How deep does a friendship go?
Does surpass the conventions and taboos of society?
Does it overpower the scorn of others?
For Twilight and Spike, this has always been the case; their deep bond formed under the watchful eye of Princess Celestia during their long years in Canterlot.
But for Rarity, a mare known for her superficial view of the world, this question has always remained open, until a chance encounter reveals a dreadful secret about Spike that could drive both him and Twilight from Ponyville.
Horrified beyond belief, and pushed to the very edge of her relationship with the two, Rarity will see exactly how far her friendship to a scatterbrained librarian and her reptilian assistant will take her.
Chapters (2)
Okay, so is it just me or does anyone else find it horribly ironic that this site has no "Friendship" tag for stories.
Minor complaints aside, it seems like I was able to drag another chapter out of my Unfinished Fics Folder and wrangle it into something quasi-readable.
Just four oneshots, two small stories, and three epic length adventures to go... God I wish I was kidding.
Anyway hope you guys enjoy it.
A darker take on the usually adorable slice-of-life genre.
I'm interested.
I did like it. It's difficult to portray Rarity in something more than a snit but less than a nervous breakdown, and you handled it well. And, well, a dragon does not live by gems alone.
Actually likes how it goes
Just hope it'll be more adventure than Dark
Wow, interesting take on Spike and his "traditional tendencies" due to his species. Faved, I'll be following this story closely
Also, am I sensing a hinting towards TwiSpike, hmmm?
"Hell, even Spike had a crush on her.
That last thought tickled at something in the back of her mind but Twilight ignored it as Rarity went into another drama filled tale."
Or was the tickling because she had forgotten Spike was gonna be back soon? Either way, this is a superbly well written piece of work and I eagerly await more.
'Sqeee'
Very good story, handled very well. To be honest, I'm a little surprised this premise hasn't popped up sooner, but you've certainly done it justice.
I like it, but what I really like is his view on life. He does not kill for sport or fun, but because he needs to and he shows his respect for it. I know this is not a shipping story but I hope Rarity can see past that and understand that and come on they eat eggs that falls under the meat part of life. Even the pets eat meat the owl eats mice and dont tell me Raritys cat dont hunt once and a while. Anyways nice story I just hope this really does not blow Spike out of the water with Rarity besides really Rarity poines are prey he risked his life for you aginst dogs that eat meat if anything dudes like a pony guraden.
Anyways "agian" rants over I like it a lot not really into dark so I hope it does not go to dark but yeah I like it
A very interesting set-up. It's hard to judge just how strongly Rarity would react to something like that. I can easily see her being unsettled around Spike and avoiding him after such a revelation, but openly hostile? I'm not so sure. I hope she's not the villain of the piece. This first night can easily be chalked up to stress and shock.
I suspect Fluttershy would have the least problem with the news, as she's been shown to care for predators and even feed them fish herself. A normal farmer wouldn't be overly alarmed (unless she feared Spike would hunt her livestock) but as AJ doesn't slaughter any animals on the farm, she could go either way. Really, it's the average, panicky Ponyville residents that would/will be the real trouble.
Looking forward to seeing where you take this...
Considering that Fluttershy takes care of animals of all dietary types, Ponyvillians tolerate the presence of sapient carnivores like griffons and minotaurs, and all the courageous things she's done, I don't see Rarity reacting that badly. I can understand being disgusted by blood, but dismissing Spike as a monster that can't be trusted is way OoC for her. Hell, she forgave Spike almost instantly after his rampage, something far more disturbing than some blood.
Loving this story.
Puttin' this on watch 'cause it's brilliant.
I'm liking the concept here, it's quite interesting. I'm with those who think Rarity was a bit over the top (even for her) but nothing deal breaking for me.
The greed growth was one thing after all (no-one knew that would happen and it wore of almost instantly). Learning that the little dragon that she'd gone gem hunting with is hunting and eating other animals? Yeah, I can see her getting upset. Especially after the shock of him coming in covered in blood.
In short, it looks like I'll be adding another Spike-centric story to my favorites list.
Keep it up! This was a very intriguing story!
I have to admit it seemed... right, Celestia teaching Spike the way to be a humane carnivore.
Very well done. Do please continue this story!
This is how you nom
nom, nom, nom... 
SPOILER ALERT!!!
which would be any minute now if that hour hand was correct, he’d be covered in dirt and blood.
-This... doesn't ring true to me. Spike isn't especially stealthy, and can't fly. Ponies may avoid the night, but not entirely. He would wash up in stream I would think. As long as I am commenting, I wonder if Rarity will be stitching him up, and if so if Twilight will have to provide a diamond-tipped needle (don't think that would work IRL, but it fits the setting). Perhaps an enchanted needle? Then again ordinary needles can get in far enough for her to use him as a pin-cushion.
