Muffins

by BubblePuff

Sonic-Derp-Boom

Doctor Whooves sat with Derpy on the floor. The two of them were playing while waiting for Dinky to get home from school. They rolled a red ball with a yellow star between them.

“Derpy, can you say ball?” Doctor Whooves asked.

Derpy examined the ball, then looked at Doctor Whooves with a smile. “Ba-Ba!”

Doctor Whooves could not help but snicker. “Close enough. Though I must say, since being regressed into a foal you’ve become more vocal than you usually are.”

The door opened and Dinky arrived home. “Mom! Dad! I’m home!”

Derpy crawled over to Dinky and hugged her leg. “Dwinky!”

Dinky smiled and patted Derpy on the head as Doctor Whooves came over and nuzzled her. “Hello Dinky, how was your day?”

Dinky bit her lower lip. “Well, I failed my history test.”

Doctor Whoove’s eyes went wide with shock. “What?! How?”

“Miss Cheerilee didn’t believe me when I wrote down that the Windigos were actually an alien race that were trying to terraform the planet and used negative emotions as fuel.”

“But you were there. I brought you with me last Hearths Warming.”

“She didn’t believe me. Miss Cheerilee said I didn’t take the assignment seriously and treated the whole thing like a big joke.”

“Well then, you and I are going to have a parent - teacher with Miss Cheerilee tonight. We’ll show her that you were correct on that test!”

Dinky looked down at her mother. “But what about mom? If we’re going to do what I think you’re planning to do, then she should stay home. It wouldn’t be safe for foals.”

Doctor Whooves tapped his chin. “Oh yes. Quite right, quite right.” He thought for a moment, then his face lit up. “She’ll stay here with a foal sitter! And I know just the two mares who are perfect for the job!”

A couple of hours later there was a knock at the front door. Dinky opened it to find Starlight and Trixie.

“The great and powerful Trixie and her assistant Starlight are here to foal sit!” Trixie announced. Starlight let out a sigh and flattened her ears, giving Trixie a clear look of irritation.

“For the last time, I am NOT your assistant!”

“Fine, co-star or whatever” Trixie said as she rolled her eyes and waved her hoof.

Dinky escorted them inside. She led Trixie and Starlight to the living room where Derpy was in her playpen shaking a rattle. She looked up at the two mares and made a big smile.

“Stawight! Twixie!”

Starlight trotted over and rubbed her cheeks. “Hello Derpy! You get cuter every time I see you!”

Doctor Whooves emerged from his workshop. “Ah, Trixie and Starlight! I am so glad that you two could foal sit tonight.”

“Anything we can do to help Doctor!” Trixie replied.

“Dinky and I should be back later tonight. Make sure that Derpy eats her dinner and gets a bath. Oh, and her pegasus magic is starting to kick in so she might have bursts of flight.”

“Doctor, we know how to handle a foal.” Starlight said reassuringly.

“Just be warned. Derpy was quite the champion flyer when she was a filly.” Doctor Whooves then felt a tugging on his tail. He looked down to see Dinky.

“Come on Dad, we’re going to be late!”

Doctor Whooves bent down and kissed Derpy on the cheek. “Have a good time!” He and Dinky then headed for the workshop.

“Doctor, shouldn’t you and Dinky be leaving through the front door?” Trixie asked with a puzzled look on her face.

Doctor Whooves and Dinky simply smiled. “We have a much quicker way to reach Miss Cheerilee’s house. Alonsee!” Dinky and and Doctor Whooves entered the workshop and shut the door behind them. Starlight and Trixie then heard a weird noise that sounded like WURR, WURR, WURR.

The simply shook it off and focused their attention on Derpy. “What would you like to do first Derpy?” Starlight asked after she got down to the foal’s level.

Derpy waved her tiny hooves in the air. “Pway!”

Starlight giggled. “Alright, how about a tea party?”

“Te pawty! Yay!” Derpy shouted. Starlight used her magic to bring out the tea party set and set it up. Derpy crawled up to the table and was about to grab a tea cup when Trixie stopped her.

“Wait! A tea party isn’t complete without proper attire. Fortunately, the great and powerful Trixie has the perfect garment for you!” Trixie then dressed up Derpy in miniature versions of her cape and hat.

Starlight looked at Trixie with a raised eyebrow. “And how long have you been working on that?”

“Hey, Rarity isn’t the only pony with fashion sense!” Trixie said with a smirk.

Derpy loved the outfit. She immediately began to pour tea for herself and her favorite toy Sweetie. It wasn’t long before a rumble could be heard coming from Derpy’s tummy.

“It sounds like a certain little filly is hungry!” Starlight said as she reached over and tickled Derpy’s belly, making her laugh and squeal. Starlight then picked her up with her magic and placed Derpy in her high chair for dinner.

Trixie went to cupboard and pulled out several jars of foal food. “Lets see, strained carrots, strained peas, strained...brown stuff.”

“Let’s try the peas.” Starlight took the jar and opened it. She scoop out a tiny bit with a rubber spoon and offered it to Derpy. “Okay Derpy, open wide!”

Derpy shook her head. “No! Taste wike yuk!”

“Come on! It’s good for you!” Starlight pleaded.

“No!” Derpy then pressed her lips firmly shut.

Trixie took the spoon from Starlight. “Here, let Trixie show you how Trixie’s mom got her to eat as a foal.” Trixie the placed one hoof over Derpy’s nose. After a few seconds, Derpy opened her mouth to breath. That’s when Trixie shoved the spoon into her mouth.

