11 - I Am That Is
Adnam'heir aka Chemical Fire - 5th of Plantation, 29 AE
Ponyville - Equestria
This world’s magic is amusing. Plenty of realms in the infinite cosmos have magic. Not all that I have visited have had it, not even most, perhaps two fifths. The ratio may of course be larger, or smaller. I am limited to my own subjective viewpoint after all. It is of course quite possible that I had chanced upon more mundane realms than magical through the many years.
But this Equis, it was delightfully unique. Normally magic is this strange force which exists apart from nature, an entity unto itself which can only be understood by those who dedicated their entire lives to the study of its detached field. As if it were an entire separate science.
Equis’s magic wove itself into every part of this reality. Magic WAS physics here. Space-time curved to create the illusion which mortals call gravity because that’s what magic told it to do. If this were the extent of magic’s entwinement with the universe, I would have found it interesting, but nothing more than that.
The beings who lived here were the key. In other realms, they would have possessed a measure of magic. Here? Here they were a part of magic themselves. Every atom of their body, every electron of energy in their minds, every thought, every feeling, every action; all in accordance with the simple rules of magic itself.
Most realms have humans. Most humans have someone who comes up with the idea ‘We are the universe's means of exploring itself.’. An arrogant assumption based on instinctual need to be important.
For these ponies? For the other people with which they shared their world? It was true! They existed because magic willed it, and their universe existed as a physical expression of magic itself.
I wonder if they knew how special they were? Perhaps that is why most ponies are so happy?
Or perhaps it's the interesting way magic responds to bonds of friendship. In no other world I had been to in all of my inconceivable years had I ever found a world where reality itself rewarded mages with more power in direct proportion to their number and quality of friendships.
When you’ve seen as many universes as I have, you discover that they exist within a certain set of rules. There are a few constants, but most of the Universe Equation is composed of variables. There are so many different ways for everything that is to be. So many that a mortal could only perceive them as an infinity.
Infinities are a funny thing. Even a child understands that there are infinite numbers. Explain to them that there are an infinite number of decimals between each number, and they will come to understand an important truth. There are infinitely more real numbers than whole numbers.
One infinity can be larger than another. Or to put it into terms of universes; there are infinitely more possibilities a universe could be, than there are configurations universes do take even though there are infinite configurations taken by univerces.
Against all odds, all trends, and all rules I knew, this universe in which I found myself existed in its present state. This world was special, perhaps even unique. It needed to be defended, cared for, and cherished.
Which is what I was doing on a roadside bench in Ponyville all day. Cherishing the universe in all its splendor. A shame I couldn’t get one of the mortals to quark gaze with me due to their limited senses. They make such beautiful patterns here. As do the neutrinos. The poor things were missing out on most of their world’s beauty.
Note to self: Acquire painting supplies.
I was grateful for the chance I had to get out of Lyra’s laboratory and see more of Ponyville. If we maintained our boss-employee/friends relationship after breaking her curse, I would have to show her how to create dangerous devices more often. I don't understand why ‘I would like to not be here right now.’ isn’t a valid reason to leave one’s place of employment, but ‘If this device malfunctions I will die so long as I am within three kilometers.’ is.
The trick would be finding more destructive devices which were only a threat to people like me. I’d have to think of something, because small ponies are adorable and fun to talk too.
The sun was setting, I had made my way to Sherbert’s home to have a much needed conversation with her, and had been told upon arrival (by a neutron star powered Cyborg of all possible people) that Sherbert was out and would be back in a few hours.
So I’d sat down on a bench in front of their large bay-and-gable home and waited.
For the first hour, I had no company other than a rather small pony occasionally giving me fearful looks through a window in Sherbert and her astonishingly-awesome-roommate's home. Under the assumption the two were in fact a couple and raising a child, I took it upon myself to wave to the little one every time she looked out. By the end of the first hour, her fear was replaced by mere curiosity.
I’d wanted to say hello, but upon asking was told ‘Kazumi doesn't go outside’. And since I didn’t want to enter Sherbert home without her permission, it was back to waiting. Lonely, lonely, lonely waiting.
Much to the delight of this impossibly old soul who still perceives time on the mortal level, my loneliness did not last for long. It would seem that a small stallion wrapped in a cloak, seated upon a bench for hours on end attracts a particular sort of company.
Oh! I should be almost done telling them that story. I should switch my primary focus back to my body to see their reactions better.
“Below, the whole Universe twinkled at Rincewind,” I said to the tiny jade-colored pegasus mare, resisting the urge to send her and her two friends images of what I was describing. “There was Great A'Tuin, huge, ponderous, and pocked with craters. There was the little Disc Moon. There was a distant gleam that could only be the Potent Voyager. And there were all the stars, looking remarkably like powdered diamonds spilled on black velvet, the stars that lured and ultimately called the boldest towards them…
“The whole of Creation was waiting for Rincewind to drop in. He did so. There didn't seem to be any alternative. And that’s where the story ends.”
“W-what!?” The small earth pony next to the mare yelped, his eyes wide with surprise. “He just dies!? That’s IT!?”
I really needed to remember what Vinyl told me you call young ponies… Bolts and lillies? No, that’s not right. Bah! Stupid mortals, calling children something different in every last universe I’d ever been too. Just call them kids! It’s really jerkish to make people like me need to remember half a Graham's Number different ways to say ‘child’.
The little pegasus gave her shocked friend a punch to his shoulder. A light one. More affectionate than anything else.
“No, you dummy!” She exclaimed rolling her eyes. “Scr- Uh… Scr… Screefee-”
“Scrofula,” I said for her.
“Yeah! He said that Rincewind would reincarnate,” she correctly pointed out.
“I don’t know what that means!” Her friend shot back.
“That’s cuz you don’t pay attention to Miss Cheerilee,” their crystalline friend giggled. “It means he comes back!”
It was just so strange that the crystal pony wasn’t a construct… I had to remember that silicon based lifeforms were a thing here. And that apparently carbon based lifeforms could birth them.
I should also do my best to remember these specific ponies names. They had seen me sitting completely still and assumed I was some sort of undead creature and ventured forth to slay me. With a little plastic sword sized for an action figure. Because that’s the only ‘weapon’ they could find.
I liked them!
“Oh…” The little Earth pony said with an-
Rock Candy! That was his name.
“What happened to him next?” Aurora (the little pegasus) asked me with wide hopeful eyes.
She’d stabbed me in the face. Even yelled ‘Die, foul monster!’ like a proper hero of yore. Admittedly her little toy’s sword snapped in two, and she’d looked so crestfallen at her failure, rather than what she would have thought was her imminent demise. Then she cursed the toy maker calling them liars since the sword was marketed as a blade of evil’s bane.
I liked her the most.
I chuckled. “I don’t want to spoil that story. It’s quite good,” I said with an apologetic smile.
Her hopefully eyes twinkled mischievously as she wrapped her face into the most adorable looking sadface ever. Unfortunately for her plans, I’d seen the twinkle.
“That won’t work on me, young lady,” I informed her with a wink. “I’m the younger sibling in my family.”
