3: Just a Kiss
Applejack Anonymous
a My Little Pony fanfiction by Clavier
Chapter 3
Just a Kiss
“Fluttershy…”
She blinked. The world slowly twirled into focus. She was still in Sturdy’s house, quite comfortably lounging on the couch. A simple brown quilt she hadn’t seen before had at some point been laid on top of her. And Fluttershy was gone.
… Fluttershy?
She bolted to an upright position, barely stopping herself from yelling out. Twirling, she tried to remember what had happened; why was she still here, why wasn’t she at home? Her eyes locked on the ornamental fireplace at the far end of the room.
It was still blurry, still a haze. She squinted and focused carefully on it as it slowly became crisp in her vision.
There was nothing remarkable at the corners. There were certainly no apples carved into it.
Another dream.
She breathed a sigh of relief, but it was only momentary. These awkward dreams were giving her a headache, and that was exacerbated by the sound of hoofsteps from another room. A door opened, and Sturdy Foundation peeked her head in.
“Hi, Applejack. Sorry for the surprise! You must’ve been mighty tired when you came in here; by the time I finished with your wheel, you were asleep.”
She shook her head. “Uh, thanks. Ah’ll just be goin’ then.”
Sturdy burst through the door. “Oh no you don’t! It’s the middle of the night, and you’re my guest now! You can sleep in here.” She indicated to her bedroom with a hoof.
Applejack’s first reaction was terror. Then for a moment she considered Rainbow Dash’s suggestion: Could she use this situation as a blessing? Here was a strong, fit mare suggesting that she–
Her thoughts careened into a brick wall. That shock manifested as action, and she bolted from the house before Sturdy had a chance to react. Faster than she ever had before, Applejack reattached the harness to her apple cart and took off into the night.
OK, Applejack, it’s not what you think. Although she’s probably pretty mad at you now. Dang it, now you’re gonna have to go apologize to her… so long as you stay out of her house when you do. Of course, you were probably just imagining things…
She pushed all her energy into her run. The cart glided smoothly along behind her; Sturdy had obviously done more than just replace one wheel. Darn, now you have to apologize to her and thank her. Still, she pumped her legs harder, driven by fear. Mostly fear of herself, and of her mind and her dreams.
The houses whizzed by, soon replaced by trees whizzing by at the same fervent pace. She arrived at her homestead in record time, albeit at a record expense to her muscles. She locked away the cart and walked, now at a reasonable speed, to the door of the house proper. Fearing waking her family, she opened it slowly.
Big Macintosh sat at the kitchen table, nursing a mug of cider. When she nervously poked her head through the front door, he gave her a look.
He could communicate a lot through looks. This look said, “Just where have you been?”
She narrowed her eyes, in no mood for his judgment. “Ah’m a big pony now, Ah can get home whenever Ah like.”
For a moment he furrowed his brow, but then a smirk slowly worked its way onto his lips.
“ ’tain’t nothin’ like that!”
He was clearly unconvinced.
She shook her head. “If Ah ever start babblin’ about settlin’ down again, promise me you’ll smack me right ’cross the jaw.”
His smirk twisted into an unreadable expression, but she didn’t stay around to see it. She was already most of the way up the stairs before he had a chance to speak, so he shrugged and headed to bed himself.
That was the last time he brought it up. For the next five days, he just let Applejack have her space; she carefully shirked all work that involved going into town, opting instead to focus on a new cultivar of apples that the family had only recently started growing. That was the hardest job on the farm, and Big Macintosh made no protest of leaving it to her, dragging the apple cart to town and back himself. That task was made even simpler by the fact that the apple cart had become mysteriously easier to haul.
Applejack made the excuse that she was preparing for the upcoming town fair. Of course, she had no intention of going, but she planned to think of an excuse for that when the time came. Until then, she would prepare the apples and try not to think too hard about missing the first fair in years.
She enjoyed the solitude. Usually she liked being around her friends, but this week, she had enough of them in her dreams…
⁂
“You know what’s even more fun than having you put on dresses, Applejack?”
Applejack dreaded to know the answer, but had no real choice other than to play along. Rarity had her strung up in garments she didn’t even recognize, and she couldn’t escape. “What’s that?”
