• Published 16th Jun 2018
  • 1,243 Views, 20 Comments

Glimpses of Regret - SC_Orion



One single choice can cause so much hurt.

  • ...
2
 20
 1,243

Chapter 2

"Rainbow Dash?"

Rainbow's forehoof and ear twitched in her sleep. She rolled over and pressed her head into the couch cushion, then nuzzled subconsciously. A little smile pulled on her lips as she inhaled Twilight's familiar scent, and the disturbance was forgotten. She gently nuzzled deeper into the couch cushion, seeking the familiar comfort Twilight brought her. Even though Twilight's scent was there, it felt wrong; She knew it wasn't a part of Twilight's body that she was nuzzling, so her nuzzle slowed to a stop.

"Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow groaned softly, and her ear flicked again. She nestled into the couch more despite being vaguely aware it wasn't Twilight, trying to escape the distant disturbance. Her wings shifted as if trying to cover more of her body.

Princess Luna took a deep breath, then silently strode into the living room from the hallway. She walked around in front of the couch, then came to a stop, watching the pegasus sleep. A dozen questions fled through her mind, all of them were questions she hoped the future princess could answer for her. But first, the pegasus needed to wake up. "Rainbow Dash," she said again, her even voice in a conversational tone.

Rainbow jerked in her sleep, and her head shot up. "Huh..? Wuh..?" she mumbled. She winced as her head throbbed as a result of her hangover, though it subsided to the back of her mind. After a few seconds, she blinked her eyes, finally realizing that the dark figure standing before her was a pony that she recognized. She followed the coat upwards and then met Luna's gaze. The alicorn looked at her calmly, yet curiously.

"Rainbow, why did Twilight show up on my balcony crying like a filly who was told that her parents had been killed?"

Rainbow recoiled and froze. The question was asked in an almost absent tone, like how one would ask how another's day was going. Yet the content of the question struck her to her core, ripping up everything it came into touch with. Her eyes took on an empty look as her mind replayed the events from last night. She felt sick, and she could still the phantom pleasure it had brought her, as if it was still happening. It was fresh in her mind. She wasn't sure whether that or the memory of the way Twilight looked as she fled was worse. Both memories sent a shiver down her spine, both condemning her for her mistake. She stayed deathly silent.

"Rainbow Dash?" Luna asked again, her brow creasing in concern.

Rainbow shifted her weight and clenched her jaw. Her chest tightened, and she felt a knot form in her throat, aching and throbbing with pain. She opened her mouth to answer, but only a weak squeak came out. After several seconds, she closed her mouth and closed her eyes in defeat. She looked like she was about to cry, or hyperventilate. As it was, her body trembled.

Luna frowned a little, but stayed silent, watching the pegasus. She watched on as Rainbow gradually let her head fall to face the floor, and her ears pinned back. Eventually, she opened her eyes, but they remained empty, save for a haunted expression. Rainbow stared down at the couch cushion and a weak whimper escaped her lips. "Rainbow Dash..." Luna started cautiously, "what happened..?"

Rainbow couldn't look at Luna, and she couldn't answer. Her throat was too tight from the knot. She couldn't even swallow it back. Even if she could, what was she to say? How could she say it? How could she fix what happened? Could she fix what happened? The look of raw betrayal and brokenness that Twilight had looked at her with lingered in her mind. She clenched her eyes shut and pressed her forehead into the couch, trying to stave off tears, to no avail.

Luna's expression softened. She sighed softly, then used her magic to cause a wave of exhaustion to flood Rainbow's body, immediately causing her to go limp and drift back to sleep. Luna watched Rainbow for a couple of minutes, noting that her tears refused to stop even in her sleep. Eventually, she averted her gaze, then stood back up. She calmly strode towards the hallway, then turned to the right. She continued down the hallway, then stopped at the bedroom and looked inside. As before, the room was left a disarrayed mess. Luna looked at all of it evenly, having already seen it before searching out Rainbow.

She lingered for a little bit, then her muzzle scrunched up in disgust at the smell. She turned back down the hallway, heading for the door. As she strode towards the exit, she noticed that unlike before, the house had a feeling of emptiness- the normal warmth and happiness that usually welcomed her was nowhere to be found. She pushed the thought aside as she stepped out onto the street and spread her wings.