Aurora stamped a hoof in irritation. “Awwww! Come on! I wanna know!”
“Yeah!” Her red-and blue speckled crystalline friend echoed in agreement.
I wanted to say her name was Terrance? No, no couldn’t be. That wasn’t a pony name.
So many years. So many names. They all blend.
I shook my head slowly. “I would happily tell you that story, but it’s rather long and it’s getting late. Shouldn’t you be going home?”
Rock’s ears flopped back, pushed down flat by a wave of primal fear which also pulled his eyes open wide. “EEP! Mom’s gonna be so mad!” He squeaked, turning to the other small pony. “We need to go, Snootle!”
Snootle? Was that her name? Sounds like a nickname… But that could be a pony name.
ARGH! CURSE YOU, HUGE DATABASE OF QUINTILLIONS OF INTERLINKED NAMES AND FACES OF PEOPLE I KNOW!
Snootle frowned fearfully and nodded in instant agreement. “Y-yeah! Bye, Aurora!” He called, quickly running off down the street, Rock following close behind after giving his own farewell.
Aurora remained sitting in front of me on the sidewalk.
I looked down at her and raised an eyebrow. “I was talking to all three of you,” I reminded the little one with a knowing smirk.
She returned my smirk with one of her own. “My parents are dead.”
She said it with such truth and conviction that I knew she couldn’t possibly be lying. But the way she said it well… She said it like the sky was blue. Either they died before she was old enough to have memories, or they had died a long time ago.
“I said ‘go home’, not ‘go to your parents’, Aurora,” I reminded jovially. “I’m really just a big kid inside. I still know all the tricks.”
“I don’t have a home. That’s a grown up thing,” Aurora rebutted coyly.
I couldn’t help but grin ear to ear. “You’re a great kid,” I said reaching down to give her mane a little ruffle. “Go back to whomever looks after you. The mares who live in this house know how to contact me. I can tell you stories another day.”
Aurora frowned. “But I want to hear more now! And you’re still just sitting here because whats-her-name isn’t back yet,” she protested.
I sighed. “I know that’s what you want,” I said, shifting in my seat slightly. “But what about your guardian’s wants? I’m certain they want to know you’re safe at night.”
“I don’t have any,” Aurora grumped, crossing her forelegs over her barrel.
I rolled my eyes at the little liar.
“You’re too clean and well fed to be a street orphan,” I informed, waving a hoof at her freshly washed coat.
“I take baths at the pool,” Aurora countered. “And there’s farms everywhere, and I can fly.”
I looked her directly in her bright purple eyes with as serious an expression as I could muster. “Are you really homeless, or are you lying so I’ll tell you more stories even though it’s late?”
Aurora sighed. “I don’t have parents or guardians, or a home,” she said suddenly performing a series of gestures as she intoned, “Cross my heart, hope to fly. Stick a cupcake in my eye.”
I saw it. The spark of magic accompanying the gesture. The Pink One, an oath had been sworn in her name, and she knew!
I paused for a short moment. I’d seen her teleport…
Nope. No hyperactive pink mare appearing to school the little one for lying in her ‘name’.
“I find that hard to believe,” I said despite the evidence before me. “Your friends go to school together, and talked about classes. Your teacher would know if you-”
“Oh!” Aurora exclaimed suddenly. “I don’t REALLY go to school with them. I just hide in the library and read about whatever Rock says was taught in class that day.”
“Mmm…” I said slowly. “And you’ve never been caught?”
“Sure I have!” she giggled. “Mister Mix, the librarian, he doesn't know everypony who goes to the school. He just kicks me out of the library and tells me to go to class. Then I just sneak out for the rest of the day.”
“Okay,” I said slowly. “But if that’s true, why haven't you gone to anyone for help? I know there’s an orphanage in town.”
Aurora returned my serious gaze with one of her own, even leaning forward for dramatic effect.
“It’s evil,” she said ominously.
“Ah,” I said nodding slowly. “You’ve been there?”
Aurora nodded once. “Sleeping under a cloud house on my own cloud is better,” she said with a sad wine.
Mmm, there it was. The lie. She didn’t like being homeless, but she liked whatever went on in the orphanage even less, and managed to successfully run away.
“How long have you been on your own?” I asked.
“Um… Six winters? Maybe seven?” She replied with a little shrug.
I looked up the street. No one. Turning my head I looked down the street. Also no one.
Looks like it had to be me. Alright. I could do that.
I devoted a part of my mind to weaving a set of fortune boosting and protective enchantments, and cleared my throat.
Picking the little pony up with my magic, I set her next to me on the bench and wrapped the hem of my cloak around her.
“Here, it will get a bit cold. It wouldn't be fair to continue Rincewind’s story without your friends. Would’ you like to hear another one from the same world?” I offered kindly.
“Please!” Aurora exclaimed happily, her darkish blue tail wagging happily.
Hehe! I loved how despite being equines these ponies looked a little bit like cats and acted a bit like dogs. This is the best universe!
“Okay, I’ll tell you another story tonight if you promise me something. You will come back here tomorrow, just before school starts so I can give you a proper breakfast,” I said as adamantly as I could.
Aurora blinked at me. “Uh, that’s supposed to be a terrible price to pay?” She asked with a confused frown.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not a litch, and even if I was, they don’t make deals for souls,” I said, trying to hold in a laugh. “I just want to know you’re okay. This is a remarkably nice place, but it’s still not safe for a little girl to be out on her own all the time.”
Aurora hummed. “Can you get me some cheese?” She asked hopefully.
“Cheese omlets it is,” I said decisively.
Aurora wiggled a bit deeper into the fold of my cloak I’d offered her. I willed the fabric to stretch and thicken, giving her more to bundle up with. Fortunately, she didn’t seem to notice the change.
“Sooo story now?” she asked hopefully.
I nodded.
“Everything starts somewhere. Though many physicists disagree,” I began, leaning back against the bench. “People have always been dimly aware of the problem with the start of things. They wonder aloud how the snowplough driver gets to work, or how the makers of dictionaries look up the spelling of the words.
“Yet there is the constant desire to find some point in the twisting, knotting, ravelling nets of space-time on which a metaphorical finger can be put to indicate that here, right here, is the point where it all began. In their search, most people turn to the oldest stories they can find, and say ‘Here it is. This is how it all began.’ But they are wrong.
“Most people forgot that the very oldest stories, the ones from which all others come, are, sooner or later, about blood.”
I paused as Aurora gently tugged on my sleeve. “Is this a story about an ancient warlord or something?” She asked curiously.
“No. It’s actually the story of DEATH and his granddaughter Suzan saving Hearthswarming from total annihilation by a group of evil Old Ones known as the Auditors,” I answered with a grin.
Aurora’s ears perked up with interest. “I didn’t know that people told stories about Dusk!”
Note to self: Find out who Dusk is.
“Um… No, it’s not about anyone named Dusk,” I corrected. “Do you want me to continue?”
Aurora nodded eagerly. “Uh huh! The last one was really good!” She said happily.
I took a breath and resumed reciting the ancient book from memory. If only I could have found a universe to match those stories. It had to be out there somewhere.