“You see? Simple as that.” Trixie said proudly. Derpy then spat out the strained peas, which hit Trixie right in the face.

Starlight feel to the floor laughing. Derpy pointed at Trixie and giggled.

After finally getting Derpy to eat a jar of strained peaches, and Trixie washed off her face, the two of them decided to give Derpy her bath. Starlight booped Derpy on the nose as she brought her into the bathroom. “You’re just a little stink bug, aren’t you?” Derpy replied with a giggle.

The tub was filled and Derpy was put in the water. “Bubbas?” She asked.

Starlight looked around the bathroom. “I’m sorry Derpy, but I think you’re all out of bubble bath.”

Derpy became angry and smacked the water with both of her front hooves. “Want bubbas!”

Both Starlight and Trixie dug through the cupboards and medicine cabinet, but couldn’t find any bubble bath. Derpy was on the brink of a full temper tantrum.

Trixie then had an idea. “Derpy, if Trixie gives you a piece of candy, will you calm down?”

Derpy’s face instantly lit up with a big smile. “Candy!”

Trixie grabbed a bag of candy from under her cape. She took out a piece and stuck it in Derpy’s mouth. Derpy suck nommed on it happily.

“Um, Trixie. What kind of candy is that?” Starlight asked.

“Just something Trixie picked up at the market earlier today.” Trixie looked at the lable and read it aloud. “Chocolate covered coffee beans.”

Both Starlight and Trixie’s eyes went wide with shock and terror. They both slowly turned their heads to witness when the flight spurts of a pegasus foal were mixed with caffeine and sugar.

Water sloshed all over the place from the tub as Derpy began shaking like paint mixer. The tiny filly then took off with such force that the bathtub exploded. A blur of yellow and grey raced through the house.

Starlight and Trixie both raced to catch Derpy. Trixie ran and Starlight tried teleporting, but neither of them were fast enough for the little foal. Starlight then noticed the open window.

Both she and Trixie dashed over to try and close it, but they were too late. The yellow and grey blur flew right out the window and straight up into the air. Derpy flew higher and higher, her speed increasing as she ascended. Eventually Derpy broke the sound barrier, and the night sky was lit up with a bright yellow ring. A sonic-”Derp”-boom. Windows as far as The Crystal Empire were shattered. The light could be seen over Yakyakistan. Abysinnia even felt small tremors.

Starlight and Trixie raced outside and looked up in awe at the sonic-Derp-boom. For a moment everything was quiet. That silence was broken by Trixie’s shouting.

“By Celestia! She exploded!”

Starlight tapped Trixie on the shoulder. “No wait, look!” Starlight pointed up in the night sky. A small object could be seen gently gliding down towards the two mares. Derpy glided down in a spiral, a big smile upon her face. When Derpy was close enough to the ground, Starlight caught her. Derpy let out a big yawn then fell asleep. Starlight and Trixie both smiled at sleeping filly. She was just too adorable. It was only after walking back into the house and seeing the destruction everywhere that they realized they had a lot of cleaning and fixing to do.

“I’ll put Derpy in her crib. YOU start cleaning.” Starlight ordered.

“Why must Trixie be the one who cleans first?”

“Because you’re the one who had the bright idea to give candy to a foal.” Starlight said with a stare that rivaled Fluttershy’s.

Trixie gulped. “Trixie shall fetch the broom.”

After cleaning up the mess (And repairing the bathtub) Starlight and Trixie heard the WURR, WURR, WURR sound coming from the workshop again. Doctor Whooves and Dinky emerged a few moments later.

“I’m so glad that we could show Miss Cheerilee that I was telling the truth on my history report.” Dinky said.

Doctor Whooves nodded in agreement. “Yes, it’s just unfortunate that we were attacked by the great intelligence and his killer snowmen.”

“I’ve been meaning to ask, what is a snowMAN? I know what a snowPONY is, but what's with the man part?”

Doctor Whooves shifted his eyes before smiling nervously and patting his daughter on the head. “I’ll tell you later.” The two then approached Starlight and Trixie. “So, how was foal sitting?” Doctor Whooves asked.

Starlight and Trixie both looked to each other, and then towards Doctor Whooves and Dinky. “Everything went...Fine!” Starlight said with strained smile.

“Oh yes, Derpy was an absolute joy to look after! No problems at all!” Trixie said as she laughed nervously.

Doctor Whooves and Dinky checked in on Derpy. She was sound asleep in her crib. Doctor Whooves and Dinky both D’awwed at the sight.

“Well, it looks like the two of you did a wonderful job! Can I count on you to foal sit again should the need arise?” Doctor Whooves asked.

Trixie was about to object when Starlight shoved a hoof in her mouth. “We would be delighted to!”

Starlight and Trixie said goodbye and left. As they walked back to Twilight’s palace, Trixie turned to Starlight. “Why would you agree to foal sit again? Tonight was a nightmare!”

“Because foal sitting Derpy is a quadrillion times easier than watching Flurry Heart for five minutes.” Starlight said said flatly.

Trixie thought for a moment and tapped her chin. “Yeah, you’re right about that.”

Comments

[Bronycommander]

I have to agree with Starlight, foal sitting a pegasus is much easier than a alicorn. And I can't blame Cheerilee, what is proven in actual history and experieced by a time lord are 2 different things. Don't want to imagine how she had to be convienced. But anyway, glad to hear you passed, Dinky!

[Viper Pit]

ow my sides hurt from lauging so hard

[Darksoul85]

Super derpy