• Published 23rd Dec 2017
  • 3,461 Views, 110 Comments

Bacon and Egghead - shortskirtsandexplosions



Sunset Shimmer and Twilight Sparkle go out on their first date.

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"... ... ..." Sunset Shimmer repeatedly stabbed her half-empty glass of Dr. Pepper with her straw.

"... ... ..." Twilight Sparkle twiddled her thumbs.

"... ... ..." Sunset's eyes traced the edges of the window frame.

"... ... ..." Twilight gazed at the families and random patrons gathered at the far end of the cafe.

Silence...

Even more silence.... ... ...

Slowly, Sunset lowered her face to the glass. Her lips pursed around the straw and she sluuuuuuuuurped at the sugary soda. Immediately, the booth resonated with an obnoxious bubbling noise. Sunset winced, and she swiftly removed her mouth from the straw, sitting back up with a parched expression on her face.

Twilight hummed quietly to herself. She picked up her mittens, unfolded them, refolded them, then placed them back on the tabletop. Fingers drummed on the edge of the table—instantly regretted the thumping noise they made—then retracted to a demure spot in Twilight's skirted lap.

"... ... ..."

"... ... ..."

Sunset Shimmer's eyes swept a daring path across the table-top, settling on one of the many glittering spots along the upper hem of Twilight Sparkle's dress.

Twilight Sparkle's gaze courageously sliced its way up until it traced the golden "lightning bolt" majestically ribboning its way through Sunset Shimmer's scarlet hair.

A twitch of the pupils, and turquoise met violet.

"!!! !!! !!!" Twilight looked at her hands.

"!!! !!! !!!" Sunset looked at her Dr. Pepper.

Silence.

The speakers overhead switched tracks—from pop music to country pop music.

Sunset winced.

Twilight squirmed.

At long last, there was a breath...

...a shuffle...

...and Sunset looked up.

And then Twilight.

A smile crookedly formed between them...

...until Sunset dared to open her mouth first—

SWOOOOOSH! "Hi, again!" Pinkie Pie slid back into view, forcing both ladies to lock-up in their seats once more. "Refills?"

Twilight wrung her hands together.

Sunset gripped the table.

"Yes?" Pinkie smiled and blinked, blinked and smiled. "No?"

Shaking heads.

"Okie dokie lokie!" She glided off on invisible roller skates. "Keep on keepin' on, you two Juliets!"

As she drifted away, Twilight Sparkle suddenly smiled. "Heehee..." Her voice lilted slightly. "'What's in a name?'" She gazed over the rim of her glasses. "'That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.'"

Sunset looked at her blankly. "Huh?"

Twilight blinked. "Oh..." She blushed, looking guiltily away as she pushed her glasses back up. "That's right..."

Sunset's eyes darted left and right. She thought and thought and thought—"Iambic pentameter?"

Twilight nodded. "Mmmhmmm."

"There's..." Sunset winced, rubbing the back of her neck. "He has a name..." Gulping hard, she bravely threw a guess across the table. "Flankspeare...?"

"Heeheehee..." Twilight drew a violet bang over her ear. "Close enough."

"I..." Sunset shrunk a little in her seat. "I pay way more attention to my math and science classes."

"Uh huh. It's okay."

"I-I-I mean, English is fun, but... b-but having to cram nine and a half entire grades' worth of culture and literature into a single semester in between school days just to fit in and look sane is hard enough—"

"It's alright, Sunset!" Twilight exhaled. "I understand. It's just a quote."

Sunset bit her lip. Her eyes darted again... and at last she murmured: "'And every little bitty choice you make sends you down a path to who you are today. So let's take a little trip down memory lane and see just what the past has to say.'"

Twilight cocked her cute head aside upon hearing that. "That's... kinda poignant, actually. Who wrote it?"

Sunset leaned back with a relaxed smile. "Sir Duke Jump Saltlicky," she said. "From his magnum opus: 'A Hearth's Warming Tail' It's a holiday favorite back home... I-I mean back in Equestria." She gulped, then gestured at the wintry world darkening outside. "Guess I couldn't help myself..."

Twilight smiled. "You celebrate Christmas back in Equestria?"

"No. Well..." Sunset rubbed the back of her neck. "...admittedly, there's a lot of haunting similarities. But whereas your winter holiday is very religious-based, ours is more like a snow-capped July Fourth."

"Equestrian Independence?"

"Kinda, yeah." Sunset nodded. "Hearth's Warming is all about the various races of ponies coming together in friendship to found Equestria. There's a whole lot of singing." She snorted, breaking into a smile as her eyes rolled. "And I do mean a lot of singing."

"Singing ponies." Twilight nodded. "I would love to see that."

"Heh. No you wouldn't."

"Awww..."

And, at last...

...silence returned.

Sunset looked aside, biting her lip slightly. The moment had passed so swiftly, and yet the warmth of it remained, trailing off her shuddering limbs. In a desperate attempt to sustain it, her voice lunged: "I... uhhh... uhm..." She pointed a shaky finger. "I like the mittens."

"Huh?" Twilight sat in her shiny dress with petticoats and sequins. Her eyes darted down to the discarded articles in question. "Oh! Yes! I... uhm..." A trailing smile. "I guess they are pretty... pretty."

Sunset was already wincing. "N-not to say that the rest of it isn't... y'know... wow."

"Uh huh—"

"And I mean..." Sunset sported a goofy grin, waving jazz-hands. "WOW."