I could use a comedy based universe for a vacation home.
“Our story begins in Ankh-Morpork, the twin city of proud Ankh, and pestilent Morpork. The biggest city in Discworld. A city where magic is just another job, and the Tower of Art of the Unseen University of Wizards looms over all the dark narrow streets. It is the first night of a midwinter festival bearing a remarkable resemblance to your Hearthswarming.
“And so it was the night before Hogswatch…”
Sherbert - 5th of Plantation, 29 AE
Ponyville - Equestria
“That train was the WORST!” Ash groaned as we pulled our cart up the street.
“Tell me about it,” I agreed, ears plastered flat with annoyance.
Just like they had been since we left the train station.
“We had a railway worker on the train!” Ash grumbled again. “I don't get your bureaucracy. Back home he would have been put on duty the second he encountered a problem within his profession! But nope! Can’t do that here. He’d get in trouble if he just fixed the stupid tracks in the time it took for a repair crew to get out there...”
“Yeah, well, in Equestria we respect off hours,” I sighed. “Even if that screws four hundred ponies out of three hours of their lives.”
“I hope none of the groceries went bad,” Ash said looking back over her shoulder at our full cart with a worried frown.
“Eh… Cart should have kept them fine. I replaced the crystals powering the preservation charm last month,” I said with as much of a shrug as the cart would allow. “Better question: Why the hay did we pick up groceries too? The stock is heavy enough!”
Ash giggled and shook her head. “You tell me, it was your idea,” she teased, sticking out her tongue.
“Tami had better appreciate her stupid forge, that’s all I’m saying,” I grumbled, wincing slightly as the cart’s harness dug into my shoulders.
We had to be pulling at least ten tons. I didn’t resent Tami for wanting to get back into an old hobby of hers, or even the trip itself. It’s just that this sucked. It sucked hard. And it was my own stupid fault for offering to pick up the forge and fuel and stuff she’d ordered from Manehattan for her.
Tami was almost completely a machine. She could pull this all day no problem. But noooo! I just had to have the dumb idea to do it for her so I could get out of the house for a while.
I’d just been too hung up on ‘Chem’ all week. I’d needed to get away from the problem to have the chance to think it through properly instead of stew.
I’d been sort of a jerk to him. He had to be nice. He’d had a whole week with direct access to two of the three princesses and almost total trust from everyone around him.
Nothing bad had happened. Not one thing.
There was so much he could have done. Make Twilight think she received a Declaration of War from Drake. Fake an assassination attempt on Luna with his VR powers. Arrange the destruction of a town and make it look like some cult had blown everyone up and drop hints that other towns were next to sew terror.
Nothing. None of that. He’d just hung out with Twilight once or twice and helped Lyra build a machine.
A Machine that could have been a doomsday device, but I had it on good authority that it wasn't designed in any way that would make sense for a WMD, and in fact didn’t seem to really DO anything at all as far as the material world was concerned (Thanks, Uncle Sky).
I’d been banking on that being his scheme. But Lyra had switched it on this morning. Nothing had happened. Either it failed and Chem was an incompetent threat to the world we could easily stop or… Or it wasn’t a weapon.
All things considered, it was the latter.
He wasn’t a threat. He really was a rare exception. I owed him a huge apology.
“I’ve had a lot of dumb ideas recently,” I said to Ash with a sad sigh, hanging my head slightly.
Ash shrugged. “Eh… Admittedly I thought Kaz could handle meeting Fluttershy too,” she said as we turned the corner onto Galloway Street.
“Well, she did,” I giggled, doing my best to hold the laugh in. “At least until Fluttershy tried to hug her.”
“I’m glad we can laugh at that mess now,” Ash snickered, looking at our house down the way. “Almost ther- Huh… Looks like we have a visitor. Or Twilight decided to allow busses and put a stop in front of our place.”
I looked up with a confused frown. The night had just started to roll in making it kinda hard to see, but there was someone sitting on the bench in front of our house.
“No way Twilight let busses run in town. Ponyville’s nowhere big enough to need mass transit across it,” I said slowly as I tried to identify whoever was waiting outfront.
Clothes are something I’d learned to recognise in Neighpone. Neighdo was a HUGE city, and even with as varied in appearance as a pony can be, in a place that big you get a LOT of lookalikes. Clothes help with that.
Cloaks were not common there. Here, where clothes were basically just for costume parties or work uniforms? I knew of TWO people who wore them. Twilight’s Captain of the guard, Shadow, and Chem.
Both of their cloaks were a shade of green, and in this light I wasn’t able to tell what shade the cloak was exactly. Even with my bionic eyes. Not much a camera can do to clear up an optical effect in reality itself.
Ash and I began to trot a bit more slowly. My danger sense was starting to tingle, and Ash had sworn we’d been followed all day… Maybe she’d been right. Maybe stuff was about to go down.
“You have your morpher on you?” I asked casually, keeping my tone consistent so anyone listening in wouldn’t think much of it.
“Mhm, always,” Ash answered, nodding slowly.
Good! She understood.
“I don't think it would help me pull this cart though,” she added with a sigh. “Heh! We could try sticking it into your magic pocket.”
Ah, she was making sure I had my naginata on me. Good girl!
“Yeah, it’s kinda full and a bit too small for anything this big,” I laughed, angling my ears forwards to try and hear anything the distant figure might be saying or doing.
I only had to hear the voice to recognise Chem. But the strange thing was what he was saying. He was telling a story. To no one!
“There illuminated in the light from the burning gates stood a warrior on the battlements. Badrang recalled him in a flash,” Chem recited with a hint of bardic cadence. “This was the one called Martin, the young mouse who had defied his authority, the one he had tied over the gate and imprisoned in the pit. The mouse warrior fought like ten beasts. Reckless of caution, he was everywhere at once, teeth bared, eyes glittering as he threw himself into the fray.”
I raised an eyebrow and looked over at Ash, who was looking back at me equally confused.
“Uh… Soooo it looks like a crazy stallion is reading a book aloud in front of our house,” Ash summarized.
“That’s um… Only a bit inaccurate,” I said quietly.
Ash squinted into the distance. “I don't think that’s a mare?” She said uncertainty. “Kinda smallish, and it is dark… But, I’m pretty sure-”
“No no. I mean I know who that is,” I said before clearing my throat and calling. “Hey! Chemical Fire? What are you doing at my house?”
I hoped that didn’t sound too accusatory.
Chem looked up, turning in my direction. His motion pulling his cloak away enough for me to see a small pegasus filly sitting next to him.
“Hugging the wallshadows, Ba- OOP! Sorry, Aurora, that’s the person I’ve been waiting for. We’ll have to finish later,” Chem said to the filly apologetically.
“Nooo! I was just getting to the end!” Aurora whined, immediately jumping up and buzzing her wings to hover at Chem’s head level as she faced Ash and I. “Go away for another hour! Please!?”
“First, there’s only about ten minutes of story left,” Chem corrected. “Second, this is the third story I’ve told you this evening-”
“But they’re so good! And you don’t skip the fighting! Like in grown up stories!” The filly exclaimed excitedly.
