Flash: Redemption

by FlutterTank

Prologue

Prologue

It was a warm spring day. Flowers of all shapes and colors danced in the pleasant breeze. A lone butterfly was blown from its perch on a delicate pink rose, flapping its wings and being carried along by the air. The creature had a lovely sort of grace about it. It flapped its wings spasmically and traveled, with each downstroke, in a sudden new direction. Though its movements were clumsy and uncoordinated, the butterfly still was able to keep about it a graceful, delicate aura.

Suddenly, over the far horizon from which the gentle breeze was coming, there also came a large, dark, ominous wall. It was smoke, as thick and dark as night, rising high into the atmosphere like a storm cloud. It moved quickly and fluidly across the landscape, engulfing all in its path. The sun was quickly stifled by the smoke, leaving the land dark and grey. The butterfly, however, remained its vibrant hues of rose-pink and light yellow.

Then came the wind. Harsh and unforgiving, it bent the flowers, bushes, and trees alike. Its strength sent massive waves through the green, grassy field. Continuing to strengthen, it began to rip plants, by the roots, from the ground. The butterfly began to struggle against the force of the gale, dodging the flying trees and animals being flung by the brutal wind, desperately trying to stay alive. Soon the entire landscape was nothing but dusty, grey dirt, swirling up in small tornados and being thrown by the winds. The smoke rose into the sky, much like a tidal wave about to break.

And break it did. The wave of sinister darkness smashed into the dusty ground, causing a massive wall of air to rip up the very earth itself. The dust was carried away into the distance and only dark, grey slabs of bedrock remained, riddled with cracks and fissures that led to a vast, glowing sea of red down below. The butterfly was being thrown around like a ragdoll, whipping back and forth, somersaulting uncontrollably in the violent wind. The smoke came upon it quickly and engulfed it, shrouding it, making it near invisible. Its color began to fade as the life was slowly was choked from it. Its soul, a pink-and-yellow banded wisp, dissipated into the black, smothering death cloud as it rose from the dead, grey corpse on the ground.

Then, from nowhere, came a quick rhythmic series of deep booms, shaking the ground as if the entire world was in a massive, beating drum.

DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM!

The wind had died and all was peaceful; dead, but peaceful. The grey butterfly, however, began to quiver on the ground.

DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM!

The bass notes rang again, and the butterfly's legs began to move.

DOOM DOOM DOOM!

The butterfly began to grow, its wings expanding and turning from grey to black. They became thick and leather, taking on the appearance of bat wings.

DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM DOOM!

Its face enlarged, becoming ugly and contorted. Its eyes bulged from its head and its proboscis became a sharp, deadly beak.

DOOM DOOM DOOM!

It rose up on its long, spindly, hairy legs and began to beat its wings. The wretched beast began to hover, a horrifying ghost of its former, beautiful self. A thick liquid dripped from its mouth, legs, wings, rear, hitting the scraggly rock below it and staining it deep red. It was monstrous and evil. It reeked of death and decay and as it rose, it turned towards the viewer, who had been watching this apocalyptic scene, passively. It lunged, letting out an ear-piercing shriek, beak opened, spewing blood, aiming to kill.

And the drum hammered on...

Comments

[Artimae]

Interesting opening, definitely has me hooked. I noted some excessive commas though, especially in the first paragraph. Otherwise keep it up!

[FlutterTank]

54665 Yeah, I tend to do that a lot on account of my 6th grade English teacher, who hammered in our heads to use commas all the time to avoid run-ons. He was actually a Social Studies teacher and all teachers had to do English (budget issues), so yea...

[Artimae]

55458 No biggie, commas just break up the pace of the narrative, especially some close to each other. I can understand habits being drilled into you though Don't worry about it and always re-read your work. And if you want a proofreader, let me know .

[Super]

This is one of those " WHAT IN THE HELL?" moments for me. I am definantly interested now, though.