Without warning, the stockings she’d been forced into constricted, dragging her legs together. She tumbled off the small stand she had been placed upon to model, landing on the soft carpet below. From her restrained position on the ground, she looked up at Rarity in horror. The couturier flashed a villainous smile.
“Taking them off.”
⁂
“Hrrrng! I just can’t quite reach this book! Spike? Spike!”
“Uhh, why don’t ya just use magic.”
Twilight sighed, putting a hoof to her horn while the other three maintained her precarious balance on the ladder. “The doctor says my horn flu won’t completely go away for another three days… it’s really frustrating.” Her reddened nose twitched and she put her other front hoof in front of her mouth, to block the sneeze and avoid damaging books. That hoof was, of course, all that was maintaining her balance on the ladder.
With a twist in the air and a yelp, she tumbled directly onto Applejack, knocking them both to the floor.
“Oof!”
“Oh, sorry, Applejack… I just lost my… balance…”
In spite of that, she made no attempt to regain her balance, or even get up. If anything, she only got closer.
“Uh… Twi?”
“Without my magic, I feel so… naked…”
Applejack tried to pull away, but could only push herself further into the floor. “Twilight…”
“I need somepony…”
“Not me, Twi…”
“Somepony to hold me, to protect me…”
⁂
“Ah–Ah’m sorry, Fluttershy! Ah didn’t mean t–”
“You could’ve killed her! Poor little thing, how was she supposed to know you were threshing that field today?”
“Ah don’t know, it was an accident! She… she’s gonna be OK, right?”
Fluttershy scowled. She was truly terrifying when she was angry. “She’s going to be fine, no thanks to you.”
“Ah… Ah got her here as quick as Ah could!”
Fluttershy’s eyes widened. Applejack reeled in horror.
The Stare. Nopony could endure The Stare.
“You’re going to have to be punished for this, Applejack.”
“Wh–where did that whip come from… Y–ya didn’t have that before…”
⁂
“There ain’t no ropes in the world Ah can’t get out of!”
As if accepting her challenge, the ropes binding her legs to the ground began to glow magenta, and lost every bit of slack they’d had.
“Aw fiddlesticks.”
⁂
By the time Tuesday finally rolled around, Applejack was in bad shape, both from overexerting herself on the farm and from severe sleep deprivation. All she wanted to do was to take a day off to lie in bed and rejuvenate.
But it was Tuesday. And she was curious.
After a few final touches on the fair stand, advertising their newest cultivar, she headed into town. As they had been the last week, the streets were barren. Walking through a ghost town was an unusual experience, even if she knew full well that the town wasn’t really abandoned.
It’s easy to go through life with no real notion of silence. When not surrounded by the sounds of nature, one is surrounded by the sounds of civilization, and when civilization is not present, nature assuredly is. True silence—the total lack of all noise, be it the chatting of friends, the hawking of wares or the chattering of birds—is maddening.
Almost as maddening as knowing why Ponyville was so silent in the first place.
Still, in a way it was relaxing. It had been five days of tending trees nonstop, so anything that kept her a bit less sweaty—or at least, less sweaty from physical exhaustion—was a welcome reprieve.
Applejack arrived on the campus of the West Ponyville Institute of Geology and Mining near noon, by the reckoning of her antagonistic stomach. Pushing that feeling aside, she wound her way through the campus, quickly remembering where the meeting was taking place. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were already there.
“Oh, hi–”
“Shhhh!” Pinkie hushed her, captivated by the events of the meeting. She pushed a red-and-white striped bag full of buttered popcorn towards Applejack, but didn’t look away from the window. Eagerly, Applejack grabbed the bag and joined in.
Inside, Fluttershy stood at the podium, ushering away a very self-satisfied-looking Cherry Berry.
“Well, um, thank you, Cherry Berry…” Fluttershy’s meek tones carried no small amount of embarrassment with them. “I’m not really sure, um, given the nature of our group, whether a youth division would be… well, appropriate, but I’ll write down a note to vote on it at the next meeting.”
She mimed writing, although it was quite clear that she had no intention of putting any words to page. It was far from a convincing performance, but Cherry Berry couldn’t have seen it anyway, as she was facing the opposite direction while walking back to her seat.