“-Third,” Chem continued, “You should get some sleep. I’ll be around tomorrow.”
“It’s just ten minutes! I’ll wait!” She begged.
Chem sighed, “Oh alright… But only because it’s a good story and I know you’d be up all night wondering what happens.”
I shook my head slowly. Foals. Heh!
Also, he didn’t vaporize the annoyingly energetic little thing. Another point in ‘good guy’ for Chem.
Chem stood up and walked over to me, taking off his cloak with his magic to drape it over Aurora as she sat back down on the bench. A nice gesture. It was kinda chilly out, and she was extra small.
But that was a little bit creepy when you knew that the stallion you were looking at was a puppet and the actual entity was a mask, THAT CLOAK, and a ball of darkness.
At least Aurora looked happy and warm bundled up in the eldritch horror...
“Sorry about that, Miss Sherbert,” Chem apologised as we drew near. “You may find some weeds in your yard near the curb have sprouted, and the grass will be a bit uneven. I uh… I may have gotten carried away and did some time dilation so I could tell her stories in a more efficient amount of time.”
Ash blinked. “Uh… So, Sherb, when did you meet an Archmage?” She asked half impressed half worried.
“Last week. It was a work thing,” I answered before turning back to Chem. “It’s fine. It’s just grass… What are you doing here? I kind of wanted to talk to you but I didn’t expect you to literally be right here when I got back.”
Chem nodded once, his eyes giving me a sad look as he did. “Yes… I wanted to speak with you as well. I know you dislike me, and that’s perfectly alright,” he said in a surprisingly understanding tone of voice. “You’re what… Thirty? Barely grown up as I understand. You can’t be mad at young people for taking things the way they do. You lack experience, and the wisdom which comes with it.
“PLEASE! Do not take that as an insult. I mean it only in so much that I understand why when a very powerful and important person told you in no uncertain terms just how dangerous people like me can be that you took him at face value and didn’t think about the specific circumstances for yourself. That’s perfectly alright. You’re young. That’s just how young people are.”
I tilted my head a little bit. That was a little insulting… But he did have a point. I hadn’t exactly been around that long.
Ash cleared her throat and slipped free of the cart’s harnice, letting it drop as she walked away. “This sounds like an important and private conversation. I’m going to go inside and make dinner,” she said, dismissing herself.
“I won't be long!” I called after Ash as she quickly headed for the front door.
Returning my focus to Chem I shook my head. “I should be the one apologising,” I admitted, hanging my head in shame. “You shouldn’t ever judge someone for what they are, and I did that to you. You’ve had a whole week to do…anything. But you haven't. You’ve just been helping Lyra, or playing with Princess Twilight, or apparently telling stories to fillies in front of my house.”
Chem chuckled. “Well, I suppose I should accept that apology. I do accept it, but at the same time, it’s alright. You’re young, I imagine Discord scared the bejesus out of you… I can sense some trauma related to matters involving my kind from his actions. I asked him how things went with you discovering us.”
I nodded and scratched the back of my head with a hoof. “Um… Maybe a bit? That was really scary…”
“Do you think that just maybe, your fears are understandable, given that and then immediately having to escape a burning building due to some cultists summoning a fellow minor entity, which tried to kill you, only to later run into me?” Chem asked rhetorically. “I understand. And I hold no ill will. I’m glad I do not have to do anything to allay your fears of me having any desire to take over the world, or hurt anyone. I only ever liked that sort of thing in games, after all.”
“You’re right,” I agreed with a nod. “But I still should have payed more attention to the evidence.”
Chem smiled. “So, you’ll be more open in the future?”
“Yeah,” I replied simply.
“Good! Then you’ve learned an important life lesson. None of this was a real mistake,” he said happily.
I was about to reply when Chem suddenly froze for a moment, his eyes glancing over my shoulder, then back to me, but now looking about ten times more excited than a filly who got to have a Pinkie Pie catered birthday.
“Say, Sherbert… You’re a real ninja, right? It’s not just some fake martial arts title?” Chem asked hopefully.
“Shinobi,” I corrected reflexively. “But yeah, I went to a real academy. Why do you ask?”
More importantly, what are you looking at? You either stared off into space or Ash was absolutely correct and we had been followed all day. PLEASE be the former! There’s a filly within ten meters!
Chem beamed me a huge grin, “Do you happen to have a rival of any kind?”
No…
“I did. She’s dead,” I answered bluntly.
Chem nodded twice. “Mhm, mhm… So you could conceivably have a sibling seeking you out on a quest for revenge?” He prompted with way too much hope.
No-no-no…
“Um, well, yes. I could,” I said as the fur on the back of my neck began to tingle.
Please just be Chem wanting to start a game. Please just be Chem wanting to start a game. Please just be Chem wanting to start a game.
“Cool! There’s a ninja on the roof behind you and to your left giving you a death-glare. Can I stick around and watch the ninja battle?” Chem ask-stated with the most hopeful-geek look I’d ever seen in my life.
I spun around as much as the cart and harness would allow. Sure enough, lying flat against the rooftops, was a red and gold clad ninja in full gi. I recognised the flying horse dojo’s uniform instantly.
BUUUUUUUUCK!
I reached down to the bracelet on my left foreleg, opening the magic pocket inside to draw my blade. “THERE’S A FILLY HERE, IDIOT!” I snapped as I whipped the blade out.
“Oh! That’s what you call them,” Chem exclaimed in realization, still sporting the same simple smile.
“Protect her,” I said, rage evaporating into pure confusion at his casual attitude towards the FILLY IN DANGER OF-
Something bladed whistled through the air. I spun around, sweeping my blade up in front of me to deflect a projectile. I sliced air.
The blade wasn’t heading for me. It was heading for Aurora. And I’d already missed my chance to stop it.
Adnam'heir aka Chemical Fire - 5th of Plantation, 29 AE
Ponyville - Equestria
A heartbeat ago, I had been looking forward to a nice one on one ninja battle. I’d assumed with how silly this universe seemed that such a thing would be a high octane version of a GI Joe cartoon battle.
I had not expected the enemy to be the sort of monster who targets a child as their opening assault.
The ninja’s knife slammed into the air in front of Aurora, coming to a dead stop as it struck the defensive wards I’d placed around her. The wards appeared briefly, the intricate lines of the arcane sigils flaring bright green as the attack overloaded them, destroying the spells I had so carefully calibrated to keep her safe.
Safe in a normal scene. From cold. From heatstroke. From germs. They had not been rated for sustained combat.
Better not let the monster know her shields were gone.
I’d just finished those, you dick!
“Aurora is quite safe. Slay that monster, I’m going to make sure she doesn't see it,” I instructed, whirling around to grab the frightened child and-
Aurora had picked up the knife. She was scared, shaking, her eyes wide, but she had picked up the knife, and was holding it in that way every untrained person holds a knife to try and protect themselves.
I ran back over to the bench, hooves pounding against the cobblestones. I heard Sherbert run as well, presumably running for the rooftops.
