If Smosh Were Ponies

by Regidar

Barbershop Pole Returns

When Anthony awoke, Lyra, Ian, and Bon-Bon were laughing at him.

“What’s so funny?”

Ian tried to suppress a giggle, but ended up nearly throwing up.

“Uh, your hair, is... funny...”

“Really, let me fix it...” Anthony flipped his hair side to side. Lyra suddenly grabbed her lower abdomen.

“MY OVERIES!”

“Oh yeah, I forgot I could do that...”

“Anyway, you guys head over to Sugercube corner while I go get Lyra some replacement ovaries,” Bon-Bon said, putting Lyra into a cart and pulling her away.

“Aw man, I can’t wait to meet Pinkie Pie! This is going to be so awesome!”

The two friends turned pony set out to Sugarcube corner. However, they met somepony along the way.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?” The Teleporting Fat Pony asked.

“Hey! There you are! send us back!” Ian reached over for the device.

“No way dude! This is too sweet!” Anthony shoved Ian’s hoof away from the Teleporting Fat Guy’s wrist thingamabobber.

“Anyway, I gotta trot guys, I may have laid the wrong pony. See yah!”

Anthony stared after the Teleporting Fat Pony as he wobbled away.

“Huh. I wonder who-”

“OUTA MAH WAY!” Applejack smashed Anthony out of the way, into a nearby trashcan. “NOPONY LAYS MAH SISTER AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!”

“Jesus, the Teleporting Fat Guy- er, Pony sure is a pedo!” Anthony brushed the refuse from his coat.

“Yeah, sure, Scootalover,” Ian said, trying not to laugh again.

“What?” Anthony looked over at Ian, oblivious to the writing on his face.

“Nothing, man. C'mon, let’s go to this gay Sugarcube corner place.”

Once reaching Sugarcube Corner, Ian saw something that infuriated him beyond belief.

“BARBER SHOP POLE!”

Ian ran at full speed into the pole, smashing it, maiming it, hitting it with fillies, and other things.

“Hey, who’s attacking my pet barbershop pole?” Pinkie Pie bounced out of Sugarcube Corner. Anthony shrieked in pleasure.

“OHMYGODPINKIEPIECANITOUCHYOURMANEDOYOUSMELLLIKECOTTONCABDYIBETYOUSOOHMYGODOHMYGODERMAHGERD!”

“Um, what?” Pinkie said, obviously confused.

“Let me touch your mane!”

Pinkie Pie smiled nervously. “OKi doki loki! Just don’t get weird, ok?”

Anthony was chewing on her hair. “Mmm... cotton candy...”

“Ok, now see, that’s weird.”

Anthony spit out Pinkie’s hair. “Heh. Sorry. I’m just a huge fan, that’s all.”

“You’re not a fan, silly! You’re a pegasus! Those aren’t even related!” Pinkie laughed, then thought about that. “Or are they?”

Anthony laughed. “Sorry about your pet barbershop pole, Ian hates those. I’m Anthony by the way.”

Pinkie suddenly gasped. “OH MY GOODNESS! ARE YOU TOBUSCUS?”

Anthony looked at Pinkie Pie with a quizzical look.

“I’m just kidding, I know you’re Shane Dawson.”

There was an awkward silence, with only the sound of Pip being smashed into the barbershop pole to provide a background
noise.

“KIDDING! I noticed your cutie marks, and by the way, I love the food battles!” Pinkie Pie and Anthony walked into Sugarcube Corner, and Anthony got behind the counter.

“I hope you know how to handle the shop!”

“Trust me, I once sold Lemonade to a homeless guy. I know how the business world works.”

Anthony’s first customer walked in.

“Hi!” Scootaloo walked into the bakery. “I’m here to pick up a ‘Congratz on the sex’ cake for Applebl...oo...” Scootaloo stared up into Anthony’s smiling face with the prophetic words written upon it. Slowly, she turned around and sprinted out.

Pinkie Pie laughed. “You may want to wash your face.”

Anthony looked in a mirror.

“GOD DAMN IT IAN!”

Anthony went to wash his face, while Ian walked in looking very sweaty.

“Hey, do you have any more british kids? That one’s all used up.”

Comments

[Ninja Locust]

WAT

[AnotherStraightEdge]

WE STILL WANT MOAR!

[Flamesinger599]

'Congratz on the sex' cake.

God, I fricking love Scootaloo.

[Jspang]

924743 it's cool man, I just prefer toby. Don't let it happen again...

[RainDaze_the_Unicorn]

I hope Smosh actually sees this

[Edward Campos]

Bloody amazin' mate, keep em coming!

[RainbowDragon]

THIS IS MADNESS!!!!