“Now, before lunch, we have one major order of business.” Fluttershy cleared her throat, a wide smile slowly sneaking onto her muzzle. “As many of you know, I’ve been the president of our little group since… well, since Bon Bon and I founded it! And every time I tried to elect somepony else, you all voted for me”—her voice sank—“and every time I tried to make a law that allows the president to abdicate, you voted it down”—from outside she was now barely audible—“and every time I begged you to make somepony else president, you wouldn’t do it and she only got one vote… Mine…”
Her concentration drifted for a moment, but she soon snapped back to her happy demeanor. “But I’m overjoyed to announce that at last week’s impromptu election, you finally voted for a new president! Who isn’t me!”
Most of the audience just chuckled at this, exchanging conspiratorial looks.
“So, without further ado, please welcome our new president, Twilight Sparkle!”
All eyes focused on Twilight. She froze, eyes wide, mouth agape, staring at the stage.
“Oh, um… I’m sorry, Twilight, but like I was saying, we don’t have any bylaws that allow you to refuse office.”
“B–but I just joined last week! I don’t even know what the president does!” She began to tremble, bouncing nervously on her hooves. “I… I don’t have a checklist for that!”
“Well, if you really don’t want to do it”—Fluttershy’s voice almost vanished entirely—“I guess we could have another vote and they’d probably elect me again…”
Applejack knew full well that as meek as Fluttershy could be, it was effectively impossible to say “no” to her. Twilight was certainly powerless to refuse. “Well, I guess I can try…”
Fluttershy perked up in an instant, and she joyously escorted Twilight to the front. “I promise you’ll love it! I’ve already made the schedule for today and the next two meetings, so you just need to…” Her voice died away as she chatted in private with Twilight. The audience broke for a rather informal lunch in the meeting room, and Applejack turned to her friends.
“Am Ah hearin’ things, or is this little club that organized? It has a president? It has bylaws?”
Rainbow just shrugged at her, still chewing a mouthful of popcorn.
“Uh… where’s Pinkie?”
“Oh my gosh, that looks so delicious!” Pinkie’s voice from the meeting room made it immediately obvious where she was. “You always make the best sandwiches, Rose!”
Pinkie wandered from table to table, sampling the wide array of food without a care to the fact that she didn’t belong there. “Oooh, is this an authentic Sweet Apple Acres apple?” she inquired obliviously at one table. “It’s sort of like having a piece of Applejack right here with us, isn’t it!” Laughing at her own comment, she slowly twisted her head until she was looking directly at Applejack, making it clear that anypony could see her if they just looked that way.
Applejack ducked into the bushes, and used the cover to sneak out of view. Rainbow Dash followed her until they were nearly a block away, easily out of earshot of the group.
“I’m telling you,” Rainbow whined, “your only problem is your attitude. If I were in your horseshoes, I’d be having fun with this! Heck, even you’ve gotta have something to gain, surely the mare of your dreams is–” She stopped, suddenly introspective. “Wait, do you even like mares?”
Applejack stared at her hooves. “Look, to be honest Ah ain’t sure any more, but Ah don’t think this is the best way to find out.”
Rainbow scoffed. “And going crazy is?”
“Ah don’t know, maybe it is!” For a moment, Applejack just furrowed her brow and affected an expression somewhere between bemusement and frustration. She muttered, to herself but loud enough for Rainbow to hear, “What is it that Granny Smith used to say…”
“When the world’s gone crazy, don’t worry and fret…”
“… just go crazy along with the world.”
⁂
“A kissin’ booth?!”
Applejack chuckled at her brother’s utter bewilderment. “Yup. Somethin’ tells me Ah can make a bundle o’ bits that way.”
“What about the apple stand?”
She waved a hoof in the air nonchalantly. “You can run the stand just fine without me, and with both of us runnin’ our own, even with three quarters goin’ to the orphanage, we’ll make off like bandits!”
Big Macintosh studied her expression carefully for a few seconds. By great willpower, her demeanor didn’t waiver in the slightest. Finally, he relented. “Well, if ya think it’s a good idea…”
“Ah do! Now come on, let’s get goin’!”