“Oh, no!” The ninja called mockingly. “You spotted me, and I so tried to be hidden all day. I didn’t remotely intend for this to happen. Now I’m not going to get in trouble for KILLING YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE WHO SAW ME!”
The venom in that voice… Wow. Methinks the mare doth subtle too little.
I scooped up Aurora and my cloak in one swift movement, pulling her off the bench and into my arms forelegs. “You’ll be safe, just hold still and don’t mess with my things,” I warned as I pulled at the walls of reality.
Most voidborn keep a realm for themselves. A universe cataloguing their history. That always seemed excessive to me. I kept a closet instead.
The air warped and rippled around the ‘closet door’ as I set Aurora inside.
“Thank you mister wizard, s-sir!” Aurora squeaked, looking at me with wide terrified eyes that held just a hint of budding courage.
I couldn’t help but smile. I loved this little-
My body registered a sharp pain in my left side. What in the blazes was that?
Oh. She threw a second knife. Mmm, poisoned too, judging by the organic matter coating the blade. Based on the trajectory… She’d been aiming for Aurora. Again.
“You’re going to regret that,” I said to the ninja despite her being too far away to hear me.
Aurora gasped in shock. I flexed a hoof and shifted the door into another spatial dimension, sealing it’s access by mortals, but keeping it accessible to myself. I might need a tool or two.
I slumped over, faking death by shutting my body off. The knife had punctured a lung after all, and learning what I could about a foe before striking was Lesson Number Seven.
I lay face down on the bench, listening to the fight taking place on the rooftop. The constant clash of steel on steel made me wonder exactly what was going on. I longed to abandon this body and watch… But the spells I’d wrought today meant replacing this body would be impossible.
Lyra’s subspace disruptor. Aurora’s protection spells. The time dilation so I could keep telling her stories. Accessing my closet… I was completely out of spare energy.
“I guess you guys are mad the Empress is purging your clan,” Sherbert shouted over the class of blades. “I’ll have to let her know at least one got away.”
“Ha! Why would I care about those week fools?” The ninja snapped in reply.
Something went bang. Not a proper explosion, more of a pop.
The enemy ninja appeared in front of me in a puff of white smoke. “You’re wizard friend’s dead, Sherbert, and this whole street is sealed by magic. No one gets in, no one gets out. It’s just you and me!” She taunted, grinning like a savage behind her mask.
Mmm, yes. I was starting to see the full picture. This was a psychopath, one who played by no rules other than ‘survival of the most brutal’.
Sherbert teleported, her magic leaving a neat little ripple in the nutrieno rain. “Who are you?” She asked, holding her naginata out defensively. “Mai’s sister? Cousin? I’m sorry I killed her, but she was-”
She reached up, and ripped off her mask revealing….
A completely ordinary looking yellow furred red maned pegasus mare! Boo. I’d been hoping for a skull face.
GET OVER HERE! And all that.
Sherbert screeched in terror, nearly dropping her weapon as her eyes widened more than I could possibly imagine. “Y-you’re dead!”
Despite being dead myself, I raised an eyebrow at that remark.
The ninja (presumably Mai) grinned savagely, and lunged forwards, swinging the ball end of her sickle-flail thingie. Sherbert just barely managed to avoid getting her naginata snared by the chain, leaving herself open for the sickle, which she avoided with a quick flip and a teleport behind Mai.
Mai seemed to know where her foe had gone and spun with unnatural speed to block Sherbert’s desperate overhead chop.
“I just went away for a while, bitch,” Mai spat. “I’ll never die. But you? Heh!”
I raised my other eyebrow. Was she bullshitting or…
I ‘squinted’ focusing all of my senses on the monster I saw before me. The monster which was saturated with void stuff. Mmm, yes. A psychopath likely killed by that cult Discord took care of who was ritualistically raised as a supernatural regenerating butcher or something like that. A shame that my kin’s power can be invoked by any who know their names.
A double shame that some of their names can be stumbled upon by accident…
Sherbert swung her blade again, and again, entering a desperate series of fairly advanced looking moves as she did her best to kill the monster before her. Each of her slices ended in a shower of sparks as Mai turned her blade aside with supernatural ease. Toying with her.
Yeah. Okay. You like to toy with opponents less skilled than you eh? Well… I have a thing for that.
Maybe. Hopefully. He sort of hates me.
I focused my consciousness, moving it through my hidden yet still open closet door. Aurora was being a good girl, and sitting just inside, having not touched anything. She wasn’t frightened anymore either.
Good! She felt safe.
Moving away from the entrance I ‘flew’ deeper and deeper into my closet. Past my old costumes, past the keepsakes from my old mortal friends, and to the section I’d reserved for those objects I couldn’t bear to let die with their universes at heat death.
Endless weapons, hosts of armor, books, scrolls, disks, and hard drives galore. A million little things each one as precious to me as gold. Indeed, gold adorned many of my treasures. The simple artistic value of the pieces within this section of my little closet was truly a king’s ransom.
If I sold the jewels, gold, silver, and other refined rare materials here I could do as I pleased on any mortal world of any technological level. The treasures of a thousand universes long dead. A hoard the envy of any dragon. Which is why these things remained here as keepsakes. Using them in any way would be cheating at the game.
But this wasn’t a game. This was life. And she tried to kill a child.
I floated up to a simple cruciform sword which hung on the wall. It’s hilt was plain, wrapped with black strip sof leather. The pommel was decorated with a single red stone; nothing fancy, just a humble carnelian. All in all, a very plain sword, the sort any warrior might be seen carrying. Though the blade did sparkle very nicely.
I placed a ‘hand’ on the hilt.
<Unhand me, villain!> He shouted, his voice as impressive and properly heroic as ever.
<Now now, just because your reincarnation’s grandson killed me while I was being a Pirate King doesn't make me a villain at present,> I refuted.
This guy… Every time. Hopefully this time He’d actually let me wield his blade.
<I tire of your trickery, Darkness. Remove my sword from your vault so it might be found by another and we may do battle once more. Our war will not stop until one of us is truly dead. That was our arrangement!> He reminded me, radiating outrage at my resistance.
<It’s been more seasons that you can possibly comprehend,> I sighed. <I am no longer the evil you knew. Not all universes have good and evil as physical forces. Most places allow people to change their hearts.>
<So you have said before. But how can I put faith in something I have never seen?> The warrior asked, as always. <If you do speak true, many good souls have held my sword in the past. Those I made my champions were few, even amongst their number. Why would I lend my strength to someone who once held evil in their heart? Even if->
I directed his attention out the closet towards the fight. Sherbert was backing away from an increciously ferocious onslaught. Mai’s sickle flashed and twinkled sinisterly as it cut the air, drawing ever closer to Sherbert’s throat.
<If a young hero is about to die at the hands of a monster my kin created?> I asked hoping to prompt him to action.
The warrior was silent for a moment. <Granted, I would absolutely have charged in to save the day in life. But a warrior must face their own challenges or they are no warrior at- By the dark forest, is that a child?!>
<WHAT!?>
I wheeled around to look for myself.
Aurora had gotten out! Somehow she’d gotten out! HOW!? I’d only turned my back for a minute!
