Two Sides of the Same Tree

by TheRust

Cain: My Despair

My existence.

I grow tired of living here in this shithole of a planet. Life’s own meaning is that of nothing but misery and hatred, and yet everyone still desires to live. Yet why else does everyone waste time finding meaning in living? Every day and night, whenever I hear the joys of others; I just want to drill my ears out of my fucking skull. Hearing the laughter and joys of those who think their happiness means anything makes me sick to the depths of my own stomach. I have no value in this world and neither does anyone else have a reason to live. Why else would we be here suffering, when the answer should be so obvious? I know what it means to suffer. I hear the voices cry out to me in anguish, begging me to save them for their everlasting torment. I don’t want to save them. I want to hear them suffer. Hearing their pains bring me a sense of ecstasy I have never felt before. The suffering that everyone will face in the end is what true joy is, for that is what is our ending will always entail. Nothing but tears and the fact that our own life brings misery to those we meet. Why should anyone waste their time bringing joy is beyond me? I want to see everyone suffer. Everyone must die, for it is what only brings us true happiness in the end. They all must die, and I will…

“H…Hello..?” whimpers out a feminine voice behind me. Like always, nothing really amazes me at this point. Still remaining in my chair, I slowly turn my own head to get a look at what could be calling me and when my eyes finally come in contact at what I heard, I swear that whatever it was only exists to mock me from the sheer look of it.

This small, furry, purple looking cretin with with the devil’s horn and wings looks at me as it carried a brown leather bag on its side, with the most puzzling look.

It stays quiet for a few seconds; I slowly begin to feel anger flow through my nerves, like if I was something people needed to be afraid of at first sight.

“Does this fucker have any manners? Why can’t it just say something already?!”

Not wanting to drag this on a minute longer, I slowly pop myself out of my chair and make my way to this thing, still within distance so I don’t get too close to it. I then give it the most cheerful introduction possible to get it open its mouth.

“Hey there! You got me startled for a second, there.” I said cheeringly, pretending not to care about the surreal nature of this… thing.

Just then, like if I said the magic words, its eyes widen and it finally begins to open its mouth.

“Oh my! I am so sorry about that!” It loudly blurted out; I swear my own ears were just ready to pop out from hearing it shriek that was reminiscent of a dying banshee.

“Too loud!” I responded with both my hands protecting my ears, feeling even more aggravation build up, but I needed to keep it under control right away for the moment.

Just then, it started speaking again.

“I am so sorry again! ThisisthefirsttimeImeetanewspeciesand! and...and”

Sloooow… Down. Take a breather already.” I interrupted as politely as possible, despite how much I was just about ready to make it endure a fresh batch of hell. How anyone could tolerate something this grating is beyond my comprehension. Maybe this is what it means to suffer true despair.

This purple cretin takes close its eyelids, looks down on the floor for a moment, and slowly takes a deep breath. Once again, it makes contact to my face.

And unfortunately, once again, it begins to speak.

“I mean.. Just… Wow! I never got a chance to meet a homo sapient creature like this, this is so much better than having a bunch of books fall out of the sky!” it rambled on, like a child telling me some forgettable story worth the time of no one with the slightest bit of sense.

I mentally chuckled at the optimism of its curiosity. For such a hideously cutesy creature, it definitely showed it with its response. It’s like taking a bag of sugar and giving it to a baby to eat for dinner. Not cute and not endearing to anyone but its irresponsible mother.

I remained silent and locked eye contact with this imbecile. I definitely was about ready to slice it apart and eat it apart for dinner. Or perhaps the nature of this being would kill me. An enticing thought.

“Maybe that’s what my destiny is, I should get about and finish it..”

“Oh, I almost forgot! It’s nice to meet you. I am Twilight Sparkle. Would you like to introduce yourself?” Interrupted the yet again cretin, its lack of respect towards me was painfully obvious.