Applejack’s booth was simple and sparsely decorated, and pulling it was a trivial matter. And frankly, she was excited to get to the fair and set up. As they walked, she babbled to her brother about how much fun the fair always was, and how she had a feeling that this year was going to be more fun than ever. Ultimately, though, she felt guilty for making him participate in this farce without explaining it.
“Look, Big Mac, the fact is, there’s somethin’ real weird goin’ on in this town, and somehow Ah’m smack-dab in the middle of it.”
Big Macintosh, dragging a much heavier load, was by this point well out of earshot, so Applejack was really just talking to the open air. She, of course, didn’t notice this.
“Y’see, Ah’m not exactly running a kissin’ booth just ’cause Ah think it’ll be fun…”
It was a brilliant plan, as far as she was concerned. Push everypony over the edge, and one of them would be bound to admit something. Once one confessed, the others would fall like dominoes. And once everything was out in the open, her life would be at least a little bit simpler. More complicated than before she ever discovered their little group, sure, but a lot simpler than it was with all the secrets hanging about.
She had just finished explaining this to her brother when she arrived at the gate to the field where the fair was to be held, and turned around to get his opinion. After a second, she put a hoof to her head.
“Maybe if ya talked more, ponies’d notice when you weren’t there.”
Still, this was no time for finding wayward family members. Without him there to talk her out of it, all she could do was continue; she had a plan to enact, and a town full of lustful mares to torment.
It was still early in the morning, and the fair had not yet started. She was ushered through to her spot by a stallion, though he seemed more occupied with hollering instructions to the other workers preparing the grounds than with leading her.
“Is there gonna be enough room for a line here?”
He gave her a confused glance.
“Well, Ah don’t want to block off any o’ the other stands is all.”
Looking around at the empty field, he chuckled lightly. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.” With that, he went back to helping other ponies with their stands, and Applejack set up her own, though there wasn’t much to set up.
Slowly, the field filled with stands and stages, tents and booths, and the hustle and bustle of ponies getting prepared. When Big Macintosh finally arrived at the fairgrounds with the apple stand filled to the brim with all manner of apple treats, he gave Applejack an unhappy glance, but passed by without a word.
At nine o’clock, a bell sounded, and ponies began to file in. They spread through the grounds, oohing and aahing at all of the many activities available to them. And one by one, they noticed Applejack’s booth.
For most, the reaction was the same. They stared, eyes wide and mouth agape. Soon they would realize they were staring and become suddenly interested in the most mundane aspects of life, such as whether their hooves had been properly groomed that morning or just what shade of cerulean the sky would be for the fair. After realizing that that was even worse than staring, they’d look back again, give an uncomfortable smile, and move on.
Having opted for insanity, Applejack enjoyed this to no end. She waved and grinned, and mares blushed and hid their faces. And for the first twenty minutes or so, that was all.
That didn’t last long. Ponies gathered in collective stupefaction at the opportunity, examining the booth, its sign, and most of all, Applejack. There wasn’t a line at first, just a not-very-inconspicuous ring of mares trying not to look like a not-very-inconspicuous ring of mares. They dawdled and chatted amongst themselves, but none breached the imaginary barrier they’d formed around the stand.
Now Applejack was getting concerned. Whatever else she’d hoped to accomplish, she was sure she would get some bits out of this, and being awkwardly stared at does not earn bits. It was a hot day, she was stuck in a hot booth sweating through the brim of her hot hat, and she didn’t even have anything to show for it. She needed some mare to break the ice.
“Ooooooh!”
The mysterious yellow legs from a week prior gained a face.
“Well hello there, Candy Mane,” Applejack casually greeted her would-be debaucher.
“A kissing booth, that’s so clever!”
“What can Ah say,” she replied with a small grin, “you inspired me.”
“How m–”
Candy Mane toppled to the ground, struck by a blue comet. Rainbow Dash didn’t even take heed of her collateral damage before crying out, “A kissing booth?! And you didn’t tell me?!”
This situation was no more confusing than the rest of Applejack’s life at the time, so she shrugged it off. “Didn’t think ya’d mind.”
“Mind? Mind?!” Rainbow seethed, but immediately cooled down. “How much?”
“One bit. Seventy-five cents to charity, twenty-five to the farm.”
“Tongue?”