The little filly was charging unsteadily on her hind legs, the large knife wielded in both hooves like a sword, her wings outstretched for balance. Grim determination and fear filled her tiny eyes. It didn’t take a psychic to know her every thought was simply ‘Make the bad guy go away’.
<SHE CAN NOT BE HARMED!> I bellowed, ripping the sword off the wall. <YOU WILL ASSIST ME!>
<This once, I shall!> The warrior agreed.
Sherbert - 5th of Plantation, 29 AE
Ponyville - Equestria
How is she alive!?!
I parried her strike with the middle of my naginata haft. The wood chipped and splintered. Not even an earth pony should have been able to chop into the magically hardened wood, but she did.
How is she alive!?!
My heart felt like it was beating one long single beat. But I knew it had to be pumping faster than fast. Cuz I couldn’t think. I couldn’t focus. Magic was out of the question. All my moves were instinctive. Muscle memory struggling to keep me alive.
Alive, how is she alive!?! Chem wasn't alive. Her poison had killed him. Or at least his body. I didn’t know how long it would take him to come back. I was on my own fighting a ghost!
I’d turned Mai into mud. I’d snapped. I felt every last blow. I’d seen what I’d done to her. This was her. I knew it was her! HOW IS SHE ALIVE!?
Mai’s smug face laughed as she whirled the ball end of her kusarigama, swinging the weapon in a savage arc towards my head. My body ducked, instinct again saving me. But dooming my weapon.
The chain wrapped around my nagainata’s haft at long last. Mai cackled and with a savage yank, ripped the weapon from my hooves.
How? How can she be here?
Her eyes burned with a monstrous glee as she flung my weapon away with a casual flick of her forelegs. “I knew this would work, Sherbert,” Mai said through her grin. “I didn’t kill you the first time because of your stupid aunt. I didn’t kill you the second time because of your silly little powers. But this time?”
Mai raised her kama, the blade twinkled as the moonlight danced along the edge.
Mai smirked even wider as she winked at me. “We all know that the third time is the-”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” A tiny voice roared in an equal mix of terror and heroism.
Something hard hit something wet with a thump. Mai screamed in pain.
The scream snapped me back to reality just enough to see the filly Chem had been talking to. Her hooves gripping the handle of the knife that had been thrown at her, which was now embedded a good inch or so into Mai’s back.
Mai whirled around, the knife wrenched out of the little Pegasus’s grip. Mai sneered at her, adjusting her kama’s aim. “You little brat! I just regrew that kidney last week!”
“NO!” I screamed, lunging forwards as her blade fell.
Her sickle flashed. The filly’s eyes locked onto her blade. I saw the murderous edge reflected in her purple eyes.
I didn’t need to tell my magic what to do. My hoof launched forwards, propelled by the wave of arcane power now coursing through my veins. I grabbed hold of Mai’s leg as her blade reached the filly’s ear, clipping a full centimeter off the tip before stopping just above her skull. I’d done it!
Mai growled in rage, her muscles bunching as she moved to retaliate.
The filly didn’t make a sound. She didn't pass out. I don’t think she even knew she’d been cut.
I rammed my other forehoof into the small of Mai’s back, and fell over backwards, throwing her away from the jade filly.
“RUN!” I screamed at her.
“No! She killed my friend!” The little filly anger-sobed.
I didn't have time for this! Mai was going to be back on her hooves any second now. I turned around, raising my hooves and clearing my mind as much as I could. Hoof to hoof against blade NEVER worked in the unarmed pony’s favor. This was going to hurt before I had a chance to wi… Win?
A strange scene unfolded before me.
Chem’s corpse stood up right, and then reared up into a bipedal stance, bones popping and crunching as he rearranged his joints. The knife in his side pushed outwards, clattering to the cobblestones. His eyes opened, focusing on Mai with a hatred I couldn’t even fathom.
“I- but… That poison counteracts magic!” Mai stammered, more than a little confused.
“Rule number twenty five,” Chem intoned, his glare intensifying. “Some heros can not be defeated simply by making them die.”
“YAY!” The filly shouted.
“Then I’ll just have to keep killing you till you stay down!” Mai screamed, reaching into her gi and drawing a wakizashi.
Why am I standing still!? I have a chance to grab my naginata! I turned, looking around the street for my weapon.
There! It had been flung next to my cart. Fifteen meters away. I could make that.
I ran towards my cart. Mai turned, hearing me move. She cursed, starting to turn to intercept me.
Chem’s angry glare deepened to unnatural proportions, contorting into a look that no pony’s face could ever possibly make. It was a look with lifetimes of hatred in it. Focused hatred. A hatred of all evil mixed with extreme self loathing. The look of an evil being which wished for nothing more than to destroy every monster like itself.
My body refused to move as I learned what ‘scared stiff’ really means.
“Rule number one hundred and five: Never, EVER, HURT THE LITTLE ORPHAN GIRL A REFORMED VILLAIN LIKES!” Chem bellowed, slamming his hooves together, producing a flash of white light which he pulled apart, transforming the white light into a blazing bar which became a sword. “DEFEND YOURSELF, MONSTER”
That sword! It looked so ordinary on the outside, but glowed with so much magic it hurt to look at!
Mai raised her wakizashi defensively. She couldn’t see it. She was a pegasus, not a unicorn. She lacked the arcane scenes to know that blade was- Sisters knew what it was other than bucking TERRIFYING!
Mai swung her wakizashi, seeking a preemptive strike. Chem’s longsword flicked downwards, intercepting her strike with absolutely perfect technique. The parry was effortless, perfectly effective, and took seemingly no effort. It was a parry performed by a true master who had spent their lifetime doing nothing but practicing the sword.
And Chem hadn’t performed it.
He hadn’t moved the sword.
I could see them now, the little tendrils of magic flowing from the sword through Chem’s body from the sword. The sword with an aura as bright as an especially powerful pony, like Twilight before her ascension… That blade was alive, and it wielded you.
Mai flicked her blade again, testing Chem’s defense. His sword remained still, ignoring her feint. Mai took a step back and threw a proper cut, slicing upwards seeking to cut Chem from hip to shoulder. The sword barely moved, intercepting the cut so effortlessly it made her well practiced strike look clumsy.
I turned to resume my sprint for my weapon, Chem seemed content to use that magic sword to humiliate or terrify her. But someone needed to be able to defend the poor little-
The filly looked up at me, unstable wobbling as she holding the end of my naginata up for me to take. “I got your sword-stick for you,” she informed helpfully.
“Uh, thanks,” I said uncertainty, taking the weapon from her little hooves.
What even was this filly?!
Chem’s face retained the same grim look as the sword threw his first cut, a simple side flick of the blade. Mai turned, parraying the strike amid a shower of sparks and a horrible shriek of metal on metal as Chem’s sword cut into Mai’s.
He CUT into her SWORD! Not through it, but the deep gouge in the blade was visible from the moment the blades parted. He’d chopped a quarter of the way through it…
“W-what is this horseapples!?” Mai squeaked.