Princess Celestia wore a pained grimace, and her eyes were tired. She continued watching Twilight, running her forehoof through her mane in slow, gentle strokes, parting her mane and brushing it like how she had done when Twilight had been just a filly. Despite her best efforts to calm and comfort her, Twilight continued to shake and shiver, although her tears and sobbing had ceased. She still let out the occasional, soft, broken whimper of pain, and every one made Celestia's heart throbbed painfully and physically pained her. She licked her dry lips and swallowed back the tightness in her throat. After another second, she blinked, then reluctantly turned her head towards the doorway.

Luna stood there silently, watching Twilight and her sister warily.

"Anything?" Celestia asked softly, not wanting to disturb Twilight.

Luna slowly bobbed her head. A few seconds passed, then she calmly stepped into the room and closed the door to the bedroom behind her. She approached Twilight, scrutinizing her. Her brow creased, and her lips twisted downward. "She is still awake..?" she asked curiously.

Celestia nodded hesitantly, then looked back at Twilight. The alicorn laid halfway curled up on her stomach, with her head buried in Celestia's shoulder. Most of Twilight's body was hidden by Celestia's left wing, covering and protecting her.

"Has she said anything..?" Luna asked cautiously.

Celestia shook her head. "No... just... it's been an hour, and she hasn't said anything or stopped whimpering and shivering..." she trailed off and pulled Twilight closer to her with her enveloping wing. She would have felt better if Twilight felt cold since she could at least help warm her up, but as it was, they were both warm. But that warmth didn't seem to help Twilight feel any better.

"Do you want me to help her sleep?" Luna inquired.

Celestia's forehoof stopped midstroke. She blinked, then looked back at Luna. Luna looked at Twilight sympathetically. Celestia studied her sister's features for several seconds, then turned back to look down at Twilight when she whimpered again.

"It may help her, sister," Luna coaxed.

Celestia nodded slowly. She leaned down and nuzzled Twilight's head, trying to get her attention. "Twilight?" she asked in her soft, motherly voice. Twilight shifted and pressed up against her a little more, a quiet whimper escaping her throat. Celestia swallowed. "Luna's going to help you sleep..." she said softly. She watched Twilight for any reaction, but none was forthcoming. She pried her eyes off of Twilight and then looked at Luna.

Luna nodded slowly, then walked around to the bed. She lit her horn with her bright blue aura, casting a dim yet pure blue light throughout the dimly lit bedroom, and she gently touched her horn to Twilight's horn.

Twilight's body and mind resisted, but ever so slowly, her shivering ceased, and her whimpers were silenced. Her chest rose and fell calmly. Twilight's resistance finally faded, and she laid there limply as she slept. Luna lifted her head back up and watched the two of them.

Celestia swallowed, then looked back at Luna. "What happened?" she pleaded.

Luna pursed her lips and bobbed her head. "I... am not entirely sure," she admitted. "Although..." she trailed off, grimacing. "I believed that they wanted to wait until they were married, but..."

Celestia frowned. "Did they-"

"They may have," Luna acknowledged. "Their bedroom was... a mess... but... I... do not know," she admitted. "Rainbow was on the couch, sleeping. I asked her what had happened, but she did not give me an answer," she stated.

Celestia slowly looked back at Twilight and shifted her weight. She lit her horn with her magic, then went over Twilight's body, using her magic to examine her. "Twilight's still a virgin," she said quietly. She shifted her weight uncomfortably, then looked back at Luna. "Are you sure that-"

Luna frowned. "Yes. The smell was... distinctive."

Celestia looked away from Luna and stared at the wall for several seconds. She blinked, and her eyes darted from spot to spot as she thought. "And Rainbow-"

"Yes," Luna acknowledged.

Celestia pursed her lips, then swallowed. She reluctantly looked back over at Twilight's sleeping form. "Then... what... happened?"

Luna looked away from Celestia and Twilight. "I... could visit their dreams, but... given the circumstances, I am not comfortable with violating their privacy."

Celestia grimaced and nodded slowly. "That's okay, Luna. We'll... just have to figure it out another way. In the morning, I will talk with Rainbow."

Luna nodded. "Very well. She does seem to take better to you than me, despite us sharing the Element of Loyalty." She waited a few seconds, watching Celestia and Twilight. "Did you need anything else, sister?" she asked.

Celestia slowly shook her head. "No... I'll stay with Twilight tonight," she said softly. "I can't just... leave her like this."

"That may be for the best," Luna agreed."I will see to it that her room is prepared, in case she stays for a while."

Celestia nodded, then looked back at Luna.

Luna watched them for a few more seconds, then she turned around and silently strode out of the bedroom. She closed the door behind her with barely a sound.

