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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I fucking knew it.
She's not a Twilight Sparkle, she's the Twilight Sparkle. She's spent all these centuries gradually replacing her body with cybernetics, to adapt, survive and blend in, growing more and more cynical until she's finally almost as much machine as any regular pony. That bit when she wakes up all but confirms it, tell me I'm wrong!
(The only gap in the theory, of course, is that she doesn't exist in the real world, so how?)