“Uhh, no, just–”
“Two bits for tongue!”
“Ah didn’t say– mmmf!”
Rainbow was never known for being shy, and she was no more shy here than anywhere else. She not only forced her own tongue into Applejack’s mouth, but also managed to coax Applejack’s tongue into hers. When the initial shock faded, Applejack allowed herself to get lost in the moment.
She liked it. It didn’t exactly feel right, but it certainly didn’t feel wrong, and it did feel… good. Rainbow was hardly restrained, and her probing tongue tickled the roof of Applejack’s mouth, but even that wasn’t bad per se.
Although Rainbow could probably have stood to brush her teeth more thoroughly.
Soon Rainbow pulled away, stammering. “W–wow! You’re gonna get tons of bits today, I guarantee it!” She leaned in close, lowering her voice. “And when everypony figures out why you’re doing this, we’ll all have a good laugh.”
“Aw, shucks. Thanks, Dash… Ah think. But don’t go tellin’ ponies that it’s two bits–”
“Two bits for tongue!” Rainbow trotted away, still with an almost impossibly wide grin. “What a deal!”
Applejack shook her head but stood her ground, while Candy Mane, having picked herself up and dusted herself off, deposited two bits and gave a sly wink. It seemed that Applejack’s price was set.
With Rainbow and Candy breaking the ice, ponies did indeed start to line up. With the exception of a brief lunch at the apple cart, Applejack’s schedule was filled. She was surprised—and relieved—to have a fair share of stallion customers, but none of them were especially compelling. Contrary to her plan, none of the mares mentioned anything or suggested that they might suspect what she knew.
There was a complication she hadn’t thought of. Although Apple Bloom—passing by with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle as a mass of giggles—didn’t seem to take much heed of the implications of her booth, Granny Smith gave her an odd look. Her mouth went dry and she had to take a short break. “That’ll be an uncomfortable conversation…”
Regrettably, with her attention constantly occupied, she didn’t even get a moment to try the other food or play the carnival games. As the afternoon dragged on, she saw that her bit bucket was filling faster than she’d ever seen, so she decided not to complain about missing out on some other fun.
Pulling away from a one-bit customer, she corrected herself. No. Not missing out on some other fun. Missing out on some fun. This wasn’t supposed to be fun.
“Next!”
“Oh, hi, Applejack,” Twilight greeted her friend cheerily, “what’s–”
Reading the sign, her face started glowing. “Y–you… kissing booth?”
Applejack just nodded with an innocent smile.
“I, um,” she spluttered nervously, “I just joined the line because I figured with a line that long it had to be good.”
“And Ah’m no good?” Applejack’s faux pout would have melted the heart of any mare; Twilight certainly didn’t have a chance.
“N–no, it’s not that, it’s just…!” Twilight responded defensively, still blushing furiously. She opened her mouth a few more times, but when she finally spoke she was nearly inaudible. “W–well, it’s for charity, right? How much?”
“One bit. Seventy-five cents to the orphanage, twenty-five cents to the farm.”
A voice from the line eagerly added, “Two bits for tongue!”
Twilight stared at her coin purse, as if its contents were suddenly foreign to her. She poked a few coins aside, looked back up at Applejack, blushed again, and looked back down. After repeating this procedure several times, with the next mare in line tapping her hoof impatiently, she smiled in meek resolve, coins in hoof.
She deposited two bits.
There was no magic in the kiss. In fact, there was nothing extraordinary about it whatsoever. Twilight was sheepish and subdued, but the curl of her lips pressing against Applejack’s betrayed her enjoyment of it. Knowing better of the situation, Applejack didn’t restrain herself at all; she watched Twilight’s cheeks glow with every new sensation.
With Rainbow and most of the others it had been more than a little bit awkward. But something about Twilight’s poorly-hidden affection made it… fun. Even playful. Applejack felt like a filly again.
⁂
“Whoo-ee! My mouth is numb!”
Big Macintosh arrived at the booth at the end of the day with a smug look on his face. That quickly vanished when he saw Applejack’s haul. The three buckets full of bits left him completely speechless—even more so than usual. Rainbow arrived shortly after him, clearly amused by this state of affairs.