Nonetheless, I decided to keep playing along

“The pleasure is all mine, my name is Cain. And I take it you are some kind of dog or something, something?” I asked, as a retort towards the rudeness this wretched being has the nerve to show.

“Oh no, not that at all Mr. Cain.” It chuckled out like what I said was some kind of joke. It’s almost like it begs me to rob it of its life.

“I am actually an Alicorn from Equestria, a peaceful land full of wonderful and kind ponies who only wish to help another out when needed.” It responded like the overly cheery tour guide it was to me.

“Interesting.” I apathetically responded. I notice the creature’s expression slowly went from being overly cheery to that of awkwardness, and I couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight of it. Before I could say anything, it interrupted me… Yet again.

“Yes it is quite an interesting bit of trivia about our land, and I would like to present you with the honor of visiting our kingdom so we can celebrate our successful discovery of a new species and hopefully have a chance to understand you.” It said, as it begins walking around my apartment, looking at the few, essential belongings I had as if I were some kind of freak.

Despite how much this shithead was pissing me off with its attitude, I focused back on the topic at hand.

“Understand us?” I asked, wondering about the naive intent this thing has in mind.

“Yes. It wouldn’t take too much of your time. Just run some harmless tests, talk a little, maybe even have a little tea. Oh wait! Does your kind even like tea? I cannot say we found anything about your species liking tea in the little we know about you.” It question, with its goat like foot rubbing against its chin.

“I think a glass of warm water would be fine. I guess.” I lazily responded, not even giving a shit at this point.

“Wonderful! We have plenty of warm water.” It chirped as a glowing aura slowly formed its way around its horn, which I noticed was affecting the brown leather bag the cretin carried as it opened up. I then see a levitated notepad and a pencil levitating towards the face of this thing, and it quickly begins to scribble notes down.

“Juuust wanted to get this little bit of information down about humans like warm water. I always love to know more about everything, you know?!” It smiled as it finalized the last word it must have written down and returned both pencil and notebook back on the bag.

“Yeah, must be such a great honor to take me there” I dryly responded

“I offer my sincerest gratitude for taking the time to even allow us with the opportunity to have an audience with you. Your generosity makes me happy to say the least.” The purple cretin stated, not aware of the obvious sarcasm.

“Yeah, I am happy too. But anyway, how do you even plan on taking me there.” I questioned, as the cretin was eyeing on each wall of my apartment.

“With this little bit of a magic, we will get there in no time, portal style. And I do just want to add that I am certain you will enjoy your time with us, or else I will do what I can to give you the best experience possible.” It claimed as its horn begins to omit a pink aura around it. It tilts its head to the only empty wall inside the apartment and blast a pinkish ray. The rays around the wall slowly make shape into an oval looking reflection, with some streaks of faint rainbow colors running along the center of this reflective surface.

“And how would you know what I want and whether or not you can do something like that? Are you like some kind of psychic, some type of goddess maybe?” I asked, still looking at this portal like entrance to another world.

“I wouldn’t dare say I am goddess, but I am a pretty powerful now that I think about it.” It smirked, like a fat kid who discovered he had a piece of candy in its pocket

“All powerful you say?” I asked, finding cretin only slightly more interesting than before.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to sound all high and mighty but it’s probably just nerves speaking. I just can’t wait to see how this will go down in Equestrian history as one the biggest discoveries ever to be found.”

“I see…” I nodded in acceptance of the situation at hand.

“Well, if you like. We can traverse through trough this portal right here and be on our way.” The cretin chirped to me, looking at my face once more with a smile before it started trotting to the portal. I follow through in the end, with a sinister grin on my face with one last thought in my mind.

“Patience is a virtue among us all; despite how meaningless it is in the end. Perhaps I can take this I have time to show their kind how much of an enjoyable person I am in the end. Maybe then, I can finally spread my wonderful message, even if I am not worthy of having an audience with my own kind.

I am such a waste of life. Maybe they will see we humans are not so different.”