest mother's songs, or learn to—"

Sunset looked down. "Or learn to love anyone. But I found all that because I remembered what they wished, and took their sacrifices into myself not as a sign of despair, but love. It will hurt for a while, little one, for a long while. But you won't be alone."

Silently Jenny crawled into Angel's coils and hugged the viper. Very gently, Angel returned the gesture, hissing softly, almost crooning and stroking Jenny's back.

Jenny was still crying, but it was muffled and less desperate.

Sunset sat back, closing her eyes, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Some leader she was, when she couldn't even help a little girl open up.

Jenny's issues weren't solved, of course, but now she could talk, now she would have an easier time opening up to the professionals.

All it took was a giant, sexy snake. Sunset had been mostly useless.

Angel could deal with things like this.

Celestia could deal with things like this.

Fluttershy could deal with things like this.

Twilight would have known what to do.

'But me?' She shook her head and clenched her fist. She could only kill. And she needed the strength to do that. It was all in the book. Sonata was right.

o.0.o End Chapter 168 o.0.o

PreviousChapters Next