“Hey, looks like you made quite a haul! So what’d Twilight say when she figured it out?”
Applejack’s levity vanished in an instant. Somehow in all her fun, she’d forgotten that there was supposed to be method to her madness. Nopony had shown even an inkling of suspicion, and certainly nopony knew that she knew about their group. Worse yet, after this stunt, she couldn’t just tell them she knew. Then they’d all make wild assumptions about what the kissing booth was really for.
“Uh… she didn’t figure it out.”
“What? That egghead?” Rainbow was more amused than shocked. “Guess she wasn’t thinkin’ with her head, if you know what I mean. So who figured it out? Fluttershy?”
“Didn’t see her…”
“Rarity?”
“Nope…”
“Uh… Candy?”
Applejack simply pursed her lips and slowly shook her head.
Shaking her head at the skies, as if even the air had cursed her friend, Rainbow asked a question to which she already knew the answer. “Did anypony figure it out?”
“Nope.”
“Uh, AJ,” Big Macintosh interrupted, “just what is everypony supposed to have figured out?”
Both mares had forgotten that he was there, silently watching with arched eyebrows. Now remembering him, Applejack turned stark white with embarrassment, and Rainbow burst out laughing at the whole situation.
“It’s… a long story, Big Mac.”
As it turned out, it wasn’t an especially long story. She told her brother about going into town on a Tuesday, finding the group, and watching how everypony acted around her. Rainbow filled in the particularly juicy details. Applejack neglected to mention her dreams to either of them. When she finished explaining her plan for the kissing booth, and how it hadn’t panned out like she expected, she couldn’t look Big Macintosh in the eyes. The whole situation was just too absurd.
He stared at them for a while, with narrowed eyes darting between them. When neither faltered from his expression alone, he began to press them. “So… almost every mare in Ponyville?”
Both nodded.
“All yer friends?”
“Well, except for Rainbow here and Pinkie Pie.”
“And Bon Bon and Lyra too?”
“Yup.”
He blinked, momentarily speechless. “Sounds to me like you could use some hard cider.”
“Like you wouldn’t believe.”
Somehow they managed to laugh it off and walked back home together without mentioning it again. Applejack offered to pull the apple cart this time, since Big Macintosh had pulled it out, and Big Macintosh agreed. Pulling the apple cart was quite easy as it was now completely empty. The kissing booth, contrarily, was now full of bits and considerably heavier. Still, he said not one word against hauling it himself.
They arrived at home and put away their carts, then sat at the supper table to discuss the events of the day. The conversation was a bit slow, as Big Macintosh remained silent, nodding or shaking his head as his only response, while Applejack skirted the more interesting details, being somewhat too embarrassed to talk about them. It wasn’t long, however, before that reluctance vanished along with several mugs of hard apple cider.
“Ah think Rainbow Dash must’ve been the worst kisser of the lot!”
Big Macintosh laughed along with her rambling story.
“Ah swear it’s like she never kissed a mare before in her life!”
He rolled his eyes, taking another sip himself. He was still nursing his first glass, while Applejack was on her sixth.
“But at least she paid! Some of them mares thought they’d get away with a freebie.”
Big Macintosh leaned his chin into his hoof, giving Applejack a playful stare. “Who’s the best?”
Applejack blinked and leaned back, allowing the alcohol to slosh around her brain before staring at the ceiling for a few seconds, deep in addled thought.
“Y’know what, Big Mac?” She leaned in, shakily balancing herself on one hoof on the table. “Ah think the best of the lot was–”
Her hoof slipped, and after a quick yelp in surprise, she found the hard table to be more comfortable than she’d expected. She smiled lazily before shutting her eyes to Big Macintosh’s concerned face, letting her snores be the only answer to his query.
Oh Twilight, you lovable rapscallion, changing continuity in ways that aren’t fully elucidated before the interseason break.
… so yeah, this story includes a pre-3x13 Twilight. Just in case you were wondering why she didn’t simply fly in that dream sequence or something.
(Pointless spoiler tag ahoy!)
EDIT: I forgot to mention as I always do, I love your comments! Comments are always my favorite form of feedback, so keep ’em coming.
… not that I have anything against likes and faves! 