"Heeheehee...!" Twilight giggled, curling a wrist up to her chin.

"It's just that... erm... not to knock it or anything... cuz that would be a crime... and... uhm... but... er..."

"Rarity outdid herself," Twilight said firmly.

"Yeah." Sunset wheezed with relief, slumping. Her eyes glued themselves to the glitter. "She kinda did."

"No way around saying it." Twilight fidgeted slightly in the cocktail dress. "I only have myself to blame, I suppose."

Sunset raised an eyebrow. "What the heck for?"

"Well, when I first showed up at her place, I... erm..." Twilight squirmed some more, avoiding Sunset's gaze. "...I-I asked that she make me look nice... b-because I wanted to look 'nice.'"

"Oh..." Sunset pulled the edges of her hoodie down and slumped even further in her seat. "...yeah."

"And—well—you know Rarity." Twilight gulped. "I should have told her to stop at least three ensembles back. I guess part of me was hoping that Applejack would... but that didn't happen." She looked up with glossy eyes. "I hope you don't mind—"

"Not-at-all!" Sunset shot back up, sitting straight. "Er... what I mean is..." She gulped and waved a hand. "You look absolutely gorgeous." Another breath. "Gorgeous-er."

"Hmmmm..." Twilight toyed with a loose strand of violet hair. "Th-thanks."

Sunset smirked. "Now who's Whinnyian Flankspeare?"

"Heeheehee..." Twilight pointed at Sunset's top. "I dig the swell hoodie."

"Pffft..." Sunset looked at herself. "No you don't."

"I do! It's very... you..." Twilight's pupils immediately shrank. "And b-by that I don't mean that you're simple or anything! I mean, sure, you're simply wonderful... but I wouldn't say the word 'handsome', because that's a word you use for guys... but if it wasn't a word to use for guys, I'd totally use it for you and... and-and-and-and..."

Sunset stared at her.

"Mmmm..." It was Twilight's turn to sink in her seat slightly. "...I-I'm really overdressed and I'm sorrrrrrrry."

"No! Don't be sorry! It's... uh... uhhhh..." Sunset swiftly reached over and held up the partially-folded velvet coat. "I especially loved this... thing that Rarity chose!"

Just like that, Twilight shifted back up. "You did?"

"Yeah!" Sunset exhaled, smiling suavely. "I'll have you know I especially love winter wear."

"You do?"

"Yup!"

"... ... ...since when?"

"Since... well..." Sunset rubbed her hand pleasantly across the furry trim and neatly folded the coat back down over the booth's edge. "...since coming here, I guess."

"Do ponies not... uh... wear clothes back in Equestria?"

"Oh we do..." Sunset Shimmer shrugged. "On occasion."

Twilight blinked. "'On occasion?'"

"Uh huh." Sunset looked across the table at her. "For parties. Formal events. Dances... that sort of thing. And, of course..." She gestured out the window. "...for when the weather gets chilly."

"Right."

"But in Equestria, pegasi control the weather. So... at least in the magically civilized parts of the continent... we can plan exactly when and where to put on bundled clothes." Her mouth lingered open after saying that, and there was a noticeable flicker of something in her eyes. Like melancholy or regret. In an attempt to hide it from Twilight, Sunset took a sip of Dr. Pepper, swallowed, and gestured. "That's different in this place, though. People don't control the weather here."

"Heehee. Well..." Twilight rolled her eyes. "We actually do, albeit slowly and disastrously downhill—"

"Oh. Right. That." Sunset snapped a finger. "But what I mean is, you can predict the weather but you can't make an inclement blizzard happen or not happen. So... from what I gather... humans have no choice but to bundle up. And in that chaos, they've... created some really really cute fashion statements, considering the circumstances." She smiled. "But it's more than that, I guess. Humans... bipeds have a fashion that's waaaaaay different from ponies. And they also have this stickler for covering their entire bodies to avoid the nude. It just... it just makes for a different canvas of expression than what I'm used to. It's far more complex and fascinating and... I guess I can't help but love it."

"Heehee..." Twilight folded her hands together. "I'm surprised you haven't talked to Rarity about this before."

"Are you kidding?!" Sunset Shimmer cackled. "I'd never hear the end of it!"

"Heehee!"

"Heh—and worst of all, she'd end it with an excuse to dress me up!" She pointed under the table. "Then she'd put me in some goddess-awful painful heels!"

"Ugh! I know, right?"

"Why didn't you ask her for some flats instead?!"

"I didn't w-want to ruin this evening—"

"Pfft! How?!" Sunset Shimmer snicked, eyebrow raised. "I don't care what you wear on your feet so long as you're comfortable!"

"Well, I'm glad to hear that. Still, though..." Twilight hunched over a bit to take another sip of her soda, all the while avoiding Sunset's direct gaze. "They do... sorta make me feel taller... so I-I can see your face more clearly."

Sunset Shimmer blinked. The front of her hoodie fluctuated slightly in cadence with two or three pronounced heartbeats.

"N-not that it matters..." Twilight sighed defeatedly. "...my stupid knees are always standing inwards."

Sunset giggled warmly at that, a relief for her lungs and other organs. "I love the way you stand when you're acting all pensive, Twilight."

"You d-do...?"

"Yeah." Sunset nodded. "It makes me want to hug you all the..." Her lips trailed. "...harder."

"... ... ..." Twilight stared at her.

"... ... ..." Sunset stared back.

In one swift motion, both girls retreated to their Dr. Peppers, slurping away as they stared at random locations away from one another.