“This is the blade which protected a peaceful people against countless evils for untold millenia, each worse than you by far,” Chem informed. “Inside it’s starmetal blade is the soul of a great warrior whose knowledge and experience spans each and every person to ever wield it in his name over the countless ages. He hates evil even more than I. Particularly the kind that hurts children. Like you!”
I felt two waves of determined righteous fury emanate from Chem. Both he and the sword were in agreement. The monster would die, and regret it’s evils before it did.
This had to end now. A filly was watching.
“Cover your eyes,” I said aloud.
To my surprise, she obeyed.
Taking a deep breath to focus myself, I widened my stance and swung my blade. I felt it bite into flesh, and bone. Mai’s headless body remained standing for a moment, then toppled over, falling to the ground with a wet thud.
Chem remained silent for a moment, then looked at me with pure gratitude in his eyes.
“Thank you… I can keep one person’s hatred of monsters in check. I can’t keep two,” he sighed wearily, turning the blade to look at it. “I don't think I want to wield you again even if you’ll let me. But I will honor our arrangement. I’ll put you somewhere for a real hero to find.”
He flexed his hoof, and the sword vanished in a flash of white light. Hopefully returning to where it came from instead of going to some random place.
I flinched slightly. “Uh, is that the best id-”
Chem and I yelped in shock as Mai’s body began to boil, dissolving into a puddle of liquid. The pool quickly dissipated, vanishing into nothingness as it evaporated into a cloud of dull yellow smoke. I swore I saw some pattern or symbol in the cloud as it twisted and rolled before vanishing completely. Judging by the terrified look on his face, Chem did too.
“OH FUCK ALL KINDS OF DUCK!” Chem yelped, his tail standing upright.
Wait, did he just swear? That was the first time I’d heard him swear. This couldn’t possibly be good.
Chem raced over to and grabbed me by the shoulders, looking me dead in the eyes. “Did discord find ANY trace of Voidborn in this reality when you purged that cult!? DID HE SAY THERE WAS ANY THREAT BESIDES THEM!?” He demanded with impossible urgency.
“N-No!” I stammered. “He said we got everything! It was just some minor thing? Why?! What’s wrong!?”
“THa- that… her… It’s signature, I…” Chem closed his eyes and took a few rapid breaths. “You are SO FORTUNATE that group didn’t make it past a cult because that… THING was made using the King’s power. Discord would know if he were here. He’d have to. All your gods would have to, there’s no way they could miss the presence of a true Great Old One.”
“I- um… S-so that’s the-” I gulped nervously. “The ones I thought you were?”
“HAHAHAHA, no!” Chem laughed in genuine terror. “That’s the kind which eat that kind! Dodged a bullet! Ow… Heart stopped. Always wondered what heart attacks felt like. This really sucks.”
Eats… That… Kind…
One moment.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”
Okay. There. Got it all out of my system silently.
“STOP SCREAMING IN THE STREET!” Somepony yelled from their window. “Foals are trying to SLEEP!”
Oops...
I looked at Chem, completely pale and thoroughly terrified. “What do we do?”
“Nothing. It’s fine. Just some of his power used here-” Chem said pausing as she noticed the filly’s clipped ear, and calmly picking the severed tip up with his magic and sticking it back on. “- Sorry Aurora, let me just put that back for you.”
She tilted her head. “S-stick what back on?”
“A bit of your ear. It’s fine now. Don’t worry. Anyways, as I was saying, some of his power was channeled by a cult which was purged. We’re fine. It’s all fine. You go home and live your life. I need to go back to Lyra and get her to make some more Void Snares just in case any of my kin ever actually DO come here,” Chem babbled worriedly.
Aurora squirmed next to me, looking more than a little afraid herself. “U-Um… W-will you be here t-tomorrow? Like you said?” She asked worriedly.
Chem shook his head. “No.”
Aurora’s ears feel like her joy had been sucked into a black hole.
“I didn’t finish,” Chem said. “Giving you luck boosters and wards is no longer an option. You’re coming with me. I’m not letting you live on your own when monsters like that exist in this world.”
“Okay,” the little pegasus said with a relieved flutter of her wings.
“Wait, she’s homeless?” I asked worriedly. “Are you SURE?”
Chem shook his head. “Not anymore she’s not.”
“I’m not?!” Aurora yelled in a half panic.
“You’re not. You’re living with me,” Chem clarified, the little filly relaxing immensely. “I’ll see Twilight tomorrow to take care of this officially. You go home and get sleep if you can… I’ll look into seeing if she’s truly dead or if she will reincarnate again as soon as possible. We need to remove any trace of the King in Yellow from this universe permanently. Understood?”
I nodded. “Understood.”
Shouldering my naginata I stumbled towards my door, legs just now starting to throb with pain from a few strikes Mai’s flail had got in on me which I hadn’t noticed in the heat of battle.
As I turned the doorknob to go inside, the worst thought occured to me. I’d thought Mai was dead or gone and this was all over twice before. It couldn’t be. It wouldn’t be.
Call me paranoid but this was far from over.
Like Mai had tried to say, third time’s the charm.
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Sherbet, you're an idiot. Discord himself said he can't see in certain places. You have evidence there's been more activity from said beings, or at least groups. And then you go and say you are sure they have been erased? Sure, the adrenaline and trauma from seeing the dead come back in a non comedic nor necromanctic sense might explain it, but you should be more genre savvy!
Epic quote. Don't know the source material, though.
Same for the sword. Is it from somewhere or you create it, meeps?
Aww, chem was reading discworld for foals it the street. He's best Eldritch Abomination Uncle ever
That filly has waaaay too much guts. How doesn't she go clang clang while walking around? Is she a lost rainbow foal?
8550299
Me :3
The biggest clue is in the chapter title. Here you are.
It's the best not-children's book series that children should be read.
If I give her brass balls Popmannn will yell at me for having another herm character. So, sadly, no y.y (But I totaly would :c)
Redwall books were a favorite of mine. Still read them occasionally.
But Chem stole Martin's Sword? Kind of an important thing to remove from a universe.
That filly was such a cool character can't wait to see what her and cham get up to.
Brilliant as always, although I particularly liked the idea of a Neutron Star powered cyborg just calmly answering the door - you kind of expect more action, less ordinary things.
8550776
Well, more like he saved it from destruction if it were to be destroyed in the distant future or removed it once truly forgotten so that it wouldn't die with that universe.
8550776 He didn't steal it per-say. He waited for the universe to be about to reach heat death (IE the end of time as far as we're concerned) and picked it up as a memento.
8550931 One of these days, when I'm writing original fiction, I hope to sell the movie rights to something and have a scene like that appear in a feature film. Just some full brainbucket cyborg in the background, doing normal shopping, with all the war gear you can imagine just holstered or inactive. "Linda, did you want the normal, or the deluxe paper towels? ... They don't have premium. ... Linda, I'm live streaming my vision to you. You can see they don't have- NO they are NOT on the middle shelf, I'm looking right at the middle shelf! You can see they are not here."