[AdaConda]

924907 because I'm the Grandmaster.

[OnionPony]

FUCK SHANE DAWSON AND FUCK TOBUSCUS!!!!!!!!
Those YouTube Whores.................................

[stormscorpion]

ha ha ha that was so funny more plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Regidar]

925054 Pure awesomeness.

925058 OK! MOAR YOU SHALL HAVE!

925069media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldvdx3CBJf1qbjazd.gif

925091 There, I had Pinkie Pie like Tobuscus. YOU HAPPY NOW?

925105 Me too, I sent out a message on youtube with links, but I don't think they'll see it. If this story becomes hugely popular, then I'll probably have everypony who likes it send it to smosh themselves.

925236 Don't let 'em crash into your head!

925256 writingfrommyheart.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/challenge-accepted.png

925282 myconfinedspace.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/no-this-is-patrick.jpg

925657 I don't find Dawson to be that bad, but Tobuscus...

925999 Ok... for you.

926325 It's mah job!

[Jspang]

926461 wait, what? I was kidding

[YorkBrony]

Good god this is glorious

[SpyroFlame]

Toby get a shout out but not nova, come on man. Im really likeing the randomness of this

[Regidar]

926739 Lol. I thought I might put that in anyway, others were complaining.

926829 Thank you! I try my best

[Regidar]

926848 You'll find that I am going to shout out many youtube celebrities. Just you wait.

[KartalTheWriter]

I love how everypony knows who they are. I just imagine Lyra hosting special screenings where all interested ponies come and watch human youtube...

[Regidar]

927012 How did you know?

[KartalTheWriter]

927021 ...I have my ways.

[Regidar]

927023 25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m74nez3s3T1rv8jpzo1_r1_100.gif

[epicdonus1123 BOT]

ME WANT MOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Regidar]

927646 I'm writing the next chapter as we speak!

[MarkOfKhorne]

They should add this to Shut-Up Cartoons.

[ThisAccountIsFalse]

925657 Toby is cool though...

[Frank DuFresne (Doc)]

BARRELSHOP POLE KNIGHTS!!!

[meowcatz]

“Hi!” Scootaloo walked into the bakery. “I’m here to pick up a ‘Congratz on the sex’ cake for Applebl...oo...” Scootaloo stared up into Anthony’s smiling face with the prophetic words written upon it. Slowly, she turned around and sprinted out.

Pinkie Pie laughed. “You may want to wash your face.”

Anthony looked in a mirror.

“GOD DAMN IT IAN!”

LULZ ALL THE WAY!! image.minoc.com/zd_images/2012/22/lol_face.jpg

[derpy muffins]

OMFG I THINK MY SIDES SPLIT OPEN I WAS LAUGHING SO HARD!!!!!!! *checks sides* Eeyup! I was right!!!Lol

[derpy muffins]

I Just randomly got up and started bawking like a chicken and my mom had a look on her face like WTF IS WRING WITH U CHILD?? And I was like yolo

[DONTFOLLOWME]

Wat.

[DONTFOLLOWME]

926461NO THIS IS PATRICK!
I just jot diabeetus.
NO!

[DONTFOLLOWME]

Fuck tobuscus.
I Have pewdiepie
And barrels
Pewdiepie: FUCK YOU!
me:

[DONTFOLLOWME]

1006169 You need better dialoge. Your lines look like shit.

[ResidentZeldaBau5z]

925091 Damn straight!

[ResidentZeldaBau5z]

1435578 Serves you right for insulting the GREAT TOBUSCUS!

[D4ddy D15Cord]

“OHMYGODPINKIEPIECANITOUCHYOURMANEDOYOUSMELLLIKECOTTONCABDYIBETYOUSOOHMYGODOHMYGODERMAHGERD!”

dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Pinkie_loool.png <(LOL!)
then...
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_rainbowderp_flip.png <(wuts zat?)

COTTONCABDY

dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Pinkie_loool.png <(LOL EVEN MORE!)

[Chuckward]

gifbin.com/f/983839

[DONTFOLLOWME]

1537963 lolbrary.com/content/280/seems-legit-18280.jpg

[eridan_ampora]

LOL! Scootaloo picking up that cake was so funny

[Null_Void]

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

[Ignis Mortis et Doloris]

MY OVARIES

Hmmmm

[The 12th Doctor]

WAIT..... APPLEBLOOM HAD SEX?!?!?!?!?!?!?! WITH WHO?!?!?!?!?!

[Enderstorm]

3457208 The Teleporting Fat Guy (pony)

[Dustchu]

Trust me, I once sold Lemonade to a homeless guy. I know how the business world works.

Best Resume in the universe XD

Dude... you're killing my stomach with this! XD