• Published 17th Feb 2018
  • 474 Views, 4 Comments

An overly non-simplistic guide to Equestria species. - Steelwing the Griffon



Have you ever thought 'Do Flurgles actually taste like Blueberries?' If so then this book isn't for you, however if you wish to learn about the species that inhabit Equestria and its surrounding lands then you came to the right place!

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Pony Compendium - Earth

The first creature on our list should be the most common and easy to understand so I might as well go with the ponies, A culture of Equines who are some of the few to progress past simple tool construction in their evolutionary line. The first of the four sub-species of such will be the more hardier of the ponies, the 'Earthen ponies'.

I am happy to state that I am one of such, so take that Scientific University of Canterlot, Earth ponies can do Biology and not just Agricultural science and simple construction! Regardless of my personal conflicts with the S.U.C I do appreciate their work and that outburst was based on previous works of mine being trodden on because my study of magic wasn't of a standpoint of a pony who could use magic themselves...I am getting heavily off track here, back to the subject of the Earth Pony.

Let's start with some simple facts before I go into my little interviews with particular ponies, these you should have been taught in school but as it is unnecessary information and not practised over time, we forget. So this subspecies takes up a whopping Sixty-Four percent of the pony population and has the most adaptive lifestyle that's only rivalled by the Alicorns themselves, for the comparison between ponies however I am not counting Alicorns as they practically have a mix of all others..and having that whole 'Immortality' Shtick. Earth ponies are able to survive in the open for weeks on end in climates like the badlands and northern cloven hoof mountains, however months at a time without proper shelter in these areas will cause permanent damage...we are too used to the lazy lifestyle as opposed to the deadly nature in the pre-Celestial times.

Earth ponies also take up over Ninety percent of the Agricultural businesses over the Equestrian landscape, mostly due to the subtle connection to nature us Ground ponies have, in turn this causes faster rate of growth in plants and even the ability to grow them out of season! But the magical specifics of this I might ramble on about at the end of this book, I am already throwing random pieces here and there...then again this is more of a personal journal of information than..well a book I guess.

Now onto some less known facts and the actual start of my journey! I figured Canterlot may be a good place for pony study but then I remembered the nobles up there have sticks so far up their asses that a whole group of the 'Luna excavation study' couldn't get it out. Do note that the 'Luna Excavation study' is for the ponies who are currently trying to get old age artifacts from before she was banished, NOT for the exploring of her 'Full moon'...Immature children. Next on my list was a small community out...well anywhere actually, much like Ponyville or Dodge City but again that would be Semi-Biased...so I took a journey to Manehattan.

Yes you heard me correctly, Manehattan, and no I am not...well maybe partially out of my mind. The reasoning behind such a decision was because the ponies in that city have a very mixed community, an Earthen Pony could run a weather distributions joint and so on. But as it turned out I wouldn't have even had to take the whole journey, you see I hadn't had to take the train journey to the city simply due to me wanting to extend my trip to gather more information, this made me take a different route. The train goes through mostly forests and mountains if you take the whole 'Canterlot to Manehattan' express line, if you go by wagon however you have to detour AROUND the mountains and into a more Desert climate.

Sometime during this wandering I had come across a small...Tavern? I'm not quite sure as to the actual purpose of it as it was just named 'Ales from Ale' which was confusing at first as I tried to find a place called 'Ale' on my map before figuring it was the actually brewers name! I looked absolutely stupid standing out front looking at an upside-down map for three hours...try it some time, there are some funny shapes! So after my little mapscapade I parked the wagon round the side and entered, it wasn't exactly a 'Busy' place but the ponies there seemed like regulars..there was even this GIANT of a griff who I swear could stand eye to eye with Celestia herself. No I was not drunk already, I met him later on in the trip so we won't worry about his information till we get to it!

At the bar was this...I guess the colour here would be 'Tan' or 'Very light brown' for her coat, I don't see why so many similar colours have to exist with their own names! At least her mane and tail were easy enough to describe as just 'Red' though personally I don't think the one pink streak really suited her. She seemed to be a basic Earth pony, very down to...I refuse to pun, basically I figured at that time that she was a good subject to interview but I guess my social skills were non-existent as I ended up with a broken jaw for three days! Do you KNOW how hard it is to eat the 'Apology Apples' she gave me while the magically induced healing was still in effect!?