Celestia stared at the door for several minutes before she yawned. She blinked a few times, then looked back over at Twilight. She laid her head down near Twilight's and pulled her body closer, then closed her eyes.


Rainbow groaned as a knocking sound broke the silence filling the house. Her head pulsed and throbbed painfully, making her press her head hard into the couch in an attempt to muffle the pain. Eventually, the lack of moving eased the throbbing away. She hesitantly lifted her head up and groggily opened her eyes. Bright sunlight immediately assaulted her. "Gah!" she groaned, clenching her eyes in order to protect them from the bright morning light.

The knocking came again. She reluctantly blinked her eyes open and allowed them to slowly adjust to the light. She groaned as her head resumed throbbing from her hangover. She sighed, then slowly pushed her body up into a sitting position. She reluctantly slid off the couch and stood up, narrowly avoiding slipping off the couch and falling onto the floor. She wobbled a bit on her legs, then she looked around the room. She reluctantly shuffled towards the hallway. Her muzzle scrunched up in disgust, though it almost immediately disappeared to be replaced by an empty expression.

'Why did I do that...'

She swallowed and blinked, then shook her head. She winced as her head pulsed painfully, but she fought through it and shuffled towards the door. Every step felt like it took longer than the last. Normally, she may not have been as well-groomed as Rarity, but she would have at least considered herself presentable, but after last night, she still hadn't cleaned up, leaving her a self-conscious, disheveled mess as she reluctantly cracked the door open.

"Good morning, Rainbow Dash," Celestia's calm, warming voice greeted.

Rainbow froze at the sound of the familiar, caring voice, and kept the door just barely cracked open. She didn't see Celestia, and Celestia didn't' see her, but both of them knew the other was there. For several seconds, she didn't breathe, and when she finally did, her chest felt tight.

"May I come in?" Celestia asked softly.

Rainbow swallowed, and almost instinctively opened the door a little more, although it was a painfully slow process. As the gap slowly widened, she could see the street beyond was deserted. Eventually, Celestia's majestic, multicolored tail came into her sight in all of its billowing, ethereal glory. She swallowed as the white of Celestia's coat made itself known, and she felt like she was on a stage with everypony staring at her as the door opened enough to reveal Celestia's face. Despite Celestia's gentle, unassuming smile, she felt the urge, no, the need to run away as fast as she could as Celestia's eyes traced over her unkempt, impure body.

Rainbow blinked and swallowed, then blinked several times. She took a couple steps back and to the side, and Celestia calmly stepped inside the doorway and into the hallway. Rainbow stared at the alicorn as she closed the door with her magic. She pinned her wings to her side and stood rigidly, though fidgeting on her hooves, yearning to run away from her as fast as she could.

"Can we talk?" Celestia asked in an unassuming, gentle tone.

Rainbow swallowed again, then quickly nodded. She winced at the throb of pain in her head. Celestia's brow creased and she frowned. After a moment, there was a flash of soft yellow light, and a wave of relief washed over Rainbow, vanquishing the pain emanating from her head as the toxins were banished from her body.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

Rainbow studied Celestia's form and licked her lips. A flicker of a memory passed through her mind, and she could see it in her eyes. The flicker grew, and for a moment, reality faded away as the memory replayed itself in her mind. Her chest and throat tightened. She closed her eyes, then shook her head. She opened her mouth to say no, but all that came out was a high-pitched squeak, making herself feel like a foal in front of the princess.

A soft wing slid around her side, and after a moment, she felt Celestia's warm, soft coat against her body. She opened her eyes and looked at Celestia in disbelief as she gently pulled her against her body. Rainbow didn't have it in her to resist, and so she let Celestia hold her. She took a breath, only for her chest to shudder from pain as she inhaled.

"What happened?" Celestia asked softly.

Rainbow opened her mouth, but she still didn't know what to say. All that escaped was another squeak.

Celestia held her a little closer with her wing. "Just relax... take your time," she said softly. Rainbow sniffled and shuddered as she struggled to hold herself together. "Just let it out..." Celestia coaxed softly.

Rainbow clenched her jaw and vigorously shook her head. Letting it out would make it real, it would be admitting that it actually happened, admitting that she had broke Twilight's heart, something she had promised not to do. Despite her best efforts to stop herself, her eyes started to burn. She pressed them closed and fought valiantly against the pain and memories, but the more she fought, the longer they lingered in her mind, whispering condemnation into her ears over her failure. It was a cycle that fed on itself- the more she tried to fight it, the longer the memory of how Twilight looked at her lingered, the more she felt hopelessly condemned, and thus the more she thought about how badly she had hurt Twilight last night.