Editor: TheNitroPony
Cover art: Mr Snowpony
Prereading: Jackie and Mr Snowpony
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There you go AJ, way to get something from the whole situation! And make some bits, too! *rimshot*
Applejack is finally getting some money out of this
Boo, boo! Some hints of AppleDash, but there's far more indications of Twijack! I am disappointed!
Still laughing my ass off, mind you, but...
!
I think that Applejack needs a date, desperately. Those dream sequences suggest to me that her dry spell has gone on far, far too long for the sake of her sanity!
I wonder if Twilight is now going to be the AJA fillies' new goddess for having the guts to actually dare to go to the kissing booth?
What sort of sad loser goes to a kissing booth anyway?
... Me...
Applejack, you are a cruel mistress and I love you because it. Show 'em how you do it on the farm!
Wow, 2 bits for tongue? WHAT A DEAL!!!!
I keep trying to guess if this is going AppleDash or TwiJack or someplace else entirely, and every time I find a clue one way it feints the other. I guess I'm just along for the ride.
But it's an awesome ride! Good job.
2136276
Here, I'll spoil the last chapter for you:
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today I learned a valuable lesson about friendship. Of sorts. Actually, I learned a valuable lesson about relationships, sex and having fun with life. That lesson is that monogamy is an invention of society, and there’s enough Applejack for everypony.
Right, Rainbow Dash?
Right, Twilight!
Right, Fluttershy?
Right, Twilight~
Right, Rarity?
Oh, what will my parents think…
Right, Lyra? Right, Bon Bon?
Mmmmf mmmf mmmmf.
Right, Pinkie Pie?
… Pinkie Pie?
Why isn’t Pinkie Pie here?
Of course, they won’t let Spike in on the fun even though they force him to take dictation…
(Technically not a spoiler since it’s a blatant lie. That’s actually from the second-to-last chapter.)
This
Fucking
Story.
2136331
Well of course. In the last chapter, Celestia, Luna and Cadance all join in.
Almost every mare except for RD and Pinkie? I think you're wrong about RD Applejack...
2136360
Dang it, now you’ve gone and spoiled my alternate universe story for how Twilight becomes a princess
I WANT TO UPVOTE AGAIN BUT i CAN'T
That's some good advice Granny.
2136362
Definitely. Now we just need Applejack to settle on RD.
Kissing Booth? Nice.
somehow i am not surprised that entire town is gay lol atleast the female part is
2136429
Yeah, that would be settling!
Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, ha eh.
You walked right into that one, y'know.
2136681
Wait, who's this one about? She's already dreamed about Rarity and Twilight...
I was gonna give the 300th comment a special reply, but then I accidentally posted the 300th comment.
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Oh gods, I just had a mental image of what the AJA youth chapter would be like.
Diamond Tiara: So I guess Silver Spoon and I started picking on Apple Bloom because we were jealous of her getting to spend so much time with Applejack. We stuck with the 'blank-flank' excuse because we couldn't admit the real reason, and it just sort of snowballed out of control from there. I'm sorry, you guys, if I'd known you two were the same way...
Sweetie Belle: Yeah, I guess it must've been rough. But if that's what it was about and you're really sorry, maybe we could get Apple Bloom to let you guys come to the slumber party at her place next Saturday. What do you think, Scootaloo?
Scootaloo: A-heh... I'm not... I mean, I'm just here to support Sweetie Belle. I'm all about Rainbow Dash, everypony knows that!
Sweetie Belle: Yyyyyeeaaahhh...
Well, we'll talk to Bloom and see what we can do.
Dream sequences aside, every character was spot on, and hilarious, but special mention goes to Rainbow Dash! Hope to see more of Rarity.
I could only imagine the look on everypony's face when they saw the booth
So, uh, I got 2 bits, is the booth still open?
All I could think of after the kissing booth...
http://kigaroth.deviantart.com/art/Applejack-Didn-t-Learn-A-Thing-Wallpaper-286335861
If I were Princess Luna, I'd also be sitting with a bag of popcorn, watching Applejack's dreams.
Rainbow Dash in this version is hilarius. And all the other characters are great! Can't wait until they all find out she knows about them.
sunday is best day now?
And really... two bits?? Outrageous! I could buy 0.1 cherries with that kind of money!