Though it does help me jump to another point here, unlike common speculation the Earthen types aren't actually the most durable, that would be the pegasi! They are however the most muscular and enduring, which is what most ponies think the pegasi are, I just don't understand...just look at them. I mean sure the bar pony was small for her species but that doesn't change anything, except for the kick that is. Pegasi are durable as all tartarus considering the amount of times they can crash and not tear their wings off..I'll get to that next chapter though, this is for the Ponies of the ground...I really have to come up with a consistent name.

Earth ponies can run as fast as a pegasi can fly, on average that is. Their muscles are mostly bunched up in the joints and back legs for long runs and powerful kicks, though the downside to that is that there are a lot of arteries and thick blood vessels running through there meaning unless they have years of living on a farm they could do permanent hind leg damage if they constantly kick things. I remember hearing from my mother that one of the townsfolk she lived near to actually KICKED the damn apple trees...like geez mare just pick 'em!

If I am remembering the interview correctly I simply asked her if I could...well...interview her of course. She aptly agreed and after serving the other customers, after introducing myself she returned with a surprisingly heavy farmers accent and stated her name was "Appleale". It definitely explained the name of the...ah she said here she ran the BAR, that's another thing we can tick off the 'Don't know list'.

Anyway Appleale and I had a chat to start of with, something casual and nothing really worth noting here..even with my sense of importance in regards to the information I'm putting into this. After several minutes of idle chatter and a light drink I pulled out my notepad and began asking the lines of questions I had thought out on the long walk, Starting off...Oh well If I can find the transcript I'll put it in here.

Here it is, I left the damn thing in the couch...I slept on it and multiple other documents so I might have to look through it again later.

Ah, well let's start of simple miss..Ale? How were your younger years, I am asking simply to get an aspect on the lifestyle as it could have adverse affects on body growth.

Ale, AppleAle, either or works hun~ ... younger years eh? uhhrm... better for some, worse than others I'd suppose. My parents passed away when I was young, and ah grew up with my aunt and uncle in Appaloosa. We all moved out to Manehattan to start spreading the Apple name and trade further out, and, one thing led to another, and a good mix of farm living and suburban or inner city living gave me a good well...mix?...of down humble Apple raising and pride, with a bit more uhh...knowledge of more modern ponies. But... She got quite the deadpan look on her face at this point ..no, just short, nothing happened that stunted growth aside from some randomness...

Alright so I agree, your lifestyle at that time was quite average so there are no hindering or boosting factors here...growing up did you have any disabilities of sort? Maybe a..well...height problem?

Well, if you wanna put it straight sure, I lived a boring life so far but.. well, it was a tad difficult, being shorter as I was. It made bucking, bartending, average things a task but I learned and adapted as any Apple would, plus being small and cute gets me good tips.

Bucking at a young age? So you must have fairly strong hind legs for the farm, especially considering your size...may I examine them?

M-My hind legs?... most stallions just give a look and try to hide it, you though, you've been nice so I'll give you a headstart before I buck your brains all over my floor... one... two...

Well...I did mean to actually study her legs and I have to admit that yes, I could have worded it in a far better way. Though it's easy to guess what happened next, I got up and managed to trip as she extended her leg with a fair amount of force. She admitted later that it was just meant to hit my forehead and knock me out so she could drag me out of her bar, however I tripped halfway through her kick and she ended up hitting my jaw. I could swear that all the beings in the bar winced as the large cracking noise they heard was NOT in fact me hitting the ground.

visit in hospital, painful apology apples and so on. I don't hold it against her and she became a great friend over my journey as we exchanged letters, it was one of the more pleasant species I met along the way and she injured me the least. That was my experience with the mare to the dot, I left unimportant information out of course...just to keep a lower age rating on this and in no way am I going into sexual pieces and mating rituals!

For now I guess that will be all on the earth pony, of course some other pieces of information may pop in and I'll add extra chapters in after I finish the pony side of things. I mean who wouldn't mind reading about certain aspects of culture and such, there was a wonderful group called the masque.

Honestly I suck at ending things and I wish to ramble more but there is only so much to keep readers interested, I know as much due to the fact that my wife is cutely leaned against me as she sleeps...did you know dragons make adorable purrs during slumber. I do hope that this information is helpful, for now I must say this; No matter how beautiful a mare is, don't ask about her hind legs because you might just find them Jaw-dropping!

Author's Note:

-I have him use 'Everybody' as he has travelled and studied in so many cultures that he has adapted to not use the pony translation of such.

-Ink is a rambler, he goes off on whatever tangents pop into his head and he can't help but jot down everything he believes is useful..even when it really isn't.