Every time she tried to say something, all that came out was a squeak. Her throat was too tight to speak, even swallowing didn't help. Her body shuddered with every breath, despite how rigid she held herself. She bit her lip hard enough to draw blood in an attempt to distract herself, but the pain from her broken lip barely registered in her mind which was too consumed by replaying the same thoughts over and over again, without any relent or mercy. One of the feelings which stood out was the heat rolling down her muzzle from her eyes, almost tickling her muzzle, despite her eyes being forced closed as tight as she could.

"W-where... i-is she?" Rainbow finally squeaked out, her voice crackling uncontrollably from pain.

It took Celestia a few seconds to make it out. She held Rainbow a little tighter, then let up on her grip. "She is at the castle," she replied in a soft, calm tone. "Perhaps... it would be best if my sister and myself stayed out of this... this matter is between you and Twilight..."

Rainbow sobbed once and leaned forward, her forelegs wobbling from weakness.

"Rainbow Dash?" Celestia asked softly. She slowly unfolded her right wing and reacher around to caress the edges of Rainbow's closed eyes with a feather to brush her tears away, but almost immediately, the tears returned. She felt a throb of pain in her chest.

Rainbow hesitantly opened her eyes and stared ahead at the empty, blurry wall. She hesitantly looked up at Celestia. "H-how... I fix th-th-this?" she choked out.

Celestia's lips curved downward. "I cannot say, Rainbow... I do not know for sure what has happened between you and Twilight, but... both of you are hurting badly. Twilight hasn't even spoken since she showed up..." she trailed off quietly. "I... know I offered to stay out of this matter, but... do you want to talk about what happened?" she asked softly.

Rainbow swallowed. The tight knot lingered. She hung her head and averted her gaze from Celestia's eyes. Even her attempts to look away from her couldn't completely hide Celestia's pure white coat from her sight. She swallowed again, almost desperately. She pressed her eyes closed and tried to steady herself by focusing all of her willpower on taking one deep breath. Her body still shuddered as she inhaled. She held the breath, then exhaled and inhaled again, once more causing her body to shake. She licked her dry lips and ignored the indentation left in them from biting down hard enough to draw blood. 'Just say it. She'd want me to... maybe... she'll forgive me...' She whimpered softly. Instead of thinking of Twilight making her heart flutter, or bringing a memory of her happy, sweet giggle, or a soft, yet still bright smile, all it brought was the memory of her haunted expression from last night.

She sobbed again, croaking.

"I-I slept with another mare!" she squeaked out. Immediately, her body tensed up completely, locking up and staying as rigid as a stone.

Celestia was silent.

Rainbow's forelegs wobbled, despite her best efforts to not move, then they gave out as another thought slithered through her mind, and she fell down onto the floor. She buried her head in her forehooves and whimpered. "A-and s-she saw!" she squealed.

Celestia stared down at Rainbow unmoving, her wing still frozen as if Rainbow was still sitting, held up against her body. After several seconds, she swallowed and absently folded her wing. 'Twilight... Rainbow, you broke her heart... I am so sorry...' She swallowed and closed her eyes. 'You're both hurting so much...'

Rainbow had betrayed Twilight in more than one way, too, and Celestia knew it. She was at a loss of what to do, of how to move on. She knew what to say, saying it was easy, offering advice on how to fix it was easy. Actually fixing it wasn't easy- a few magical words just wouldn't make things okay. Actions had real consequences, especially when something can't be undone.

Celestia licked her lips, then lifted Rainbow up with her magic and turned her around. She lifted a foreleg up, then levitated Rainbow in against her chest. Rainbow whimpered and acted almost like she would try to fight it, but for whatever reason, she didn't. Celestia figured it was because she didn't have the strength left. She wrapped her foreleg around Rainbow, holding her there. Rainbow's cries sounded nearly as pained as Twilight's cries. She wrapped her wings around Rainbow's body, sheltering the shivering pegasus, and then she laid her head down on Rainbow's head and gave her a short nuzzle. Despite her chest muffling Rainbow's sobs, she could still hear them.


No matter what Luna did, all Twilight did was lay there, staring blankly at the blanket below her. She wouldn't even acknowledge anything Luna said, and so Twilight remained silent. Because Twilight stayed silent, Luna remained quiet, still standing watch over her and keeping her company, despite Twilight seeming to not even notice her. Twilight looked lost in thought and preoccupied, but there was also an emptiness to her; she wasn't entirely there, or perhaps worse, she simply wasn't there.