Most ponies weren’t as accepting of Spike’s diet as she was,
-Well, that implies that despite the cover story some random pony who is out at night for some reason discovering Spike wouldn't be total disaster. I wonder if they can tell blood from some other dark liquid by sight, or recognize it by smell?
She led the hyperventilating mare back to her seat and tried her best to calm her down.
-Let me guess, she will be relieved, at least at first, to discover it wasn't HIS blood (well... mostly).
'It is far better to tell the truth, no matter how uncomfortable it may be, and stick to your convictions, than to weave a web of lies and lose yourself in the process.'
-Yeah, I had wondered about the EXISTENCE of a "cover story" given the importance of Honesty, but I guess if Celestia gave the right order the cover story could be the technical truth.
Celestia had never tolerated lying under any circumstances.
-Ah, so she DID give Spike a Royal Order to hunt making "Royal Business" just as much of a truth as "...but you simply must stop reading those dusty old books. My dear Twilight, there is more to a young pony's life than studying, so I'm sending you to supervise preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration, in this year's location, Ponyville...".
Shouldn’t we take him to the hospital!
-Called it. Note that this does NOT make your story boring. Good plots ARE usually predictable in certain ways.
but now his chances with her had been completely and utterly destroyed.
-I would hardly call this a certainty...
‘You must always wash yourself as quickly as possible after completing a hunt.
-I GUESS that if the library was closer than a stream or pool and he was taking things too literally this could explain matters. I also, I would reverse the order of the pronouns regarding the prey and himself.
see the extent of any injuries you may have acquired and prevent infection from setting in..
-Three periods, not two.
What the Princess put him through?! He has more self control than any pony I know!
-I see she trained him hard... makes sense given how little is known of dragons in Equestria.
He turned into a rampaging monster because of his self control!
-A valid point, although that was against a much more unfamiliar temptation, and may have had a pretty nasty feedback loop of mental impairment reducing his judgement.
“No she doesn’t. She’s your friend; she just needs time to… adjust.”
-Matches my earlier guess, although I would have changed it after reading what Rarity was shouting if I had thought of it. I would have then changed it back upon reading this line.
She had always found those first aid exercises useless back then; just meaningless distractions from her lessons about magic.
-She seems to have broadened her studies long before she came to Ponyville, but I guess it makes sense that she might not have at that point.
hydra,
-The casualness with which Fluttershy headed off to Froggy-Bottom Bog, and even the fact that it had an individual name, implies to me that it isn't part of Everfree (although obviously it turned out to be dangerous despite that).
rusty medical knowledge.
-Well, this demonstrates just how much our fanon's vary. In the next chapter of a story I am working on, I went with her success at marathon running in "Fall Weather Friends" as well as ability to research Cutie-Pox and have her looking up how to put in an IV(in a non-emergency situation, and with Fluttershy insisting on watching to double-check her) and successfully putting it in herself with the aid of a mirror... since I went with the real-world practice of putting IVs into a horse's carotid artery.
using some strange method predators used to determine ownership.
-Peeing on the trees like a wolf, or clawing them like a cougar?
She was fuzzy on the details, and Spike always seemed to hastily change the subject when she asked,
-Ah... pee then.
his claim to ownership of that thin strip of forest was enough to deter the nastiest of the creatures that lived inside the dark wood.
-I can see most of them being wary of a dragon by instinct, and stupid enough not to be able to figure out the difference between a hatchling and a full-grown one, but we know of ONE creature in the forest that would probably specifically seek him out to kill him, and is probably smart enough to do so... the green dragon from "Owl's Well that Ends Well".... Perhaps there are some other territories intervening between the two, so the green never makes it out that far?
that prompted a thin trail of smoke to rise from his nose.
-I take it that either she fireproofed the basket and blanky long ago, or he only smokes in his sleep, and never flames?
so she tried a trick she had learned when he still small enough to sleep curled up in her lap.
-Sleeping spell? Probably not, probably something much more mundane, such as a lullaby, or rocking him telekinetically. Wow... I just called telekinesis "mundane", shows how weird the ponyverse is...
followed by the remnants of his low purrs.
-He purrs? Nice touch... subtly keeping the reader reminded his feral side and how much she accepts it.
Twilight paused before slipping into her bed and looked out onto the moonlight streets of Ponyville.
-moonlit
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Wow, thanks for that really nice critique. The whole point (for me anyway) of writing this is to improve upon my rather meager literary abilities, and being able to read an incredibly thorough and honest appraisal of my writing is very helpful, though sometimes a little embarrassing.
