• Member Since 7th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Apr 1st, 2013

Epic_hooves


Newby clopfic writer, looking for people to illustrate his stories.

Comments ( 22 )

"Now they're having buttsex
Cowboy buttsex
Sodomyyyyyyy"


Sorry, couldn't resist that Family Guy reference:rainbowlaugh:

FYI for anyone, I'm not gay, so if the sex isn't the best, then I apologize.
It's not gay if it's with Braeburn.

Damn....this is really good, no need to apologize about anything.:twilightsmile:

Alright mate, even if you aren't gay, you should probably know how the sex works if you want to write about it. Research and all that is the spice of life. :twilightblush:
Cum is not equal to lube, for one. If anything you could get a nasty infection from that. Two, thrusting that hard (not to mention releasing) will give you a one-way ticket to a torn rectum, which is just about the most unsexy thing ever. Three, blowjobs don't work that quickly. It can take as long as a half-hour in order to gain a reaction from the affected party.

A major rule in story-writing is that you should never specify that you're changing the perspective. You CAN do it on a chapter-by-chapter basis, but you can't tell your audience outright without losing your professionalism. Try not to rush your prose. Remember that story-telling is not akin to a race, and that the audience is more than patient to wait for their sex if you manage to develop well-rounded characters.

s18.postimage.org/qo9ijssd3/heyguys.gif
"He's kind-hearted, smart, funny and... there's something special about him you can't quite put your finger on."
Wait, ponies have fingers?

HI!
I'M YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS!
OR YOU CAN JUST CALL ME THE PIE FAIRY!
I'M HERE TO TELL YOU THAT THIS IS THE STRANGEST LITERAL PIECE OF WORK I'VE NEVER READ!
THANKS, AND ARRIVEDERCI!
-THE PIE FUCKING FAIRY

@GingerNutGin thanks for the comment, and I had no clue on those things, even in heterosexual sex I'd never really go for buttsex, so it was new for me to write. As for the infection, let's just say they both washed themselves up in the river, and cleared most of it out (Seems like it'd work, and if not, he's a magical pony with magic sperm that heals, so FUCKALL)
For the blowjob thing... I'm not entirely sure what you're saying, can you clarify?
And the perspective note, I derped and that was left over from the rough draft, I posted this around 1 in the morning and really didn't have time to double check it.

@Sunderbraze
It's the human that has fingers brah...

@Digit COOL, WHY DON'T YOU TRY READING MOMMA FLUTTERSHY? (*Shudder* I hate the author of that fic, and everything about that fic...)

I'm probably going to add a few more chapters to it, even though I originally planned it to be a one-shot thing since I couldn't get Braeburn off my mind, and I did it a bit half-assedly, so that's why the sex might seem rushed.

i enjoyed this. personally im not gay. this was good reading to me. good job, keep on keeping on :moustache:

Two things I noticed that sort of bothered me. The first was the fact that in the beginning, you didn't start a new paragraph every time someone new spoke. At the end, you seemed to have a grasp on it, but earlier, you have them both talking in the same paragraph, and that's something that should be avoided. The second was the random perspective change for three paragraphs. Generally, you should try to keep the perspective the same throughout a story. If you really need to change perspectives during the story, I'd recommend doing so between chapters. Of course, that wouldn't be necessary for something short like this, but I'd argue that this perspective change isn't necessary at all. Maybe you could have accomplished the same effect by showing how Braeburn's body language changed after the incident. If you really must keep the perspective change, I think you should drop the announcement of it. As Gin said, it's a tad unprofessional.

Not really an expert on clop, so I can't really say much more than I agree with what Gin said on that subject. I find it hard to believe that your character would have been able to take a horse cock in his ass without more pain than pleasure, and probably a bit of blood.

Ok, I've got a bit of time tonight, so I'm going to go through and re-do quite a few things
@EricaC78 Yeah, like I said, the perspective change note was left over from the rough draft, and I put it in since I was thinking about expanding that part, and wanted to go back to it, but decided not to. As for the taking a horse cock... *Shrug* I'll just blame it on magic. Nah, but I'll probably change that, I tried putting a tiny bit of that in, but forgot.
@Twilightclopple Thanks!
@Thecrazyasian I'm not a really big fan of it...
OH, and I might add an alternate F/M version of it, simply because I can.

Alright, fixed it! (I hope)

944961
Nooooooo! Braeburn is best gay pony!

944961 Can you keep the M/M version, cause everyone is gay for Braeburn.

@Salvanas, TheCrazyAsian
Heh, don't worry, it'll just be an alternate chapter, the M/M version will still be there

@Mr.Shy92
No. I hate that movie.

938218

You win a gold star for getting the reference!

What's up with all the thumbs downs? Is it simply because you don't like M/M, or is there something wrong with it? I always read comments, so I'd be glad to here what you guys think should be fixed.

mmmm i wish there were more human x braeburn fics

Its like that one movie :trixieshiftleft:

...but if one of them fucked the horse instead. :trixieshiftright:

Either way its a good read, here's a :moustache: . Stay classy.

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