If she didn't know any better, Luna would say that she was watching a corpse, but Twilight's periodic blinking ruled out that possibility, as did her calm, shallow breathing.

The door quietly opened, accompanied by the gentle thrum of magic. Luna's ears perked up, but she continued to watch Twilight. After a second, hoofsteps hit the floor and grew in volume. "Sister," she acknowledged casually.

The hoofsteps continued their approach without ceasing, and the door was closed by magic. After a few seconds, Celestia came to a stop beside her younger sister. "Anything?" she asked softly, her eyes looking over Twilight's downcast form. Twilight didn't even acknowledge her arrival.

Luna shook her head. "She has neither said a word nor moved from that spot since she woke up," she answered. She reluctantly looked away from Twilight to study her sister's expression. Celestia looked almost haunted, but she could see that she was also deep in thought. "What of you?" she asked.

Celestia pursed her lips. "Not here," she said softly. "I do not want to... disturb... Twilight..." she trailed off.

Luna nodded, then hesitantly pulled away from the doorway and walked into the study. Celestia joined her and closed the door to Twilight's bedchambers. Celestia's horn pulsed with her soft, yellow aura, and the walls took on a shimmering appearance for a moment before fading. "You do not wish Twilight to hear," Luna noted.

"I don't want it leaving this room," Celestia corrected.

Luna nodded curtly. "What has transpired?"

Celestia sighed and sat down on her haunches. She looked over the bookshelf and bobbed her head. "Rainbow... she was unfaithful."

Luna was silent for a moment. "Rainbow was with another mare," she surmised cooly.

Celestia hesitantly nodded. "From what she said, Twilight saw..."

Luna recoiled slightly. "That..." she trailed off.

"She's hurting, Luna. Both of them are," Celestia stated. "Rainbow regrets what she did. When I asked her why, she says she doesn't know. She said she had been drinking, but that-"

Luna's nostrils flared. "So, because she was drinking, she intoxicated herself and compromised her judgment, then decided to break two oaths to Twilight in one night," she growled.

"Luna," Celestia chastized calmly.

Luna looked at Celestia sharply. "She bears the Element of Loyalty," she growled.

Celestia sighed and nodded. "Perhaps that may be another reason why Twilight is hurting so much. Since Rainbow is supposed to be loyal, then... this has hit her even harder." She shook her head. "I told her to talk to Twilight, but she's afraid Twilight hates her now. I think she hates herself..." she trailed off. "Still, even if Rainbow did make a mistake, this... I do not like it. Even if she did get drunk, practically everypony knows about her and Twilight... I do not believe anypony in their right mind would... jeopardize that..." she said quietly.

"You believe there is something else at play, sister?" Luna asked cautiously.

Celestia bobbed her head. "I don't know. There could be. It seems suspect that anypony would sleep with her when the wedding is next month, however, it could still simply be a case that both of their judgments were compromised..." she trailed off and sighed.

"Regardless, this does not change that Rainbow broke two oaths to Twilight," Luna stated.

Celestia reluctantly nodded. "I don't know how we can help them. Well... perhaps I should say I do not know if we can help them. This is a matter between them. We can always give them advice, but we cannot fix it for them."

Luna nodded cautiously. "Perhaps they need time away from each other, or perhaps the best way to help Twilight would be to keep Rainbow away from her."

"Luna..." Celestia said warily. She looked at her sister with a tired expression. "You know how much those two love each other. You know how much Rainbow means to Twilight."

"And Rainbow broke her heart," Luna replied.

Celestia remained silent. After a few seconds, she glanced down at the floor. She studied the marble floor for a moment before looking back at the bookshelf. "I will see if Cadance can help..." she said quietly.

"What if Twilight does not want help, sister? What if she never wants to see Rainbow again?" Luna asked. "Have you considered that?"

Celestia looked at Luna almost hopelessly. After a few seconds, she looked away from her. Her eyes were almost glossy. "I don't know... I-I just want them to be happy," she whispered.

Author's Note:

When I first wrote this, I didn't really consider how intrusive Celestia's little examination of Twilight's body was...

Also, I should probably mention that these first two chapters have been written for like 5-6 months. Chapter 3 had been mostly written, but I didn't finish it until maybe a month or two ago...

I sort of feel like this story needs the drama tag, but it's not really all that dramatic.

I hope you're all enjoying this.