Now onto your actual comments:
First off, regarding Spike's stealth; his ability in this area as opposed to Canon!Spike is very much the divergence between the two of them. This Spike needs to supplement his diet with a steady supply of meat, and in order to obtain that he needs to hunt. Trial and error, as well as grueling lessons from Princess Celestia, have turned him into a fairly experienced, "humane" predator. This means that he is skilled enough to track prey without being noticed, and all together more aware of his surrounding than Canon!Spike. Oh, and to respond to another of your comments, this is totally the reason he has no problem getting back to the library without being seen; not because of a blatant plothole, not at all...
Moving on... to Twilight's medical knowledge.
One of my pet peeves for stories in this fandom is the tendency to make Twilight knowledgeable in practically every subject, and able to use that knowledge without any problems what so ever. She's smart and bookish sure, but her Special Talent is magic and magic alone. The Twilight that I write, doesn't know everything, and is bad at quite a lot of things (though really, really good at magic). Just thought I'd give you my perspective.
Lastly, I thought I'd clear up some confusion you seemed to have with the "trick" Twilight uses to calm Spike as he's sleeping. The whole thing is just her scratching behind his earfins, no magic involved (though those things you mentioned did sound interesting). I'm a cat person, and I used some personal experience with my feline companions as the basis for Spike's reactions in that scene. I hope I didn't make it too hard to understand.
Thanks again for the nice review, and I'm glad you liked it even with all the rough edges.
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Glad to be of service:
One point of clarification:
I certainly don't support the idea that Twilight knows everything about everything. If she did she wouldn't always be looking things up.
My concept was that given the right reference materials it is a plausible fanon but not required by logic that she could be up to speed very very quickly.
I loved that Spike was hunting in his sleep. Good job on making Spike seem pitiful and terrifying at the same time.
The best solution is for them talk to each other, but that might end the story too quickly. I wonder how long Rarity can keep her promise.
I wouldn't be surprised if Fluttershy already knew Spike's diet even if Twilight did not tell her.
Good job so far, I was actually thinking about this story today.
“Ah’ve just come to return your- Damn girl, yah look straight awful..." ... Damn girl... From Applejack's mouth?
Oh and constructing comment, good story. I been expecting a Fluttershy scene and cant wait for it! I am bit surprised her animal friends haven't told Fluttershy about Spike roaming the forest or have they!?!?
I have only one thing to say to rarity
And Opalescence ?
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I'm gonna guess the difference between Spike and Opalescence is that the cat isn't gonna grow to be bigger than a house.
I am enjoying the story here, the pacing is well done. Plus, like I said last chapter, it's not hard to understand why Rarity would lash out like she did.
However, I do have to agree to Lethanvas slightly. I can see how the idea of a country of herbivores warning one another away from predators would form, it makes a lot of sense. Except in Equestria we have seen there are predatory animals (Fluttershy's bear friend for example). Even if we put aside the feral predators since ponies like Fluttershy are able to reason with them, there's the griffons. Claws, beak, etc...They're pretty much all predator and nopony in the show ever seemed to treat Gustav any different.
Still, since that is just one griffon I'm willing to assume that's already taken into account somehow. I'm gonna keep holding on and enjoy this story, so keep on writing!
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She must have looked bad!
I hope you continue this soon. This really is one of my favorite fics.
something tells me rarity is going to tell somepony and Twilight is going to beat the s!@# out of her.
but great story hope ya continue it. 
I'm just glad Rarity didn't take her sister's word for it.
Why?
She'd probably blame it on Spike, at this point.
Really loving this. Keep it up.
You wound me by writing this much of a gem, letting me find it, and then letting me discover that it hasn't been updated in almost a year.
In all seriousness, though, it's only two chapters in and I'm really hoping that you find the time to continue it. This story deals with the struggle between the nature of dragons versus ponies and the bonds of friendship between Spike and the cast. I love stories like this, and you're right about there not being enough straight friendship stories in this fandom. There really should be a friendship tag.
Please work on this story again if you can find the time. I'm really looking forward to it.
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To be honest what did the main 6 expect Spike to do eat gems his whole life he's a meat eater as long as its just animals I would be fine with it
i can forsee Spike 'mashing' Rarity to a pulp with the help of a certain little sister
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Ahem, you yourself are a predator.
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Yeah, and that's why i understand Spike's problem so much.
Luckily my own friends and family except my meat eating, as long as i only kill for food and it's only animals
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Ya know, I wish I was rich so that I could revive dead writers by throwing money at them
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You and me both.