It's no use Applejack, they're too dense. You need to go more obvious!
"Hey, Twi? I heard there's ah new apple polishin' technique. Think y'all could help me research it and practise it?"
"Sure thing Applejack, when do you want to do it?"
"How 'bout right now? We can turn it inta a sleepover, just. Us. Two."
'oh dear, am I allowed to do that? Do the bylaws stop me from having a private sleepover with Applejack?' "Um... sure thing, A-applejack. B-but, I don't r-really have any apples at home."
"That's ok Twi, I got a half dozen on me that could use a good rub."
*gulp*
ALL OF THE TWIJACK!
Of course, with how quickly Rainbow seems to be changing from 'one night stand girl' to maybe thinking of AJ as more, there's that. And Rarity (who it would never work with, so please never go further with that, ever). And Fluttershy. And the needed confrontation with Bon Bon and Lyra over why she wasn't invited to their wedding (which will be the most likely way for them to end up coming out and telling her about the meetings, why hasn't she thought of that yet?).
You know, I'd say keep this going as is for as long as possible, but I think it needs some character development. So AJ's gonna have to start following Rainbows advice I think.
This is going to end up being ApplePie or Candy Apple isn't it? Just for the twist ending.
My reactions and thoughts:
- Please don't go the route of Dallas. Please don't go the route of Dallas.
- Seems like Pinkie has now joined the club; there were signs. If both her and R.D fall in, will they out A.J?
- I do find it a bit wired that no one at the meeting has brought up A.J's change of behavior. Don't the members monitor her at all in public?
- I can't tell if R.D was helping A.J or moving one step closer to falling for the gal herself.
- What's Rarity doing during all this?
- The scene with Twilight at the booth: So adorable!
I love watching Twi trying to deal with her new found feelings. Ignore Tchernobog, if you are tempted to go towards Applelight, you have my support. 
So... is Rarity actually a member of the club (and did she turn up to the kissing booth)? She's never been confirmed as being there, other than possibly grouped under the "All the mares in Ponyville" and or "all yer friends". Other than her appearances in the dream sequences, she seemed like one of the few who at least managed to hide her interest in AJ.
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God I love this fic.
More please?
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(Not replying to bits that would require spoilering)
As in Debbie Does?
What makes you think they haven’t? We have AJ’s perspective, and she’s hardly privy to the complete goings-on of the meetings.
It didn’t happen to be relevant, but if you’d like to know my head-canon, she was running her own booth. Hence why she didn’t show. Believe me, she’s still in the story, I would never forget about good ol’ Rarity.
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I don’t believe I’m spoiling anything by saying that yes, Rarity is a member. AJ has not had any dreams about mares who were not actually members of the group. I sort of intended for the relevant dream sequence to be the final confirmation of that
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Glad ya like it. Every Sunday.
Ah, the kissing booth scene. Gotta love that!
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Dash definitely had fun! 
another great chapter
That was a fun and enjoyable chapter.
Equestria used to be so innocent until you added prostitution...
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It’s only kisstitution, nothing so lurid.
Hmmm. Granny Smith's advice makes sense. Too bad the plan didn't work. Though I get the feeling the ponies are more infatuated with Applejack than truly love her.
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I'm sorry, I think I missed the chapter where it was explicitly stated that she wasn't watching,
saves bits on clop 
And then Mayor Mare shuts her down and brings her in for prostitution.... But not before paying her own two bits.
2138383 Kissing is still the closest thing to coitus that the writers have allowed to be canon.
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And assuming Pinkie really isn't attracted to AJ in that way Pinkie is busy with Big Mac because everybody wants a piece of an Apple...
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Hey, at least they didn’t have a stork bring the baby Cakes
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“Everybody wants a piece of an Apple”
This needs to be a song.
This story! I love eet.
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Spitfire.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia.png
Also, moar Twijack. Is cuuuuuute.
Hmm, are there any out-of-towners in this group i wonder?
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Hmm, who has a magenta magical aura who had AJ tied up before...//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Trixie_lolface_2.png
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Which one is Candy Apple? Is that Applejack x Rainbow Dash?
2138588 I kind of wish there was so I wouldn't have to imagine the cakes in bed.