8550841I've got some plans :3
8550776 It was amongst the things that he said he would not allow to be lost due to the heat death of their home universe....so I don't think there was anyone left to need the bladr when he took it.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/517/111/fbd.jpg
Well you're half right, just never say Kaz is a child to the rest of her herd, I don't care if your Voidbourn they will buck you up.
Awwww Chem is a bit softy who just really like adventurous kids.
Hero in training here folks, take note.
Well that came out of left field.
She's got you there, also she has a sneak level far exceeding that of the towns guard.
Awwww Chem like the little filly!
That will be an interesting encounter
Wait for it...
Yep, there it is. Alright, lets sit back and...
Well, no question who it is now.
You have no idea.
And suddenly I think Mai like getting killed over and over again
Sweet! it's a soul blade!
Alright, I just want to point something out here, Chem specifically said mortals couldn't access his closet after covering the 'door', and yet she got out airgo accessing the closet. Think on this fellow readers.
Amazing what shock and adrenalin can do.
Yep never anger the reformed villain, they will revert back to their villainy just to buck you up.
"In Soviet Russa blade wield you."
I'll see my self out
I think we would all like to know, and I think we shall find out.
Yep.
This is completely the appropriate response here, finding out that an everything eating creature has your universe in its sights should be met with panic.
No, no were not, you know when someone says that, then things are anything but fine.
Yes Chem, rais her as the chosen one, teach her the ways of the force and... oh wait wrong universe. Still, I'm interested to see where this go's.
8552617
Woot! More transformer mini-con power armor awesomeness!
But also to be fair, what nation could she rule? its not like Celestia has a bunch of those lying around... right?
Yes Sweetie Belle, accounting for commercial breaks and such.
You heard it here folks, Lyra for next Voidbourn!
8552663
Indeed! Mostly because they love all the silly over the top things he does XD
Of course she does. town guards are the most inept things in fiction. Ordinary farmhands armed with anything at hand always beat them by the dozens :P
"I'm death."
"But... you just heard me and understood!"
*facehoof*
I read that in this voice
The best one too :D
Not necessarily! The villein placed a hero in an inescapable place containing many means by which they could die an overly elaborate death. Of course she got out without a scratch, effortlessly, and the very moment the guard stopped looking.
Yep never anger the reformed villain, they will revert back to their villainy just to buck you up.
Not at all that was great ^.^
Not quite enough AAAA if you ask me, but a good start!
Exactly!
Who says he can't do that? Magic sticks with you when you cross universes. Pop into a galixy far far away, train her in the use of the Force, come back, she'd keep those abilities. You take magic with you. (I say he wont though because that would be too silly, even for me.)
I just finished catching up finally aaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Also Chem is best. I shall call him Bufftats.
8552698
Sorry about the girl thing. I typically assume a person on the internet is male. Since I've never seen your face, I can't immediately assign your username to a face that I recognize as female. I know you're a girl, I just have trouble remembering to use proper pronouns. Sorry, this happens other times too :3
All characters tend to arrive at the same conclusions. Yeah, you just put a word to what I was thinking of, logic chains. For instance, in "Shall we play a game? - Part 2", this scene comes up:
Any person I know would NOT have arrived at this conclusion. At finding out there was no reason to stay and their friend was not in danger, they would demand to be released. Maybe it's because ponies are more empathetic, but it still makes it hard to relate. I would probably have done that too.
It's also because I talk to you a lot. I made this voice for you so when I read something you wrote it says it for you in my mind, and unintended, it is the same voice that I imagine when I read your stories. I can't understand it, but it just feels the same! I can't come up with an explanation, but I would if I could since you'd probably like that.
Oooo, a spunky sidekick/daughter figure.
Mei is never actually prepared for these Sherbert fights she picks, and it's frequently not even Sherbert's fault.
8553013 This is Twilight Sparkle talking. SHe's this empathetic in the show. Or did you forget about the time that the most evil character in the show looked sad and said "I'm sorry" and was totally and instantly forgiven even though that totally would be a bluff IRL to let her get into killing range?
I can understand that complaint if the person involved was anyone other than someone who is supposed to be the Alicorn Princess of Friendship. Especially if it were me. I dont work like that at all. I would have continued to attack until it was dead because leaving a thing that attacked me alive means it will attack me again, or flee if I felt I couldn't win.
And I do try and write Ponies with some non-human traits. They are not humans. Why should they be written as humans? They shouldn't be. That would be bad writing. It would be taking an entire species that's NOT HUMAN and making them humans in costumes. I HATE THAT so much... It's the worst trope. The show has ponies being very empathetic, with the odd bend into irrational angry, and a little bit derpy. That's how I try and write them.
8553593 She also probably threw the first knife at Aurora assuming the tiny pony was Kazumi. Mai is Chaotic Stupid.
8553694
It is the worst trope... it applies in fantasy a lot. It's why I like LOTR so much, he didn't follow trends, he made them. He also thought outside the box when it came to Ents and the mythology. But nowadays there are a lot of unimaginative fantasy worlds. Like for instance:
Orcs are always based on vikings/germanic savages
Humans a lot of times have a roman like empire or a greek paradise
Elves ALWAYS love trees and the enviroment for no reason.
There is typically a mythology that surprise surpise works in the exact same two ways EVERY TIME.
-gods cant interfere with mortal affairs but will grant quests or some bullshit
-gods happily interfere and fuck around often causing the conflict
Dwarves are always "stone people" but this makes sense, considering folklore and how intertwined they are.
Wizards are either bumbling idiots or wise beyond anyone in the story.
This really annoys me.
8553780 I wasn't talking about cultures. I was talking about basic phycology. Lets' take Star Trek. Ignoring the aliens designs, because the show had the budget of a ham sandwich, of course.
Vulcans are just Buddhists with a dash of asshole. They act all calm, logical, and such, but are kinda dicks.
Klingons are just stock human barbarians. They all are agressive, have a warrior culturee's mindset, and are just stock barbarians.
Ferengi are an exaggeration of the "Greedy Jew" stereotype.
Romulins are just typical humans with our worst traits turned up to 11.
But they are all using a human mindset. ANd Human logic. And have Human values. Except they are NOT HUMANS.
See what I mean? These are aliens, with alien DNA, Alien brains, and Alien instincts. But they all act like humans. That pisses me off so much! Their phycology should be different, their logic should be different. They have different biology, cultures that have nothing in common with earth culture.
And yet, inevitably EVERY ALIEN SPECIES IN POPULAR FICTION IS OBVIOUSLY JUST HUMANS IN A COSTUME!
8553917
But..that's what I said..
Yeah, I agree.
8553963 /me rereads. "Huh... Your wording makes it realy seem like you're talking about the people as a whole, not the actions of individuals all having human motivations, thought processes, and so on. I guess that's just me?"
8554013
I am confused.
Oh dear god. It seems life had an existential crisis planned today.
8928988 :D Someone else red Redwall?! Brother, where have you been? The feast starts in just a few hours. If we dont hide int he cellar now the Abbot will make us do something to help. Probably moving that heavy oak table about...
Yeah I'd be pretty terrified to if he was anywhere near my reality.. awesome chapter, I'm loving Chem even more